Out of the Dark
by LizziF019
Summary: Hermione helps Bellatrix stay out of Azkaban and they develop intensely loving feelings for each other through it.
1. Chapter 1

**So, I'm taking a huge risk and posting my Bellamione story. I actually started writing Bellamione just for my own amusement.**

**I started writing backwards kind of….but I'm posting the first chapter, just to do it. If it sucks, oh well, I'm not going to school to be a writer, so whatever.**

**Anyways, my story starts off right after Harry, Ron, and Hermione are standing together after Harry broke the Elder Wand and threw it away. Bellatrix is obviously still alive. If anything else comes up that I've missed, I'll add in the next chapter if I even post it.**

**Oh yeah, ALSO, yeah, I know my story is like a lot of others. No, I'm not that creative and original. But I love the idea. Until Those Gilded Chains We Wear updates, here you go.**

After Harry had broken the elder wand, he and Ron went back inside Hogwarts.

"I'll come in a minute," Hermione said to them. There were many Death Eaters standing around not knowing what to do, some were apparating, some were confused. Hermione saw Bellatrix as one of them who were confused. She slowly walked over to her still leaning against one of the broken pillars. She was gripping the side of it with this weird look in her eyes. She looked up and saw Hermione a few feet from her.

"What do you want, _mudblood_," she spat.

_Maybe this was a bad idea_, Hermione thought.

"I-I just wanted to see if you were okay," Hermione whispered loud enough for Bellatrix to hear.

"Why the fuck do you care? Get away from me! You've probably come to take me to the ministry so I can go back to Azkaban! Well I'd rather DIE before I go back there!"

"No, no! I had no intentions at all to do that! I was just worried about you, even if you are, or were, on the opposite side of me."

"You filthy bitch, you're either downright stupid or you really are lying to me."

"I heard you're a great occlumens, read my mind if you don't believe me."

Bellatrix flipped out her wand at Hermione making her jump a little.

"Wait," Bellatrix said, "How do I know someone's not about to come out and capture me the moment I yell a spell?"

"If you're so worried, why not apparate? Why are you still even here?"

Bellatrix put her wand away, "Why are you so worried? Why are you here?"

Hermione bravely gave her a small and sweet smile, "Because I think that you might actually be relieved that he's gone, but everyone's against you. I can make it so they're not, if you really want to change sides."

"After everything I've done? Who would give me mercy? No one, that's who!"

"I would."

"You mudbloods are as bad as muggles. And they say you're the brightest witch of your age, PAH!"

Bellatrix scooted still gripping the pillar to the other side. She was facing the mountains with an insane look in her eyes and her teeth gritted. Hermione stepped closer to her. _I can still see the good in her_, Hermione thought, _I just need to stick with it, and maybe I can help her, and then maybe we can be friends, or even more…I'm going crazy_.

"I forgive you," she said confidently. She pulled up her left sleeve showing Bellatrix the scar she gave her that still clearly read 'MUDBLOOD.'

"Remember when you cut me," Hermione said to her, "My blood looked just like yours. We're the same, and to me, to be the same as you, is a compliment, I say."

She pulled her sleeve down and waited a minute, then started walking back to the entrance.

"Wait," Hermione heard Bellatrix say in a firm, but almost pleading, tone. "I have a choice?"

"You can either run and get captured and sent back to Azkaban," Hermione said, "Or you can put a little faith in me and possibly not go back to Azkaban."

"_Possibly_ not go back to Azkaban?"

"Well, I can't say the minister is going to agree with me. But it's worth a shot."

"Fine," Bellatrix grunted.

Hermione smiled, "Stay here, I'll be right back!"

Hermione had no idea what she was going to do or say to Professor McGonagall, or Harry and Ron for that matter. She walked up to Professor McGonagall.

"Ms. Granger," she smiled lightly.

"Professor, I have an odd question.. If someone from the dark side is willing to let us help them, and possibly come to the light side… can I help them?"

"The Ministry of Magic is creating something like a rehabilitation program. Are you speaking of anyone in particular?"

"Bellatrix Lestrange."

Professor McGonagall's eyes widened and Harry and Ron walked over when they heard the infamous name come from their best friend's mouth.

"What about her?" Ron asked.

"She…She said she's willing to try, Professor."

"Well where is she?"

"Outside."

"Come with me."

Hermione started to follow when Harry grabbed her arm, "Hermione?"

"Trust me, Harry. I'll explain later."

Bellatrix was starting to regret it already. _What was that stupid mudblood up to? She doesn't care about me. This is all a game. How dare they try to fool me now that the Dark Lord is gone. They would never mess with me this way if he was still here. Then again, I would never agree to go with her. I can now do whatever I want, without worrying about him._

Bellatrix placed her forehead against the pillar and whispered to herself, "Please, please, not Azkaban, no more…"

"Bellatrix," Hermione said getting her out of her daze.

Bellatrix turned around suddenly and saw Professor McGonagall. She gave her defensive look.

"It's okay, Bellatrix," Hermione said, "She's just here to help."

"Mrs. Lestrange, Ms. Granger has informed me of your decision to receive help from the ministry instead of returning to Azkaban, is this true?"

Bellatrix nodded her head a little and said lowly, "Yes."

"Well then, if you would allow it, I would like to escort you to the ministry of magic, along with Ms. Granger to speak with Kingsley Shacklebolt."

"Okay," Bellatrix answered hoarsely.

Professor McGonagall had no problem grabbing Bellatrix's arm as Hermione grabbed Professor McGonagall's other arm. They apparated to the entrance hall and everyone gasped as they saw Bellatrix. Bellatrix gave them a glare.

"Won't your friends be worried," Bellatrix whispered to Hermione.

"No, I already talked to them," Hermione answered.

Professor McGonagall still had a death grip on Bellatrix's arm. When they reached the minister's office, the door was already opened and Hermione followed Bellatrix and Professor McGonagall as they walked in together.

Shacklebolt raised his head with wide eyes when he saw Bellatrix. Bellatrix stared at him with no actual expression.

"Kingsley," Professor McGonagall started, "Mrs. Lestrange here has decided that she would like help from the light side to change her ways instead of being sent to Azkaban."

"Ahhh," Kingsley replied, "Well done, but, uh, why is Ms. Granger here?"

"She was the person who informed me," Professor McGonagall told him.

"And you talked to Ms. Lestrange about this personally," Kingsley asked Hermione.

"Just briefly, right after the war, at Hogwarts," Hermione told him.

"Well, we would love to work with you Mrs. Lestrange; you will, though, have to meet with my friend, Sybil Trelawney, once a week to track your progress."

"I won't have to talk to a therapist, will I?" Bellatrix asked accusingly.

"Well, I wouldn't know any other way…," he replied.

"I can watch her," Hermione said confidently, surprising herself.

Professor McGonagall turned to her, "Ms. Granger, are you sure you are able and ready to take on such responsibility?"

"I was the one who approached her in the first place. Why not? Besides, she's better off talking with me than with that wacko Trelawney."

Hermione looked over at Bellatrix and thought she saw a slight smirk.

"Well, alright, but we need to go over some things, take a seat, all of you while I look for my forms," Kingsley said.

Bellatrix sat stiffly in the middle of Hermione and Professor McGonagall.

"First off," Kingsley started as he was scribbling something down on the form, "Is there anything in particular that you ask of us?"

"Can I not be affiliated with my husband? I don't want to be Bellatrix Lestrange any longer. I'd rather be Bellatrix Black."

"That's fine, your husband, or now ex-husband is residing in Azkaban as we speak, so I don't think you'll be having to hear from him about the matter any time soon."

"And I agree with Granger watching me than someone who thinks they can just hypnotize me and get out all my dark secrets even if I don't want them to."

"It's settled then. I will meet with you two at the end of each week for the next month to check progress, and shall said progress have presumed, I won't be back until the end of the school year, which right now, because of the war, will be August 31 for seventh years. Sound fair? So starting today, May 2, 2008 until August 31, 2008, Ms. Black will stay in her own private suite under the supervision of Professor McGonagall and Ms. Granger at Hogwarts. Are you okay with this Ms. Granger?"

"Yes, sir," she replied.

"For now, Bellatrix can stay in a room here at the ministry until Hogwarts has built enough rooms for the students and extra bedrooms for guests. At the end of the sixth month, if I see it as fit, I will allow Bellatrix to go back to her manor, the Black manor, since no one resides there, as I am aware of. Hermione, I give you my full permission to be able to apparate inside and outside of Hogwarts to visit Ms. _Black_ anytime you need to."

Hermione nodded.

"Okay," Kingsley said putting the papers away, "I'll show you to your room, Ms. Black. Professor, you are free to leave or stay."

"I should be getting back. Will you be okay, Ms. Granger," Professor McGonagall asked.

Hermione again nodded and she apparated. Kingsley brought them to a large suite with a bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, and living room.

"I've wards up that won't allow you to leave without mine or Hermione's permission."

He nodded his head and left Hermione and Bellatrix alone.

"This is really nice," Hermione said walking around.

Bellatrix just shrugged and plopped down on the couch.

"Well," Hermione said, "I should get back to Hogwarts now."

"You're going?" Bellatrix asked turned around in her seat. "Will…will you come back?"

"Yeah, Bellatrix, of course."

"Only because you have to."

"Well that, and because I care."

Bellatrix scoffed, "Whatever," and walked into the bedroom and slammed the door shut.

Bipolar much, Hermione thought before apparating.


	2. Chapter 2

**Here's another chapter for you all that wanted me to continue! I appreciate the reviews, favs, follows, etc. **

**I forgot to mention that in this version, Ron and Hermione did not kiss and are not a couple.**

**So in the last chapter I said I wasn't going to school for writing. What I am going to school for is special education for students with emotional impairments. I feel like my Bellatrix probably has an emotional impairment. She's going to be very needy, cynical, and, well, emotional. Don't worry I'm sure I threw some crazy Bellatrix Lestrange in there somewhere.**

**I have two or three other chapters already written (since I said in the last one I started this for my own entertainment), so if you guys and/or girls like this one, I'll keep adding. **

Thankfully with the help of magic, Hogwarts got its common rooms and guest bedrooms set up in only two days. She started a blog she wanted to write in every night about her time with Bellatrix and her thoughts about it just to have something to look back at, and to show proof that she was getting better, if she ever did. Hermione hadn't visited Bellatrix since she dropped her off and felt nervous about facing her about it. She went back on Friday afternoon after classes.

"Hi," she said as she walked in to find Bellatrix lounging on the couch doing nothing.

"Finally you come back," Bellatrix spat angrily, "If it wasn't for the comfy couches and no dementors, I would've gone mad the same as I did in Azkaban."

"Sorry, there has been a lot of damage to fix."

"Not my problem. Aren't I supposed to be your main problem now?"

"Don't forget you're part of why the castle is damaged," Hermione said back to her. She went over and sat next to Bellatrix, a little too close for Bellatrix's comfort. "And you're not a _problem_. And although you are one of my top priorities now, I do have a life."

"Well Ms. Know-It-All, what are your plans for me?"

"I'm taking you to your new room at Hogwarts, it's basically the same as this one, and you aren't allowed to leave without me or Professor McGonagall."

"What about all my stuff, all my clothes?"

"They're all there waiting for you, now come on now," Hermione grabbed one of Bellatrix's tense arms and apparated them.

"This looks like a Slytherin guest room. Aren't I supposed to be near you, muddy?"

"You are, I just changed the color for your own liking."

"How kind," Bellatrix not really caring throwing herself on the bed and getting under the covers.

"You don't have to just sleep. I got you something, two things actually. One of them isn't coming until tomorrow. But here."

Hermione pulled out a cell phone.

"What is that?"

"It's called a cell phone, a lot of people at Hogwarts are using them now, even though they are considered a muggle device."

"Don 't want it."

"Well I'm leaving it here for you on the table. You can call me or text me, not that you know what any of that means since you don't seem to be too keen on it right now. But don't hesitate to play around with it. You can't break it."

"Oh I can't, can I?"

"Don't try taking it apart or throwing it, please. It cost a lot of money, and I only got it because of your bipolar personality of wanting me around and not wanting me around. So if I'm not around and you feel in a good mood that you might actually miss my presence, you can call or text me. It's probably better to text because if I'm not with you, I'm most likely going to be in class."

"Well you can go to class and leave me now."

"I don't have class anymore today, so I'm with you the rest of the weekend until Monday."

"I want to sleep, if you don't mind."

"You had two days to sleep, what were you doing while I was gone."

"Sleeping."

"Well, what the fuck?"

"Oh Granger, I didn't know you had a potty mouth."

"There's a lot of things you don't know about me."

"There's a lot you don't know about me either, like how even though I was out of Azkaban, I still had to sleep on cold grounds while the Dark Lord does whatever he wants."

"Care to tell me more?" Hermione sat on the side of the bed facing Bellatrix as she sat up stiffly. "I'm not going to bite you, Bellatrix. Are you just scooting away from me because I'm a "mudblood?"

Bellatrix didn't say anything.

"Look, you seem to trust me with some information on your time with Voldemort. If you want to talk more about it, if it bothers you, or if you need anything, just come get me, I'll just be in the living room reading."

"Won't you be bored without your friends around," Bellatrix said as Hermione walked towards the bedroom door.

"No, I'd be doing the same thing probably."

"You wouldn't be able to handle all my secrets. You'd be a sobbing emotional mess, and I'd be stuck in here to deal with you."

"Well good then, the tides will have turned, because for now I get to deal with insanity." And with that Hermione shut the door to Bellatrix's bedroom.

_Stupid, cute mudblood_, Bellatrix thought. _Cute? I need to be around my own people more, and not those ludicrous death eaters, I miss Cissy; and Andy, oh how I miss her._

Bellatrix stayed in her room messing with her new phone for a few hours. She had no idea what she was doing. She kept clicking buttons and then finally found her contacts. There weren't that many. She went down and found Hermione's name and clicked on it. There were two options, call or send a message. She tapped send a message and a keyboard appeared. She quickly learned how to use it and sent Hermione a message. After she pushed send, she heard an odd sound from the living room like a beep or jingle.

Hermione looked at her phone and smiled surprisingly to see a text from Bellatrix: What are you doing?

Hermione replied to her: Still reading. You?

Bellatrix: You've been reading this whole time? Do you not have any other hobbies?

Hermione: Of course I do. But I promised you I would stay here and hang if you need me.

Bellatrix: Hang? Is that mudblood slang? And why would I need you? I'm perfectly capable of feeding and washing myself; unless you would like to be my personal house elf.

Hermione: No it's not mudblood slang, and I'd appreciate if you stopped using that term. And I know you're not a baby (even though you sometimes act like it), you might need or want me for emotional support. And house elves should not be slaves.

Bellatrix: Fine, Granger. I'm not a baby, you just have a stick up your ass. You want my emotions? I can come out there and scream out all my anger and destroy the whole suite if you'd like.

Hermione: If it'll make you feel better. Sometimes you need to let it all out.

Bellatrix: You'd be pissed at me if I did that.

Hermione: Not really. I'd actually be relieved you're doing something other than hiding in that room. It's not like I can't make everything pretty again with a quick spell.

Bellatrix: Well too bad, I'm not in the screaming and angry mood.

Hermione: That's good. What kind of mood are you in then?

Bellatrix: I'm in a very bored mood.

Hermione: Well just remember that if you behave yourself and show progress, you'll be able to leave more and even by yourself. You won't need little old me to chaperone you.

Bellatrix: What if I want you to still chaperone me?

Hermione: You say that now, but if I try to get you open up more, you'll just shut me out again.

Bellatrix: Given up already?

Hermione: Of course not. I'm planning on poking at you every day until I've recovered all your dirty little secrets, mwahahahahaa.

Bellatrix smiled at her phone. _I really like this girl. And she seems like she really wants to get to know me_.

Bellatrix: Do you want to be my friend?

Hermione: I wish I knew the tone you're asking that in. Because I either take it as you're asking like a little girl in the playground, or you're asking in a mocking way.

Bellatrix: I'm not mocking you.

Hermione: I want to be your friend

Bellatrix: How did you make the face?

Hermione: You put : and ) together without any spaces. You can make all kinds of silly faces.

Bellatrix got off the bed and slowly opened the door to peak out. She saw Hermione reading at the kitchen table. She heard her phone go off again.

"I didn't send you another message back yet," Bellatrix said fully opening the door.

"That was from Ginny," Hermione said.

"You're talking to someone other than me," Bellatrix asked in a slightly angry, but jealous, tone.

"Yeah, keep your dress on," Hermione replied giving her a weird look.

Bellatrix walked over and sat across from Hermione.

"I'm hungry, and thirsty," Bellatrix said looking at her.

"Feel free to make yourself something," Hermione replied not looking up.

"How….how do you expect me to do that?"

Hermione slowly looked up with a sly smile on her face.

"Stop playing games with me, Granger! You know I grew up with a house elf to do everything for me."

"Do I look like a house elf to you?"

"Maybe a little bit."

Hermione rolled her eyes still smiling as she got up, "What are you in the mood for?"

"Whatever's the quickest to make. I haven't eaten in almost a week."

"Merlin, Bellatrix, why?"

Bellatrix just shrugged and looked away. Hermione knew it was probably Voldemort issues.

"Here's some orange juice, with calcium, you need some calcium in those bones."

Hermione put the orange juice back in the fridge and walked back over in front of Bellatrix putting her hands on the table, "Don't take offense to this, because my parents are dentists."

"Why would I ever take offense to anything you have to say? And what's dentists?"

"Dentists are muggle doctors that fix people's teeth."

"I know my teeth are horrible, but I'm NOT going to muggle doctor."

"No, I wasn't going in that direction, I just mentioned it because I only noticed your teeth because my parents work with them. I know there's a spell, isn't there?"

"It's a very painful spell, Granger."

"I'll be here with you."

"I don't want you to be here with me. I don't feel comfortable experiencing pain around other people."

"Well then maybe Monday when I'm away you can try it, only if you want to, it's just a suggestion. I'm leaving Hogwarts for a bit, probably until Tuesday afternoon."

"You're going away again?"

"I need to go to Australia so I can give my parents their memory back, now that the war is over."

"Do you love your parents?"

"Well, yes, why would I be going back for them if I didn't?"

"Your parents love you?"

"I'm pretty sure they do…"

"They're proud of you," Bellatrix said more like a statement rather than a question.

"Not right now, they aren't, they don't even know me," Hermione said giving Bellatrix a plate with a sandwich on it.

Bellatrix picked at her sandwich like a little kid, "I know what it's like to feel like that, with your parents I mean."

"Yeah?" Hermione turned around to make herself a sandwich.

"You know what boils me is that you do so much for someone and they don't even bloody care. The Dark Lord was the only person I looked up to, and I was still let down."

Hermione sat down and looked up, "I won't let you down, if you trust me."

"Trust you to do what?"

"Does it really have to be specific? Just trust me. But, I know it's going to take awhile, if it even happens."

"I don't even trust myself, Granger."

"Well, I think that's the first thing you need to work on then."

"I don't know how, or where, to start."

"That's why I'm here. Eat your sandwich. You're lucky you have me instead of Professor Trelawney."

"You seem to not like her very much, I can hex her for you if you'd like."

"No, Bellatrix, you're here to stop doing those things. But, I appreciate the offer."

Hermione cocked her head to the side exaggeratingly and smiled.

"So is this what the whole weekend is going to be like?"

"What?"

"Us talking?"

"Or you sleeping. Tomorrow I have the TV being shipped here."

"TV?"

"Another muggle device; it'll entertain you while I'm gone."

"Are you trying to convert me?"

"Only to the light side."

"Well you're too late; I can't be helped. I can't be reached. I can't be saved."

"Would you rather give up and go back to Azkaban?"

Bellatrix's face went even more pale than it already was, if even possible, "No one, _no one_, should have to ever go there, ever."

Hermione got up and put her plate in the sink and walked over to Bellatrix's side and just stared at her.

"What are you doing," Bellatrix asked nervously and irritated.

"Just trying to get a reaction out of you," she walked over to the couch and started playing on her phone again.

Bellatrix turned around to look at her, "What are you doing now? Texting that Weasley girl again?"

"Mmhmm," Hermione replied grabbing her book.

"It must be very frustrating having to stay away from your friends, especially your Weasley boyfriend."

"Ron is not my boyfriend," Hermione laughed, "And why do you keep bringing my friends up? I'm about to start badgering you about your friends, _Lucius_ and _Pettigrew_."

"I hope that's a joke. They're the two death, or ex, death eaters I hated the most. Good thing Lucius is stuck in Azkaban now, not that my sister might be happy about it."

"I thought you said no one should ever have to go there."

"Yeah, well, I change my mind a lot."

"Yeah, I've noticed you're a little Bipolar with your moods."

"Well I couldn't skip around happily while the Dark Lord was around, I had to bottle certain emotions and only let them come out at certain times. It wasn't my fault."

"You chose to be with him."

"And you chose to be with me, so I better not hear any complaining!"

"Have I complained once during our time together?"

"No, but you will," Bellatrix got up and started for her bedroom.

Hermione got up following her, "Don't walk off acting like nothing can ever change for you. You're here for a reason, so if you don't stop with the negative attitude, I'm going to have to change my tactics."

"What are you going to do," Bellatrix said lowly turning around. She walked up to Hermione an inch from her face, "You can't force me to do anything, and if you try it, I'll write the word 'filthy' on your other arm so that way your full name will never be forgotten."

Hermione let her emotions get the best of her and angrily shoved her away from her. She got her phone and book and went to the front door.

Bellatrix cackled, "Stupid girl, you're not going to win with a negative attitude, right? Haha!"

"I'm going to bed, I'll see you tomorrow," and with that Hermione gave her mock smile and shut the door.


	3. Chapter 3

**So I had to work today, and it was frustrating, as work sometimes is, and I felt better checking my email on my lovely iPhone during one of my breaks so see new reviews, favs, and follows! **

**This is the last chapter I actually have finished, which means I need to get on the ball! Good thing Thanksgiving break is coming up!**

**This chapter might seem a little rushed, Bellatrix and Hermione like each other from the start. So you don't have to wait that long.**

**Hope you're all having a great weekend! Think of all the positives!**

Hermione did feel stupid letting Bellatrix get her angry, but she was human, she couldn't be perfect. And she certainly wasn't going to hold in her emotions like Bellatrix does. _Maybe I was wrong, and stupid_, Hermione thought. _No, I can't give up. It's only been a few days. And she hasn't tried to hurt me physically, so that's a step in the right direction, right?_

Even though Bellatrix laughed at Hermione as she left, she felt bad deep down about upsetting her. She knew Hermione was right, about everything. She was just scared to admit it. She decided to fix her teeth, telling herself that was her consequence for upsetting the younger witch. She wasn't going to let Hermione change her, not unless she wanted to change. She wasn't lying when she told Hermione she didn't think she could change. After all, her lifestyle has been with her since she was born. But Bellatrix did often wonder what it would be like to be on the "good" side. Hermione was giving her a chance, and she needed to use it carefully. She just wasn't sure how. _I wish I had a bloody time turner_, Bellatrix thought, _I would go back and tell my stupid crazy old self not to say such things to the Granger girl. We're trying to have her on our side, not push her away, but it's so hard, I can hardly deal with all these new emotions. I really hope she does come back tomorrow_.

Early the next morning, Bellatrix got up to go to the bathroom and noticed someone lying on the couch. She thought it was probably Hermione, but she had to make sure. She yelled as she ran and threw herself on top of Hermione holding her tightly. Hermione awoke holding Bellatrix as well.

"Bellatrix, what the hell are you doing," Hermione said.

"Making sure you're not an intruder," Bellatrix said still holding on to her. _She's so warm. And we're hugging , kind of_.

"No one can come in this room except for me, you, Shacklebot, and McGonagall."

"You never know, a dark wizard or witch could come and use a dark spell," Hermione could see Bellatrix's exaggeration in her widened eyes.

"Look, I'm sorry I startled you, but can I go back to sleep now?"

"Wait, why are you here? I thought you went to bed in your dormitory."

"I did, but I came back a few hours ago. I couldn't sleep."

"They say when you can't sleep, someone is dreaming of you."

"Yeah, it's probably Ron," Hermione said with irritation in her voice.

"You aren't friends anymore?"

"We are, it's just complicated."

"He likes you."

"Yeah, that's the problem."

"I like you, a-as a person who supervises me."

"If your other personality heard you say that, she'd be yelling TRAITOR."

"I didn't mean to upset you earlier. Well, I mean, I did, but…. I ….wish I…. hadn't."

"Are you apologizing?"

"Trying to. It's hard to do things you're not used to."

"Hey, you fixed your teeth!"

"Yeah, the pain didn't last long."

Hermione realized they were still holding each other and let go, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to keep holding you down."

Bellatrix sat up, "Do you think….I mean…if I..if, if I want to….." Bellatrix felt herself tighten up and her eyes water. She sighed and got up to walk back to her room.

"No, go on," Hermione said sitting up. "Don't keep it in, Bella."

Bellatrix smiled inside at Hermione's use of her nick name. She stopped and just stood in place, her back to Hermione. She didn't know what to do. She was trying so hard not to say something bitchy and mean back to her.

"I can't," Bellatrix finally said, "I'm alone."

Hermione got up and walked over to her, "No, you're not. I'm right here with you."

"But I'm alone, emotionally. I have no one, no friends, hardly any family, and everyone hates me, and always will."

"I don't hate you, and we're friends, right?"

"How can you not hate me, Granger? After everything I've done?"

"Hatred does nothing but keep the heart cold. Love and forgiveness warm it, and keep it happy."

"I don't want to be alone anymore."

"You're not alone, you're making great progress, and I'm here supporting you, no matter what, okay?"

"But why? Why are you supporting me?"

Now it was Hermione's turn to not finish her sentence, "I just…well, it's complicated.."

Hermione carefully went to hold Bellatrix's hands. She felt their clamminess. They were cold and shaking, and tense. Nonetheless, Bellatrix let her hold them.

"Are your friends upset with you for supporting me?"

"No. They were confused at first, but I've been explaining to them. But I haven't told them anything you've told me personally. Remember, you can trust me."

Hermione made them breakfast before the new TV arrived.

"How did you learn to cook so well?" Bellatrix asked after they were done, "Did you parents force you like a house elf?"

"No," Hermione laughed, "My parents were gone a lot working, and we had a maid until I was 8 years old, so I was always helping her around the house, and I ended up being able to take care of myself when she stopped coming around."

"A maid?"

"Sort of like a house elf, except we treat them a lot better."

Hermione pulled out her laptop making Bellatrix give another confused look, "Let me guess, another muggle device."

"Yup," Hermione said turning it on, "Except everyone here is using them as well, and they are required for class. I ordered you one as well. It should be coming in a few days."

"I don't need your charity, Granger," Bellatrix barked, "Why do you insist on buying me all these things?"

"Because otherwise you'd be bored to death in here."

"I was bored to death for fourteen years in Azkaban and I lived."

"Well I'm trying to make this place _not_ be Azkaban. I'd think you'd be grateful."

"That thing looks hard to operate. The phone is hard enough."

"You'll get used to it. They're like spells, you just need to keep doing it until you finally get it. I'm sure you weren't expertly skilled in casting Crucio at first."

"What do you even do on it?"

"Socialize with people, listen to music, watch videos, read news, play games, write letters, a lot of stuff."

"What was that one you said, I'm not familiar with it?"

"Socializing with people?"

"Haha, no, the other one. Watching videos. What are videos?"

"Like moving pictures, only they tell a story, and they're like a bunch of moving pictures put together. You'll see."

Just then, a knock came at the door. Hermione got up to answer it and Bellatrix turned around in her chair to watch. Professor McGonagall was with two men who brought in a large square shaped screen and starting, as Hermione put it, "setting it up." They left in ten minutes with Professor McGonagall.

"Cool," Hermione said sitting on the couch picking up the remote, "Now we have more entertainment."

"Look," Hermione continued, "These are what videos look like." She turned the TV on and Bellatrix came and sat on the couch next to Hermione watching with curiosity. A commercial for Coco Puffs was on. Hermione started flipping through the channels trying to find something she think Bellatrix might like.

"Hey," Hermione smiled, "We have Show Time. You'll like this show. It's about a serial killer who kills other serial killers, and there's a lot of blood and stuff in it."

Bellatrix watched as Hermione got up to go to the bathroom. She saw on the bottom on the screen "You are now watching Dexter." When Hermione came back, she saw Bellatrix still glued to the TV. She sat down next to Bellatrix with her laptop, "So what's happening here?"

"I guess they're showing what happened to this man named Dexter when he was a little boy. His mother was killed with a chainsaw right in front of him, and he was left in a pool of her blood," Bellatrix explained excitedly.

"Yeah," Hermione replied not at all phased by Bellatrix's excitement for murder, "So basically that's why he is the way he is."

"You mean he wasn't born that way?"

"No one is born evil, not even Voldemort was born evil."

"….W-What about me?"

"You weren't born evil either. I'm sure you can remember being an innocent child. Why don't you tell me about your childhood?"

"Not now maybe some other time," Bellatrix said a little too quickly.

"Well what about your time with Voldemort?"

"You really want to know?"

"Yeah, I really want to know you, Bella."

Bellatrix bit her lip, smiling inwardly again at Hermione's use of her nickname, "Well, I met Voldemort, or Tom, when I was in my sixth year here at Hogwarts. My fiancé, Rodolphus, introduced me. Rodolphus was friends with that idiot, Lucius, who I hated even more than I usually would because he was dating my younger sister."

Bellatrix stopped for a few seconds and got that vulnerable look in her eyes as she continued, "Tom was very nice to me. He promised me a lot. He was patient, a great teacher….in the beginning. He had me kill a man for my first assignment. He said it would make my first torture easier. He said that I had to mean it when I said the spell, so he kept telling me all about why we were doing what we were doing. Why these people deserved what we planned for them. None of that never worked for me, but Tom helped me learn something else that helped from my past get my anger up."

"What was it?" Hermione asked now sitting legs crossed and facing Bellatrix on the couch.

"Well," Bellatrix hesitated, "Let's just say I was never a daddy's girl."

Hermione frowned and grabbed one of Bellatrix's hands, they were warm this time, and sweaty from nerves. Bellatrix cautiously laced their fingers together and held her hand very tight.

Bellatrix squeezed her eyes shut as she continued, "Anyways, that's…not important, right now. My past, to me, is worse than my time with Voldemort. In the end, when he came back, he was different. He didn't care about me, he didn't care about the fact that I had spent all that time in prison for him. He was definitely different, inside and out."

Hermione turned herself to face the TV, still holding Bellatrix's hand, and scooted closer to her leaning her head on her shoulder.

"You really don't think he was born that way," Bellatrix asked still looking ahead.

"No, Harry was told by Dumbledore about his past. Do you know about how he grew up?"

"No."

"His mother died while giving birth to him. His father was a muggle-"

"What? A muggle? Then that would mean he wasn't a pure blood and he was a hypocrite!"

"Yeah, kind of like Hitler."

"Who?"

"Nevermind. Anyways, his father didn't want him, so he was sent to an orphanage. Much like Harry, his magic burst out when he couldn't control his emotions. The other kids made fun of him and called him a freak. He had no friends. So he used his powers he discovered in himself to start paying them back."

"Revenge. That's all he ever talked about. Wow, that's crazier than I am."

"No one's crazier than you," Hermione joked nudging her side with her elbow. Bellatrix gave a little smirk while still watching the TV.

"Your hands are so warm," Hermione said bringing up her left hand to her cheek.

Bellatrix turned to see Hermione's eyes closed as she held her hand to her face. Bellatrix could feel the softness and the gentle way Hermione held and rubbed her hand. Hermione's phone went off and she let go of Bellatrix's hand. She got up and answered her phone walking away. Bellatrix watched her as she went and then turned back to the TV. _I want to be good for her_, Bellatrix thought, _I want to be good enough for her. I need to be good enough for her, because I have no one else_.

Hermione sat back down on the couch, lying sideways and facing Bellatrix with her laptop on her lap, her feet almost touching Bellatrix. Bellatrix turned and gave her a small smile. Hermione caught her smile and raised her eyebrows while smiling back, "Good to know you're in a good mood right now."

"Well of course I'm in a good mood, I'm here with you, aren't I?"

Hermione widened her smile, "Bellatrix Black."

"Don't act all surprised that I'm actually enjoying your company. Isn't this what you want, for me to get better and be on your side?"

"Is it what you want?"

Bellatrix turned her head and shut her eyes tightly. Hermione noticed and put her laptop on the table and went over to her.

"It's okay," she whispered as if talking to a scared and wounded animal. She took her hand again and rubbed her back with her other. Bellatrix relaxed at Hermione's touch and turned her face back around. She opened her eyes and look at Hermione, "I just want what you want, what you think is right, because you're the only person who's really stood up for me….ever, even after everything….e-everything…"

"Because I know there's good in you, there's good in everyone."

"Then why me? Why not someone else for you to help?"

"Because I care about you, I really care about you."

"But you might not always care about me."

"Bellatrix, there's nothing you can do to make me not like you, you've already done your worst, and I'm still here."

"Whenever I'm around you, I feel things I haven't felt before, or at least haven't felt in a very long time."

"Is that a good thing?"

"It's a great thing, you're a great thing. No, you're not a thing, and you're not a _mudblood_ either. Give me your wand."

"What?"

"I said give me your wand. Now!"

Hermione got up surprised at the sudden tone and gave Bellatrix her wand. Bellatrix pulled Hermione back down on the couch and lifted up her shirt sleeve to reveal the word she wrote in Hermione's forearm. She whispered a spell, and repeated it a few times until Hermione's scar had fully disappeared.

Hermione looked up at Bellatrix shocked, "I didn't know there was a spell to make scars go away."

Bellatrix smiled, "Didn't Dumbledore ever tell you that I was the brightest witch of my own age?"

Hermione smiled with tears in her eyes, "Oh Bella, I just wish I could give you a big hug!"

Bellatrix stood up and pulled Hermione up embracing her. Hermione was once again shocked at the displays of affection she was being given by the ex-death eater.

Bellatrix held onto her, "Will you always be my friend?"

"Always. I promise." Hermione felt Bellatrix's whole body release a huge weight of tension, she felt heavier now and put her head on Hermione's shoulder.

"You won't ever leave me," Bellatrix whispered.

"Never."

"What if I never get better?"

"I wouldn't be wasting my time if I didn't think you could, and I know you want to. And you've made so much progress since you came here. You're not the Bellatrix I met at the end of my fifth year."

"Because I can be myself around you, you accept me."

"And I don't mind all the playful sarcasm and that, it's just the killing, torturing, and mudblooding I don't like."

"Wha-That means that you _like_ me! For me!"

"Well yes, Bella, you're super funny! All the times I've heard you talk during the war, if my life wasn't in danger, I would've laughed at parts…instead of cried."

Bellatrix pulled back to look at Hermione, "I…." She let out a deep sigh, "I'm sorry. I'm….m'sorry….f-for….for making you cry."

"Really?"

"You're the only person I've ever apologized to, except the Dark Lord….but, I only ever apologized to him out of fear and respect. I'm apologizing to you because…because, well, now I respect you more."

"I hope you don't fear me more," Hermione laughed.

"I only fear that you'll leave me now."

"Which we've been through, and I'm not going to."

"What if I'm only good in here? What if I go out into Hogwarts, and into the world, and become bad again?"

"Why do you think you'd become bad out of here?"

"I don't know, maybe….maybe because there are people around who won't accept me, and it'll make me angry, and…"

"Well, that's why when you are allowed to go out and walk around Hogwarts, it'll only be with me by your side, and I'll be there with you, so you don't have to be scared."

"But…and no offense, but…what if you can't handle me?"

"You won't have a wand, you'll only have your physical strength. I'm not too worried, and no offense."

"Er, excuse me, but I think I'm stronger than you, if you recall our encounter at Malfoy Manor."

"You had a knife then."

"Well maybe I should stop biting my nails, and start sharpening them, just for show."

"Do whatever you want, I think you're perfect the way you are."

"Well thank you, love, now that I've had time to get my teeth fixed and straighten my hair, I think I'm fabulous."

"You're sounding less and less like Bellatrix Lestrange every minute."

"That's because I'm Bellatrix Black again."

Hermione and Bellatrix sat down on the couch and continued to watch TV the rest of the day. Hermione played on her laptop and Bellatrix played on her phone.

"There's a camera on here!" Bellatrix exclaimed.

"Yes, but remember, it's a muggle phone, so the camera won't take moving pictures, just stills," Hermione reminded her.

"Oooo," Bellatrix said holding it up to take a picture of Hermione. "Fascinating. I can capture one moment in time, forever."

She held her phone up so Hermione could see herself.

"I can take pictures on my laptop, too," Hermione said scooting over to sit next to Bellatrix.

A window popped up with Hermione and Bellatrix inside. Bellatrix had an odd expression on her face as Hermione smiled and took the picture, "Awww, our first picture together."

Bellatrix took another picture of Hermione with her phone.

Hermione laughed, "See, muggle devices can be entertaining."

Bellatrix took a third picture.

"Here, let me see it for a second," Hermione grabbed the phone and pressed a button so they could see themselves just like in the computer.

"Do we just want to be expressionless?" Hermione asked looking at her.

"Do you know how to make an insane face?"

Hermione and Bellatrix both made silly insane faces and took the picture.

"That was good, have you done many insane faces?" Bellatrix asked Hermione.

"No, that was the first time, I just thought of what you looked like in the Daily Prophet."

Bellatrix gave her a look and then smiled, "I like you, you challenge me."

"It's getting late, are you hungry at all for dinner?"

"I don't know, I usually don't have more than one meal in a day."

"Well that explains your skinniness."

"_My_ skinniness? Look at you, you twig!"

"Well, I guess I can't talk, but you do look less healthy than I do." _Although, it looks as all your weight has gone to those amazing boobs of yours_, Hermione thought_, Stop! Stop! Stop!_

"Go ahead and make whatever you want."

"Are you going to eat any of it?"

"Maybe. Probably since you cook so well."

"Do you want me to teach you?"

"How to cook? For myself? You're out of your mind, Granger!"

"Then what do you plan to do when I'm gone? You can't not eat."

"I can do whatever I want."

"No, as your supervisor, I'm responsible for you as a whole, and that includes your health, so you can either let me teach you how to cook now before I leave for Australia, or I can make you meals you can just heat up in the microwave, which won't be hard to figure out, BUT, I will teach you how to cook when I come back. Either way, you're learning."

Bellatrix gave Hermione a pouty look, "I won't know how to do it. You'll laugh at me, and make me angry and then I'll go on a tangent and you'll be upset and then I'll be upset for making you upset."

"Oh Bellatrix, you think too much, but I'm glad you care. Come here, I'll teach you how to make Spaghetti."

"What if I do something wrong the first time? I think you should teach me now, but still make me meals, and then teach me more when you come back. I'm afraid to do it on my own so soon."

"You know what, you're right. Fine, okay so come over here, it takes a while but it's mostly just waiting time."

After Hermione showed Bellatrix to cook the dinner, and they ate, Bellatrix decided to take a shower. Hermione left the suite to take a shower in the dorm bathrooms.

While putting her pajamas on and drying her hair, Hermione bumped into Ginny in the bathrooms.

"Hey, Hermione!" Ginny squealed hugging her. "I miss you, you're never around anymore."

"I know, I miss you all, too! But hopefully soon, we'll be able to come out of that room."

"I totally understand and trust you. Ron is still being stupid, and Harry's on the fence."

"I really appreciate it, Ginny, I just don't have time to deal with both Ron and Bellatrix."

"Yeah, Ron can be a hand full sometimes, a lot of the time."

Just then, Luna strolled in, "Oh hi Ginny. Hermione, I haven't seen you around in ages. Are you still staying with Bellatrix Lestrange?"

"She changed her name to Bellatrix Black, her maiden name. But yes, I am still staying with her. How have you been?"

"Oh good."

Hermione laughed awkwardly. "Well, I should be getting back, text me." She hugged Ginny and went back to Bellatrix's suite. When she walked in, she found Bellatrix lying on the couch sleeping. She walked over and bent down.

"Bella," she whispered. Bellatrix opened her eyes and mouth a little. "Do you want to go to bed? I can go back to my dormitory if you want." Hermione stood up and Bellatrix grabbed her wrist, "No, stay here with me." She pulled her back down.

"Why don't you go sleep in your bed?" Hermione suggested getting her to sit up.

"Will you stay with me while I sleep?"

"In your room?" She walked her to her bedroom and Bellatrix got under the covers.

"Come sleep with me," Bellatrix replied with a yawn. Hermione took her slippers off and climbed in bed with Bellatrix. She stared at her sleeping face that looked like a little child's. They both fell asleep within the hour.


	4. Chapter 4

**Apparently I had another chapter that I didn't know about, I thought I posted everything. Oh well, here you go then!**

**Things are going fast for Hermione and Bellatrix, but there will be complications, if not in this chapter, then others.**

**I hope you're all having a lovely holiday!**

In the morning around 10AM, Hermione heard a knocking at the door. She saw Bellatrix still asleep and got up to answer. She was met with Professor McGonagall and the minister.

"Hi," Hermione said awkwardly, "Come in, please."

"Were you sleeping, Ms. Granger," Professor McGonagall asked curiously.

"I was, sorry."

Professor McGonagall scanned the couch to see the blankets still folded, the pillows arranged neatly, and no body indent. She gave Hermione an awkward glance before looking over at the minister.

"We're just checking in to see how things are before you go to Australia tomorrow," the minister said.

"Actually," Hermione started, "Things have gotten a lot better with Bellatrix. I think that before she's allowed to go out into the rest of Hogwarts, even with myself, I'd like to invite some of my friends over to see how she deals."

"That sounds like a fine idea, Ms. Granger. What do you think, minister?" Professor McGonagall asked.

"Well, you are the one who's been with her the most, so, of course, we can allow that. You are now allowed to bring friends in the suite, only while you are around. They are not allowed without you, understand?"

"Yes, sir."

"If either of you have any questions," he gestured to Hermione and Professor McGonagall, "Just send an owl."

After they left, Hermione heard the bedroom door open slowly.

"So now you're going to start bringing your friends around," Bellatrix said.

"You say it like it's a bad thing," Hermione replied walking up to her.

"Is it because I'm boring?"

"No, Bella, it's because I think you're ready. This isn't about me. Well, I guess it will be nice to start hanging out more with my friends, but it'll be good for you, too, and remember, you're my first priority, and not just because you have to be, I can stop this anytime I want, but I won't."

"They won't like me, and I'll be casted aside to stay in my room awkwardly."

"I won't let that happen. I'm on your side, remember?"

"You might want me to stay in my room if I get out of control."

"Then we'll handle it like the adults we are, right?"

"I'm just afraid I won't be able to ever control myself if something upsets me. I know I'm being negative and you hate it, but I can't help it, and I'm telling you because I want to be honest with you. And because I don't know what else to do."

Hermione smiled, "You just don't see what I see. Just the way you're talking, to _me_, proves you can control yourself and be a better person than you were."

"But it's easy around you, you're not constantly glaring at me or telling me off about the things I've done."

"I know not everyone will be as forgiving as I am, but the people I choose to bring in to this room will not be allowed in if they aren't, I promise you that. As for when we start walking out into Hogwarts and the rest of the world, that's when we'll really find out. And you can't give up even if you have a break down the first couple of days, or even weeks. It takes time to get better, just like it takes time to get bad. Remember you weren't born that way."

"But…..oh, you'll always have an answer to everything I say, won't you?"

"I'll try to, and not just to console you either."

"You're leaving tomorrow."

"Yeah, missing classes won't count against me, thankfully."

"When are you leaving?"

"In the morning, probably around nine or ten."

"I won't be up that early by myself. Will you wake me up before you leave?"

Hermione smiled, "Of course. Well then, how about some breakfast, and then maybe I can invite Ginny and Luna over for a bit."

Bellatrix didn't say anything, but took another picture of her with her camera phone.

Hermione laughed as she turned to go to the kitchen. There was another knock at the door and Bellatrix quickly answered it as Hermione turned around. Professor McGonagall was there again with a large box. "I suppose this is for you, Ms. Black," she said handing the box to Bellatrix.

"Thanks Professor," Hermione shouted from the kitchen.

Bellatrix closed the door and put the box on the kitchen table, "How do I open it if I don't have my wand?"

Hermione came over with a knife and Bellatrix flinched. Hermione gave her an odd look as she cut the box open for her, "What was that for?"

"I just thought you were coming over for payback."

"Don't be ridiculous, Bella."

It was a laptop, exactly like Hermione's. Small with blue back of the screen she pulled up. Hermione's back was purple. Bellatrix didn't read the instructions and just pushed the large button at the top in the middle and it turned on. Hermione turned around, "See, it's not that hard, or maybe it is and you're just super smart."

"Probably the latter."

"Here, I'm being lazy, we're just having cereal today."

"When are you friends coming over?"

"I'll text Ginny and Luna now."

"What about Potter and Weasley?"

"Ron, definitely is not coming over today, and I think I'll wait on Harry as well, although Harry isn't as complicated about this whole situation as Ron is."

"They both hate me. You're best friends hate me, how can we ever remain friends?"

"Bellatrix, I'll handle it, don't worry. Honestly, though, can you blame them? Harry at least. Ron's just upset because I'm not spending my time with him."

"Light side, pah, full of hypocrites, supposed to be full of forgiveness."

"Everyone's a hypocrite. No one is perfect."

"I won't know what to do or say to your friends."

"Ginny is very conversational, and Luna is…well…she's a little weird, but she's very nice."

"Are they both Gryffindors?"

"Luna is in Ravenclaw."

"I suppose you don't have any Slytherin friends."

"Nope, but maybe you can invite your nephew, Draco, over one day, although I doubt he'd want to spend time with me."

"He probably won't come over; I bet his mother is upset with me."

"Then there's your answer, no Slytherins."

Bellatrix gave a pouted look and folded her arms, "So I'm being secluded from my own kind."

Hermione gave her a glare, "Your own kind is just like me and everyone else, we're all different and the same in the same way."

"That makes no logical sense, Granger. How can I just get better without the people I…the people I've known my whole life around to support me?"

"If your family and friends want to help support you, they can, but they need to go by our rules."

"So now I'm below you, like a slave or a house elf."

"You're _not_ below me, no one is below anyone. You need to get it in your head that we're all the same, with the same feelings."

"The Dark Lord said feelings are what makes a person weak."

"Yeah, look where he is now."

Bellatrix put her head down on the kitchen table in her arms, still staring at Hermione as she moved around the kitchen, her eyes following her every move.

"I'm not going to leave my family."

"I'm not asking you to."

"But what if they don't want the "better" me?"

"In the end, Bella, it's your decision."

"But what about you?"

"What about me?"

"You said you'd be around forever, that you wouldn't leave me. Would you willingly put yourself in danger and be around my dark family?"

Hermione stopped. Her head was down with her eyes closed. She was trying to think of the right thing to say when Bellatrix burst out, "YOU LIAR!" She got up off her chair and threw it across the room making Hermione jump and open her eyes as she lifted her head. She got an angry look on her face and walked over to Bellatrix who had tears in her crazy eyes.

"Will you be patient and let me think?! Calm down, Bellatrix. There's no need for a temper tantrum over this silly little thing and don't think your crocodile tears are going to get you pity from me."

"I'm not going to cry, I DON'T CRY! I haven't cried since I was a little child, just like your ignorant self! You don't know anything about me or my family!"

"Because you won't tell me!"

"Because you would never understand! You're just a stupid mudblood!"

Bellatrix's face immediately went from angry to scared as she put her hand over her mouth. Hermione's eyes were full of anger as she stared at Bellatrix, not letting her guard down, not giving into Bellatrix's apologetic facial expressions. Hermione's eyes were wide, and scaring Bellatrix. Bellatrix no longer had tears in her eyes as she pulled her hand away from her mouth and sighed. Hermione's eyes were still wide, but without the angry expression. Bellatrix started pacing around the room nervously biting her nails. Hermione went over and stopped her by putting her hands on her shoulders.

"Whatever happens," Hermione said to her, "I'll always be here for you, but only if you want me to be."

"But, my emotions, how can you tell when I go back and forth?"

"Trust me, I know when you're telling the truth."

"So…s-so you know I didn't really mean it when I called you…"

"It's just a stupid name. I know who I am. I'm going to go get Ginny and Luna now."

As Hermione turned Bellatrix grabbed her arm, "Wait, are…are you upset with me?"

Hermione didn't answer her question, but merely shrugged her off and opened the door, "I'll be back in five to ten minutes."

Bellatrix was upset, and not angry, but sad. Her stomach hurt not knowing Hermione's feelings right now. She sat down on the couch, got her phone out, and texted Hermione that she was sorry. She sat there in silence for ten minutes waiting for a reply. The door finally swung open and Hermione, Ginny, and Luna stepped inside. Bellatrix stood up and followed Hermione to the kitchen while Ginny and Luna walked around the living room.

"Did you get my text?" Bellatrix whispered to Hermione.

Hermione replied with a short and simple, "Mhm," and walked back out into the living room with Bellatrix following like a puppy dog.

Ginny and Luna were laughing when they walked in.

"Hermione, you need a video game system," Ginny told her. Her and Luna were sitting on the couch, Hermione sat in one of the one-seat chairs while Bellatrix sat in the other situated across from Hermione.

"So you only have internet and TV, you don't even have a DVD player?"

"We've only been here a few days, I just got the TV yesterday."

"Ron and Harry would be bored out of their minds in here."

"So what do you two usually do in here, then," Luna asked.

"Oh," Hermione started, "We do the usual, eat and sleep. Sometimes we watch TV and/or talk."

"Sounds boring," Ginny said flipping through the channels, "At least there are two of you though."

"Yeah, but I'm leaving tomorrow morning to go to Australia, so Bellatrix will have two days to be by herself."

Hermione looked over at Bellatrix who was looking at the floor.

"I like your dress, Bellatrix," Luna said lightly, "It's very original."

Bellatrix acted as though she didn't hear her and Hermione sighed loudly.

"Hey, guys, is it okay to ask a favor," Hermione said as she stood up and rummaged through her purse.

"Yeah," Ginny asked.

"Go to Hogsmeade for me and pick me up a Wii and six of those meals from the shop next to the leaky cauldron," she handed them money.

"Sure, but what for," Luna asked taking the money.

"Just for Bella while I'm gone, unless Ginny wants to help make some meals."

"Haaa that's a good one, me, cook for myself?" Ginny laughed.

"See, Bella, you're not the only one," Hermione said looking at her and seeing her head was up watching them. "Alright, text me when you get back to the castle, alright?"

"Will do," Ginny said as they left.

Hermione turned around to see Bellatrix getting up and walking towards her. She started backing into the wall when Bellatrix seemed to not be stopping, although Bellatrix's face had shown no sign of wanting to hurt her. Bellatrix put her hands on the wall on either side of Hermione and Hermione folded her arms looking away, "Yes?"

She heard Bellatrix take a big breathe and let it out, "I'm sorry."

"Oh? For what?"

"I'm sorry, for hurting you."

"Which time," Hermione looked up at her with her eyes full of tears.

"A-all of it. I really am. I'm stupid, and I need to start learning to think before I say and do things. I need to start trusting you, because you're the only one I have anymore. You're the only person I ever really had."

Hermione had tears running down her face and didn't try to wipe them herself for Bellatrix was already using her thumbs to wipe them aside.

"I know you care about me," Bellatrix continued, "I care about you, too. I love you, Hermione."

Hermione's face went shocked as she grabbed Bellatrix's wrists, "What did you say?"

"I _love_ you, _Hermione Granger_. More than anyone or anything else in this world. Do you know why?"

Hermione shook her head as more tears escaped from her eyes.

"I've never told anyone that I loved them: not my parents, not my sisters, not my ex-husband, not Voldemort, not _anyone_. You're the first, you're my first love, and I don't want to lose you. So please, _please_, forgive me, please don't be upset with me, please stay with me, because I need you. Because without you, my whole life is fucked."

"Oh, Bella," Hermione threw her arms around Bellatrix, "Of course I forgive you. I love you, too, and I'm not going to leave you."

"But I'm glad you did what you did, by being upset with me earlier, because I don't think I would've said all of that to you if you just let me off the hook so easily," Bellatrix said.

"That was my plan, and I'm glad it worked."

Just then, Hermione's phone went off, "That was quick."

Bellatrix got Hermione a few tissues, "Here, if they see you've been crying, they'll think it was because of me."

"It _was_ because of you, good and bad."

"I'm going to miss you when you're gone."

"Time will fly, trust me."

A bunch of obnoxious knocks came at the door and Hermione answered, "You were very quick."

"That's what she said," Ginny replied walking in with a bunch of bags.

"Who said that," Luna asked innocently.

"Never mind," Hermione said taking the drinks from Luna and setting them on the kitchen table, "We really appreciate you going out."

"We only got back so quickly because Ginny was walking so fast," Luna told her.

"Ron kept badgering us about you two," Ginny added.

"Oh god," Hermione groaned putting the food and drinks into the fridge, "What did he say?"

"Just that you're turning your back on all your friends and being brainwashed by Bellatrix."

"Yup, that's definitely what's going on. Jesus, I spent a whole year travelling around the U.K. with him camping; he's so stubborn. What did Harry have to say?"

"He kept telling him to let it go and trust you, because you're the smartest out of both of them anyways."

"Well if they could show me that they could behave themselves, I would have invited them over."

"You don't have to worry about us, Hermione; Luna and I can become Bellatrix's new best friends. I hope you like ham sandwiches and chips because that's all they had."

"That's perfectly fine," Bellatrix interjected, "Thanks for going out for me. Hermione showed me how to cook a little yesterday, but I don't think it was enough for two whole days."

"That's more than I know."

Ginny set up the Wii and they played games the rest of the day. Ginny and Luna were very interested in Bellatrix and asked her a lot of questions, most of them she answered with honesty, while some she just brushed off and said she'd rather not talk about. Meanwhile, Ron was blowing up Hermione's phone with numerous texts.

"Ginny, I'm starting to really hate your brother," she said.

"Which one," Ginny said not taking her eyes off the TV screen.

"Ron keeps blowing up my phone. I keep trying to tell Harry that he needs to handle him for me, but he says he can't force him to do anything, especially when he's angry and stubborn like this."

"Yeah, they're both annoying pussies."

"Like he can't even fucking tie his shoes by himself without me being there to watch him."

Bellatrix opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it and smiled.

"What," Hermione asked her.

"I was just going to say that a Crucio would be a one hundred percent guarantee for him to leave you alone, but then I remembered that we're trying to solve problems in different ways."

Hermione smiled, "Yeah, well maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea for Ron at the moment."

"Hermione," Ginny yelled still not taking her eyes off the TV screen.

"What? It's true. Damn weasel."

"I hope you're just kidding."

"I am."

"I'm not," Bellatrix said.

"I don't expect you to," Hermione said.

"Ron just needs to find more friends," Luna started, "He's been around you and Harry for so long, he doesn't know what it's like to have someone else around."

Hermione sighed, "Maybe I'll talk to him when I get back from Australia, him and Harry."

"Don't do anything you don't want to do," Bellatrix said.

Ginny and Luna left around 8PM. Hermione closed the door and walked over to Bellatrix who was still sitting in one of the loveseats. She kneeled down and held Bellatrix's hands smiling up at her, "You did very well today, I was very impressed."

"I like them. They're nice."

"I chose them because I knew they wouldn't judge you, especially Luna."

"She was…interesting, like you said before."

Hermione laughed a little, "I'm going to get ready for bed. Is it okay if I stay here tonight?"

Bellatrix nodded quickly with a smile.

After getting into their pajamas, Bellatrix and Hermione both sat at the kitchen table. Bellatrix was messing with her new laptop while Hermione was writing in one of her notebooks.

"Is that homework," Bellatrix asked looking over.

"No," Hermione said looking up at her, "Actually, I call it my Bellatrix Blog."

"Bellatrix Blog?"

"For everyday I've been with you since the war ended, I've written all my thoughts and whatnot in here."

Bellatrix looked over at it curiously with raised eyebrows.

"There are only four entries," Hermione continued, "It's hard to think that we've only been with each other four days and things have changed tremendously between us."

Bellatrix continued to stare at it.

"You can read it, if you like," Hermione said to her, "But, I think you should wait until I leave tomorrow. I was thinking maybe you could write replies, or your own entries, if you want."

Bellatrix didn't say anything, but went back to browsing on her computer.

"Er….does it bother you?" Hermione asked her.

"No, I was just thinking…."

"What?"

"Uh, I was thinking….we're both on opposites sides of trust kind of, or were. You trust me so well, with everything I say. How do you know I'm not lying and messing with your mind? You're not suspicious at all."

"Don't be upset, because it wasn't my idea, but Professor McGonagall told me the room has been casted with a truth telling charm. And so far, we've both been telling the truth about everything."

"Wait a minute, then how can you know if I actually trust you, now I know you're telling the truth."

"Do you trust me?"

"….Yes."

"There's your answer, apparently something's supposed to happen when we lie, and as far as I'm concerned, I don't see anything strange happening."

"Prove it."

"Uhm, okay…let's see. Two plus two equals six." Hermione's face turned green for a few seconds.

"Ohhhh," Bellatrix said pulling up the webcam on her laptop and switching it so Hermione could see herself. "Say that again and watch yourself."

"Two plus two equals six, Oh! Well, now we know now!"

Bellatrix flipped her computer back around as Hermione went back to writing. After a few minutes, Hermione got up and walked over to Bellatrix and put her arm around her.

"I'm gonna go take a shower and gather some things from the dorm, and then I'll be back, okay?"

"Okay," Bellatrix turned and smiled a little.

While Hermione was away, Bellatrix found her way onto the internet and was reading The Daily Prophet online. She was shocked to find an article about her and Hermione. It was short with little description of what was actually going on. At the end of the week of articles, there were five questions from the top five articles with either a thumbs up or a thumbs down from the editor. There was a question about the article of her and Hermione: Will Bellatrix (formerly Lestrange) Black be able to change from her evil ways? There was a thumbs down and Bellatrix clicked off the site immediately with a scowl on her face. She shut the computer closed and took a shower herself. She put her pajamas on and laid on her bed with her lights on, waiting for Hermione to come back. When Hermione did come back, she went into the bedroom and noticed Bellatrix's mood.

"What's wrong?"

"There was an article from The Daily Prophet online about us. It said I won't be able to change."

Hermione smiled and walked over to the bed sitting down on the side.

"The Daily Prophet is nothing. They don't know the real you."

"But a lot of people will read it, and…"

"Bellatrix, you were never like this before the war ended! You wouldn't have cared about what they thought!"

"Because I never had the pressure to change. Now I need to, I need to, because you want me to, and because I want me to."

Hermione put her hand on the side of Bellatrix's face and saw the tears in her eyes, "You really don't cry, do you?"

"I don't remember the last time I ever let the tears fall down my face." She grabbed Hermione's hand. "Will you sleep in here with me again tonight?"

"Of course."

"And you'll wake me up before you leave?"

"Definitely." Hermione let go of her hand and walked over to the other side of the bed and crawled in. Bellatrix turned over to face her. Hermione smiled at her. Her phone went off and she grabbed it to find a text message from Ron: How long are you planning on staying with that woman? Have you forgotten your friendship with me and Harry already? How come you invited Ginny and Luna over and not us?

Hermione sighed and rolled her eyes replying to him: I know for sure I'm going to be with her for the rest of the summer. No, I haven't forgotten our friendship, I miss you both. And I'm sorry, I didn't think it would be appropriate to bring you to meet her since you obviously still have anger.

Ron: Obviously? She's a Death Eater, Hermione! She tortured you! She carved Mudblood in your arm! She killed Sirius, and she tortured Neville's parents!

Hermione: I'm well aware of all of that. Ron, this is a second chance for her. Please understand and trust me. We need to learn to forgive. Hatred and anger is something the dark side uses, not us.

Ron: Whatever.

Hermione slammed her phone on the bedside table and fell back down on the bed.

"What's wrong," Bellatrix asked.

"Ron again. He's just so….ugh." Hermione put her hands on her eyes. Bellatrix laid an arm over Hermione and put her head on her shoulder, "I'm sorry."

Hermione sighed and turned the light off. She turned to face Bellatrix and snuggled more into her, "Everything's going to be okay, Bella, I promise."


	5. Chapter 5

**Whenever I write stories, I don't want them to end, I just want them to continue on and on, forever and ever (amen). But I already gave this story a name, and I gave it its name two seconds before I published it.**

**Now, all day I'm wondering why I have that theme song from that old show "Out of the Box" stuck in my head, and then I'm like, oh yeah….**

**Your reviews are fun to read :) **

Hermione woke up the next morning at 8AM. She gathered everything and turned around to look at Bellatrix who was still sleeping soundly. She walked over and lightly rubbed her arm to wake her. Bellatrix inhaled and opened her eyes slowly. When she realized Hermione was leaving, she turned to face her more and grabbed her hand.

"Promise you'll come back," Bellatrix said, almost as a command.

"Of course, Bella," Hermione smiled.

"Promise," Bellatrix repeated.

Hermione's smiled faded a little, "I promise. I left the Bellatrix Blog on the kitchen table for you. I also made you a playlist, and a note on how to work it."

"Playlist?" Bellatrix scrunched her eyebrows together. "_Another_ muggle device?"

"No, it's part of the laptop you have. It's music that reminds me of you."

Bellatrix's face fell to curiosity.

Hermione continued, "Feel free to text me anytime, and only call for emergencies. I'll be texting you. I should be back around Tuesday evening."

"I'm going to be awfully alone."

Hermione nodded, no pity for her, "Keep the TV on, it won't seem as lonely. Behave yourself, and soon you won't have to use the TV."

"Whatever," Bellatrix turned her back towards Hermione and pulled up the covers.

"I'll miss you," Hermione whispered as she hugged her. She apparated and was gone. Bellatrix grabbed her phone and sent Hermione a message: I'll miss you, too .

Bellatrix wanted to go back to sleep, but couldn't. She really wanted to text Hermione again. Positivity, Hermione had told her. Think positive. At least she's not stuck in Azkaban. As much as she would hate it, especially in the past before she came to stay at Hogwarts, she owed Hermione her life, and possibly even more. She stayed in bed staring at the ceiling for five minutes thinking about what all the students must be doing just behind those walls. Did any of them even know she was here? She knew Ginny, Luna, Harry, and Ron knew about her whereabouts. She wondered how loud the gasps would be when she finally was allowed to walk outside of the room; how intense the glares would be. She wasn't even sure if she should be allowed out of the room, whether she may have seemed to have gotten better or not. Who knows what random person or object could push Bellatrix to do. She had gotten off well with Ginny and Luna, but they were extremely kind and non-judgmental of her. Perhaps Hermione has paid them to act that way. Then again, wouldn't one of their faces have turned green? Or does it only work for her and Hermione? Her brain was whirling around with so many questions. She decided to finally get up and take a shower and start the first boring day without anyone to bounce her craziness off of.

Afterwards, she lazily dragged herself to the kitchen table where she saw Hermione's computer open and what seemed to be her Bellatrix Blog lying beside it. She decided to read the blog first, putting the other _muggle_ task off at the last minute. Perhaps she would read the blog, sleep, reply, sleep, possibly eat something, sleep, and then _maybe_ she would give the _playlist_ a chance. What music could possibly remind the silly girl of her?

She opened the first page:

_May 2, 1998_

_I'm probably going to regret this. I just think that, as part of the "light" side, I should try to help those that have been stuck on that dark path for so long. Ron and Harry are wary of my decision, but I couldn't help myself. I don't have much to say about the infamous Bellatrix Lestrange, or Black, right now. She tensely came with Professor McGonagall and myself to the ministry and we took her to her room. She didn't seem to care too much, but she wasn't as harsh as I was expecting. I couldn't blame her for being completely paranoid that we were only trying to take her back to Azkaban. I, of course, have never been, but I've heard stories. I wonder if Bellatrix was this crazy before Azkaban… Well, I guess we're going to find out, or not, we'll see._

_I have to help rebuild the school tomorrow, and I don't know when I'll go back, or what I'm even going to do when I go back. Professor McGonagall suggested I be a sort of therapist for her, but I'm not even out of Hogwarts yet. I'm just a 17 year old girl, who they all keep reminding is the smartest witch of her age, but that doesn't make me feel any better. But I asked to be the one to help her, so here goes nothing._

_There's nothing else to say, because nothing else has happened. So I'll stop here and write again when I've actually spent some more time with Bellatrix. _

_May 8, 1998_

_Bellatrix, oddly enough, didn't have too much difficulty accepting the cell phone I got her. I guess use of muggle things shows some improvement, right? She's still obnoxious, and mean, and even upset me right before I left to come back to the dormitory, but I should've expected it. She's Bellatrix Lestrange (Black). I guess it's just easier to not be as intimidated by her as I would be if she had a wand. She is sort of like a prisoner, or not so, but she probably feels like one._

_Bellatrix can't cook for herself, so I almost feel like I'm babysitting. They wouldn't let house elves come up to the room for fear of her killing them or something. She doesn't need a wand to cause harm, but yet they still allow little old me in here with her maniacal self. I'm still questioning whether this is even worth it at all. I feel bad feeling that way, but it's the truth. Bellatrix hates me, always hads, and always will, no matter what I do or say. I can't even sleep, maybe I'll go back and try to sleep on her couch, and then maybe she'll wake up and kill me with her bare hands. Okay enough with the negativity; it's just her mood swings, which is something I should look up soon._

_May 9, 1998_

_We have a TV now, thank god. That kept Bellatrix occupied. Still feel like I'm babysitting somewhat, I shouldn't be. I'm supposed to be talking to her, or having her talk to me, and we have been doing that. It just takes time, and it's sometimes awkward. I'm not trying to sound like I'm complaining. I enjoy listening to Bellatrix. She's a very interesting person, very mysterious. _

_Oh yeah, I also got her to apologize for being a bitch to me the night before. Well, I didn't make her, she kind of did it herself, which is a big deal for her._

_We talked about Voldemort being a hypocrite. She was surprised, and I wasn't surprised about her being surprised, because I knew he probably wanted to keep it a secret. She's like a little child. I keep telling her people aren't born evil. And she does have good in her, hell, she even used my wand to make my MUDBLOOD scabbing scar go away. Bellatrix Lestrange…Black, I need to get used to using the Black. _

_Bellatrix is coming around so well, despite her mood changes and bitchiness that if we didn't have the charm on the suite for truth telling, I'd be super suspicious and nominate her for best actress of the year._

_She's definitely a basket case. An emotional train wreck and I feel for her, she has no one. That's why I won't leave her. I keep trying to put myself in her shoes. But I doubt what I think is anything close to what she has to, past, present, future, deal with._

_May 10, 1998_

_I woke up today in Bellatrix's bed. Doesn't that sound awkward… she just randomly asked if I would sleep with her, literally. I knew she'd take offense if I'd said no, and I was very tired. But it was just like sleeping alone._

_I woke up and Professor McGonagall gave me a look when I told her I had just woken up and the couch was all nice. She probably thinks Bellatrix is seducing me and trying to brainwash me, which is actually the other way around. Kind of. I can't help myself, I'm actually really starting to like Bellatrix, but I feel like we're a patient/doctor sort of bunch. But I'm not a doctor. I'm NOT a doctor. I'm just a friend…. Just a friend…_

_I'm going to Australia tomorrow. Bellatrix seems like she doesn't want me to go, but whatever. It's not like I wouldn't be in class anyways. I'll admit, I will really miss her. I'm more excited about finding my parents again. I can't wait to tell them everything that's happened. And maybe, if pigs can fly without magic, the end of next week, Bellatrix might be able to come out of her room. She's like a grounded little kid. I don't think she'll be getting her wand back for at least a year, and by then, she'll have to have shown amazing progress and self-restraint. _

_Ron's being a dipshit. He just needs to stop, I totally understand him though. I wish he would at least try to see it from my perspective. I'm glad Ginny and Luna were so nice to Bellatrix, I'm glad I have them, because having two boys as my best friends won't always cut it. I love Harry and Ron to death, but I need some girls. Bellatrix helps with that somewhat._

_Bellatrix and I had another fight, because she went insane over me not answering a question right away, then she called me a mudblood, and it was just getting tediously annoying. She really felt sorry the second after, I could tell, but I wasn't going to let her get away with it. We got over it and talked, and she went all emotional and told me she loved me. I don't know if she means love as in a friend, or love as in…something else. I told her I loved her back, because I do, definitely as a friend, I'm not sure about the other thing…. But still, I think it might be a little bit inappropriate…to be getting so close?... but that's what she needs, is a friend. Someone who won't leave her the moment she throws something and screams bloody murder. It just makes me think of small Tom Riddle, all alone in the orphanage with no one understanding him, just…claiming he was different, though he was….Dumbledore should've gone to him sooner. Dumbledore should've done a lot of things….but this isn't a Dumbledore bashing blog, it's a Bellatrix Blog. My Bellatrix Blog. And I can't wait to come back from Australia to help her craziness more._

Bellatrix read through all four entries just once before replying. She decided to go down and reply to mostly everything Hermione said.

My Reply

The good part in me is hoping you won't ever regret this. Don't feel like you have an obligation to "save" me just because you feel bad. I don't blame your friends about being wary, they're just being smart. I don't think I was this "crazy" before Azkaban, but I was definitely as evil. My sister, Narcissa, has wanted me to go see a therapist plenty of times, but I refused because they're all just a bunch of quacks. They don't know me or what I'm thinking. I'd rather stay and talk with you.

I do feel like a prisoner, but a first-class prisoner. At least I have a bed, before I went to the room at the ministry, I don't remember the last time I slept in an actual bed. It feels like heaven sleeping in it. I could never kill you (with my bare hands). It does feel strange not having my wand, but I've gotten used to it. The only things I would use it for is to torture and/or kill you, but the whole reason of me being here is to not do things like that.

I'm glad you think I'm interesting and mysterious. I find you interesting as well, surprisingly. I am a good actress, but as you can see, I've mostly been telling the truth this whole time. You're the first person I've ever met that has given me a chance to… explain…. To try and understand me and where I come from, and why I am the way I am. Perhaps that's why I liked you from the start. You're not full of assumptions and you don't believe every little thing you hear and read.

I used to have my sisters sleep with me when I was younger, it made me feel safe. McGonagall is a nosy old woman. I obviously don't need to seduce you to get you to like me. We're both brainwashing each other, I believe. I think we almost spend too much time alone with each other, not that I'm complaining. Why would it be inappropriate if it can help me get better? Your parents are going to try and turn you against me. Weasley is a dipshit, I agree. And, I do love you. Definitely as a friend. Did my face turn green? Also, why does it have to be green (Slytherin), why can't it be red (Gryffindor). But I am starting to feel something more, and I don't know what it is, it's something entirely new to me. But I don't want to scare you away, so maybe I should repress it, or hold it back.

Bellatrix didn't reread what she wrote, just slammed the book shut and shoved it away from her. She wanted to text Hermione that she had read the blog and replied, but decided not to. She went to go back to sleep, tired from all the emotions that ran out of her onto the paper.

Meanwhile, Hermione had finally found her parents in Western Australia in Joondalup located in the Ocean Reef suburb. When she knocked on their door, though, no one answered. She didn't want to sit there looking suspicious, so she decided to wander around the city for a while. She ended up at the marina and stopped dead in her tracks when she heard her father's infectious laugh. She looked around at all the boats along the harbor, searching for him. When her eyes landed on her father helping her mother onto a medium sized boat, her heart soared and she remembered their boat trips when she was younger, before she knew about the world of Hogwarts, before she had to worry about anything except how late she'd be able to stay up, when they would be going to play at the park, and when she would go visit her grandmother for treats and interesting stories.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before walking over to them. She wasn't sure if she should talk to them first before reversing the spell or just do it. She decided that she wanted to just do it, so she made sure to hide behind another boat where no one would see her flip out her wand and mutter the reversal spell towards them. She noticed both her parents stand still for a few seconds before coming back to their senses.

She saw the confused look on her father's face, "Where….where are we?"

Hermione put her wand away and leapt out to run towards them, "Mum! Dad!"

Hermione's mum turned around and gave her a huge smile before opening her arms to her only child she had sorely missed. She picked her up and spun her around like she did when she was a little girl.

"My sweet darling, why are you here?" her mother asked her.

"Why are _we_ here?" her father asked.

"I can explain everything, but it'll take awhile," Hermione said to them, "I can only stay until tomorrow evening."

Her father hugged her and gestured to the boat they were on, "Is this mine?"

Hermione laughed, "No, I think you just rented it," her mother laughed along with her while her father gave a sad look.

Hermione led her parents back to their Australian house and explained everything: the reason why she had to erase their memories, everything about Voldemort, everything about camping with Harry and Ron, all the war at Hogwarts, the deaths, the horcruxes, and finally, she told them about Bellatrix.

"Hermione, I forbid you to continue this!" her father said getting up and raising his finger.

"Now, she said she has help from the teachers," her mother interjected, "If you wish to continue, dear, then go ahead, just be careful. The way you described her before the war ended scares us a little, but, after everything you've gone through, I think we should learn to trust your judgment, and support you whenever you need us."

Her father sat down defeated next to her mother.

Hermione smiled and hugged them both. They went through their house and decided they would move back home when Hermione had left. Hermione wasn't comfortable apparating them, and she wasn't about to waste 23 hours on an airplane when she could be doing so many other fun things with her parents. They decided to treat it as a mini vacation.

Hermione thought she should text Bellatrix now: I found them! And everything is going great! I hope you're not getting into too much trouble over there ;)

Bellatrix heard her phone go off. It was 2PM. She read the message and replied: Only in my dreams, I read your blog and replied, and then I went back to sleep, and I just woke up now. Thanks.

Hermione quickly replied back: Good. Go listen to the playlist.

Bellatrix groaned and got up. Maybe she would watch T.V. later. She was turning into a plain muggle, and she hated it. She went back over to Hermione's computer and read the note she taped onto the screen.

These are songs that reminded me of you.

Dark Side by Kelly Clarkson – Because like I've said, no one is born evil, and everyone has a dark side, and a light side.

I'm Yours by Jason Mraz – Because it's a fun, bubbly song that Ginny sent to me.

Leaving On A Jet Plane by Chantal Kreviazuk – Because it reminded me of me leaving and you being sad about it.

Wake Me Up Before You Go Go by Wham – Only because I love it, and it's fun, so maybe you'll like it; also, Luna sent this to me.

The Fighter by The Fray – It reminded me of you, well, you'll see why (as with most of the songs)

As Long As You Love Me by Justin Bieber – I'm super glad you probably don't know who he is, otherwise you'd probably make fun of me, and possibly hate me even more than you ever did.

Look After You by The Fray – Because I feel like I'm looking after you, obviously, and it doesn't bother me at all.

Fallin' For You by Colbie Caillat – Because maybe I am.

Between The Raindrops by Lifehouse Featuring Natasha Bedingfield – I just recently found this song and love it.

Purple Sky by Greyson Chance – Because I want you to know I'm not trying to change you, just trying to help, and I love you the way you are.

People Like Us by Kelly Clarkson – This song helps me get through the day, and I think it can help you as well.

Unwell by Matchbox 20 – One of my old favorites, it fits you perfectly.

A Thousand Years by Christina Perri – This shows that I won't give up on you, no matter what, as long as I'm alive, it would have to take a thousand years (which wouldn't happen because I'd be dead by then)

Catch My Breath by Kelly Clarkson – This was a last minute song I put on, not sure if it has anything to do with you. I'm sure you can find something to relate it to.

Use the mouse/arrow and click on the triangle pointing to the right in the circle, top left corner. The buttons on either side will go back and forth between songs.

Bellatrix listened to the playlist all the way through once, making a good hour go by. She repeated some of the songs she really liked, and wanted to make Hermione a _playlist_, but didn't know how.

She texted Hermione at 9PM Monday night, not caring that it was 4AM Tuesday morning where she was: I listened to your playlist.

Hermione woke up to the ding of her phone and read the vague text. She replied: And?

Bellatrix replied: I liked it. I want to make you one, but surprise, surprise, you're not here.

Hermione: I'll be back tomorrow evening, and it'll be earlier your time. Have you been eating?

Bellatrix: I ate twice today.

Hermione: Good. Keep it up.

Around 4PM on Tuesday, Bellatrix received another text from Hermione: I just apparated into London. Because of the nasty weather headed towards here and Hogwarts, I apparate to Hogwarts, and I can't get into Platform 9 ¾. So I might be coming back a little later than usual.

Bellatrix replied with a simple: Okay.

She went to sleep, for what was probably around the fifth time that day. When she woke up, it was nearly 5AM the next morning. The whole suit was dark as she got up and walked over to one of the windows to find it pouring down rain; the wind making the trees of the Forbidden Forest wave around like they were dancing. She tried turning a light on, but it didn't work. As a matter of fact, nothing worked. Everything was shut off and broken. Bellatrix went to get her phone, but it wouldn't turn on. She remembered Hermione saying something about charging it, but she didn't know with what. The computers were also not working. She stood in the living room for a minute, and then she started to panic. She believed that this was planned. They had wanted her to feel like she was back in Azkaban. She started to shiver, from nervousness and because she was getting cold. She didn't know whether she was angry or scared. Suddenly, she lifted the little coffee table and threw it at the door. She went over and pushed it out of the way and started banging on it and yelling. She stopped when she remembered no sounds inside the suit could be heard outside of it. She felt betrayed, and her mind was out of control. She wasn't thinking, and in the back of her mind, she knew she needed to stop and start thinking, but she couldn't. No one was around to care anyways.

She found her phone and threw it against the wall. She continued to scream as she went over and smashed the computers. She knocked over the T.V. The whole suit was a mess, and after she was done wrecking the things Hermione had gotten for her, she started crying. She was really crying. For the first time since she could remember, she actually had tears running down her face. She ran into her bedroom and slammed the door shut. She got under the covers and put her head under one of the pillows to stop her from making anymore noises.

Roughly ten minutes after Bellatrix's breakdown, the door to the suit slowly opened. Bellatrix took the pillow off her head and sat up with an angry glint in her eyes. Her lips were still trembling, and she still had some tears running down her face.

She heard Hermione's voice call out to her as she heard her walk through the rubble, "Bellatrix?"

Hermione opened her bedroom door and slowly walked over to the bed, "Are you okay?"

"No, I'm not okay! Why is everything shut off?! Where were you?!"

"Hold on," Hermione left and went into the utility room and turned on the backup power. She walked out and stopped surveying the suit and all the damage Bellatrix had done. She told herself she wasn't going to get angry. She walked back into the room, "Have you been…crying?"

"Yeah," Bellatrix said, "You made me cry."

"I didn't _make_ you cry. Look, because of all our muggle devices, the weather shut off the power, it wasn't anyone's fault but the weather. I'm sorry I wasn't back when you wanted me to be. Why on earth did you destroy everything?"

"Because I was mad! Because I was scared! Because I felt betrayed, and I felt stupid."

"You panicked and became paranoid. You still don't truly trust me, do you? You don't really believe I am on your side. What do I have to do to make you believe it, Bella? Just tell me."

Bellatrix turned herself on the bed with her back facing Hermione, "I don't _know_."

Hermione got up and walked over to sit next to her and held her hand, "I'm not too mad about all the damage, because we can easily fix it all within ten minutes. But you should've controlled yourself. I won't always be around to stop you, I can't be. That's no way for you to live your life. You should be able to live your life without me."

"But I don't want to. I want you with me. You're the only person who has accepted me, and I…I really do love you for it. I do love you. And it sounds weird, coming from me, because love was always forbidden where I was with…_him_. But…but your presence is just..doing something to me! I want to spend every moment with you, even if I slam doors in your face, and mock you, and argue with you. I want you to continue holding my hand, because no one else has because they actually wanted to. I want to hug you and hold you, and sometimes I wish I was the one taking care of you, because maybe then I wouldn't worry so much about my own problems. And I wish you could love me the way I love you. And I wish you wanted to do the things I want to do. Like sometimes….I wish you would kiss me, because sometimes I want to kiss you."

Bellatrix took a quick inhale and turned her head.

"Bella…"

"Nevermind, it's stupid, just like you said in the blog, we're like doctor and patient and it would be _inappropriate_."

Hermione scooted as close as she could to Bellatrix and grabbed her chin so they were both looking at each other.

"Bellatrix, I am _not_ a doctor!"

Hermione put her hands on Bellatrix's cheeks and wiped way the new tears falling, "I do love you the way you love me, I promise."

She leaned in and kissed her, feeling her tense up. She pulled back and whispered, "Don't be nervous. Let me love you, and you can show me how much you love me."

Bellatrix turned more towards Hermione as Hermione wrapped her arms around her neck. She leaned in and kissed Hermione back hugging her. After a minute, she rested her head on Hermione's shoulder, "I'm sorry for being stupid."

Hermione lay down on the bed bringing Bellatrix with her. She leaned over and turned off the light. Bellatrix lay down on top of her, snuggling like an upset child.

"We'll fix the damage tomorrow, just try to go to sleep, I know how good you are at it," Hermione said.

"Thanks for coming back," Bellatrix said, "That's the first time anyone's kept a promise they've made to me."

Hermione covered them up and kissed Bellatrix's forehead. Although she was super tired, she softly rubbed Bellatrix's back to help sooth her before she actually fell asleep. When she felt her breathing even out, she let herself fall asleep into her own slumber, and hoped that when she woke up, none of this would have been a dream, because like Bellatrix, she was experiencing the feeling of falling in love with someone for the first time as well, and progress or not, it made her feel invincible.


	6. Chapter 6

**Something I JUST realized, the year is 1998 and the songs in the playlist don't exist yet (or at least some of them don't), in the real world, and neither do cell phones, wii's, and laptops, IN THE REAL WORLD (or maybe they did, but they weren't used as much), but in MY world, my wonderful world of Bellatrix and Hermione, they DO exist, and they are used just as they are today.**

**ProudMarineWife: I was just going to go on about the PTSD Bellatrix will obviously have, with Voldemort, Azkaban, and…other things we'll get to. But thanks for reminding me, because I did forget a little bit about it! And I just thought of a way to help that tie into the other Bellamione stuff I already have written. 3**

**Dannielle (Guest): The Reason by Hoobastank is DEFINITELY a bellamione song. ^_^ I shall use it.**

**Lavender isn't dead. Neither are Remus and Tonks, but they'll show up later in the story.**

**Hope you're all enjoying the holiday season!**

It was 8AM and the light shining through the window wasn't what woke Hermione up. She felt a hard grip on her arm and opened her eyes to see what it was. Bellatrix was lying next to her on her stomach, her face away from her. She was gripping Hermione's arm very tightly and Hermione tried to pry her fingers away. It wasn't working, and Hermione was starting to really hurt.

"Bella!" Hermione yelled using her other arm to pound on her back.

Bellatrix woke up and turned her face, which was red, towards Hermione.

"Can you let me go, please?" Hermione asked.

Bellatrix slowly unraveled her fingers and pulled her hand away. Hermione rubbed her arm a little and scooted closer to Bellatrix.

"What was that all about?" she asked her.

"Uh, nothing….it was just a bad dream," Bellatrix told her.

"Your face is green."

"Ugh, God damn it!" Bellatrix got up and went into the bathroom.

"I'm not letting this go!" Hermione yelled to her. She got up and went into the bathroom after her. Bellatrix was brushing her teeth.

"I should probably keep some essentials here if I'm going to keep sleeping over," Hermione said, "But anyways…"

"S'not impowtant," Bellatrix said still brushing her teeth.

"It is if your face is still green."

Bellatrix spit out her toothpaste and got a cup for water, "Why don't you go get some of those essentials?"

Hermione just stood in the doorway.

Bellatrix looked back at her, "Go!"

Hermione jumped a little at the old Bellatrix coming back for a second, "You're not off the hook, when I come back, we'll go over your consequences for damaging everything, and then about trying to tear off my arm."

Bellatrix rolled her eyes and spit out her water.

"Hey!" Hermione walked over and gripped her arm hard.

"Owww! That hurts, _Granger_!"

"You deserve it, smart ass."

"Go to class."

"I'm not going to class today, I'm too tired and I can afford skipping again."

"You're turning into a horrible student; oh, and I bet they're going to blame me for it."

"No one can blame you for anything I do. I can make my own choices. I'll be back in a little bit. Try not to fall asleep again or destroy anything else."

Bellatrix was making mocking faces in the mirror and doing the talking motion with her hand while Hermione went to leave. Before Hermione opened the door, Bellatrix ran out of the bathroom and hugged Hermione from behind, "Leaving me again already?"

Hermione laughed and turned around, "Getting attached to me, are you?"

"Don't be more than fifteen minutes," Bellatrix said waving her finger. Hermione grabbed it mid-wave.

"Don't wave your finger around at me like you're the one in charge."

"Don't….make me have to wave my finger around like I'm the one in charge."

Hermione smiled and rolled her eyes before giving her a quick kiss.

"I'll be back soon," she said again closing the door.

Bellatrix let out a heavy and depressing sigh. She lazily walked back into the bathroom to finish what she had been doing. She wanted Hermione to come back, because she missed her and she hated feeling lonely. On the other hand, she wouldn't mind if the younger witch did take her time gathering her things. She wasn't looking forward to being asked more questions about her gripping Hermione's arm. It was one thing to have bad memories come back as nightmares; it was another thing to actually talk out loud about them, as if they really were real.

Meanwhile, Hermione was walking towards the Gryffindor common room entrance when Ginny walked out.

"Hey, 'Mione," Ginny said hugging her, "How did the thing with your parents go?"

"Good! I'm so glad to have them back; all that stress about them gone."

"Well, if you're headed to the common room, just a fair warning, Ron's in there."

"Right, thanks for the heads up."

"Hey, when can I come back over and spend some more time with you and Bellatrix? And Luna, she's a fun one."

"I'm hoping to at least get you, Luna, and Harry in by the end of the week; still not too sure about Ron. You'd think it would be the other way around with Bellatrix killing Harry's godfather and all."

"Yeah, boys, right? Well, see you later."

Ginny left and Hermione climbed through the portrait into the common room. Just as Ginny had said, Ron was sitting by the fire place with Harry, Dean, Seamus, and Neville. …._Neville_, Hermione thought as her stomach dropped, _how am I going to explain Bellatrix to him?_

She didn't want to seem like she was ignoring them so she took a deep breath and walked over ready for any interrogation.

"Hey guys," she said putting her hands on the back of the couch.

Dean and Seamus said their normal hellos. Harry got up and gave Hermione a hesitant hug, "Hi, Hermione."

"I've missed you guys."

"Yeah?" Ron said sarcastically.

Hermione just gave him a glare and looked over at Neville who was biting his nails and not saying anything.

"I can't stay for long, I.."

"That's not a surprise," Ron interrupted.

Hermione went to say something to him, but took a deep breath and continued, "I just came to get some things from my room."

She turned to go, but stopped when she heard Neville's low voice, "Hermione?"

She turned around, "Yes, Neville?"

He got up and walked over to her. Hermione tensed up feeling tears welling up in her eyes.

"Is it alright if we talk alone?"

Hermione nodded not allowing any tears to fall, "Sure."

Neville led her up to the boys' dormitory. It wasn't the first time Hermione had been in the boys' dormitory, but she was feeling rather nervous this time. Neville turned around to look at her with his hands in his pockets.

"I'm guessing you probably know that I know about you and Bellatrix Lestrange," Neville said.

Hermione opened her mouth to correct him that it was Black, but decided not to say anything before really deciding whether it was important this moment in time or not.

"I'm not mad, at you," he continued, "I mean, I _was_ mad, at first, at the whole situation. But I talked more to Professor McGonagall about it. A-and I know what you're doing is trying to help her. And I know that if my parents could think for themselves, they would be on your side. Just know that, it's gonna be hard for me when I actually see her. I'm sure it'll be hard for everyone, but I'm trying to have an open-mind. Unlike some people downstairs." Neville gestured his head towards the stairs, both of them knowing the reference was for Ron.

Hermione immediately hugged him, "I'm so sorry, Neville. I wasn't thinking, I wasn't thinking how this would affect you and I'm so sorry."

"No, don't be sorry. You're very brave, and I admire that. It must be hard having to deal, and always being away from the normal Hogwarts life. If you need anything, I'll do anything I can; just, I want to apologize in advance if I do or say something irrational."

"I completely understand. Being around Bellatrix is like being on an emotional roller coaster, but you get used to it after a while, and you learn new ways to cope. She's somewhat different in the suite she's holed up in, but I'm not too sure how she'll handle being outside of it. She got along fine with Ginny and Luna, but who doesn't?"

"Slytherins."

"She was a Slytherin once."

"Then I guess there's hope," Neville held Hermione's hands, "Hermione, don't let Ron bother you. He's just upset he doesn't get to see you as often, you know how he is. We've been trying to get him and Lavender back together, not to replace you or anything."

"No, I understand, I appreciate all you boys' acceptance; especially you."

"I'm just not sure if I'm ready to actually face her yet, you know? I'll end up saying something I'll regret, and doing something I'll regret, like I said."

"Well, I think it would be very beneficial for you to talk to her, but only when she's ready to give you a full apology, not that it's going to make your parents any better; it would be very beneficial for her as well I believe, and when I say apology, I mean REAL apology. That might take a long time for her to actually do, but for being with her for almost a week, by ourselves, I think maybe…it's possible. I just hope she doesn't fully resort back to her old ways once I take her out of that room. I'm afraid it's all going to be for nothing. I feel bad for not having faith."

"You're a human, it happens."

Hermione sighed, "Neville, thank you so much, for everything. Thank you for letting me talk to you about her. I haven't had anyone else to really talk to her about. It's all just business with McGonagall and Shacklebolt."

Neville walked back down to the common room while Hermione ran up to the girls' dormitory to gather some things. When she went back down, the common room was empty except for Ron. Hermione didn't know whether she should ignore him and leave or say something. Thankfully, he made the first move.

"Hermione," he said in a soft voice she hadn't heard from him since the war ended. He walked closer to her and she turned to face him.

"Neville talked to me about you and Bellatrix. And I guess if he can be understanding, then anyone can, including me, so I can only say I'll try, but I miss you."

"I miss you, too, Ron," Hermione dropped her things on the couch and hugged him, she continued as she pulled away smiling, "I promise I'll keep you and Harry more keyed into what's happening now that things are at a more scheduled pace."

"Sorry for being a jerk."

"I should've expected it.

They both laughed and walked out of the common room together. Ron went to his class while Hermione quickly walked back to Bellatrix's suite.

She walked inside and threw her bag onto the couch looking sideways to see Bellatrix still in the bathroom looking at herself closely in the mirror.

"Seventeen minutes and forty-three seconds," Bellatrix said. "Two minutes and forty-three seconds late, but I guess that's better than ten hours late."

Hermione got out her toothbrush and toothpaste and walked into the bathroom beside Bellatrix. When she silently took the cap off her toothpaste bottle, Bellatrix turned towards her.

"What's wrong," Bellatrix narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "It's that Weasley boy, isn't it? Was he bothering you? I'm going to have to put it straight through all your friends heads that _I'm_ the only one who is allowed to bother you from now on, or else."

Hermione spit her toothpaste out and got a cup of water, "You seem to be getting a little possessive there, Bella."

"There's no reason not to be. Now tell me what's wrong!"

Hermione put her finger up for Bellatrix to wait until she finished with her cup of water. Bellatrix grabbed her finger and forced it down, "If I can't wave my finger around, you can't!"

Hermione immediately put up her middle finger earning a groan from Bellatrix, "Tell me what's wrong, a quiet little mud…er…muggle-born is not one to trust."

"Does my face look even slightly green?" Hermione asked laughing, "Has my face even turned green once since I've been in here?"

"Yes."

"When?"

Bellatrix shifted her eyes.

"When we were testing it," Hermione told her. "One point for Hermione, zero points for Bellatrix, and we're going to get to the bottom of earlier later, but right now, _you're_ going to help me clean up all this mess."

"I don't clean," Bellatrix responded following Hermione out into the living room, "House elves clean. You, my dear, need to summon a house elf."

"House elves aren't allowed in your suite, Bellatrix. You're too dangerous, remember?" Hermione batted her eyes at her.

"So your high professors would rather risk the safety of their own students, then?"

"No, _I_ would rather risk my own safety and mental energy than allowing you to boss around one of our house elves who if it wasn't for, Hogwarts would have no food and would be disgusting and dirty."

Bellatrix didn't say anything, but laughed after a few seconds as Hermione went to get her wand.

"What's so funny," Hermione asked.

"I thought of a hilarious comeback, but it's inappropriate and uses the 'M' word you're not fond of," Bellatrix told her.

"It's probably not really that funny then. Pick the T.V. up."

"With what?"

"With your hands…"

Bellatrix stared at her confused.

"Put it back into its place, and then I'll repair it," Hermione said.

"But it looks so heavy," Bellatrix whined.

"Do it," Hermione pointed her wand at Bellatrix.

Bellatrix looked at her wand, "Or what?"

"I'll have to use the Imperio curse."

"You wouldn't. You can't. You've never used an unforgivable curse. You're an innocent, good-hearted Gryffindor witch. It would ruin your place in the Golden Trio."

"Stop trying to distract me and pick up the damn T.V."

Bellatrix groaned loudly as she went over and picked up the heavy T.V. and put it back in its place. Hermione repaired it and the coffee table.

"What else did you destroy?" she asked Bellatrix.

"The computers, and my phone, and the door looks a little chipped," Bellatrix told her.

Hermione repaired the laptops and Bellatrix's phone. After repairing the door, she turned around and put her wand to her chin in a thinking position and stared at Bellatrix.

"I'm surprised you didn't rip up the Bellatrix Blog," Hermione finally said.

"Me too," Bellatrix responded. "I wrote you back if you want to go read it." Bellatrix sat down lazily on the couch.

"No, I don't think so at the moment," Hermione said grabbing Bellatrix's arm and dragging her to the kitchen table.

"My, Granger, you really have some guts ordering an ex-death eater around."

"You can really learn a lot in just a couple of days." Hermione went to her bag on the couch and got out another notebook that looked a lot like the Bellatrix Blog except it had a different color cover. She sat down next to Bellatrix and opened it to the first page and wrote "Bellatrix's Goals" at the top. Bellatrix read it and scoffed, "The only goal I have is to get out of this bloody room."

Hermione handed her the pencil, "Then write that down. Write down some more goals; try to come up with at least five. If you don't mind, I'm going to use your shower. And don't think they have to be things that you think I would only approve of, these are _your_ goals. I'll go over them with you when I get dressed." She walked away gathering her bag and went into the bathroom leaving a surprised and a bit abashed Bellatrix staring at her one goal. _Four more goals_, she thought, _what else do I want to do_? _What else do I NEED to do_? _They can be whatever I want_? Bellatrix smirked as she started writing her second goal.

Hermione came back out all dressed with her hair already dried after a half hour, "Got any more goals, then?"

Bellatrix pushed the notebook towards Hermione as she sat back down next to her.

Bellatrix's Goals

1. Get out of this bloody room.

2. Get to second, third, and home with Granger.

3. Get my wand back.

4. Talk to my sister.

5. Never go back to Azkaban.

"Well, these are good, Bellatrix," Hermione said turning the paper over and writing something else on the top of the page, "I think it's quite possible that you'll be able to accomplish all of these."

"Even number two?" Bellatrix asked surprised.

"Sure, if you're nice."

Bellatrix continued to stare at Hermione as she wrote more down on the back of the paper. When she was finished, Bellatrix looked it over.

Hermione's Goals for Bellatrix

1. Sincerely apologize to Neville Longbottom for torturing his parents, Frank and Alice Longbottom.

2. Sincerely apologize to Harry Potter for killing his Godfather, Sirius Black.

3. Sincerely apologize to Ron and Ginny Weasley for burning down their home.

Bellatrix looked over at Hermione, "What's all this 'sincerely' nonsense?"

"I want you to only apologize to them if you really mean it; not just because I want you to. When younger children hurt other children and their parents tell them to say sorry, it's ridiculous because they don't really mean it, which means they will probably do it again. I'm not rushing you either; these are serious things you need to really think about."

Bellatrix looked over at the paper.

Hermione continued, "You had prisoners that were held at the Malfoy Manor, right?"

"Uh huh."

"How many times a day did you use Crucio to torture them would you say?"

Bellatrix got this insane smirk on her face for a few seconds before answering, "Roughly ten times I'd say was the average."

"Okay, then I'm going to add another goal."

4. When I have my wand, have the average of using the Cruciatus Curse be zero.

"How am I supposed to get my frustrations out if I can't torture people?" Bellatrix asked raising her hands off the table.

"How are you getting them out now?"

"Well…I sleep them off if I have any, but I don't really have a lot because I only talk to you, and you're not as irritating as I thought you'd be."

"That brings us to the next thing I wanted to talk about, your arm gripping."

Bellatrix squeezed her eyes shut and put her head on the table.

"I know they're flashbacks. I'm not stupid, it's clearly obvious. Now I know why there are rips in the bed sheets. I'm not going to force you to talk about _anything_, but in order to get better and get out of here, you're going to have to face your fears, and I'll be right here with you when you do."

"You are NOT going to force me," Bellatrix said lifting her head up.

"No, I just said I won't.."

"We CANNOT talk about these things. To talk about them will make them reappear and happen again, just like when you say, or even whisper, the Dark Lord's name."

"That's just a bunch of silly rubbish. I never believed that and I never will."

"You're so optimistic, but you have nothing to be scared of, do you?"

"I am scared. I'm completely scared for you, and for your future. I don't want you to go back to Azkaban. I want you to be able to live your life, like you never did before. I want to prove to the magical world that people as dark and twisted as you can be healed, just like anyone else."

"W-what if I just write them down?"

"Write what down?"

"My flashbacks, o-of…of _Azkaban_."

"You'll have to end up reading them out loud at some point."

"Why?!"

"Because I believe it'll help!"

"But what if it doesn't? What if it brings back more memories and I end up more fucked than I already am?"

"Then we'll try something else, we won't give up! You have to at least try, Bellatrix. I know you can do it, you don't give yourself enough credit. If you can hold in and bottle up all those crazy emotions, you can certainly let them go. They don't control you, you control them."

"I-I can't do it."

"That's okay. We can wait until you're ready. And if that takes days, weeks, months, even years, I'll still be here. You were there for fourteen years, it's going to take time, and I understand that, Bella."

Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's trembling and clammy hand. She was whiter than usual, "Can we talk about something else," she sighed.

"Of course. What do you want to talk about?"

Hermione got up and led her to the couch.

"I'm really tired, but I don't want to sleep."

"Are you afraid?"

Bellatrix just looked up at her with wide eyes.

"I'll be here with you the whole time if you want to take a nap," Hermione said turning the T.V. on.

"Will…will you hold me?"

Hermione smiled and put a pillow on her lap. Bellatrix laid her head down and Hermione covered her up with the green and silver blanket.

"Hermione," Bellatrix said in a small voice.

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad I have you. I'm glad I have you to take care of me."

Hermione bent her face down to Bellatrix's ear, "I'm glad I have you to take care of," she kissed her cheek.

Just then, she saw her phone light up with a text message from Harry.

"Did you read the Daily Prophet today at all?"

Hermione replied, "No, I haven't gotten around to it yet, why?"

"Rodolphus Lestrange has broken out of Azkaban and is said to be on his way here, to Hogwarts, to take back Bellatrix."

Hermione's stomach dropped as she read text over and over again. She wasn't going to wake Bellatrix for this. She wasn't even sure if she should tell her. This may be the first real fork in the road for Bellatrix though; her first real choice to make: stay here with Hermione and get better, or go away with her ex-husband and continue to wreck havoc on anyone who crossed her angered path.

Hermione started crying silently. Her constant sniffing woke up Bellatrix from her quick ten minute power nap. Hermione quickly wiped away her tears as Bellatrix turned herself around to look at her.

"What's wrong?" Bellatrix asked with her eyes wide again.

Hermione decided to just tell her, "Your ex-husband has broken out of Azkaban and is said to be on his way here to get you."

"Ugh," Bellatrix turned back over, "Tell him to piss off."

"What?"

Bellatrix turned back over, "Well you didn't think I was going to really go off with him, did you? My, Granger, your face looks like a muggles when it's seen a ghost."

"I just thought you'd be happy to leave, if he actually found a way in to get you."

"No." Bellatrix turned back around and pulled the covers up more, "I don't want to go back to that life. I'd rather stay here with you."

She closed her eyes again and Hermione started crying only from happiness this time. She stared at the once dark witch whose face was as pale as the full moon, just as it should be.


	7. Chapter 7

**This chapter is going to be a test of how much typing hurts my right wrist (and it already hurts). I got bit by a stray cat and ended up in the ER, thankfully I am not turning into a werecat (as far as I know).**

**I stole a nickname in this chapter (and future ones) from PerfectPride's Impossible fan fiction, because I just love it, I'm sorry, I'm a thief. **

**While going through my iTunes for Bella's playlist for Hermione, I didn't want it to be THAT cheesy, so I skipped some of the songs I thought would be perfect, but then later in the day, I was on YouTube listening to Kyle Landry's piano cover of The Fray's You Found Me ( watch?v=NFMnqlu6il4) and it just made me want to go back and add the other cheesy songs.**

**Also, I was watching Bellatrix scenes from Harry Potter 6 and she's so fucking crazy. Don't worry, crazy Bellatrix WILL show herself in my story; she's just so coped up with Hermione in that suite, but being crazy won't mean she won't love and care for Hermione like she does, she just needs to go crazy sometimes. We all do. **

Hermione knew Bellatrix's power nap would be quick. She looked down at her face after an hour or so to find an odd expression on her face.

"Bella," Hermione shook her shoulder to wake her. She saw her slowly open her eyes still with the same expression on her face.

"Nightmare," Hermione asked her.

"I could see it," Bellatrix whispered, "that _dark_ cell…"

"Good thing I woke you up on time before you saw anything else."

Bellatrix sighed, "My life is over."

"What," Hermione smiled, "Bellatrix, stop being melodramatic."

"No," Bellatrix turned over with her head still on Hermione's lap facing the ceiling, "I have no friends, no family… I can't, I _don't_ want to go back to those I was with before. And I'm sure my sister, Narcissa, isn't too happy with me. She must know where I am. My other sister, Andromeda, hates me. No one's going to accept me, no one does."

"Pish posh, Black," Hermione put her hand on Bellatrix's cheek, "You're making progress, people will accept you, your sister will forgive you, your other sister will come around, now that everything has changed. And you have me. We're friends, right?"

Bellatrix shifted her eyes to her and held the hand that was holding her cheek, "Just friends?"

"Maybe more. You're so different here inside this room. A week ago, I bet you would have never thought you'd be sitting here with me like this. _Me_, a mudblood."

Bellatrix closed her eyes, "I was so stupid, a follower. A coward."

"It's just the way you were raised," Hermione told her, "I understand, but you've gotten better, in a very quick amount of time. Has it even been a week since you've been here?"

"You must have some extra magical powers brewing in the juice I drink," Bellatrix smiled so the younger witch knew she was just making a joke and not really insinuating Hermione putting some love potion in her drinks.

"And look, now you're using all kinds of muggle devices; I was very surprised you even knew the connection that was your second goal and baseball, a muggle sport."

Bellatrix smirked, "I don't really know what all the bases mean; I just know the general reference."

"Well," Hermione smirked back, "There are only so many girls in Gryffindor, so I've learned a bit from all those hormonal boys. First base is kissing, second base is caressing, third base is oral sex, and home is all the way."

Bellatrix looked over to find Hermione blushing as she finished her sentence.

"Well, _we've_ already been to first base," Bellatrix said, "And I'm sure caressing doesn't mean just hugging or rubbing someone's arms or cheek, facial cheek."

Hermione continued blushing, "Unfortunately, I don't have a lot to caress, unlike you."

"Oh don't be like that, little babe," Bellatrix waved her hand around to dismiss Hermione's remark. "You're a perfectly fine young woman anyone would want to ravish."

Hermione still continued blushing extremely red, but smiled at Bellatrix's new nickname, which sounded much less formal and sweeter than Granger.

Bellatrix looked up again at Hermione, "I don't know why you seem so shy about all this; you're the one that started this whole thing."

"What," Hermione laughed, "You cornered me and confessed your undying love."

"You confessed it back," Bellatrix argued.

"You confessed you wanted me to kiss you."

"And you did it."

"And you _liked_ it, and did it back."

"You haven't given up on me yet."

"You haven't given me a reason to."

"You're so fucked up to think the way you do."

"And you're so fucked up, period."

Bellatrix smirked as she got up to sit next to Hermione and wrapped them in the Slytherin colored blanket, "What are we watching?"

"I don't know. Some stupid soap opera, full of drama, and if you want to even know what's going on, you'd have to start watching the entire show from the very beginning."

"So it's nothing I need to pay attention to, then."

"Nope."

They sat there in silence for a few seconds before Bellatrix responded, "Now what do we do?"

Hermione turned and pushed Bellatrix down onto the couch climbing on top of her.

"Who's bipolar with their emotions, now," Bellatrix said.

"Shut up," Hermione responded before leaning down to place her mouth against Bellatrix's, her long hair providing as a curtain for them. Bellatrix snaked her arms around Hermione to hold her close while kissing her back. She caught the opportunity to use her tongue as a tool of exploration inside the young witch's mouth. Hermione used her own and reciprocated back.

She pulled back after a few seconds, "Oh my god, do you feel that?"

"Feel what," Bellatrix gasped.

"Everything; all over my body!"

"I can't feel your body, I can only feel my own which feels like it's been taken over by some magical power only your smart ass can produce."

Hermione smiled and leaned down to kiss her again. She hugged her and kissed her cheek and worked her way to her ear whispering, "I'm so in love with you, Bellatrix, and there's _nothing_ that can ever make me change what my heart feels for you."

Bellatrix's eyes welled up with tears, "Stop it, you idiot, you're going to make me cry again."

Hermione lifted her face up and Bellatrix pulled her back down into a hug so she couldn't see her begin to let the tears fall.

"No one has ever loved me like you do," Bellatrix whimpered.

"Not even Rodolphus," Hermione asked pulling up to look at her.

"Certainly not him. He was nothing but a way to keep up our name. He never loved me, he just used me, and I just used him."

"He's going to try to break into the castle, isn't he?"

"I don't know why."

"Ginny read another article in the Daily Prophet. A lot of the Death Eaters are looking for you to be their new Voldemort."

"Well, I'm flattered, but I have no intentions on killing Potter, anymore at least."

"What about ridding the world of muggles, muggle-borns, and half-bloods?"

"You've changed my mind about that entirely. I don't want to have to kill you. I don't want to have to lose you. You're still all I've got right now. I don't trust anyone else."

"What if he does come here?"

"He can't get in here; only you, Shackle-tins, and Mc-stern face can."

"But what if he does? He knows dark magic."

"You don't have any trust in your school?"

"I guess I'm just scared for you."

"Don't be scared for me."

"But what if he takes you away?"

"He won't because I'll tell him I'm not going."

"But what if he forces you, Bellatrix?"

"He won't. I'll kill him with my bare hands; it's been a while since I've gone full Bellatrix Lestrange."

"No you won't! I'm going to go talk to Professor McGonagall about this."

Hermione got up off Bellatrix.

"Wait," Bellatrix grabbed her wrist and looked up at her with uncertainty in her eyes.

"I won't be long," Hermione said pulling her wrist away, "Text me if you feel anxious."

"I feel anxious right now."

Hermione smiled as she patted her head and went to go open the door.

Bellatrix sat up, "Hermione."

Hermione stopped and turned around.

"I want to make _you_ a playlist," Bellatrix said, "But I don't know how."

Hermione walked over to the kitchen table, grabbed her laptop, and sat back down next to Bellatrix and explained to her how to add songs.

"You have over 2,000 songs on here!" Bellatrix exclaimed.

"Good, it'll keep you busy while I'm gone," Hermione got up again, "Just look at the names, and if the name interests you, listen to it, if you like it, add it. When I come back, I'll listen to them and read your reply to my blog. I'll be back in a bit."

The door shut and Bellatrix looked back over to Hermione's songs which were all listed in alphabetical order.

Hermione speedily walked through the hallways, down the moving staircases and straight to Professor McGonagall's office. She thought she might be exaggerating the whole thing, but she'd rather be safe than sorry, especially when it came to a situation with Bellatrix involved.

"I was expecting you, Ms. Granger," Professor McGonagall said as she walked into her office.

"So you've read the articles in the Daily Prophet, then?"

"Yes, and I presume you have as well."

"No, actually, I've just been told about them from Bellatrix, Harry, and Ginny."

"Then you haven't read all the details; Hogwarts is much more safer and guarded as it has ever been, and we have no need to worry about the recent escape of Rodolphus Lestrange."

"But even Bellatrix, herself, got into Hogwarts, what's supposed to be the safest place there is," Hermione started.

"As I said, Hogwarts is much more safer right now, Ms. Granger."

"But did you check the vanishing cabinet? The room of requirement? Did you check the secret passages that lead from Hogwarts to Hogsmeade?"

"Ms. Granger, I'm telling you, we have things under control! Your only job is to keep watch on Ms. Black, and let us handle the rest."

"But what if he gets into her room? She said she'd kill him with her bare hands, and there's only so much I can do if she wasn't kidding, and I'm not too sure whether she was or not at the moment."

"You are not to interfere if he does indeed enter Ms. Black's suite. You shall leave immediately, by yourself, if Ms. Black has decided to fight him. If she wishes to follow you, she may."

"But what if she does fight," Hermione said more to herself than Professor McGonagall.

"We'll make decisions as things happen. Now I suggest you go back to Ms. Black and use your time wisely with her if you're not attending your classes."

Hermione sighed, "Okay." She turned around and grabbed the door handle when Professor McGonagall called out, "Hermione."

People always have something else to say, Hermione thought as she turned back around.

"You've done, and still are doing, much more than enough," Professor McGonagall assured her in a less stern voice, "Try not to worry too much, and thank you for coming in with your concerns."

Hermione gave her a small smile, "Thank you, professor."

As she walked out, she decided it wouldn't hurt to go see Harry and Ron in the common room since she expected to be in the new Headmistress' office for longer than she was. She found her two best friends in the common room, and she hugged Harry and Ron before telling them what Professor McGonagall had told her.

"Well at least they don't have dementors patrolling the grounds," Ron said, "Those things really freak me out."

"I think they would freak Bellatrix out as well," Hermione said, "I'd probably have to keep the window shades down."

"How are things with Bellatrix," Harry asked.

"They're okay," Hermione said nodding, "Touch and go. I want to see if you two, Ginny, and Luna want to come over after classes tomorrow."

"Sure, we can come over," Harry said, he looked over at Ron who had a scared expression.

"She scares me though," Ron said.

Hermione gave him a pleading look.

"Come on, Ron," Harry said, "She can't be any scarier than a spider."

"Her crazy hair is like a spider with a million legs!"

Hermione laughed, "Not no more; she's fixed it a little. It's just got some waves in it, and her teeth are fixed; her nails aren't as long, so she does look like a normal person despite her entire wardrobe being black or dark green."

"Ginny said her room is Slytherin themed," Harry said.

"Yeah, but it doesn't make a difference because she doesn't care. Maybe I'll change it back to Gryffindor and see what she says."

"Ugh," Ron groaned, "How long do we have to stay?"

"At least an hour or two. And I'm hoping that it'll go good, so I can invite you over again Friday evening and the weekend."

"So you're trying to get us to be her best friends now? She needs someone of her own kind, someone Slytherin like Malfoy or Pansy Parkinson, yeah, Pansy Parkinson would be good, her and Bellatrix are both girls."

Harry and Hermione gave Ron a look.

"What," Ron asked.

"We're trying to get her to like other houses and people, too, Ron. We don't want to be like Voldemort. We want to accept everyone."

"First house elves, now Bellatrix Lestrange. I'm not befriending any gigantic spiders if that's your next move!"

"I wasn't planning on it, and it's Black now, Bellatrix Black."

"What's up with Bellatrix," Ginny said walking in.

"I was just talking to Harry and Ron about coming over tomorrow after class, you're coming too, and Luna," Hermione told her as she sat down.

"Well okay your highness," Ginny said looking at the two boys, "Ron you look like shit."

"Shut up," Ron barked.

"He's just worried about Bellatrix," Hermione told her.

Ginny waved her hand at him, "She's not scary, at least without a wand she isn't, right, Hermione?"

Hermione elbowed her, "She's fine. Maybe if things go good, I can bring her here next week, or bring in Seamus and Dean."

"What about Neville," Ron asked.

"Neville is a different case," Hermione sighed, "I have to wait until they're both ready to see each other."

"Will you hold my hand, Harry, when we go in?" Ron said grabbing Harry's hand.

"No!" Harry pulled his hand away as Ron laughed.

"If you want, you can bring Lavender with you," Hermione said.

"That's a lot of girls," Harry said.

Ron counted in his head, "Two boys and five girls; this might be fun!"

Hermione got up to leave, "I'll text you all after class and meet you here, okay?"

They all agreed and Hermione was off to go back to the suite.

Bellatrix was still sitting on the couch with Hermione's laptop when she walked in.

"Are we hopelessly doomed," Bellatrix asked when she heard her come in and close the door.

"McGonagall assured me that we're safe and not to worry too much about it," Hermione suggested going over to grab the Bellatrix Blog and sit back down on the couch next to her.

"Whatever."

"I think I'll read and reply to this before I go to bed. I can write in it every other night and you can write in it the nights I don't."

"Yeah yeah, here," Bellatrix handed her laptop back so she could go through her songs. Hermione set it on the coffee table and scrolled through it as Bellatrix shyly leaned her head on Hermione's shoulder.

Hermione smiled as she read, "Are you going to explain why you chose them for me? Or was it just a rushed assignment for you?"

"No, I can explain, I'm not incompetent," Bellatrix sat up straight before leaning forward again to look at the list.

Bellatrix's playlist for Hermione and her comments are as follows:

As Long As You Love Me by Backstreet Boys – I wanted one like the song you had before, but didn't want to chose the same one, but found one of the same name.

With A Little Help From My Friends by The Beatles – Because the only reason I do get by is from help, the only help I get from you.

Love Has No Pride by Bonnie Raitt – Because it shows your blood doesn't mean anything to me anymore, and I mean that in a good way.

Just The Way You Are by Bruno Mars – Because, to me, you're perfect, inside and out, and I still wonder how my life would be if I ended up with that Trelawney character.

Accidentally In Love by Counting Crows – Because I didn't plan to fall in love with you, and I never thought it would ever happen, ever, but it did, and I don't regret it.

Thank You by Dido – Because being in here sometimes makes me feel like I'm just in a huge amount of trouble, and everyone hates me, but you come around and make everything better.

I Touch Myself by Divinyls – Now that I do, but maybe I'll start when you're not around.

Light My Fire by The Doors – Because you light my fire, baby.

Can't Help Falling In Love With You by Elvis Presley – Like us, fools rush in, but whatever.

You Found Me by The Fray – Literally and figuratively.

I'm In Love With A Girl by Gavin Degraw – Wants to make love when I want to fight, so perfect.

Sweet Child O' Mine by Guns N Roses – You're like a child, but you make me feel safe, and I feel like you're mine now in a way.

The Reason by Hoobastank – Defines us perfectly.

Your Body Is A Wonderland by John Mayer – Not that I fully know, but I'm sure it is, and I don't want you thinking any less of yourself anymore.

When You Say Nothing At All by Ronan Keating – Because just your presence makes me feel better.

I Want You by Rubylux – Because I want you, duh.

Hermione continued smiling, "I could say that a few of these are a tad bit inappropriate, but they're from my iTunes, so I guess it's okay."

"Does it meet your standards?"

"Of course it does, I'll listen to it between classes."

"Well if we're not going to listen to it, what are we going to do now," Bellatrix asked seductively.

Hermione giggled, "Before we do anything, I want you to know I invited Ginny and Luna to come back over tomorrow evening, Friday evening, and the weekend, along with Harry, Ron, and Lavender."

"That's a lot time for us not to be alone," Bellatrix pouted, "And who's Lavender?"

"A girl that fancies Ron, and stop acting like a teenager, they're only going to be here for an hour or two each night."

"Well if any of those boys or that Lavender girl brings up my past choices and gets me angry, I'm isolating myself in my room."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"It's better than you killing them with your bare hands, right?"

"Not actually, it's not."

Hermione smiled and giggled at her, "It's so funny and weird to be around you when you're calm and not trying to kill someone or something and going crazy and yelling at the top of your lungs. I think the last time I saw you give your evil stare was before the war ended."

Bellatrix turned slowly towards Hermione giving her best evil stare possible, but Hermione continued laughing.

Bellatrix grunted, "What's your problem? You were scared to death of me before!"

"You had a wand and a knife back then, and things were different; I hardly knew you."

"Well I'm very dangerous, and none of this should be a laughing matter, especially to little girls like _you_."

"Like me?"

"Uh huh," Bellatrix leaned more towards Hermione forcing the younger girl to the other end of the couch.

Hermione was blushing again, not knowing if it was from Bellatrix's closeness or because she was actually afraid Bellatrix might do something rash. Bellatrix's face was super close to Hermione's with squinting eyes and lips in a thin straight line that could even make Professor McGonagall proud.

"You wouldn't do anything," Hermione said carelessly, "If you did, you'd go straight back to Azkaban."

Bellatrix knitted her eyebrows together and widened her eyes, "That would destroy your soft soul. Wouldn't you have feelings of guilt and sorrow that you couldn't even reach me when maybe, just maybe, you're getting so close to?"

Hermione stared at her with her own sternness, "Yes, because I'm not a monster, I would cry for you and think about what I could've done and what I should've done every night before I go to sleep."

"It wouldn't be nearly half as bad as my life."

"No; it wouldn't."

"Because instead of just having to endure sharing a dark, cold, damp cell with soul-sucking dementors, never knowing if it's day or night, the only other feeling besides the numerous insects crawling all over my body would be the chilling wind coming through the barred window, but deep down….deep down I would be thinking of you, and how I let you down….just like I let everyone else down."

"But you won't let me down."

"Don't get your hopes up."

"I won't. If I wanted to get my hopes up, I would wish for every single horrible thing you did to have never happened."

Bellatrix gave Hermione a very mean look as she continued, "But sadly, we live in a world where even the greatest magic can't turn back time, especially now since all the Time-Turners have been destroyed. So instead of constantly _thinking_ about the past, I believe you and I should both confront it once and for all, when we are ready, so that way we'll be able to look ahead to our futures without having to worry and watch our backs for old demons we think we can't defeat."

Bellatrix continued to stare at Hermione with her old evil stare, her fingers twitching maddeningly.

"And you can stare at me like that all you want," Hermione said with a small smile, "You can call me horrible names, threaten me, destroy the room, even get physical with me, since you don't have your precious wand to torture me with, but I won't stop, I won't give up on you, not until I die. You say that I'm the only thing keeping you safe, but you're the main reason I'm here. I feel like this is what I was meant to do; and maybe I'll fail, but I'm at least going to try. You're not intimidating, at least right now you aren't. Things will get rough, but I'll be right by your side, no matter what, no matter _what_."

Bellatrix's face softened a little, "It's so easy being in here, no one else will ever be as crazy as you. No one else will tell me these things, so I'll have no choice but to…"

Hermione interrupted her, "No! You have choices. Yeah, a lot of people out there will criticize you and not believe anything you say, but you need to learn to control your emotions. They don't know you, so why should you care what they think? I don't even know you, why should you care what I think?"

Bellatrix made her lips pouty, "You're special. And I'm supposed to impress you, you're my _supervisor_."

"But I want you to get better because _you_ want to, not just because I want you to. Do you want to get better?"

Bellatrix whispered very softly so Hermione had to strain her ears, "I just want the people I love, my family, to love me for who I really am."

"I think you need your family around to support you. I'm going to see what I can do."

"No, then everything will be ruined! They might not accept you, and then I'll be thrust into the middle and end up going even more insane and killing you all!"

"You're over-thinking it, Bella. We'll take it one step at a time."

Bellatrix stared at her with glossy eyes.

"Okay," she finally sighed and pulled Hermione onto her lap, "We can do this."

"_We_ can," Hermione smiled hugging her.

Bellatrix smelled in the scent of Hermione's hair. She started rubbing her back and immediately felt the younger witch let out a sigh of relief and her body let out all the tenseness as she rested her head on Bellatrix's shoulder, her face facing her. Bellatrix moved Hermione's long hair off her neck and started placing soft kisses on it and slowly started to suck.

"Bellatrix, no!" Hermione pulled away, but Bellatrix was gripping both her arms, "_Don't_ give me a hickey!"

"Why not? Are you ashamed of me?"

"No, I just don't want to have to answer any questions from my friends."

"Hmmph, whatever, how about I give you one on your arm where MUDBLOOD used to be, it'll be like a dark mark," Bellatrix smiled sweetly and seriously.

"I'm not your follower, and what's up with your death grip," Hermione struggled against Bellatrix.

"You said I could get physical with you, what's your problem?"

"I never said I wouldn't fight back."

Bellatrix loosened her grip and then tightened it again when Hermione tried to get up.

Hermione laughed and rolled her eyes, "You're ridiculous. Are you hungry? Of course you are, you haven't eaten all day."

Hermione finally got up and walked over to the kitchen while Bellatrix fell back down on the couch and hid herself in the blanket.

"Don't you go falling asleep on me," Hermione called, "I need you to eat something, then maybe I'll put a movie on for you while I reply to the blog."

"You treat me like a wounded animal, and a little child," Bellatrix said pulling the blanket off her face.

"Because you kind of are."

Bellatrix made a face before putting the blanket back over her.

Hermione made them both potato soup, and got Bellatrix to eat a bowl of it. They both sat down on the couch with the T.V. and Hermione getting ready to reply in the blog. She decided that tomorrow, in between her classes, she would try to find Draco, and possibly see if she can reconnect Bellatrix with her family. It was a scary thing to think about, but she was ready to do anything in order to make Bellatrix more comfortable and able to cooperate more.

"Are you going to class tomorrow," Bellatrix randomly asked.

"Yes, I really need to go back," Hermione replied, "I only have two classes, and an hour in between them."

"Are you going to come back here?"

"Uh, I was thinking about maybe seeking out Draco…"

"Draco? Why?"

"Because you said you need familial support, and I don't know what else to do about that besides talk to him, and maybe he can talk his mum, your sister."

"Well, this will be interesting."

Hermione sighed and looked away wanting to tell Bellatrix she was just trying to help, but decided not to say anything. She was a little doubtful it was going to work out well, but she decided that if she could be on good terms with Bellatrix, then Draco shouldn't be any harder to reach.

Bellatrix let out her own frustrated sigh then draped her arm around Hermione and pulled her close to her, "Don't do anything you don't want to do, especially if it's for me."

"But I want to, I want you to be happy," Hermione mumbled.

Bellatrix rested her head on the younger witch's, "I'll never understand why."

_Me neither_, Hermione thought.


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm so sorry it took so long to update. You'd think I would've found time to update during the holidays and breaks, but apparently not. It seems to be easier once I have a set schedule. I really miss Bellatrix and Hermione. I also found a mistake I had in another chapter, something about the Leaky Cauldron being in Hogsmeade, but it's not, Harry said it's in London, the third movie, "The Leaky Cauldron, that's in London." **

**Yeah, the one in London, not Detroit. **

"Do you ever wonder what the world would be like if there were none of these damn rules," Bellatrix suddenly asked Hermione. They were lying backwards on Bellatrix's bed staring out the window at the stars that shined down on them.

"What damn rules," Hermione smirked and looked sideways at Bellatrix.

"Like…killing people. What if I could have killed people and have gotten away with it?"

"Well, you kind of did, in a way, for a while."

"What if I could get revenge on everyone who hurt me, and not suffer any consequences? What if I never went to Azkaban?"

"Things would definitely be different. We might not know each other; we would probably not be here right now."

Bellatrix scrunched her eyebrows together and continued to stare at the stars, "Hermione?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad I suffered the consequences. I'm glad I'm here with you; your presence relaxes me in a way nothing and no one else can, ever."

Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's hand, "Remember these thoughts and feelings. When the time comes for you to be able to leave this room, and to leave this school, you'll need these memories."

Bellatrix's face softened as she squeezed Hermione's hand. Hermione squeezed back before getting up to turn over to the other side of the bed, "I think I'll read the blog tomorrow, I'm so tired."

"Are you going to bed already," Bellatrix asked watching her set her alarm.

"Yeah, I need to be up early for class," Hermione said placing her phone on the bedside table and getting under the covers, "You going to stay up?"

"Yeah," Bellatrix continued to stare out the window at the stars, "I'm not tired."

"That's a first," Hermione said sleepily closing her eyes and dozing off.

Bellatrix stayed up most of the night watching the stars. She sat up on the bed and looked out the window for a bit, and sometimes glanced at the sleeping Hermione she now realized she held much care for. _Would all these feelings go away_, Bellatrix thought, _if I suddenly went back to the other world I used to live in? What if I'm a fake? What if I really don't care for Hermione? What if the second I get my wand back, the second I get out of this stupid room I go mad again?_

Bellatrix got tears in her eyes and tried very hard not to let them fall down her face. She was shaking a little and held her fingers up to eyes until the moisture was gone. She had no real confidence in herself. When she was with Voldemort, it was all fake, false hope. With Hermione, she felt something more, but she couldn't be too sure about it.

An owl came pecking at the window with a letter attached to its leg. Bellatrix couldn't open the window, but no matter, the sound of the bird woke Hermione.

"Hmm," Hermione got up off the bed and waved her wand at the window to allow the bird inside. She shut the window as Bellatrix detached the letter. On the front of the envelope read, "_My_ Bellatrix."

Bellatrix continued to stare at it.

"Well," Hermione said with a bit of fear in her voice, "What is it?"

Bellatrix turned her back to Hermione and ripped the letter open.

_My dear Bella,_

_I'm sure you have heard now of my escape from that hell you and I both despise. I am also aware that you have probably heard of the nonsensical rumours of my plans to break into Hogwarts. I have heard you are "in care" of the ignorant and cowardly Minerva McGonagall and the disgusting filth of a mudblood, Hermione Granger._

_I feel for you, my Bella. The rest of the Death Eaters and I are waiting for you to find your way out so we can finish the Dark Lord's work._

_Write back as soon as you are able, and do not fret, this ink is readable for yours and my eyes only._

_Yours,_

_Rodolphus _

Bellatrix read it over again a few times silently and sighed as if she were relieved.

Hermione looked out the window to see the sun beginning to rise. She wanted to ask Bellatrix what the letter contained, but decided it was best to give her some privacy for once and went into the kitchen to make breakfast.

Bellatrix stood with the letter still in her hand and thought about what she should do. Would Hermione believe anything she told her since she had no real proof? What about the green face? She couldn't keep anything from the nosy little Gryffindor leaning against the kitchen table across the living room to see if Bellatrix had decided to come out from her hiding place.

Hermione turned back into the kitchen and strained her ears for any sound of squeaking floors.

_Well if she wants to bloody know, she'll bloody well ask_ Bellatrix thought finally walking into the kitchen to join her.

"Here," Hermione said throwing a plate in front of her as she sat down.

"Toast?" Bellatrix asked as Hermione walked towards the bathroom, "Is this all?"

"All I have time to make," Hermione shouted to her, "I'm going to take a shower and go to class."

Bellatrix placed the letter on the table and started eating her toast.

When Hermione was ready to leave, she walked out of the bathroom and saw Bellatrix on her hands and knees rummaging through the lower cabinets.

"What on earth are you doing?" Hermione startled her.

"Looking for glass to put my juice in!" Bellatrix exclaimed, "You've left me dry!"

Hermione rolled her eyes and walked over opening one of the top cabinets and handed her a glass. She turned around and saw the letter on the table with scribbles that made no sense at all. Bellatrix sat back down at the table and watched as Hermione kept glancing back and forth between the letter and the table top.

Bellatrix sighed impatiently.

"Well," Hermione finally said, "Guess I'll go then."

"Do you want to read the fucking letter?"

Hermione stopped and turned around, "Read what? It's just scribbles."

"Don't be so daft. It's obviously had a spell put on it for my eyes only."

Hermione's eyes got wide, "Ohhh, of course, I don't know why I didn't think of it. My mind's been somewhere else…."

Bellatrix gave her a weird look.

"Do you want to read it to me," Hermione asked, "Hurry up, I might be late for class."

"It's not that important," Bellatrix said turning around to dismiss her, "I'll tell you later."

Hermione walked over and stood behind her wrapping her arms around her and said in a teasing voice, "Are you sure?"

"Yes! Now get out!" Bellatrix yelled at her but immediately grabbed her hand and squeezed it to let Hermione know she didn't mean any harm by her words.

Hermione slowly let her go, "Okay, I'll text you later."

"Good luck with Draco," Bellatrix called, "he was always a stubborn little git."

And with that Hermione went out the door and on her way to class.

She told Harry, Ron, and Ginny she would meet up with them later because she needed to go find Draco. Harry shrugged it off while Ron scoffed. Ginny was more understanding, and Hermione told her after the two boys left how thankful she was to have another girl to talk to.

"It's just that my whole time here at Hogwarts has been with those two boys," Hermione said walking with Ginny to the courtyard where they heard Draco hangs around lately.

"Yeah, good thing I'm here," Ginny laughed, "What with Bellatrix, you'd go mad in days."

Hermione stopped walking when she spotted Draco standing with a few other Slytherins.

"Sometimes I think I already am," Hermione said, "I'll catch up with you later, Gin."

"Good luck!"

Hermione sighed deeply before walking over to Draco. She saw his two friends send a glare her way when they saw her causing Draco to turn around.

"What, Granger," Draco snapped.

"I've just come to talk to your about your aunt," Hermione said trying to hold her willingness to snap back at him.

"I've heard you got her locked up in the castle somewhere, trying to _save_ her. You're wasting your time."

"I just wanted to know if you'd like to come visit her."

"Why would I want to visit _her_? She's a downright loony, even more so than Lovegood. She'd probably be better off in Azkaban with my father."

"I don't think anyone would be better off in Azkaban, Draco. She needs you."

"Well I don't need her! Whatever has she done for me; that wasn't pulling my hair, bossing me around, and ridiculing me? I don't need this. Good luck, you're going to really need it."

And with that, Draco and his friends walked away leaving Hermione alone in the courtyard. She went back into the castle and to her next class. She sat down at one of the tables where Harry and Ron were seated.

"So, how'd things go with Draco?" Ron asked.

"Bad," Hermione said leaving it at that. Harry gave her a worried expression seeing the pain etched in Hermione's face.

After class, the trio went to the common room.

"Do you still want us to come over tonight," Ron asked.

"Of course," Hermione said, "It'll get my mind off of everything going wrong right now."

"Hermione," Ginny said walking over and wrapping her arms around her, "Don't get upset, it'll be alright, it's been alright, right?"

Hermione had angry tears forming in her eyes as she rested her head on Ginny's shoulder.

"You're such a perfectionist," Ginny laughed, "You're doing fine, Draco's just a little bitch. Let's go find Luna and Lavender and head on over there. I bet Bellatrix will think we're having some kind of converting intervention for her."

"But that's what I DON'T want!" Hermione yelled, "She needs to be around people she loves and knows, too, but who? She has no one, and no wonder she's so fucked up!"

"She has you, Hermione," Ron said walking over to her and Ginny.

Hermione shook her head.

"Look, it's just one person, Hermione," Harry said getting up to join them, "Malfoy's just upset about his father and everything else. Give him some time, I'm sure he'll come around; family sticks together, right?"

Hermione wiped her eyes and put on a fake smile, "Okay, let's go find Luna and Lavender."

Bellatrix was patiently sitting in the suite waiting for Hermione to arrive back with the group. She was nervous because she was expecting Draco to show up, but her heart sank when she didn't see him after Hermione closed the door after the others. She folded her arms and sat back in the couch glaring at the TV.

"Hey Bella," Ginny said walking around to look at her, "My, you're looking a little…dark there."

Luna carelessly plopped down next to Bellatrix folding her legs up onto the couch and picked up the remote, "This is a very odd mechanism. Ron, Ginny, I think your father would be interested in this."

"You were bloody here the other day, and you're now just realizing this," Bellatrix snapped.

Luna placed the remote back on the table and sat back giving Bellatrix a small smile.

Hermione waved for the others to sit down before asking Bellatrix, "Something wrong?"

Bellatrix shifted her eyes to see Hermione staring at her. She could feel her face getting hot, and kept telling herself in the back of her mind not to say anything she'd regret.

"You asking me?" Bellatrix spat, "Why would it matter?" She sat up on the edge of the couch and squeezed the ends before getting up to walk into her bedroom and slam the door.

"Do you guys want some drinks?" Hermione walked into the kitchen to get some refreshments for her friends and saw the letter for Bellatrix again. She snatched it and went back into the living room.

"Here you go," she sighed, "I'll be back, just feel free to make yourself at home." She walked into Bellatrix's room without knocking.

Bellatrix was sitting at the desk with her hands on top picking at each other. Hermione could see the beaten down expression Bellatrix wore in the mirror. She walked over to her.

"Is this what's got you upset," Hermione held up the letter.

Bellatrix looked sideways, "No, you can throw that away."

"I'd really like to know what it says."

"It doesn't fucking matter what it says!"

"Then if this isn't why you're in a rotten mood, then what is?"

Hermione could see Bellatrix's eyes gloss over with tears as she turned her back on her. Hermione put her hands on her shoulders and slowly wrapped her arms around her until they were cheek to cheek.

"Please," Hermione whispered, "You can trust me, I swear it."

"I…."

Hermione was going to tell her to "go on," but decided not to push her; instead giving her hand a squeeze.

"He didn't come. Draco didn't come. I told you, I have no more family."

"Oh, he's just a prick. I'm going to write to his mother tomorrow."

"NO!..."

"What on earth are you afraid is going to happen if I do?"

"She won't care.."

"Don't be afraid of rejection, Bellatrix. You have to at least try… Hang on, was this letter from your sister?"

Bellatrix looked down at it, "No." She told Hermione to release the spell put on it so she could read it herself. After she read it, Hermione angrily looked back at Bellatrix, "When were you planning on telling me about this, or were you even planning on telling me at all?"

"It's..I don't know, okay?!" Bellatrix raised her voice, making the others in the living room raise their eyebrows at each other.

"Were you planning on writing him back," Hermione asked trying to get calm again.

"NO! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU I'M DONE WITH THE SODDING IDIOT?!"

"Keep your voice down," Hermione gritted her teeth angrily pulling up a chair next to Bellatrix and sitting down.

"Oh, sorry," Bellatrix sarcastically replied, "I wouldn't want your friends to think you can't handle me."

"Oh shut the fuck up," Hermione punched and shoved Bellatrix off her chair a little. Bellatrix shoved her back and they started grabbing each other until Bellatrix got up off her chair pulling Hermione with her. She shoved her down on the bed and crawled on top of her just like at Malfoy Manor. Holding her wrists, Bellatrix leaned down close to Hermione and whispered, "Still think you'll be able to handle me outside of this room?"

"Get off," Hermione told her.

"Or what," Bellatrix asked innocently with pouty lips. Hermione shut her eyes tightly not answering. Bellatrix got off finally and Hermione heard her crumple and rip up the letter from Rodolphus. She opened the door and walked out into the living room.

"Where's Hermione," Ginny asked concerned.

"She's fine; she's just having some girl issues," Bellatrix smirked.

Hermione came into view behind Bellatrix, "I'm not done with you!"

"M-maybe we shouldn't have come," Ron said, "We don't want to make things worse for you two."

"No!" Hermione shouted, "This has nothing to do with you guys. It only has to do with her sick madness. Let's go back to the common room. Bellatrix needs to be left alone."

They all got up and quickly left the suite. Hermione turned around to close the door and saw Bellatrix giving her a sorry, yet somewhat angry and scared expression.

"Be back later," Hermione said before shutting the door.

Bellatrix balled up her fists before grabbing a lamp and throwing it at the door.

Meanwhile, back in the Gryffindor common room, the others were trying to apologize for intruding on Bellatrix's space.

"It's not your fault, I promise," Hermione kept telling them, "She just has good days and bad days; apparently, today was bad. She can't be one hundred percent perfect every single day, even though she pisses me off so much sometimes."

"She really isn't that bad," Ginny said to the others.

"She was upset because Draco didn't come, and then I questioned her about some letter she got that only she could read…"

"A letter," Harry asked. "From who?"

"From…from _Rodolphus_."

"Rodolphus? What did it say?"

"Just that the rumours of him coming to get her were not true, and he was waiting for her to break out and join the rest of them waiting."

"Did she write back?"

"No, she didn't want to. She keeps telling me she doesn't want anything to do with death eaters anymore; she just wants to be with her family, people who care about her. But she's just still so crazy sometimes."

"Yes," Luna said, "She is rather loony, but she'll come around. Like you said, we all have good days and bad days."

Hermione sighed deeply, "I feel like a jerk now. I should've been more understanding. I shouldn't have let her get to me. I should've trusted her about the letter."

"Well that's not your fault," Ron said, "What reason has she given you, or anyone else for the matter, to trust her?"

"But I should at least give her a chance, right? Oh, I know that sounds ridiculous considering who she is and what she's done…. I'm sorry, you guys."

"Hey, whatever happens, we'll be by your side," Harry said wrapping an arm around Hermione, "The hardest part is over: Voldemort's dead. Now we don't have to worry about him manipulating Bellatrix. We can almost… start from scratch."

"Mmm, you guys don't have to get yourselves into this; this is my thing, I chose it."

"God, you're starting to sound like Harry, now," Ron said.

Harry got up off the couch and pulled Hermione with him in a hug, "It'll be okay. We'll figure out what to do with Draco later. Just don't beat yourself up about any of it."

Harry went up to the boy's dorm while Ron hugged Hermione and then followed. Lavender gave Hermione a small smile before going up to the girl's dorm.

"Well I guess I'll go back to my own common room," Luna said, "I hope you get some sleep tonight, Hermione."

After Luna left, Hermione walked over to Ginny, "Do you promise not to say anything to anyone if I tell you something about me and Bellatrix?"

Ginny gave her an odd look, "What are you saying?"

"We've gotten sort of close… And we've.."

"You slept with her?!"

"Shhh! No, I didn't sleep with her!... Yet, I mean, ugh, we've sort of… okay, we did make out a few times, but now with that everything's so complicated and I don't know what to do!"

Ginny rolled her eyes smiling, "Oh my god, Hermione. Do you really like her? I mean, does she really like you?"

"Yes; McGonagall put some truth telling charm in the room, our faces turn green if we're lying."

"She's probably still suspicious of you. Do you even consider yourselves "together" or does she still see you as her babysitter?"

"No, we haven't really talked too much about it, I guess."

"Well, if you girls are really that into each other, I think you can make it work to your benefit. She cares about you, so she's going to be easy to work with because she wants you happy, but if you don't know what you are right now, she's still not going to trust you. I know it's complicated, believe me, it all sounds complicated, this whole situation, _Bellatrix Lestrange_….Black. I think you need to talk to her about you guys."

Hermione melted into Ginny with a hug sighing, "Thank you so much for understanding. I just…I don't know if she's going to forgive me, I don't know what to do." Hermione was whimpering.

"It'll be fine, whatever happens. So, do you want to stay here, or are you going to go back there?"

"I think I should go back there; I'm kind of used to it now."

"Alright, just text me if you need to."

Ginny ran up to the girl's dorm while Hermione quickly sped back to Bellatrix's suite.

She walked inside and heard "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri playing. Her laptop was sitting on the coffee table in front of the T.V. She walked around to see Bellatrix lying on the couch with her eyes closed. She put a hand to her mouth and shook her head to herself getting a little teary-eyed. She quietly sat down on the floor between the table and the couch next to Bellatrix. She turned the volume down on the laptop a little and looked over at Bellatrix whose eyes were still closed. Hermione put her elbow on the couch with her chin in her hand and used her other hand to gently stroke Bellatrix's cheek awaking her from another one of her quick naps.

Bellatrix opened her eyes and grabbed Hermione's hand. She gave her a guilty look, "I broke one of the lamps, I put all the pieces together on the floor behind the couch."

Hermione took her other hand off her chin and placed it on top of Bellatrix's head giving her a small smile.

"Aren't you going to fix it," Bellatrix asked when she didn't get up and check the lamp.

"It's just a lamp," Hermione said still with tears in her eyes. "Bella… I'm so sorry…"

Bellatrix gave her a confused look as she continued, "It's like I never even gave you a chance, like no one did, so why would you even bother to put your faith and trust in people?"

"Well don't cry; Jesus, what is it with you and crying," Bellatrix said getting teary-eyed herself.

"I'm sorry, I'm just so emotional, and I just love you so much, I don't want you to be upset with me. I want us to work on this together, if you want to. I don't want to be some stupid boss you look up to. I want us to be equal. I want to be able to count on you as much as you count on me."

"Why are you apologizing to _me_? Do you remember who I am? I've tortured people; I've _killed_ people. I don't deserve your pity."

"But you can't get better if no one will try and give you a chance! And I want to give you a chance, that's why I started this whole thing! I want to really be there for you, and not just as a supervisor, or as a friend, but as something more.."

"You're not talking about…being my _girlfriend_?..."

"Well what did you think all the snogging was about? And the love confessions?"

"I don't know, I've never experienced it before with anyone before you. When I was with Rodolphus, it was just business. All this talk about feelings and emotions, it's all new to me. I hate to admit it, but it's also scary, but exciting at the same time."

"I just want you to promise me that you won't keep things from me from now on, no matter what they are. And I won't keep things from you."

"We can't be together, love, remember the doctor/patient nonsense?"

"Exactly, it's just nonsense, and I'm not a doctor for the millionth time. I'm just a girl, in love with another girl, and I know you love me back."

"What about what McGonagall will think?"

"Since when do _you_ care about what _anyone_ thinks of you?"

"Since I came here! Everything's different now, and new."

"Well it's going to be okay. I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you, Bella. And don't be upset about Draco; like you said, he's a stubborn prick. He'll come around, don't worry."

Hermione placed her hands on either side of Bellatrix's face and kissed her.

They both cuddled and held each other on the couch watching stupid T.V. shows for the next two hours. When Bellatrix got up and went to bed, Hermione decided to reply and write in the Bellatrix Blog.

_May 14/15, 1998_

_First off, I can tell you right now that my parents know about us and are totally fine, well my mother is, my father is a little worried, but whatever._

_And you're right, if loving each other helps you, then why not?_

_It's been a crazy week. I'm glad I finally have my parents back to normal. Ron is finally on my side and not upset with me anymore. I had to talk to Neville, and I was surprised that he was even more understanding than Ron about the whole situation._

_I tried to get Draco to come around, but it hasn't happened yet. There will always be a bump in the road somewhere, but we can always get around it._

_Sometimes I feel needy, and too lovey dovey. And annoying. I'm just trying to do what's right, and express what I really feel. I never liked lying to people._

_Bellatrix, don't repress anything, don't hold anything back. I'm here for you, and I can handle it._

_I'm giving myself to you, because like you, I feel like, in a way, I have no one else._

_So we can have each other. And don't try to hold in your craziness, life would be boring if you were perfect._

_Just trust me, and love me, because believe it or not, I need you just as much as you need me._


	9. Chapter 9

**As someone said in a review, I did accidentally put 2008 in the first chapter, when it really is 1998 (with all the extra 2013 gadgets).**

**I have a huge chunk of bellamione already written as I've said in the first chapter at the beginning. I don't know how I'm going to get there; I'm just making it all up as I go along. It starts on Hermione's last day ever at Hogwarts and is as long as all these chapters here put together, so I basically have about 8 chapters already written. Just need to get there…and try not to rush.**

**I found that most of the chapters end on either one or both going to sleep; sleep is so amazing. **

**Also, I try to get somewhere around 4,000 words in each chapter. Are they too long? Too short? Just right? If you guys are okay with it, I can cut it in half and make them 2,000 words and maybe I can get them out quicker than usual. Just something to think about.**

**Thank you SOOOOOO much for all the reviews, favorites, follows, and whatever else! It feels so nice to be able to connect with people around the world who enjoy something as much as I do.**

**I hope that wherever you guys/girls are, it is warm, or at least somewhat spring weather, because where I am (Michigan, USA), it is cold and annoying. Every time I'm at school and walking on campus, no matter what direction I'm in, the wind is ALWAYS blowing against me. I hate the wind. I wish Bellatrix was real so she could Crucio it for me. That'll teach it!**

Hermione promised Bellatrix she would try and talk with Draco one more time before writing her sister. She told her she was going to have to face her sooner or later though.

"What's the matter with you," Hermione said to her the next day, "You never were scared of anyone or anything. Where's crazy Bellatrix Lestrange when you need her?"

"Right here," Bellatrix hissed grabbing her from behind into a tight hug, "Just because I seemed crazy to you doesn't mean I was all the time, and that I didn't care about what my sister thought of me."

"Well she seemed like the nice one out of you two, I don't see the problem. Do you really think she'd allow Draco to still attend Hogwarts if she was still on the dark side?"

"No…, but she cares about him, more than anything and anyone. She's a great mother. I sometimes wished she was mine."

Hermione turned around and hugged her kissing her cheek, "Everything will be okay, it just takes time."

"It's taking too long, I'm impatient. I want to kill everyone now."

Hermione continued to hug and squeeze Bellatrix, her head resting against her shoulder.

"Aren't you going to scold me for saying that," Bellatrix asked.

"No, you're just telling the truth, it's the way you feel," Hermione answered, "I'm not like everyone else, Bellatrix. I'm not going to punish you for every negative thing that happens around you."

"Just some of it."

"Well, I really don't think I've done anything to really punish you."

"Whenever you leave me, it feels like a punishment."

A knock came at the door and Hermione went to open it. Professor McGonagall held a worried expression, "The minister is not able to come to Hogwarts at the moment for our meeting, but he is able to talk to us through the floo network in my office.. Ms. Granger, what do you think of escorting Ms. Black to my office in one hour by yourself?"

"Oh…! Well…. I guess we'll be okay. It might even be good for Bellatrix to get out of this room for once. We'll be there."

Professor McGonagall nodded her head, still wearing a worried expression as she turned around.

Hermione shut the door and looked at Bellatrix.

"She doesn't trust us," Bellatrix said.

"She's just doing her job," Hermione said walking back up to her and holding her hands.

"She's still afraid of me, as she's always been."

"She's probably afraid you'll get away from me and wreck havoc. Maybe you should show her the side you've been showing me."

Bellatrix gave Hermione a weird expression.

"The sane side, Bella," Hermione told her, "You're worse than a guy sometimes."

"I never said anything, you just assume, as always. You're the one with the dirty mind."

"Hmmm, I wonder," Hermione put her hand to her chin, "What if you came with me after the meeting to talk to Draco?"

"Why? I don't even know what I'd say to him."

"Then what do you expect to happen when I brought him back here?"

"I don't know! I just thought you would start something, and it would be easy."

"Well I'll still be there starting it; I'll ask McGonagall, she might say no, but whatever."

"Are you going to tell her about us?"

"Yes, but I think I'll do it later this evening, or tomorrow."

"Er..Hermione?"

"Mhm?" Hermione raised her eyebrows and twirled one of Bellatrix's dark curls with her finger.

"I want to write back Rodolphus."

"Why? What do you want to say to him?"

"That I'm done, with the whole dark side; and I know that even though I don't want it to, it's going to seem like I'm turning my back on them."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Well then, go ahead and write a letter and we'll take it to the owlery later. I'm going to the Gryffindor common room for a bit. I'll be back fifteen minutes before we need to leave for the meeting."

Bellatrix bit her lip and turned around to the table. Hermione let out a soft sigh before pulling out a sheet of paper from a notebook and a pen for her.

Hermione left and Bellatrix stared at the blank piece of paper with a puzzled expression.

_Rod, _

_Don't take this the wrong way. Don't come looking for me. I want nothing to do with the Death Eaters anymore. I am not writing this under the Imperio curse, and I know you can tell this is me from my handwriting. _

_I am glad you wrote to me though, I needed to tell you that I made it clear to the ministry that we are no longer affiliated as husband and wife. I'm not sorry._

_I am not being brainwashed. I want a better life for myself, and the people here are treating me well. _

_The Dark Lord Voldemort is dead. He was a liar, a hypocrite, and a disappointment. _

_Carry on with whatever you wish to do with your life, but don't count me in any of it no more._

_Bella_

As with the Bellatrix Blog replies, Bellatrix didn't reread her writing and left it at that. She walked over to the couch and messed with the T.V. while waiting for Hermione to return.

"Good luck with that," Harry said after Hermione told them about walking Bellatrix through Hogwarts to Professor McGonagall's office.

"Do you still want us to come over tonight," Ginny asked.

Hermione sat up and put her messy hair into a bun, "We'll see. I still have to talk to Draco again, Bellatrix's wishes, although I feel like his mother would be easier to talk to."

"Why doesn't she just write to Mrs. Malfoy?" Ron asked.

"She's too afraid of rejection."

"You know, Hermione, sometimes this person you call Bellatrix doesn't sound like the careless and sadistic Bellatrix we remember."

"She's different; she's in a totally different environment. She's not stuck in the dark anymore. Sure, she's still crazy a lot of the time, but she has gotten better. I mean, she spends most of her time with _me_, the person the most wanted to rip apart last time we met at Malfoy Manor."

"Still don't understand how you let that one get past her."

"No use in holding a grudge. What good will it do?"

"Have you even talked about…your past situations together?" Ginny asked.

"No, not really. I don't like to push her. She talks about whatever she wants. The more she gets to know me, maybe she'll trust me more, and then she'll tell me more."

"Hey, maybe she can be like a double agent like Snape was!" Ron said.

"Maybe. But not anytime soon. She's supposedly writing a reply letter to Rodolphus right now, and I think she feels like she's turning her back on them, which in a way she is, but she wants to make it right."

"Are you going to read it before it's sent out," Harry asked.

"I want to, but I don't want to force her to let me read it. It's tricky because I want us to develop more trust in each other, but at the same time, I want to make sure, because what if her intentions were still rooted to the dark side? Sometimes, I think for a second, what if she's just playing me?"

"She's not," Ginny said and smiled at her, both knowing the actual relationship between Hermione and Bellatrix.

"Well," Hermione said getting up, "I need to get back and take her to McGonagall."

"Sure everything will be okay?" Harry asked still concerned.

"…Yeah, it's Friday, most students will be outside anyways."

"And if they're not…," Ron added.

"She'll be fine. I know this is going to sound mental, but I think she's more scared about running into students than the students are scared of her."

"Yeah, you were always a mental one," Ron said, "But I guess then that makes sense why Bellatrix has taken a liking to you since she's obviously mental as well."

"Thanks, Ron," Hermione smiled, "You always know the right thing to say."

Hermione strolled back to Bellatrix's suite in a positive mood. She was thankful her friends were being so understanding now about everything, especially Ginny. She was so glad to have Ginny by her side. She knew she could trust her with anything, even if it meant going behind Professor McGonagall's back with the whole Bellatrix thing. Hermione knew Professor McGonagall was taking a huge risk allowing Bellatrix to stay at Hogwarts. She wouldn't necessarily say she was endangering the other students, but that's coming from Hermione's biased opinion. Bellatrix only has taken a liking to her because she was patient and kind and didn't give up on her like most people would (and have already). Also, the fact that their mental kindred spirits according to Ron.

She found Bellatrix turning channels with a bored expression when she walked in.

"Are you ready?" Hermione asked her.

"I guess," Bellatrix replied with a slight grunt.

"Did you write your letter?"

"Mmm," Bellatrix kept her eyes glued to the T.V. and pointed to the kitchen table. Hermione took that as permission to read the letter.

Hermione tucked it into her bag, "We'll send it after we talk to McGonagall, then we can go find Draco."

"Ughhhh, can't I just come back here afterwards?"

"Why? You may as well just come with me. There's no getting out of it. Everything will be fine!"

Hermione skipped to the couch and sat next to her grabbing her arm.

"Why are you so much more cheerful than usual?"

"I just love my friends, and I love you." Hermione had a gitty smile on her face.

"You got something up your sleeve."

"I don't, I promise."

"Your face is about to turn green." Bellatrix smirked her evil smirk and shoved her hand up Hermione's sleeve far enough to tickle her.

"No, no no NO!" Hermione laughed and pulled Bellatrix off the couch with her; Bellatrix's hand caught in her sleeve, but still tickling.

"Stop it, I'm gonna die," Hermione laughed and held onto her and Bellatrix pulled her hand out.

"You stretched out my shirt," Hermione gave her a pouty face.

"So," Bellatrix was expressionless.

"You're mean." Hermione put her arm through Bellatrix's and started walking towards the door.

Bellatrix stopped pulling her back, "Wait." She had a concerned look on her face.

"Don't worry," Hermione told her. "Don't talk to anyone, unless they talk to you. If someone says something negative, just ignore them. If someone says something nice, you can reply, _nicely_."

"I know how to act, you don't have to teach me social skills."

"I know you know how to act, it's just the part about choosing whether or not to do it right."

"Who says what's right and what's not?"

"I do."

They smirked at each other as Hermione opened the door and led them out.

**So I know I said at the top that I usually write 4,000 words. This is a little over 2,000 words. So let me know whether or not you care how long they are or whatever.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Okay, this is around 2,000 words. I was going to have this online yesterday or the day before, but Comcast messed up my internet. **

**I'll be starting the eleventh chapter as soon as I put this one up. :) **

"Ugh, the Gryffindor common room is on the complete opposite side of the castle from the Slytherin common room," Bellatrix scoffed as they walked down the staircase from the seventh floor.

"It's good exercise," Hermione replied.

"Are you calling me fat?"

"No, I just think it would be good for you to be able to walk around more instead of sitting inside all day like you did at Azkaban."

Bellatrix shivered, "Azkaban….."

They walked past the Great Hall where a few Slytherin students were standing around.

"Oh my merlin lord," one of them exclaimed, "It's Bellatrix Lestrange."

"Bellatrix _Black_ now," Bellatrix said to him.

"I bet hanging around with mudblood Granger is worse than hanging around dementors, eh?"

"What did you call her," Bellatrix narrowed her eyes and started to walk towards him, but Hermione pulled her back and walked them towards Professor McGonagall's office as the Slytherin boy was left with an odd expression at Bellatrix's reaction.

Hermione briskly knocked on Professor McGonagall's door while Bellatrix huffed impatiently.

"Any trouble," Professor McGonagall asked Hermione after she opened the door and let them inside the large room still packed with Professor Dumbledore's old books.

"No, everything's fine," Hermione said. "Minister."

"Hello, Hermione," Kingsley Shacklebolt replied from the Floo network, "Ms. Black. How are things?"

"Things are great. I'm glad I was able to get Bellatrix out of the room for a while."

"Yes, I'm very much surprised you haven't had any trouble with this one," he turned to look at Bellatrix who glared at him, but not saying a word.

"I think she's rather underestimated," Hermione said feeling Bellatrix squeeze her hand tightly, "….in some areas; overestimated in others. Perhaps all she needed was to be around people with positive energy."

"Yes, well, it's hard to understand how Lord Voldemort's best Death Eater has suddenly changed her ways while others have decided to completely ignore the rehabilitation program they so willingly submitted themselves to."

"Who," Bellatrix asked curious.

"I cannot give out names, Ms. Black."

He lowered his eyes to Hermione and Bellatrix's intertwined hands. Professor McGonagall also looked and had the same confused expression on her face as Shacklebolt.

"Hermione," he started again, "I would like to remind you that you are an adult now, and shall no longer be fooling around in puppy-love or one week crushes. Don't let Ms. Black fool you with her charm and beauty. We may have to send her back to Azkaban if you cannot work with her the proper way."

This time Hermione squeezed Bellatrix's hand, "Excuse me, minister, but what do you know about our relationship?"

Bellatrix's eyes widened and she was worried that if Hermione continued with her tone, they might be separated, but she also didn't agree with what the minister was saying.

"For your information, Professor McGonagall put a charm on Bellatrix's suite to show any lies being told in the room. It's sad that it has to be that way, but it is, and I'm sorry your other death eaters aren't doing so well, but don't bash Bellatrix for it. As for puppy-love and one week crushes, I'm sorry, but I've got more important things, and people, to worry about. Do you really think the smartest witch of her age would really throw it all away for a fake relationship with Bellatrix Lestrange?"

"_Black_," Bellatrix said angrily.

"Shut up," Hermione replied nudging her.

Professor McGonagall and Minister Shacklebolt were floored with their expressions. Hermione knew she shouldn't have said it; now she knows how Bellatrix feels. This is something she really cares about, and she didn't appreciate anyone criticizing her or Bellatrix, especially Bellatrix.

"No one's dead," Hermione said after a minute of silence, "No one's hurt. I walked her through the corridors and let her spend time with my best friends."

"But what happens when she gets her wand back?" the minister asked.

"Yeah, when am I getting my wand back," Bellatrix piped up.

"Probably not for another year," Hermione replied.

"What?!"

"Look, minister, everything is fine; I promise. I won't keep anything from you. Yes, Bellatrix and I are together now, but it's what's helping her, and it's working. And I'm not just doing it because it's working either. Please trust me."

Kingsley stared at her for a few seconds before replying, "Good job."

"What?"

"I was testing you. I wanted to see how committed, how much you care about Bellatrix. You see, a lot of our intern students who are working with other death eaters in rehab have been treating them poorly and using them for their own gain and experience. You're really one of a kind. I have always trusted you, Hermione, and I always will. Owl me if you need to."

The Floo Network flashed out and Professor McGonagall turned towards them. "Well, I guess that settles it for this meeting," she said. "Is there anything else you wish to ask me or tell me about?"

"I'm taking Bellatrix to the owlery, and then to find Draco," Hermione said, "I hope that's okay with you; we're trying to get more family involved, positive family interaction, don't worry. Is it okay to start letting her walk around Hogwarts now, as long as I am with her?"

"We can give it a try, Ms. Granger. Good luck."

"I hate how you all talk about me like I'm not even here," Bellatrix spat as Hermione grabbed her arm and walked her out of the office.

"Go ahead and wait here, Bella. I'll be out in a minute," Hermione said.

Bellatrix gave her a suspicious look before walking outside into the corridor. She noticed the Slytherin boy they bumped into was still lingering around. Bellatrix looked back through the crack of the door to see Hermione still talking to Professor McGonagall. She quickly walked over to the boy. He gave her a flirty smile before she grabbed his shirt and hissed in his face, "If I ever hear you call that girl a mudblood again, I'll have you screaming for your mummy like a little bitch."

"Yeah," he shoved her away a little, "Where's your wand?"

Bellatrix thought about it for a split second, but quickly replied, "I never needed a wand to torture my victims; they begged me for Crucio because it was not as bad." She dug her nails into his chest hoping to make a mark. Since filing her nails, she no longer had the long sharp claws to make her enemies bleed.

The boy walked away quickly. Bellatrix was pleased with herself and almost felt a high, like she just had a drug she was withdrawing from. She felt amazing and wanted more, but she knew she shouldn't.

When Hermione walked out of the room, Bellatrix stormed towards her.

"What the bloody hell am I supposed to do without my fucking wand for a whole fucking year?!" Bellatrix yelled to Hermione as they started walking towards the door to go outside.

"Calm down, you can use mine," Hermione said, "But only in the room."

"Oh, you mean in the bedroom," Bellatrix smirked.

"No, in the whole room; the suite."

They were almost to the owlery when Hermione saw Neville walking out towards their direction.

"What're you doing," Bellatrix said turning around when Hermione stopped.

"It's Neville," she said gesturing.

Bellatrix looked over and saw him walking with his head down.

"Look, don't say anything to him. I don't know if he'll say anything to you, but he might stop and talk to me. Just….remember what I said about being nice. Ignore him if he says something rash."

"My mother always said, "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." I say, "fine then, I'll just be mute my whole life."

Neville looked up and saw them both a few feet away from him. He gave a hesitant wave and decided to slowly walk over.

"Hey," he nervously laughed at Hermione.

"Hey, Neville," Hermione said, "Mailing something to your grandmother?"

"Yeah she's been wanting me to write more to her this year," he said not looking at Bellatrix once.

Bellatrix on the other hand was eyeing him like a hawk waiting for him to say something, _anything_, to her. She was just curious. She had only interacted with Neville once in her life and that was at the Department of Mysteries in fifth year. He had a feisty attitude back then, much like Hermione. Bellatrix smirked to herself as they continued their conversation without her. _He has no parents; she has both parents, but they are both feisty Gryffindors. Feisty cats; I can imagine Hermione in a feisty cat-like position on the bed_.

"Come on, Bellatrix," Hermione groaned pulling her out of her trance and towards the owlery.

"Where'd Longbottom go?"

"He left. Where did you go; Death Eater land?" She smiled at her as they walked inside.

"Hermione land."

"Hermione land! There must have been an awful lot of books and cushy chairs there!"

"Cushy beds."

Hermione smiled and rolled her eyes as she tied Bellatrix's letter to an owl leg and let it go, "Thanks for behaving around Neville."

"Yeah, whatever."

Hermione rubbed Bellatrix's cheek with the back of her hand, "Want to go find your stupid nephew now?"

"No."

Hermione laughed and linked their arms together before walking back towards Hogwarts.

"Shall we take you to a walk down memory lane into the dungeons to look for Draco?"

Bellatrix carelessly shrugged her shoulders.

They walked down the stairs passing a few glaring Slytherins; Bellatrix glared equally as hard back at them. They spotted Draco's white hair that stuck out like a sore thumb. He was talking to the Slytherin boy who insulted Hermione and was, therefore, assaulted by Bellatrix. Draco turned and looked at them as they approached.

He, surprisingly, walked straight up to Bellatrix, "You should be locked up in Azkaban you crazy bitch!"

"He one of your schoolyard chums?" Bellatrix asked gesturing to the Slytherin boy who stood back a few feet away from them.

"You shouldn't be allowed here; you're worse than _him_."

"Who? Are you talking about the scary Dark Lord?" Bellatrix's eyes lit up like an excited child's.

"I'm only going to give you one more chance to leave my friends alone, only because my mum wants me to be nice to you."

Bellatrix's smiling face went serious, "Your mum? She talked about me?"

"Wait, wait a second," Hermione stepped in, "What do you mean one more chance? Bellatrix hasn't done anything to your friends; she's only been out of her room for not even an hour."

"Well, _Granger_, maybe you should learn to watch her more while you're talking to your precious mentors."

Hermione rolled her eyes and turned towards Bellatrix who folded her arms and had a guilty expression on her face.

"What did you do," she sighed.

Bellatrix kept quiet.

Draco summoned his friend to come over and lift up his shirt; he hesitantly obliged. The right side of his stomach had four very red marks in the shape of finger nails on it, one of them bleeding.

"Bella!" Hermione gasped.

"I'm sorry," she said, "It's not one of my better pieces of work."

Hermione breathed in deeply and let it out slowly and looked back towards Draco, "I'm sorry; I really am. I should have watched her more."

Bellatrix started walking around rolling her head around and groaning.

"What's the problem?" Hermione turned around to make sure she didn't wander too far.

"You're apologizing to these two dimwits!"

"Because you're fucking crazy!"

"He called you a MUDBLOOD, you credulous whore!"

"Oh my god," Hermione put her hand to her head, "you need to calm down. We didn't come here for revenge."

"Why is it okay for them to call you a mudblood, but not me?!"

"It's not okay!" Hermione shouted to Bellatrix and then turned towards Draco, "It's not okay."

"Then I don't see what I did to be wrong."

"This is childish, Bellatrix. This is exactly what Professor McGonagall was worried about."

"Fuck her."

Hermione shook her head and gritted her teeth before turning back to Draco, "Look, I came back because I really think Bella needs support from her family. Obviously we're having problems right now, so do you mind giving me your cell number so I can take her back to the room and maybe calm her down, and I'll text you or something later this evening?"

Draco rolled his eyes and reached into his back pocket to get his phone. He slowly scrolled through his phone and looked up, "Do you want my mum's number?" He was asking more towards Bellatrix.

Bellatrix looked over stunned and then looked over at Hermione.

"Sure," Hermione replied for her.

Hermione apologized to Draco's friend again before escorting Bellatrix back to the room after putting both Draco and Narcissa Malfoy's cell number into her phone contacts.


	11. Chapter 11

**Omg you guys, I'm totally watching a very old spongebob episode; the one where they sing the F.U.N. song. Hermione would be spongebob and Bellatrix would be plankton. OMG IT'S SO PERFECT AND HILARIOUS!**

"You're lucky they're not reporting you!" Hermione yelled to Bellatrix once they got back into the room.

"Who're they going to tell," Bellatrix asked, "Old McGonagall? Giddy Shacklebolt?"

"This isn't funny."

"Who's laughing?"

Hermione sighed and walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. Bellatrix rolled her eyes as well as sighing herself before walking over to her.

"I only did it for you," she said as she sat down and started to caress her arm.

Hermione looked at her face. "I know. But you can't do those things anymore. I told you to ignore any negativity, didn't I?"

"He shouldn't have called you that."

"You shouldn't have either before, but I didn't dig my nails into you, did I?"

"…No, but you left me, and made me feel bad about it."

"I didn't make you feel anything. It's all you; because you suddenly care for me, someone other than yourself, you feel bad when I feel bad."

"You're not the only person I care about."

"Your sister?"

Bellatrix nodded and looked down at the table.

"You really miss her."

Bellatrix nodded again, her head still looking down.

"Why don't you call her?" Hermione held up her phone.

Bellatrix looked up with a scared expression, "No! I..I can't do that! .. I can't do that!"

"You confronted Draco, and he's a stupid bully."

"Yeah, but look how that turned out."

"Only because your relationship with Draco isn't as solid as the one with your sister is, it seems. And you heard Draco say she told him to be nice to you, so she can't be upset with you. She'd probably be happy, even relieved, to hear from you."

Bellatrix thought about it. "But what if she rejects you?"

"I have a feeling we won't have that problem."

"And if we do?"

"Do you want me to call her?"

Bellatrix shifted her eyes back and forth a few times between the phone and Hermione.

Hermione picked up the phone and scrolled down to Narcissa's number. Bellatrix held her breath with a worried expression. Bellatrix turned around and started biting her finger after Hermione pressed the call button and got up to pace while it rang.

She didn't show it, but Hermione was extremely nervous about talking to Narcissa. Nevertheless, she waited while it rang three times before a soft spoken woman answered the phone, "Hello?"

"..Hello..Is this Narcissa Malfoy?" Hermione asked trying to hide her shaky voice.

"Yes..," came Narcissa's voice.

"Um, I hope you don't mind me calling," Hermione was mentally kicking herself, "This is Hermione Granger, we've met on a sort of occasions…."

"Oh, oh! Well..Yes, we have. Ms Granger, er, are you calling about..Bellatrix?"

Hermione felt a bit of relief hearing that Narcissa was also a little nervous having this conversation, "Yes actually, I have her here with me at Hogwarts trying to get through a sort of rehabilitation program we've created with the minister and headmistress. I just thought it would be nice if she had more support from her family."

"Has she talked to Draco?"

"Yes, well, it didn't go very good, it was her first time being out of her room, but I think things will turn out okay later."

"She's a very stubborn and sensitive soul, Ms. Granger."

"Er, you can call me Hermione, if you'd like."

"Hermione. I'm very impressed that you've stayed with her this long. I had heard rumours about this whole process, but wasn't very sure. I am extremely grateful you called me."

"And I am extremely grateful you aren't screaming at me and rejecting me."

"I am not like my husband, or what my sister was in the past. I know I stood by and let things happen that I shouldn't have though. I just want what's best for my son, and for Bella. I know she can be a huge handful, and that may sound ridiculous considering she's older than me."

"No, no! I completely understand! Mrs. Malfoy, thank you so much for excepting me, you have no idea how happy it makes me, and how happy it will make Bella…. Do you want to talk to her?"

Bellatrix looked over wide-eyed still afraid, and shook her head vigorously.

"I would really appreciate that, Hermione, and please, call me Narcissa."

Hermione walked over to Bellatrix and handed her the phone. Bellatrix looked at it as if it was the hand of a dementor, but eventually grabbed it and put it to her ear.

"C-Cissy?"

"Bella! How are you? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, of course," Bellatrix's voice was hoarse and her eyes welled up with tears. She slammed her hand on the kitchen table upset that Hermione has taken her to these levels of emotions.

"Are you….crying?"

"No, I don't cry, you know that!"

"You sound like you're about to cry, Bella."

"She makes me cry! Everything has changed since I met her! Well, not everything, but very important things."

"Oh, so you feel now," Narcissa smirked and knew Bellatrix could hear it in her voice.

"Sometimes I don't know if I can handle it, Cissy…"

"Everything will be okay now. Now that everything has changed. Voldemort is gone. My husband is in Azkaban, I can live my life freely now. Although I still feel bad and think about how much of a coward I was to stay around with the Death Eaters, I won't just sit around sulking. Draco still needs me."

"I need you, too."

"You have me; you always have. And now you have Hermione, and she seems like a very nice girl. She's obviously had an influence on you."

"I love her. I haven't even known her for that long, but I love her… How Cissy? How can I suddenly love someone I hardly even know?"

"You've been cut off from that sort of thing for so long. Once Voldemort died, you allowed yourself to latch onto any sort of kindness a person gave to you. You're almost reborn; a baby that laughs and smiles at everything and everyone."

"But I don't laugh and smile at everyone."

"No? Are you not behaving yourself?"

"She's introduced me to some of her friends; they're nice. I like them. I can't imagine myself having a conversation with them before the Dark Lord died though."

"Because he imprisoned us all with fear."

"I was a coward. I should have protected you better."

"I made my own choices. Just like Andy."

"Er, Andy? Do you…still talk to her?"

"All the time now. It's sad that a huge part of our lives were torn to separate us."

"Well..I doubt she'd want to talk to me. I don't even understand how Hermione talks to me. The things I've done…. I was in bloody Azkaban for 14 years!"

"She's very special. Don't lose her, because I don't know if there is anyone else out there like that."

"You should come and meet her, properly… Not like you did at Malfoy Manor that one time…"

"…..Yeah, that would be nice. I would enjoy visiting you and Draco."

"One of Draco's idiot friends called Hermione a mudblood."

"I'm not surprised."

"Has he not changed at all, even a little bit?"

"Draco changed has changed a lot. He changed before any of us did. He changed before Voldemort died, he changed before Albus Dumbledore was murdered. Ever since he was ordered to carry out the deed for his father, he's been different, more serious."

"I pushed him to do it, too. That's why he hates me, along with everything else about me."

"He doesn't hate you. He keeps pictures of you and him when he was a baby, before you went to Azkaban. You were always the fun aunt. He always used to ask me if were born crazy."

"Hermione says I wasn't."

"I know you weren't…. I love you, Bellatrix, I want you to know that, and take it seriously. There is no excuse for the terrible things you did, but in order to get better, you need to confront your past, with our parents, with Rodolphus, with Voldemort, with Azkaban…. Before you can feel better, you need to talk about them, and you can always talk to me."

"Hermione said the same thing."

"You should learn to trust her. Draco always talked a lot about her, even though a lot of it was negative, I could tell she was a very good person."

"You know, I was really scared to call you."

"Why?"

"I was afraid you would be mad at me, for turning my back on the dark side, and I was afraid you would hate Hermione."

"You forget I was never a Death Eater. I may have mingled with the group, but I always had my own opinions, even though I kept them to myself."

"Don't keep them to yourself anymore. When can you come visit me so I can feel like I belong with someone for once?"

"I can come tomorrow, tomorrow is Saturday right?"

"Yes."

"I don't hardly care about the days of the week anymore now that I can do whatever I want whenever I want without having to answer to Lucius."

"I would have killed him for you if you just asked; I still would."

"Haha, I appreciate the offer, hun. He'll get what's coming to him. Until then, you behave yourself and tell Hermione I'm excited to get together on Saturday around noon."

"Alright… WAIT!"

"What?"

"Hermione got me my own phone! Do you text?"

"Yes, sadly, I have to say I'm turning into one of _those_ witches now, fooling around with muggle devices, but it helps me keep in touch with Draco easier."

Bellatrix and Narcissa exchanged numbers and hung up with each other. Bellatrix turned around to see Hermione looking at her with a hurt look.

"What," Bellatrix asked.

"I understand you want your sister around to feel like you belong more, but you do belong with me, don't you?"

"I thought I belonged _to_ you," Bellatrix said walking towards her and grabbing her hand.

Hermione leaned against her as they wrapped arms around each other.

"Are you tired," Hermione asked her.

"Yes, how did you know?"

"Well, it's you, and I know you usually get tired after having deep conversations full of deep emotions."

Bellatrix decided to take a nap, as usual. Hermione went to find Ginny and invited her and Luna over that night. She told them about Draco. She also told them she didn't want to invited Harry and Ron over because it might seem like an ambush, and she wanted Draco to feel comfortable, just like she wanted Bellatrix to feel comfortable.

Hermione almost thought this was some sort of dream; everything was working out perfectly. Well, not really, there was the incident with Draco, but she was sure he'd come around, especially once Narcissa was at the castle. She went back to the room a little bit after 2 P.M. and found Bellatrix still sleeping. She decided to make her a new playlist.

Asleep by The Smiths

Falling In by Lifehouse

Maybe by Kelly Clarkson

The Middle by Jimmy Eat World

Waiting Outside the Lines by Greyson Chance

Witchy Woman by The Eagles

No Matter What by Badfinger

Stop Crying Your Heart Out by Oasis

Another Believer by Rufus Wainwright

Happy Together by The Turtles


	12. Chapter 12

**Don't worry, guys. I really am glad you all want me to continue the story. I seem to be on a roll now since I've switched to 2,000 words a chapter.**

It was 4 P.M. and Bellatrix was still sleeping. Although not surprised, Hermione went into the bedroom to wake her up. She was, however, surprised to see that she actually was already awake, just staring at the ceiling when she walked in. She turned her head towards Hermione closing the door.

"How are you," Hermione asked sitting on the side of the bed.

"Worried," Bellatrix sighed.

"Why worried?"

"Because my sister explained to me why I suddenly have fallen in love with you so quickly. And I do love you, Hermione, I really do! But…"

"Go on."

"You have no reason to love me."

"Why? Because most of your life has been centered on the negative things you have done? I told you, I don't care about your past. Well, I do, but it has nothing to do with how I feel about you now."

"But I'm still bad!"

"Not all the time. Bella, no one is perfect. You don't _have_ to be perfect. You just need to learn to control your emotions better, that's all. I know there must be reasons you are the way you are. But I can't help you until you feel ready to tell me."

"You mean trust you? Does that mean you won't tell anyone what I tell you, and you won't judge me or look at me differently?"

"Well, I might look at you differently a little bit, but it won't change my feelings for you, and if it does, it will only increase my love. Stop being so worried."

Hermione smiled and climbed on top of her making Bellatrix smirk a little, "I don't scare you do I?"

Bellatrix quickly flipped them around so she was on top, "No little girls scare _me_."

Hermione smiled and pulled her towards her to kiss her cheek, "I'm going to text Draco soon. I invited Ginny and Luna to come over, but that's it, because I don't want Draco to feel ambushed. Really, now that I think about it, Luna will be the one left out: two Gryffindors, two Slytherins, and one Ravenclaw."

"Good, no stupid Hufflepuffs."

"Hufflepuffs are not stupid! I'm tired of people bashing them. They're very loyal people."

"Well, maybe you should be a Hufflepuff then."

"No, I'm a brave Gryffindor; brave enough to put up with you."

"Which begins the cycle again as to why you even put up with me in the first place. Such a mystery."

"Oh, give it up already!" Hermione pushed Bellatrix off of her, "I'm texting Draco."

"And I forgot to tell you that my sister is coming to visit you, me, and Draco tomorrow around noon."

Hermione had her phone, but quickly turned around to look at Bellatrix again, "What? So soon?"

"Is that a problem?"

"No, it's just.."

"What?"

"Nothing. I'm sure it'll be fine."

"You're worried she still might reject you."

"Well, it's just…it will be weird having all three of you around for the first time since…since what happened at Malfoy Manor."

Bellatrix got up off the bed and walked over to Hermione and grabbed her in a hug, "I could apologize infinity times for what I did… but it wouldn't matter."

"I'm not blaming you," Hermione hugged her back, "I'm just saying."

Bellatrix pulled back and gently kissed Hermione's forehead, "I don't ever want to hurt you again, ever."

Hermione stared at her for a few seconds before they both heard a pounding on the door. Bellatrix kissed her cheek twice before going over to the couch to turn on the T.V. while Hermione opened the door.

"Hi!" said an excited Ginny. Behind her were Luna and Draco. "I thought I'd grab Draco, here, for you."

"Oh, well, thanks, I was just about to text you, Draco."

They walked in and Hermione shut the door.

"Hey there new best friend," Ginny said plopping down next to Bellatrix, "What are we watching?"

"Don't know yet," Bellatrix replied still flipping channels.

Luna sat cross-legged in one of the arm chairs while Draco confidently sat on Bellatrix's other side. He had a bag where he pulled out a large bottle and set it on the coffee table. Bellatrix glanced at it.

"Hope you don't mind, Draco brought refreshments," Ginny told Hermione as she sat down in the other arm chair across from Luna.

"What's that," Hermione asked sitting back.

"Fire Whiskey, want some," Draco gave Hermione a smirk she immediately recognized also belonged to Bellatrix. "I'll share with you all."

"Draco has been in an oddly good mood around us while we walked him here," Luna said.

"Yeah, what's the catch," Hermione eyed him, "There must be poison or something in it."

Draco quickly plucked off the cap and took a swig before handing the bottle to Ginny to pass it to Hermione, "Here, pour everyone a glass."

"Well not everyone may want some," Hermione said looking at the others.

"I'll have some," Ginny said watching Bellatrix continue to flip channels.

Draco grabbed the remote from Bellatrix, "Here I'll find something so we don't get headaches from all the station changes."

"You don't grab anything from me, boy!" Bellatrix shouted grabbing it back and getting really close to Draco's face, "I can find it on my own.."

Draco gave her a nervous smile, "It? You mental case."

Bellatrix smacked him upside the head and elbowed him.

"Bella!" Hermione shouted.

"Kids," Ginny added.

"Luna would you like some?"

"No, thank you," Luna replied, "I like to be alert as I can possibly can; you never know what crazy creatures are flying around in front of you."

"Wrackspurts," Ginny laughed.

"Not at this time of the year, Ginny."

"Well Draco, I know you'll be having some. Bella, you're having some, right?"

Bella quickly shook her head 'no.' For some reason, Hermione found her answer quite odd. Not to say she thought Bellatrix was an alcoholic.

"You want to help me in the kitchen, then, Bella?"

"Here, can I take it now?" Draco said asking for the remote.

Bellatrix glared at him as she passed the remote to Ginny and followed Hermione into the kitchen.

"Why aren't you having any?" Hermione asked innocently when they were alone.

"I just don't want to drink alcohol," Bellatrix replied sitting down at the table.

"I think Draco is doing a good job trying to be civil. Maybe you should try a little bit harder to be nicer to him."

"Maybe you shouldn't forget he's a pathetic excuse for a Slytherin. I understand how you can be nice to him, because you're weird and apparently love everyone, but now you've brainwashed Ginny and Luna to like him."

"Hey! There are a lot of people saying the same thing about you! Don't be a hypocrite like Voldemort. You're a thousand times better than him."

"Only a thousand times?"

"I'm asking nicely," Hermione set the tray of drinks on the table and sat in Bellatrix's lap wrapping her arms around her neck, "Please, do it for me?"

Bellatrix looked up at Hermione as she held her.

"You look drunk already," Hermione said to her.

"The way you look at me sometimes makes me feel drunk."

"Is that…bad…or good?"

Bellatrix sighed burying her face in Hermione's neck, "It's definitely good. You smell so good. You taste so good."

Hermione smiled fervidly as she felt Bellatrix kissing and licking her neck, "We need to get back to them now."

"They have 500 channels to flip through," Bellatrix replied not stopping.

"I promise we can continue this when they leave," Hermione whispered into her ear.

Hermione hopped off Bellatrix and grabbed the tray.

"Here, I got it," Bellatrix said smiling and taking it from her.

Hermione followed Bellatrix to the living room.

"This is a sight to see," Draco smirked again, "The infamous Bellatrix Lestrange serving drinks to people!"

"BELLATRIX BLACK!" Bellatrix screamed slamming the tray onto the coffee table.

Draco covered his mouth and laughed at being able to get Bellatrix mad again.

"Draco, if you're going to constantly make remarks to get Bella mad, you might have to leave," Hermione told him.

"She's the one that's supposed to be learning to handle her crazy emotions! Come on, Granger, I heard you've tamed her a little bit."

"You piss me off," Bellatrix said sitting back down next to him, "Just like your damn father."

"Fuck my father," Draco said seriously.

"No longer a daddy's boy, eh, Draco?" Ginny asked.

Draco didn't answer her, just glared at the T.V. screen.

"Well at least that's one thing we can agree on, is your father is low-life scum," Bellatrix said to him.

"Yeah, well don't try to act all high and mighty; you're just like him."

Bellatrix turned her face towards Hermione.

"Draco, Bella has gotten better, and I think we need to just forget about the past and move on. You don't hear me bringing up all the things you did to me, do you?"

"Like the time you punched me and broke my nose in third year?"

Bellatrix's face immediately turned to excitement, "You broke his nose? Oh, do tell the story, I'd like to hear it!"

Draco scoffed as Hermione smiled and started, "Well, I won't tell all the details, you could honestly make them into a huge blockbuster film, but anyways, Harry, Ron, and I were going to see Hagrid and ran into Draco and his friends. Draco, of course, had a smart ass attitude and said some things which made me upset, so I threatened him with my wand at his throat. Ron said it wasn't worth it, so I turned around, but then turned around again punched him. It felt good."

"Whatever," Draco said with a slight smile on his face.

"I have another story that you might actually like, Draco," Hermione said. "It was during our second year. Harry and Ron were sure you were the heir of Slytherin, but we had to make sure. So we created Polyjuice Potion. Harry and Ron ended up as Crabbe and Goyle, and I was supposed to be Pansy Parkinson, but ended up accidentally using one of her cat's hairs, and well…."

Bellatrix smirked and nodded her head thinking about Hermione in cat-like positions again.

"Wait…," Draco laughed, "So you were a cat, but… Potter and Weasel were Crabbe and Goyle, and I didn't even know it?"

"Yeah, they said you found them with Percy Weasley, and then walked back to the Slytherin common room and asked you about being the heir of Slytherin."

"I think I remember a little," Draco said thinking. "But now you know, I wasn't the one who opened the Chamber of Secrets."

"I was," Ginny said calmly.

"What?" Bellatrix and Draco both said.

"Again, another long story that could be a movie," Hermione said, "Why don't we start drinking and maybe I'll tell you more later."

Ginny, Hermione, and Draco drank for three hours straight while Bellatrix and Luna sat back and just listened to them banter and laugh.

"The first time Draco ever called me a mudblood was in second year," Hermione was laughing hysterically along with Draco while the others smiled and listened. "Ron was super upset when he said it and tried to jinx Draco, but his wand was broken, and it back-fired on him!"

"It was funny and gross at the same time, but he started puking up slugs the next second," Draco remembered. "Hey why aren't Potter and Weasley here anyways?"

"I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable around so many Gryffindors," Hermione replied.

"I'd just threaten them with Bella if they got out of hand," Draco said putting his arm around her.

Three more hours passed and the drinking group was barely comprehensible. Luna decided it was time to take Ginny back to the Gryffindor Common room.

"Draco, I can walk you back to your common room if you'd like after dropping Ginny off," Luna offered.

"Sure," he said standing up, "Escort me, m'ladies."

Ginny and Hermione got up to see them out.

"Hey, auntie Bella!" Draco screamed before going out the door, "Twas nice to see you, but I miss you being crazy, you need to drink!"

"I'll see you tomorrow, Draco," Bellatrix said from the couch.

Hermione shut the door and turned around giggling. Bellatrix stood up and walked towards her.

"I think you should go to bed," Bellatrix said to her.

"Beeed?" Hermione whined, "I don't want to go to beeeed! I want to stay up with you, and only with you."

"It's better to sleep off the drunkenness as soon as you can, love."

"But don't y'want me t'keep my promise to you from earlier?"

Bellatrix laughed, "No, I think I'll manage."

Hermione put on a pouty face, "But don't you want to get to second base with me, Bella, m'dear?"

"Not when you're drunk."

"But I'm not that drunk," Hermione said taking her shirt off and revealing her bra. "I can see it in your eyes you waaannnt to!" Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's hand and placed it on her bare stomach slowly pushing it towards her breasts.

"No!" Bellatrix quickly pulled away, "I can't do this to you! You don't want this."

"What're you talking about, I do want it!"

"You might regret it when you wake up and are sober again."

"How d'you know what I might do?"

"Trust me, I know."

"You know? Has this happened to you before? Is that why you didn't want to drink? Did you think I would try and take advantage of Bellatrix….wait for it….Black?"

"Please don't mock me, just go to bed."

"No, no, baby, I'm not mocking you," Hermione put her hands on either side of Bellatrix's face. "I might be tipsy, but I'll remember this in the morning. I want you to talk to me about it, okay, lovey dovey?"

Bellatrix put Hermione to bed and was thankful she fell asleep as quickly as she pulled the covers over her. Bellatrix sat up thinking about the past. More things to confront now, but maybe it will be easier once she sees her sister tomorrow. For now, she waiting for the morning and sober Hermione to come back around so she could have someone sensible to lean on.


	13. Chapter 13

**I know, I know, I'm sorry. It's the end of the semester, don't worry. I'm trying to be more frequent! I love my bellamione as much as you do. :)**

_Saturday May 16, 1998_

_It is 10:45 in the morning and I am sitting at the kitchen table bored out of my mind while you sleep. I should wake you up for our visit with my sister and nephew, but I'll wait a little while longer. _

_I can't tell you how relieved I am that my sister is taking this all so well, and that Draco is also playing along. _

_The only people I can honestly say I care about are you and Narcissa. And I guess Draco because my sister sincerely cares about him._

_I didn't sleep last night at all. I'm not tired. I'm still thinking about everything and worried. I'm thinking about the past, but at the same time, I'm not, because I don't want to. I don't want to talk about it, I'm too afraid, yes, I am afraid, I said it (wrote it)._

_What do you expect from a coward who took orders from the only person who gave her real attention? A person that killed and tortured people for her own amusement and self-gain?_

_I have to tell you that I wanted to kill that boy that called you a mudblood. I still want to kill him. And if I can kill him without getting in trouble for it, I will. Because I felt good while threatening him. There are only two times when I feel good now: when I am killing or torturing people, and when I am with you._

_Narcissa said you are like my new Voldemort. I find myself thinking I would do anything for you, I don't know why; well I know why, I love you, but I don't know why I love you. Well yeah, I do know that, too: you're nice, patient, understanding, mostly calm, funny, and pretty. Not like the others who run away the second they see the real me. The real me, that needs to be in Azkaban, I probably should be. I may seem better on the outside, but on the inside, I still feel the darkness flooding itself around in my veins._

_Whenever you touch me, I feel a warmth, but it goes away the second you stop. Like it's only temporary. And I hope your love isn't temporary. I'm really taking a chance with trusting you, because I have no choice._

_What do your muggle parents know? I'm sure they only know small pieces of our world. They would hate me. And I don't blame them._

_How do you feel needy? I'm the one that wants/needs all the attention. I don't mind you being lovey dovey. I quit enjoy it. _

_How do you need me? What do you need me for? _

_You think you have no one else? That's a joke. You have so many people who love and care about you. Who do I have? Barely you and my sister. Because you're both almost as crazy as I am. Narcissa I can understand because she grew up with me._

_Nonetheless, if you say so. _

Right as Bellatrix finished her letter in the Bellatrix Blog Hermione stumbled out of the bedroom and looked around with a bitter look on her face. Bellatrix looked up at her.

"Uhh," Hermione put her hand over her mouth like she was going to throw up and ran to the bathroom. Bellatrix got up and followed her.

Bellatrix kneeled down next to her and the toilet and held her hair back rubbing her back gently until she was sure she was finished.

"Ohh, I'm never drinking again," Hermione said as she flushed the toilet.

"I've said that plenty of times when I was your age," Bellatrix sighed helping her up.

"Yeah, about that," Hermione said grabbing her tooth brush.

"About what," Bellatrix asked sternly.

"About what you said last night. Something happened, and I want to know about it."

"It's not important. Maybe we'll talk about it later when you're feeling better."

Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's arm as she tried to walk away and pulled her into a hug ; toothbrush sticking out of her mouth. She rested her head against Bellatrix's shoulder and groaned, "My head hurts."

"It'll do that when you drink," Bellatrix said holding her tightly, "Now go take a shower before my sister comes."

"Ugh, can't I go back to bed?" Hermione whined.

"No, we made plans and we're sticking to them," Bellatrix turned her around towards the shower and turned it on.

"Who the fuck do you think you are? Hermione Granger?"

"No, I don't think anyone can be as bossy as Hermione Granger."

"The tides have changed today, and I don't like it. Hey, I'm still in charge, you know."

"I thought no one was in charge and it was a mutual relationship."

"You're a mutual relationship," Hermione said with an attitude.

"That makes no sense. Now are you going to take your clothes or do you need help?"

"Mmm, if I wasn't so hung over I would _definitely_ enjoy your assistance, but I think I'll manage."

Bellatrix walked out and waited for Hermione to be done. She picked up her "stupid muggle phone" as she called it and found one of those text messages from Narcissa. Her eyes widened a little as she opened the message.

Narcissa: Hope you are getting this…I am in Hogsmeade now. They're giving me level 2 Veritaserum (I'll explain levels later because I know you're questioning me now). Once they see I'm not as crazy and evil as they think, I can come to Hogwarts. I will get Draco and we will come to your room.

_Levels_, Bellatrix thought, _What the hell does that mean_?

Hermione walked out of the bathroom in clean clothes, but still with a tired look on her face. She sat down next to Bellatrix on the couch and closed her eyes.

"Hey," Bellatrix said a bit too loudly for Hermione, "Explain this to me." She handed her the phone with her sister's message.

Hermione sighed putting the phone on the coffee table and rubbing her eyes and forehead, "I heard the Veritaserum potion they give to people they think are lying isn't as good as they believed. Some wizards and witches have created higher kinds of it I guess. I think there are five levels. The first being the regular, obviously, and the fifth being probably for the darkest wizards and witches."

"Like me?"

"Probably," Hermione laid down not in the mood to try and make Bellatrix feel better about herself and her situation. Although, Hermione still didn't fully understand why Bellatrix has suddenly felt bad about being a dark witch when she used to love it and flaunt it anytime she could, she knew the reasons they had discussed, but she still had her doubts. She had hoped that they were planning on using the higher Veritaserum on Bellatrix, but only because they wanted to, that way Bellatrix didn't feel like Hermione was the one betraying her. What was she supposed to do; blindly trust everything Bellatrix says to her now?

She loved her. But she wanted to make sure who and what she loved was really real. She had never heard or seen, as she and Bellatrix call it, the "green face" before. She was thinking about asking Professor McGonagall about it, or maybe she would look it up in the library.

It was 11:30 when Hermione opened her eyes to find Bellatrix not on the couch anymore. She sat up and turned around to see her sitting at the kitchen table eating a bowl of cereal. Hermione stared at her for a few seconds.

Bellatrix looked up to find Hermione staring at her with a blank expression, "What?"

"Nothing," Hermione got up and grabbed a water bottle from the refrigerator and sat down across from Bellatrix. She grabbed the Bellatrix Blog that was always left on the table and flipped to Bellatrix's Goals page. She scanned them and looked up, "When you said you want to get out of this room, does yesterday count?"

"No because what I meant was that I wanted to get out of this room and never have to come back," Bellatrix looked at her like she should have known.

Hermione looked back at the paper and crossed out one of the goals and turned it towards Bellatrix to look at, "Number 5 will be ongoing and probably will never be crossed off until you die."

Bellatrix raised an eyebrow at Hermione before looking back at the page that now read:

Bellatrix's Goals

1. Get out of this bloody room.

2. Get to second, third, and home with Granger.

3. Get my wand back.

5. Never go back to Azkaban.

Hermione was glad she was improving, or at least accomplishing what she wanted, things that weren't killing and/or torturing people. She knew number 3 and number 5 were the last things that would be on the list. She wasn't sure what would come next: number 1 or number 2. She kind of wanted to wait until Bellatrix was well enough to get out of the room to do any number 2 business. She continued to drink her water for she felt her face getting hot and probably red from blushing. Maybe she should've waited to kiss Bellatrix, because she can't just stop now. Bellatrix wouldn't have that, neither would Hermione. But what if Bellatrix goes crazy and mad one time and ends up biting her tongue, lips, and face off? _She's not a cannibal_, Hermione told herself, _But she's Bellatrix Lestrange_. Or she was; does a name change actually change a person?

Bellatrix got up and put her bowl in the sink and turned around, "Err, going to throw up again?"

Hermione looked up not aware of the facial expressions she was making while thinking everything, "No! I was just day dreaming…"

"Or day nightmaring more like it."

Then Hermione just thought, _I'm going to be alone with Bellatrix Lestrange, and Narcissa and Draco Malfoy…_

"Guess I'm just….nervous," Hermione was holding herself as Bellatrix walked around and sat next to her.

Bellatrix grabbed her hand and started getting tears in her eyes again. For a split second she cursed herself for being weak, but let them fall so Hermione could see how upset she really was.

"Please," Bellatrix whimpered as Hermione turned towards her, "You've got to believe me. I'm still cruel, and I still hold a lot of anger and hate, and I wish I could torture, and kill so many people, to make the things in my head go away, but please believe me when I say….if I had to take anything in my life back, it would be that."

Hermione continued holding her hand and rubbed the spot on her arm where her dark mark used to be.

"It made me a stronger person," Hermione told her, "We might not be here together if it hadn't have happened."

"_Why_ did you come back for _me_, after what I did to you?"

Hermione cried putting her face in her hands and looked back up at Bellatrix, "Because I thought if I saved you, it would be like saving Sirius. But I can't save you. Only you can save you."

"Are you really that blind? If it wasn't for you, I would probably be in Azkaban again, right now, getting more insane by the hour. If it wasn't for you, I would never have seen or talked to my sister again, or my nephew. If it wasn't for you, I would never have experienced what true love really felt like."

Hermione climbed onto her lap hugging her and all her doubt before had melted away, though she hated herself for even thinking Bellatrix didn't really care about her. Because Bellatrix Lestrange, or even Bellatrix Black, wouldn't stoop down to acting like she cared about someone like Hermione. No, she had changed, even if it was just a tiny bit. And Hermione was thankful that the tiny change all had to do with accepting and loving her.


	14. Chapter 14

Bellatrix calmly opened the door at exactly twelve o'clock to find Narcissa, and Draco, who had the same bitter face Hermione was wearing earlier, standing outside.

"Feel free to use the bathroom if you need to," Bellatrix sighed letting them in, "You look more pale than usual."

Draco shook his head and walked over to Hermione in the kitchen and sat down.

"Want this," Hermione handed him a water bottle.

"Bella! You're looking very….," Narcissa stepped in and glanced at her older sister's face, "You look…different."

"I haven't made _that_ many changes to my appearance," Bellatrix rolled her eyes, "I still look like me."

"I think she's referring to the decrease in frown lines in your face, and the stress and tension level has gone down, which is what we want, so the muscles in your face aren't as tightened as they would be if Voldemort was still alive and in charge of you," Hermione said from the kitchen as she made tea.

"Know-it-all," Bellatrix muttered turning back to her sister. "Voldemort was never _in charge_ of me, I was just simply a good and well-behaved confidant."

"Well-behaved," Narcissa laughed, "You were like a child!"

"She still is," Hermione replied.

"Do you mind?!" Bellatrix yelled.

Narcissa turned her head and gave Hermione a big smile. She turned back towards Bellatrix, "So when and why did you finally decide to fix your horrid teeth?"

"_She_ made fun of me," Bellatrix pouted with her head low.

Hermione rolled her eyes and shook her head at Narcissa.

"Mmhm," Narcissa walked over to the kitchen table and sat down next to Draco.

"I really appreciate your coming, N-Narcissa," Hermione said with a shaky voice as she handed her some tea.

Bellatrix immediately noticing the nervousness in Hermione's voice walked over and sat across from her sister and next to Hermione putting an arm around her, "Don't be so shy, dear. It's me you have to worry about, not her. I was always the bad one, right, Cissy?"

"What about your other sister, Andromeda," Hermione asked.

"What about her?" Bellatrix asked looking over at Narcissa. Hermione looked over at her, too, hoping she had an answer for Bellatrix.

"Sit up, boy!" Bellatrix pounded her hand on the table in front of Draco who was laying his head down, "She had as much as you did and can still control herself."

Draco grunted sitting up and folding his arms glaring at his aunt.

"I have talked to Andy," Narcissa said to Bellatrix, "She's asked about you, and how you're doing. I also have talked with her daughter, Nymphadora, and her husband Remus."

Hermione's ears perked up when she heard Remus' name. She felt a little less nervous knowing Narcissa was on good terms with him, so she must be safe to be around. So far, so good; now Hermione knows how Bellatrix felt when she brought Ginny and Luna over, but that was different, Ginny and Luna never tried to kill Bellatrix, maybe harm during the war, but never kill.

"Draco, sweetheart, you don't have to stay if you're really not feeling well," Narcissa said rubbing his back.

"Yes, I was the only responsible one last night," Bellatrix said, "Well me and Hermione's friend, _Looooona_."

"They're just kids, Bellatrix," Narcissa said, "You should understand, their mentality is only a bit higher than yours."

Hermione and Draco tried to hide their snickers but failed.

"Why are you all constantly making fun of me?!" Bellatrix yelled.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Bella," Hermione laughed grabbing her hand and leaning on her shoulder, "You're just such an easy and fun target."

Draco got up at the first sign of Hermione and Bellatrix's public displays of affection. He hugged and kissed his mother goodbye before waving to the other two. Hermione got up and let him out.

After another half hour, Narcissa got up from the table, "Is it okay if I have a word with Hermione alone; perhaps in the bedroom?"

Bellatrix gave her sister an odd look.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything," Narcissa told her as Hermione got up as well; although, Bellatrix and Narcissa were both thinking different things that could happen between them in the bedroom. Narcissa meant no harm, but it wasn't harm Bellatrix was worried about.

"So you're the new facilitator now," Bellatrix said as they began to walk towards the bedroom, "Don't think the new high and glorious headmistress would be please."

"I'll have a word with you alone, too, just be patient."

Bellatrix huffed as the door was closed.

Hermione walked to the other side of the room and turned around gripping the bed frame and biting her lip.

"I just want to say, first, how utterly amazed and impressed I am," Narcissa started. "When I first thought about coming to visit, it was only to see and apologize to you, because I thought things would be a lot different inside this room. It looks like you're just roommates. I don't know how you're doing it, Hermione, but whatever it is, continue, because I don't remember the last time I've seen her that calm for that amount of time. I mean, sure, she still has her split second outbursts, but they seem to be nothing to what they used to be; especially the way they were when _he_ came back."

Hermione didn't know what to say. She didn't know if the "green face" was supposed to work on Narcissa, and she wasn't even sure she should trust it anyways. Narcissa noticed Hermione was still gripping the bed frame. She cautiously walked over, knowing Hermione was still shy of her. Hermione gasped when she felt Narcissa's hand on hers trying to carefully pry it off.

"You don't have to be scared," Narcissa told her. "I actually think you have it backwards; you should be scared of her, not me. But then again, this is only our…second time ever really meeting."

"She's much less scary without a wand and a dagger," Hermione said lower her eyes to Narcissa's wand planted in a pocket on her dress.

"Yeah, but she's still crazy even without them," Narcissa laughed.

Hermione laughed as well. She jumped a second after hearing a loud knocking at the door.

"Are you two finished yet," came Bellatrix's voice.

"We'll be out in a minute, Bells," Narcissa replied. She turned back to Hermione, "Thank you for calling me and inviting me over. I appreciate being included, even if I was part of the whole problem."

Hermione told herself she needed to stop being such a baby. Narcissa wasn't like the others on the dark side. She needed to get past the fact that she is Draco's mother, Lucius' wife, the sister of Bellatrix Lestrange…When she said the name Bellatrix Lestrange in her head, she didn't even think of _her_ Bellatrix anymore. It's almost as if the real Bellatrix Lestrange was still out there in the world.

"You're more than welcome to come over and visit her anytime you like," Hermione smiled squeezing her hand. "And maybe bring your other sister, if that would help."

"We'll see. Bellatrix and Andromeda haven't talked in almost twenty years."

"Wow," Hermione gasped, jumping again as another harsh knock.

"I've already counted past a minute," Bellatrix yelled.

"I should go and let her in," Hermione said walking around Narcissa. She opened the door to find Bellatrix with her ear up against it. "Hear anything you like?"

"No, just mumbles," Bellatrix said pushing her aside to walk in, "Next time speak more clearly."

Hermione smirked and shut the door for them.

"You better not have told her anything," Bellatrix said advancing on her sister.

"Like what?" she calmly replied, "All your super dark secrets? I thought you knew me by now. You're a big girl now, you can decide when and who to trust with the reasons you are the way you are."

"Does Andy really want to see me," Bellatrix sat on the bed with her back to Narcissa.

"Yes," Narcissa replied.

"Is she mad?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Bellatrix, you kept questioning people like you want them to hate you, like you want to go back to Azkaban."

"I _don't_ want to go back to Azkaban," Bellatrix got a shiver in her voice.

Narcissa walked around to look at her, really look at her, "You know I've never seen you cry in my life."

Bellatrix looked at the ground and then slowly looked up at her sister with wide eyes full of tears.

"There's something about that girl, Bella. You better not mess this up because if you end up the way you were before, I believe it'll be far more worse than it was. It's time to create a new life. It's time to move on. But you can't do that until you confront the past."

"You sound just like her," Bellatrix whispered, her hands clamping the side of the bed. Narcissa sat down next to her and grabbed one of them.

"You're lucky they're even giving you a chance."

"I know…I _know_. And I don't understand it."

They sat there for a few minutes in silence before Bellatrix broke it, "Have you..talked to or heard from Rodolphus?"

"No. I haven't heard from any of Voldemort's followers. I don't really want to, and I don't think they want to hear from me either. I'm just trying to get our life, Draco's and mine, back to normal. It's why I let him come back here."

"You'll come back to see me, right?"

"Of course; every week, if I'm allowed."

Bellatrix got up and walked to a corner in the room, placing her hands on the walls. She was gasping, trying so hard not to break down, her face was contorted with anger and fear.

"What are you thinking," Narcissa asked.

"Everything," Bellatrix mumbled, clear and loud enough for Narcissa to understand, "If things were different, if I was born to a better pair of parents, if only just that, things would be different."

"I'm sorry things weren't different. I'm sorry you have to be here."

Bellatrix turned around, "No. You were just a little girl.."

"So were you!"

"NO! I could've…I _should've_ done something. I didn't protect you good enough. I was selfish and thought of myself first."

Narcissa shook her head, tears falling down her cheeks as she stared at her older sister, who still stubbornly held her tears back.

Bellatrix closed her eyes and breathed deeply letting out a long sigh, "As for being here, it's probably the best thing that has ever happened to me."

Narcissa walked over and hugged her.

"Do you really think she's special," Bellatrix asked her pulling away.

"There are more like her, we just haven't been around them much of our lives."

"How do you know you can trust them?"

"You don't know, but you can feel it."

"What does it feel like?"

"It feels like all the bad in the world are illusions, nightmares. And when you're with that person, the fact that some of those nightmares are actual realities doesn't matter, because as long as you have that one person you can truly trust with everything, anything is possible. You can even break free from the darkest, deepest of wells as long as you have that one person you can always count on, _always_."

"How do you know?"

"Because I've felt it."

"Who? Lucius?"

"No, Draco. My son and only child; it's a shame I have to count on him, and sometimes I don't know if he thinks he can count on me, but I try my best. I try to be the mother for him, the mother I wish we had growing up."

"I'm sorry I put you second to _him_."

"Don't keep blaming yourself, you'll never get better until you can forgive yourself for all the things you've done and said."

Narcissa hugged her again, "I've got to go, but I'll keep in touch with you, and I'll be back at the end of the week."

Bellatrix walked Narcissa to the front door and let her out. She watched her walk away and tried to follow her, but felt an excruciating shock trying to leave the room. She hissed loudly awaking sleeping Hermione on the couch. She shut the door and walked over.

Hermione rubbed her face and turned over to look up at Bellatrix, "Did your sister leave?"

"Yeah," Bellatrix kneeled down and smiled, "Does your head still hurt?"

Hermione closed her eyes again and murmured 'yes.'

Bellatrix picked her up and carried her to the bedroom covering her up and closing the curtains. She placed a cup of water on the bedside table and shut the door. She leaned again the door and shut her eyes concentrating on her breathing. After a minute, she reopened them and walked to the kitchen table to write a second entry in the Bellatrix Blog.


	15. Chapter 15

**I really appreciate your guys' reviews and favs and follows. You don't know how happy you make me; how you can just turn an okay day into an excellent day. That might sound lame, but it's true. I love my story and I don't ever feel bad writing it when I should be doing something else because it helps me learn new things about my field, even as I'm writing, I come up with new ideas to help and deal with kids like Bellatrix. It just inspires me, and I wish that everyone could be as patient and kind as Hermione is to people like Bellatrix, even if they're not insanely in love with them, and even if they don't look as sexy as Helena Bonham Carter made Bellatrix look. A person is a person, we all matter. **

**A special education teacher I was working with once told her class that there are no bad people in the world, just people that make bad choices. **

**That always reminds me of what Sirius told Harry, "You're not a bad person. You're a very good person that bad things have happened to. The world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."**

**Alexa: Hermione says, "DO YOUR HOMEWORK NOW!" Trust me, I need to be finishing up two projects due in five hours, but I'm sitting here writing all this. I appreciate that you think it needs more reviews and that. I was thinking about advertising for it on tumblr, but then I wasn't so sure I wanted to do that. I don't mind if anyone else does it, it just seems weird to advertise my own, only because … it just seems weird. I don't care if other people advertise their stuff, it's just a me problem. I might end up doing it someday, or soon. My tumblr name is all-kinds-of-minds, I don't post a lot, I mostly just like a lot of stuff.**

**Anyways, this is getting long and I need to get going and get things done. Enjoy!**

Bellatrix sat at the kitchen table staring at nothing with her hand on her chin.

Hermione didn't come out of the bedroom until around 4:45 P.M. Bellatrix and she have definitely changed roles this weekend.

"Feeling better yet," Bellatrix asked impatiently.

"What if I'm not," Hermione said walking over to her.

"I don't like the attitude you've suddenly gotten since this morning."

"You just don't like that you've got competition now." Hermione smiled as she walked around to sit next to Bellatrix who had the Bellatrix Blog opened in front of her.

"What's this," Hermione asked.

"Well….," Bellatrix started slowly. "I already wrote to you once, this morning, in here. But since your irresponsible attempts to have a fun time last night led to your sickness all day today, I wrote down a list of the major things in my life I believe I need to start talking about."

"Oh!.." Hermione looked at the list: Parents/Childhood, Rodolphus/Others, Tom Riddle, Azkaban, and Voldemort.

"Are you planning on talking about them soon?..." She noticed Bellatrix's body tighten as she looked away.

"You don't have to," Hermione said scooting closer, putting an arm around her, and holding one of her hands. "Don't rush things, please. If you do it before you're ready, you might have a really bad reaction afterwards. I don't want you to get hurt."

"Me? It's you I'm worried about! What if I black-out and do something to you?"

"Like what? Lie on top of me and yell in my face? Crucio me until I'm almost insane? Carve horrid names in my skin? I've already dealt with the worst of you, Bella. The worst you can do to me is kill me, and I honestly don't think even if a crazy state that you would do that now. Besides, I don't think you could ever do any of those things to me again, definitely not in your right mind. If you think about it, you weren't in your right mind at Malfoy Manor. No one is in their right mind when doing horrible things. Do you think people really _want_ to hurt and kill other people? You have to be seriously sick to actually go through with it."

"I feel like I've been sick my whole life. Secluded; no one paid attention to me, unless I was being punished. That goes for child and adulthood."

"Is that all you need is positive attention," Hermione smirked letting go of Bellatrix's hand and put her across her stomach rubbing slowly.

Bellatrix felt butterflies and gripped the edge of the table with both hands. Hermione pulled away a little then scooted her chair even closer. She leaned over the table in front of Bellatrix looking at the blog, turning the pages to her goals. She had "Talk to my sister" crossed out. She sighed deeply in thought with her chin in her hand still leaning in front of Bellatrix and blocking her view.

After a minute, Bellatrix got impatient, "…What are you doing…?"

"Thinking whether or not I want to put "Never got back to Azkaban" as a separate goal by itself because that will be ongoing as we discussed earlier. And then separate number two into three parts, second, third, and home, that way we'll have an even number, and we can cross out things faster."

"Why does it even matter?"

"Because I like lists. Haven't you ever made a list of things to do? I've made plenty of lists for homework over the years; I've even created some for Ron and Harry because they have poor memory and need me to do everything for them. It's just so much fun, and it feels so good to cross out something that you've gotten done and accomplished."

Bellatrix didn't say anything, but looked away.

"But, I'm not too sure about separating number two, because I feel, at least for me, once I get to one base, I'll want to go all the way…and not stop."

"I have no problem with that," Bellatrix answered quickly.

Hermione laughed a little, "Yeah I know."

"So what?"

"So…I just don't know. I've never done anything like that with anyone before, I've never felt the need to."

"So?"

"So it still scares me! Even though I, at least I hope, can trust you."

Now Bellatrix was the one scooting closer, "But you can. I won't hurt you, I won't do anything you don't want me to do, I won't continue if you want to stop. And I won't rush you, because you may not understand right now, but I understand your feelings and fear. And you might be surprised, but it makes me nervous, too….. I haven't been with anyone, Hermione, for 16 years. And to top it off, I've never in my life been with someone I actually cared about. And if I can cross off that goal and you're still okay with me, maybe things really can get better, because then I know at least someone would accept me."

"Okay with you? Bella, I'm more than okay with you! I told you, I will always be here for you, and I won't turn away. I might get mad sometimes, but that doesn't mean I'll stop loving you. Remember people, friends, get mad at each other all the time. I wouldn't be able to count on all the students in Hogwarts' hands how many times I've been upset with Ron and Harry. And they've been upset with each other, too, but they got over it. And what makes you think I won't accept you afterwards?"

"Just experiences," Bellatrix whispered.

"You're not comparing me with a low-life death eater?"

"N-no….You're right." Although Bellatrix still had the sound of uncertainty in her voice.

"I think we should wait until you can fully trust me, and that means talking to me about all those things you wrote down."

"Well that's a good motivator."

"And you don't have to feel the pressure, you can talk about things, and I'll talk about things. We can start with your parents and growing up, and I can tell you about my parents, and my growing up. Then we can wait. If you feel okay afterwards, maybe we can move on to something else."

"I'm just going to feel really stupid and selfish and like a baby for breaking down and crying."

"Don't feel that way! I understand you've had a lot of hardships in your life, even an idiot off the street that only knows you by Bellatrix Lestrange knows that. I won't judge you, remember. I won't tell a soul. Not even Ginny. No one, unless I have your permission."

Bellatrix thought for a moment about it. _Should I take a risk_, she thought. _If it turns out bad and she betrays me, I can finally see for myself that the so-called "good" side is just as bad as the "bad" side. No…I shouldn't think that way. Hermione wouldn't betray me… Would she?_

She turned to face Hermione and gave her a small smile, "Okay."

**This chapter is a little shorter than the others, but I already have the next five or six chapters planned out. They might be longer or shorter; probably longer. I'm thinking about making each chapter where Bella and Hermione talk about one thing from Bella's list. I'm getting pretty close to the part where I already have stuff written (about 8 chapters) and with some editing, I think they will work out.**

**Again, I appreciate those of you who read this. I hope you're all having a good end of the school year (if you go to school). I just did a final today and it's happy, yet sad, because I'll miss my professors..**


	16. Chapter 16

**I get these moments when I write and update a lot in one week, but then stop. I'm listening to Michael Jackson right now, that has nothing to do with anything.**

**Alexa: I'm glad I inspired you, that's truly an amazing feeling, and I was scared about posting my story, too, if you read the first chapter at the beginning, I was all defensive and stuff. But you just have to tell yourself that these people don't really know you, so if they have something negative to say, just ignore it. I haven't had any crazy reviews yet, I'm lucky. I'm surprised, because I really don't think my story is original. I've read other stories and these punks already have stories about what I'm thinking in my head, like wtf. Siriusly, double U, tee, eff. Why is it called double U when there are double V's?**

**Anyways, it's about to STORM where I am. It stormed all night last night, and we have a tornado watch where I am, whatever. I have to work tonight, only four hours. I don't work or have school tomorrow, so I'll probably write more of the story, but I should be working on my other projects. Monday morning is my last day. By 9 A.M., I will finally be done with my last full time semester of being an undergrad. It's so crazy. Think I said it in another chapter. I talk too much. Or I write too much.**

**I just starting vlogging for my friends today because I have social and anxiety problems, so I need to start talking out loud more. It's the reason I'm going into what I'm going into, because I understand.**

**No, I'm not as crazy as Bellatrix. She's such a clown, the neon crayon in a normal box.**

It was 7 P.M. on that same Saturday Narcissa Malfoy had come to visit. Hermione had just gotten back from sitting with Ginny and Ron in the Gryffindor common room. Ginny had received a depressing letter from her brother, George, about how much he misses their other brother, George's twin, Fred.

Hermione knew no one had forgotten about the many deaths that happened during the war. Right now, people were burying their memories to ease the pain, but what they didn't know is that buried pain harms more than when it's not.

Hermione had ideas of what Bellatrix had gone through growing up and being on the dark side, but nothing could prepare her really. She sat down across from Bellatrix who hadn't moved an inch since they last talked a few hours ago. Hermione grabbed her hands and Bellatrix slowly looked up at her with no expression.

"You tell me not to talk about things until I'm ready," Bellatrix said, "But I don't think I'll ever feel ready. So…I should…I really should get it over with." Bellatrix almost let out a cry, but held it back gasping for air. Hermione kept holding her hands, looking at her with sadness; she decided not to say one word until Bellatrix was completely done.

Bellatrix's face went from sad to angry in less than five seconds before she started talking again, "I was the first born. I was the oldest of my sisters, and I was supposed to take care of them, but I couldn't; not fully."

Bellatrix tightened her grip on Hermione's hands, "I was born on May 26, 1951. I know it's coming up, it doesn't matter. My father never liked celebrating our birthdays. They're just another day. My earliest memory was of _him_, my father. Speaking of birthdays, it was my fourth birthday. I had to share a room with my sister, Andromeda, who was two at the time. It was at night, and we were supposed to be fast asleep in our beds. Andromeda kept crying because my father was screaming at my mother for not being able to give him a son. She had just found out the gender of Narcissa. My father was ignorant and seriously believed because we were pure-bloods, my mother had the power to create whatever gender she wanted. I remember watching the clock and listening to them scream at each other, and I heard him slapping her and breaking furniture. I remember it was 6 A.M. and the sun was starting to come out; Andromeda had fallen asleep a few hours ago, thankfully, because my father hated hearing her cry, and even though she was just two, he wouldn't think twice about treating her the way he treated my mother. I heard him walking down the hallway, slamming his feet. I quickly shut my eyes and pretended to be asleep when he quickly opened the door to see if we were sleeping or awake. Just as quickly as he opened the door, he slammed it shut, and Andromeda stirred and started to whimper. I got out of bed, scared stiff I would get caught, and tried to calm her down. And that was my first memory."

It was hard to look Bellatrix in the eyes, but Hermione kept her head up and didn't wipe away any of her tears. Bellatrix talked to her as if these things happened in all families. She was so calm, like a robot.

"My mother was a coward," Bellatrix continued staring at Hermione's face, not blinking once, "She never protected us. She let him control her, and control us, in ways that made me wish I had killed myself a very long time ago. I always knew what kind of day I was going to have when my mother woke me up, just from the look on her face. We mostly had bad days, like walking on egg shells. My mother did pay more attention to Narcissa than me and Andromeda. At least Andromeda was able to sneak away into the forest behind our manor and read, or just, be away from it all."

Bellatrix finally took her eyes away from Hermione, and loosened her grip on her hands, but still held them. "I always knew my father hated me, especially me, because I was the oldest, but I was a female. I remember being so excited about going to Hogwarts, and being away from him."

Bellatrix laughed a little with her eyes tearing up, "You don't have to keep quiet through the whole thing."

Hermione opened her mouth a little, but just sighed.

"I'm going to tell you something, Hermione, something that no one else knows, not even my sisters."

"You can trust me," Hermione whispered squeezing Bellatrix's hands.

"I was 11 years old the night before my first time going to Hogwarts. I was still awake, too excited to go to sleep, in my bed. My mother was already sleeping, and my father always stayed up late. He came into my room and said he had something for me, a present for my first year at Hogwarts. I smiled inside, thinking maybe my father did love me. I knew something was wrong when he pulled my gown up and underwear off. I was too young and I didn't understand anything he was doing. After he pulled his pants and underwear down, he covered my mouth with one of his large hands, and I'm sure after he was through with me, his hand was soaked of my tears. He whispered in my ear, "Now you'll always be mine, and no one will ever want you." It happened every time I came back from school, up until I was engaged to Rodolphus in my 6th year."

Hermione felt sick to her stomach, "You…you never told _anyone_?"

"No," Bellatrix said, "I don't know why I was singled out, I just was. I never told my mum, I learned that telling her things just made it all worse."

Bellatrix gasped and got up turning her back to Hermione, "I feel so ashamed and dirty talking about this out loud. Like now, because of that, no one ever really will love me, not fully, because of what he did."

Bellatrix still had her back to Hermione.

"Don't," Hermione cried walking over to her, "You're beautiful, there's nothing you can tell me about yourself to change my mind."

"I'm going to tell you something else, something else I haven't told anyone, not _anyone_."

"Go on," Hermione nodded grabbing Bellatrix's hands again.

"I got pregnant. Three times. Those were the only times I went to any kind of muggle place. I got three abortions. I didn't know what else to do. And even though I was torturing and killing so many people during my time with Voldemort, I killed myself inside for those three babies. But it wouldn't have been right for them to be born, to be born of incest, to someone like me who wouldn't be able to take care of them. They'd end up at the orphanage because I know my parents wouldn't help. My father would call me a slut, I know he would, even though it was his fault. Not mine. He always told me it was all my fault, everything. But not no more." Bellatrix got that evil look in her eyes staring off into the distance.

She came out of her daze and hugged Hermione. She let out a huge sigh, "Thank you for letting me tell you all these things."

Hermione had her face down on Bellatrix's shoulder and was still crying, "Please don't feel like you have to stop because I'm such a big baby."

Bellatrix smelled her hair and rubbed her back, "You're not a big baby; you're the best person I know. But all this crying can't be healthy, so turn that frown upside down."

"I can't!" Hermione shouted lifting her head up, still gasping and crying.

"Shhh," Bellatrix took Hermione's face in her hands and wiped away her tears with her thumbs before kissing her fully on the lips. Hermione wrapped her arms around Bellatrix's neck as Bellatrix moved to her cheek and neck. "You're the only person I've felt 100% safe with."

"Are…Are _you_ okay? I mean, how does it feel getting all that off your chest now?"

"I was afraid you would reject me because of it, but now that I see you're not…I guess I feel….relieved. So relieved, I don't believe this isn't just some sort of dream."

"Why would I reject you? You did nothing wrong," Hermione put a hand on Bellatrix's cheek, "Always remember, there's nothing you can do or tell me that can change the way I feel about you."

"But I'm still a horrible Death Eater that wants to kill, because I just feel this tension, and I hate it, and I don't know what else to do!"

"You're not a Death Eater anymore," Hermione lifted up her left sleeve and they both looked at the faded Dark Mark, "You're not Bellatrix Lestrange anymore. You are Bellatrix Black, a woman with a second chance. And I believe you have the ability to get better, so that's why I'm never going to leave you."

"Why are you so fucking crazy," Bellatrix half laughed, half cried putting her arms around Hermione's neck.

"Ron says you and I are both mental, that's why we understand each other so much."

"I think the weasel is right."

Hermione smiled and kissed her, deeply and passionately, and she meant it. She made a mental note to always give Bellatrix more affection now, and real affection, not fake. She didn't want Bellatrix to think Hermione only did it for her own pleasure, or because she admired Bellatrix's body, because she was more than that. She _is_ more than that. She is a person, who was on the wrong path for a while, but now she has a chance at happiness. Everyone does.

Bellatrix hugged Hermione tightly and cried to her, "Thank you. Thank you for believing in me when no one, not even I, does."

Bellatrix had finally went to sleep. Hermione was glad. She sat on the bed watching her sleep, looking so peaceful. She wondered what other dark secrets Bellatrix was willing to tell her. But she would wait until Bellatrix was ready, or since she said she never felt ready, whenever she did end up talking more. It made her think, _Did Bellatrix not have one happy memory in her past? Is that why Azkaban messed her up more than the others, because she had no happy memory to defend herself with?_

It made Hermione want to cry, but she knew Bellatrix wouldn't want that. She told herself to think positive and closed her eyes breathing slowly. Bellatrix Lestrange (Black) had told her, Hermione Granger, one of her deepest secrets that no one else in the world knew. She had put her trust in the last person she thought she ever would: a muggle-born.

It had only been two weeks since Voldemort was defeated and so much has happened. It's amazing how much just a little bit of kindness can help change a person for the better. Bellatrix was a miracle in Hermione's eyes, and she couldn't wait to show the world that love really does conquer all.


	17. Chapter 17

**Terrorize: I appreciate you reviewing! I will go and read your fic! I know, I hate myself, too. Sadly, a lot of these things that happened to Bella in chapter 16 and future chapters have even happened to me or one of my friends. I can't leave Bella alone, not after she's been alone for 14 years. I have to make Hermione have a sensitive soul. **

**Cha1890: That's very good information! I knew there was probably a good reason for it.**

**LoveSKINS94: I appreciate all your reviewing! It keeps me going!**

**Alexa: You make me feel like a famous person, haha. Thank you! I actually, sadly, have experienced being sexually abused when I was very young, even younger than Bella. The way of just saying it like a robot and trying not to break down or show any emotion was exactly how I was when I told my mom about it. A lot of what Bella has gone through, and is going through, I've either experienced it or I've seen it in the kids I work with. I am excited for you and your story!**

_Sunday May 17, 1998 12:30 A.M._

_It must be hard to care about people when you've grown up with no one reciprocating the feelings. We all feel the need to be loved. It's a part of surviving._

_I told you Narcissa and Draco would come along. They do care about you. Not everyone in the world is a broken soul with no skill of loving._

_You leave that boy that called me a mudblood alone. I don't care what he thinks. Just let it go. Please._

_You need to find a new outlet for your anger. You need to learn to calm yourself. And I know it's hard, because people are all born with different personalities and temperaments, and grow up in different environments. But you can do it. I know you can, and I will help you the whole way._

_You may still have that darkness inside of you, but if you can act it, you can feel it, you can do it. Everyone has the ability to love and to hate. You are a great person, Bella, because I've seen and heard the way you care so much about your sister. The way you talked to me about your other sister, and taking care of her, and how you should've done more, and your parents…you wished they would've been more loving towards you, you need it, you crave it, we all do. You will feel better if you give love, and you will receive it. Look how I've treated you since you've come here, and you totally turned your perspective of me around, and now you actually care about me. We care about each other, and it doesn't have to be just us. You can love and care about others, too, (in a friendly sense, because I'm selfish and want you all to myself) because isn't it so much better than having to be ordered around by a power-hungry man?_

_My love is NOT temporary, my sweet Bella dear. I'm not a flake. _

_My parents know very little about our world. They don't hate you. They're just scared for me._

_We're both humans, we both feel needy and want attention sometimes. I just need you because ever since you told me you loved me, like really loved me, I've wanted more, and I couldn't bear to have you stop loving me._

_I do have people, but they don't always understand me. Like they don't all understand why I'm here with you, even you don't understand it. But I love you. And don't ever think twice about it._

Hermione, trying not to wake Bellatrix, pulled the sheets back from the other side of her bed and got in snuggling close to her. They were facing each other, and Bellatrix opened her eyes for a split second and grabbed Hermione tightly to her like a stuffed animal. Hermione still felt extremely sad about what Bellatrix had told her. She tried really hard not to cry out loud; she at least still allowed a tear or two fall from her eyes before closing them. Bellatrix was right. It was really hard to handle hearing about the things she went through. She was a sobbing emotional mess, just like Bellatrix said she would be, but could she blame her? Well, Bellatrix couldn't, because it was all she knew.

She wanted to get up and go walk around the dark castle and think about everything, but Bellatrix was comfortable with her in her arms.

"I love you," Hermione whispered softly to her.

Bellatrix kept her eyes closed and mumbled something.

"What," Hermione whispered back.

"More than life itself," Bellatrix said still with her eyes closed, "I love you more than life itself."

Hermione let tears fall from her eyes again from complete happiness. How can this woman possibly love _her_? She was only giving her the attention she so needed. She wouldn't stop if someone else were to come along and give her attention, would she?

Hermione let out a sigh, a little too loud than she had planned.

"Ssshhhhut up," Bellatrix _still_ with her eyes closed, but still smirked, said to Hermione, "It's okay. It's okay now."

Hermione wasn't too sure if it really was okay, and she was right when she woke up the next morning with Bellatrix still gripping her like a teddy bear. Except this time she seemed to be having one of those post-traumatic episodes, and was digging her nails into Hermione's back.

She felt bad yelling, "Ahhh, Bella, stop!" She grabbed Bellatrix's arm and shoved her away a little while sitting up. Bellatrix opened her eyes unaware of what was wrong, then remembered the dream she was having. She watched as Hermione tried rubbing her back with a pained look on her face.

"Oh…," Bellatrix pulled her towards her, "Oh no, let me look." She sat up on the bed with Hermione sitting in front of her with her back faced towards Bellatrix. Bellatrix carefully pulled up the back of Hermione's shirt and saw the four indents of her nails where punctured skin was allowing a little blood to slowly pour out each one.

"What is it with you and nails?" Hermione asked, laughing a little to let Bellatrix know she wasn't mad at her, "Are they your second weapon after your wand?"

"I can fix this, quickly, but I'd need a wand."

"It's in the bedside table drawer."

Bellatrix quickly leaned over to grab Hermione's wand, surprised she was so nonchalant about continuously letting her use her wand for random things when she could easily use it to get out of the castle. After muttering some spell to heal the wounds, she put the wand away where she found it and went back to paying attention to the soft and warm skin of Hermione's back.

"Maybe…if you want, you can start sleeping in your dorm again, or on the couch," Bellatrix said.

"I'm fine here with you. Don't worry about it, it was nothing, an accident," Hermione said turning around to look at her.

"But…what if…"

"Don't worry," Hermione laughed, "I always wake up in time before the worst can happen."

Bellatrix half smiled at her.

"Do you want to talk about it, your dream, I mean?"

"No, it was just another stupid Azkaban dream, nothing important."

Hermione was going to ask her to elaborate, but decided to wait on it until they finally got to the Azkaban part of Bellatrix's life.

Bellatrix pulled her back to lay down on the bed facing each other as they did when they went to sleep, only this time eyes opening staring at each other.

"Tell me about _your_ crazy childhood," Bellatrix said scooting closer and wrapping her arms around her again.

"I was born on September 19, 1979," Hermione started, "I was the only child. My parents were both dentists, muggle teeth doctors. I was alone a lot. There aren't a lot of interesting things, or anything that sticks out, from my childhood, at least not until I went to Hogwarts."

"Tell me about your time at Hogwarts," Bellatrix asked Hermione like she was asking her to tell her as story.

"Well, like everyone else, I was 11 when I got my letter from Hogwarts. My parents thought it was some sort of stupid prank, until Professor McGonagall showed up at our doorstep giving us proof, much to my parents' dismay. I was somewhat excited. I studied before I even got on the train, just so I could fit in with my peers, but I ended up looking like a show-off, a know-it-all, and not a lot of kids liked me at first. It made me upset, and I thought I would never really fit in, because I was a muggle-born. With no one to turn to, I would cry in the girls' bathroom a lot. A troll had gotten in the castle one night somehow and made its way to my location. Thankfully I was saved by Harry and Ron. That's when things started to get better. Second year, I was petrified by that damn basilisk snake in the chamber of secrets. Third year, you wouldn't like, there were dementors patrolling the grounds because Sirius, your cousin, had escaped Azkaban."

"Bloody bastard didn't even help me out," Bellatrix cut in.

"That's the year I punched Draco in the face, because he's an ass. Harry found out Sirius was his godfather, and that Peter Pettigrew had used Polyjuice Potion to be Sirius."

"_Pettigrew_. Always a fucking coward."

"Fourth year was the Triwizard Tournament, the year that Voldemort came back, right at the very end. And no one believed Harry. Except Dumbledore, Ron, and I, and a few others. It wasn't until the end of fifth year, at the Department of Mysteries when the Minister of Magic actually _saw_ Voldemort himself. It was five minutes after you left. You and your cackling self….Harry was so upset, he wanted to kill you, even more than he wanted to kill Voldemort. But not anymore, Dumbledore has taught him how to forgive, even when it seems unbearably hard. Sixth year was nothing important, except when Snape killed Dumbledore. That's when Harry, Ron, and I went searching for the Horcruxes. It was annoying; Harry and Ron got into another one of their fights. But Ron came back, he always does. And well, things happened and we somehow ended up at Malfoy Manor, you know what happens there. Then, I used Polyjuice Potion with your hair to get into your vault…"

"What?!"

"I wasn't lying when I said we didn't take anything. Because then we hadn't, but you gave it away by being crazy, so we went in and found the other Horcrux."

"You sly little devil. How was it being me?"

"Hard, very hard. I was fooling myself trying to act assertive and forceful."

"I wish I would've been there to see that," Bellatrix laughed loudly.

"Then we went to Hogwarts, and all that blah blah blah and stuff and you know."

"And even after all that shit you went through, you still came to me."

"Yeah, it's _such_ a mystery," Hermione smiled put her hand on Bellatrix's cheek.

"It seriously is though."

"To you it is, but to me, it's as easy as breathing."

Bellatrix let out a sigh and closed her eyes with a pained look on her face. Hermione leaned closer to her and gave her light kisses on her lips and cheek. She squeezed her tightly, "My shweet wittle Bewwa." Hermione stood up on the bed and hopped over Bellatrix onto the floor. "Come on, get up." She tried pulling the sheets off Bellatrix, but failed.

"I'm not sweet," Bellatrix replied pulling the sheets over her head.

"Okay, I know, sweet and sour." Hermione climbed on top of Bellatrix and yanked the sheet off her head.

"What am I, food to you?"

"You're gonna be if you don't get out of this bed and come eat some breakfast with me. You don't want me to sit there all alone, do you?"

"You've done it before." Bellatrix pulled the sheet back over her head.

Hermione growled a little while getting off her. She stared at her and then smirked as she walked around the other side of the bed and picked up her wand. She waved it around and the sheets around Bellatrix ripped in half.

"Hey!" Bellatrix yelled finally sitting up, "Stop destroying my stuff!"

"It's not your stuff, it's our stuff. And I didn't do anything worse than what you've done." Hermione walked over to Bellatrix's side.

"I don't want to get up, Hermione," Bellatrix said softly looking up at her with her big brown eyes and pouty lips, "I just don't feel like doing anything today."

"Awww…..Come on," Hermione grabbed her up off the bed.

"I hate you, I fucking hate you," Bellatrix had her hands around Hermione leaning against her back as they walked out of the room to the kitchen. "This isn't fair; I let you sleep when you were hung over."

"I'll let you go back to bed after you eat something."

"Why couldn't you just bring me food?"

"Because I'm not your slave, and you need to get up and move around." Hermione hugged her close to her and spun her around.

"Fine, I'll have some orange juice."

"And some toast."

"You can't force feed me."

"I can do whatever I want," Hermione pulled back and winked at her before walking more towards the kitchen.

"You know what I heard?" Bellatrix sat down at the table.

"No what," Hermione was getting out the bread and toaster.

"I heard that if you make your children eat everything off their plate even when they say they aren't hungry, they grow up to never learn when to stop eating. They'll eat even when they're not hungry."

"Well you're not my child, you're way more than that, and I think you can handle over-eating, especially with me around to watch you like a hawk. Here, one piece of toast and orange juice. You can go back to bed if you like afterwards."

"What about you?"

"What about me?" Hermione sat down across from Bellatrix eating her own toast with orange juice. She grabbed the Bellatrix Blog and opened it to one of the pages and crossed out where Bellatrix wrote 'Parents/Childhood.'

"You don't want to come back to bed?"

"I'm not tired. Whatever would we do in that bed besides sleep, Bellatrix?"

They both smirked at each other.

"Okay, I'm not really tired," Bellatrix confessed, "I just wanted you to stay with me."

Hermione gave her a big smile and shoved the blog, juice, and toast to the other side of the table. She got up and walked around to sit next to Bellatrix super close and wrapped an arm around her.

Bellatrix turned towards her slowly, "I….I…." She gasped turning away feeling those stupid tears creep up again in her eyes.

Hermione gently rubbed her back, "What's wrong?"

Bellatrix turned back towards her, "Nothing, that's just it. You're so gentle and caring with me, Hermione. You're so warm, and your skin is so soft. It's just…."

"What?"

"I've never been with someone who was so gentle with me, who loved me, and cared about how I felt. I don't want you to go away, I need you."

"I know, and I need you, we need each other, and I'm not going away. You aren't either."

"I'm starting to not mind stay in this room forever, as long as you're here with me."

"Wow, Bellatrix, this has all made a big impression on you, hasn't it?"

"Not all this, just you."

They finished their toast and orange juice and decided to go walking around the castle together. Hermione took them to the Gryffindor common room where Bellatrix sniffed and shrugged not caring at all. She was happy to see Ginny there, and it made her feel like she was one of them. She felt like a teenager again conversing with the red-headed girl who so easily warmed up to her like she was one of them.

When they went back to Bellatrix's room, Bellatrix turned around to say something to Hermione.

"Go on," Hermione said seeing the expression on her face.

"I….," Bellatrix huffed and yelled at herself for stuttering and stammering when talking to Hermione, she needed her firm voice back. She took in a deep breath and let it out. "I want to talk about my stupid , good-for-nothing husband now, and his minions."

"Okay," Hermione went over and sat in one of the loveseats with her legs folded up waiting for Bellatrix.

Bellatrix quickly walked over to the couch and sat down, nervously rubbing her hands on the coffee table.

"Well, as you know, I got engaged to Rodolphus in my 6th year here," Bellatrix began confidently. "He was just like any other Slytherin boy, just like Lucius Malfoy. But I was like them, too. I wasn't too keen on marrying him, it was sort of a family set up. He was more excited than I was and clung onto me like a lost puppy. When we got married, everything was fake. We never acted like a married couple. We never kissed. We never hugged. We had a lot of sex, but it was just for our own pleasure. That was in the beginning."

Bellatrix started biting her nails and turned away while she continued, "When we became Death Eaters, he had them come over all the time. And they would get drunk and do all sorts of stupid things, like bring home animals they found, or random muggles, and torture them to no end. I was never part of it, or at least I didn't want to be. They got me drunk a lot, even though I didn't want to. He and his stupid friends would gang up on me."

Bellatrix looked over at Hermione and gasped, "I don't know what's worse: being raped repeatedly by your own father, or being raped repeatedly by your own husband, AND his filthy drunken friends."

She looked away after seeing the look of horror on Hermione's face, "And every time I woke up, EVERY TIME, Rod would always tell me I must've been dreaming. And then I stopped drinking, but they'd somehow slip something into my cup. Then I'd stop drinking ANYTHING around them, but it wouldn't matter anymore. Because I was a crazy bitch; who knows what other kinds of things I think I see?"

"I would never do that to you," Hermione cried getting up and sitting next to her.

"I know you wouldn't," Bellatrix said hugging her, "I just…" She took another deep breath. "But I got my revenge, of course. Some of them 'disappeared.' God damn Rodolphus, I'll still kill him when I have the chance."

Hermione didn't say anything; she actually wanted Bellatrix to kill him. She was feeling the revenge just like Bellatrix was. She wasn't ashamed. He deserved every bit of torture. She kissed Bellatrix's lips and cheeks and whispered to her, "Don't worry, I'm not like him. I love you."

"You know I've never told anyone these things," Bellatrix gasped hugging Hermione tighter. "You're so special to me. I love you, more than anyone."

Hermione went straight to bed after that because she had classes early the next morning. Bellatrix stayed up and thought about everything that has happened since her Dark Lord was defeated. Things have gotten so much better, not that things were good at all in the first place. _Where was Hermione when I was her age?_

Bellatrix knew that the worst of her past had been told to Hermione. Azkaban wasn't as bad as some make it seem, even though 14 years does make a huge difference. Voldemort was, well, Voldemort.

She stayed up all night watching the muggle T.V. beginning to enjoy the muggle things Hermione had gotten her. She was thankful for everything and everyone she had met since coming here. Though she did still have the dark side to her, as Hermione said we all do.

_Hermione, such a wise, young girl. The brightest witch of her age. The nicest, most patient, and loving witch I can call mine. Mine, to protect me from the bad things._


	18. Chapter 18

**Alexa: Each and every one of your reviews means a whole lot to me, even if you are a complete stranger. Maybe not a lot of people really care too much about my story, but if I can reach out to one person and maybe make a little difference, I believe it is all worth it. **

**I didn't plan on this when I first started my Bellamione fic, and when I posted the first chapter. I didn't think that I would end up using it to get to people, and help them understand the kind of kids I work with and am going to school for.**

**I don't think people really know what emotional impairment really is. And I wish I had the voice to tell them, but I'm so shy, and I stutter and stammer and forget everything.**

**There's an interesting quote I read in the book I'm reading right now…**

**"The cars slowed as they made their approach along Michigan Avenue, and fingers emerged from the rolled-down windows, gesturing at Eloise's buildings behind the fences. Often the fingers belonged to parents, and the parents were saying to their beautiful kids, there, that's where the crazy people go, that's where you might end up if you don't behave." ******

**Beginning of Ch. 14 One of the Thousands in****Steve Luxenberg****'s**** Annie's Ghosts******

**It's sad, because even if kids do behave, and it's not always their own fault, some of them will end up in day treatment centers or juvenile detention centers (since most mental institutions have been closed; although there are psychiatric centers around, but they are basically the same thing, just run a little different now that times are a bit different).******

**I think I'm going to start vlogging about my major (Special Education - Emotional Impairment). Whenever I tell people I'm going into Special Education, I think they all immediately think of kids that suffer from mental retardation (or now what Michigan calls it, Cognitive Impairment). ******

**But it's not that, it's totally different, and I want people to know and be aware.**

**But I talk (write) too much, if only I knew how to talk this way fluidly out loud without stopping and…it being awkward…**

The next day Bellatrix sat alone in the living room with the T.V. on again. She sat cross-legged with a bowl of cereal in her lap, the only thing she could remember how to make. She knew how to make toast, but she was too scared to use the toaster, and would rather have used her wand to cook the bread.

Her phone went off right at the exact time Hermione's last class ended at 12:30 revealing a text message from the young girl.

Hermione: I'm going to be back an hour late, sorry. Detention.

Bellatrix: Hermione Granger in detention? You're a liar.

Hermione: No, I wish I was. I'll explain later.

Bellatrix tossed her phone to the side and continued watching T.V. and eating her cereal. _Why would Hermione be in detention_? She wondered. _Has she ever even been in detention before? What would she get detention for? She always does her homework, even with me sitting next to her acting like a hormonal teenage boy. Was she late to class? No, why would she be? Was it something to do with her? It probably was._

"Fucking son of a bitch, Bellatrix," she said to herself, "You'll never learn." She got up and threw the rest of her cereal away not feeling hungry anymore. She opened the Bellatrix Blog and scratched out 'Rodolphus/Others' until all the letters were covered in black ink. She scratched so hard she went through the paper and onto the kitchen table, but was able to quickly make the ink disappear by rubbing it with her finger.

She turned a few pages and found Hermione's entry from the day before written almost exactly 24 hours ago. She read through it and thought she might as well reply with nothing else to do but wait for her to come back.

_Monday May 18, 1998 12:30 A.M._

_It's hard to care about people, you're right. It's easy to care about you, and Narcissa. And…I do care, and miss, Andromeda._

_I know they both care about me, and I know you do, too. I don't know about Draco. I was pretty rotten to him after I broke out of prison. I was rotten to everyone, even Narcissa… HE was the only one I respected.._

_And thanks for reminding me about that boy that called you a mudblood, I'll put him on my death list._

_You're so wise. Such a wise owl. You understand people grow up differently, and think differently, and that some things will be harder for others, or easier for others. Why isn't everyone like you? Why is everyone so quick to judge and hate? Because it's so easy, and so simple. I know because that's how the Dark Lord and Death Eaters operated._

_Voldemort didn't have the ability to love. At least no one believed he did. He grew up in a shitty orphanage, and no one gave him the attention he needed; like you're giving me the attention I need._

_I love your possessiveness of me. It makes me feel like a teenager again. You make me feel young._

_My love for you isn't temporary either. I've been arguing with myself about it, but I think that because I've never felt this way about anyone before, it can't be fake._

_I have the feeling I'm going to end up having to meet your parents someday. And it will be different for me._

_What am I, a drug to you? I am way more sour than I am sweet. Maybe sour on the outside, and sweet on the inside, like a piece of candy. Oh, so I am food now, eh! Food just for you, love._

Bellatrix put the blog aside got extremely bored. She laid on the couch looking through her phone contacts again and texted Ginny for the first time.

Bellatrix: Why is Hermione in detention?

Ginny: Because she has a female boner for you.

Bellatrix: What gives you that idea?...

Ginny: Don't worry, I won't say anything, I know you two are madly in love.

Bellatrix: Well get to the point, then. Why is she in detention?

Ginny: I told you already.

Bellatrix: So it is because of me… I make things worse without even trying.

Ginny: Oh no, it's not your fault. She just needed to rebel for a bit.

Bellatrix: What happened?

Ginny: I'll let her tell you.

Bellatrix: But I'm so bored! You should come over.

Ginny: No can do, not without Hermione in there, you might go crazy and kill me.

Bellatix: I'll only smack you around.

Ginny: Wish I could, I really do, soon maybe.

Bellatrix: You are not fun. Why not be brave like a good little Gryffindor and come play with me?

Ginny: I don't want to be in detention with Hermione, she's pretty pissed off right now. And we're not just brave, we're more than that….stupid evil Slytherin.

Bellatrix: Pissed? At me?

Ginny: Oh no, don't worry, you're not in trouble.

Bellatrix: I feel like I am.

Ginny: Well you are, just not with Hermione.

Bellatrix: She's the only one that matters.

Bellatrix felt more normal and human and less in trouble talking to Ginny. Ginny was so easy to talk to. She was lucky Hermione's red-haired friend wasn't easily angered like most red-heads.

Around 1:45 P.M., the door swung open and Hermione and Draco walked in.

They both walked to the kitchen while Bellatrix sat up on the couch and watched them.

"Don't tell her, she'll go crazy, she _is_ crazy," Draco whispered frantically to Hermione grabbing her arm.

Bellatrix quickly got up and walked over to them, "What's going on?"

"You don't have to stay, Draco, I'm fine," Hermione said through gritted teeth.

"Fine," he let go of her arm and looked at his aunt before walking out of the suite.

"So," Bellatrix said slowly walking more towards Hermione, "Why was the great Hermione Granger in detention?"

Hermione laughed and turned around to look at her, "The first time I've ever been in detention, and I don't count the times I was in "detention" with dumbass Dolores Umbridge."

"I hated that woman."

"Me too."

"So, I got you in trouble?"

"No, Ginny told me you talked to her, which is good, it's good to talk to people other than me. But anyways, I just got in a fight."

"A fight? Like a duel?"

"No, like a fight, a physical fight. I think I blacked out or something because I don't remember any of it, I just remember yelling at Pansy Parkinson."

"Pansy? What kind of stupid name is that? You got in a fight with a flower?"

"She's definitely not a flower. She's a Slytherin…an evil, stupid, annoying Slytherin. She's friends with Draco. And I felt bad because Draco was kind of stuck in the middle of it all."

"Well what happened? What do I have to do with it? Am I just rubbing off on you?"

"She's in all my classes, and was making a lot of comments about you and me throughout both of them today, and I just snapped in our last class."

"What did she say?"

"She said you were a coward for giving up to us, and a fake, and that we've probably brainwashed you to actually work with an arrogant mudblood like me. She kept badgering Draco, too, about why his aunt is so crazy. Bellatrix, she just wouldn't shut up. I mean, I can take a comment or two or even three, but it was throughout the whole first class and most of the second class. She said the only reason Voldemort kept you as a Death Eater and the only reason you were so loyal so him was so he could use you for sexual pleasure."

"That's not true. Sure I tried to get with him before I went to Azkaban when he looked _normal_, but it never worked. He wasn't like that, he didn't feel like he needed any sexual pleasure. He was…different."

Hermione held herself and jumped when she heard a hard knocking on the door. She sighed and walked over to open it.

"Professor McGonagall," she said with an exasperated look on her face, "Are you here to lecture me?"

"No…May I come in Ms. Granger?" Professor McGonagall walked in and Hermione shut the door. "I'm afraid I have some bad news. This is really hard, and I know you're going to hate it Ms. Black, but we need you to return to Azkaban…"

"WAIT WHAT?!" Hermione shouted, Bellatrix not saying anything, but just standing there with a scared look on her face, "If it's because of what I did.."

"No, Hermione, it's not because of your fight with Ms. Parkinson," Professor McGonagall cut in, "The law that allows us to let death eaters be in the rehabilitation program has only just officially started today, and they need Bellatrix to make up for the time when she should have been there in the first place."

"So..she'll come back?"

"She's only going to be there a week."

"A week?!"

"They wanted her to stay there for two weeks, but I got them to cut it in half, be thankful!"

Hermione shook her head and looked at Bellatrix.

"It's okay," Bellatrix said expressionless, "I'll go."

"This isn't fair, Professor! She doesn't need to be there, she _needs_ to be here!"

"I have done all I can, I am sorry! I will give you two five minutes to say goodbye to each other, and then I will apparate with Bellatrix to Azkaban. She'll be back this time next Monday."

"This is so unfair!" Hermione yelled after Professor McGonagall left the suite.

"It's okay," Bellatrix said walking over to her and hugging her, "Really, see this way, at least I know I'll be leaving, and I won't be there forever, I'll come back to you."

"But.." Hermione whimpered.

"But what?"

Hermione just turned her head away and held her tightly.

"You think I'm going to turn back into crazy Bellatrix Lestrange and forget about you?"

Hermione answered with a cry.

"No, I'm not," Bellatrix reassured her, "This is different, Hermione, I'm coming back. And it'll be good for you to not have to babysit me for a week."

"But I like babysitting you."

"Just promise me that you'll ignore that Posey, Daisy, Rose, whatever flower her name is. Don't let me get you in trouble."

"Pansy. And you can't blame me for wanting revenge like you always do."

"Don't worry, I'll take care of her later."

Hermione pulled away and gave Bellatrix a look, "We're not really getting revenge."

"No, _we're_ not."

Bellatrix smiled and pulled Hermione back to her. Hermione turned her face into Bellatrix's neck and saw her old Azkaban tattoo behind her ear. She gave it a long kiss.

Bellatrix pried away from Hermione when Professor McGonagall came back inside.

"She'll be fine, Hermione, I promise," Professor McGonagall told her, "I'm going to visit her every day."

"Why can't I visit her every day?"

"No," Bellatrix and McGonagall said at the same time.

"It's…," Hermione started.

"Don't say it," Bellatrix interrupted her, "It's not unfair. I shouldn't even be out of Azkaban. I'm lucky. I'll be fine, dear."

Bellatrix kissed her forehead and patted her cheek before offering her arm to Professor McGonagall.

Hermione started crying out loud with a stream of tears the second they apparated. She slowly walked over to the couch and looked at the T.V. that was still on. She sat down and cried texting Ginny about what had happened. Ginny immediately went over to be with her. Later, Hermione was alone still on the couch with the T.V. on, and saw Bellatrix's phone on the table. She picked it up and began looking through it. She read her conversation with Ginny and laughed. She looked through Bellatrix's pictures and found a lot of them were just pictures of Hermione sleeping.

She wished Bellatrix had taken her phone with her, then maybe she could still talk to her. She didn't know how she was going to get through the week. These feelings verified how in love and attached to Bellatrix she really was. She felt like one of those stupid girls that were away from their boyfriends for an hour.

She was okay for the week. Ginny and Luna got her out of the room and she spent a lot more time with Harry and Ron, and they reminisced.

But every night, sleeping in her old bed in the Gryffindor girl dorms, she found herself wondering what Bellatrix was doing; probably nothing. She had heard a lot of stories about Azkaban. Sirius never liked talking about it. Sirius was in there for a very long time, and he was fine, but he had happy memories. Hermione could only hope that the memories she made with Bellatrix these past few weeks would help Bellatrix get through the week. She told herself that she was going to spoil Bellatrix when she came back, with affection and everything else. Her birthday was going to be so close when she came back.

She talked to Narcissa about it. Narcissa even came and visited Hermione that Friday. They talked for a few hours about Bellatrix. She told her about how when they were younger, Bellatrix would purposely piss off their father just so he would leave Narcissa and Andromeda alone. She also took the beating for them. Narcissa said that was the reason she stayed with Bellatrix all this time, because she knew she was always safe, and that if Bellatrix loved anyone while working with Voldemort, it would have been Narcissa.

It was 1 P.M. the next Monday, and Bellatrix was supposed to be brought back by Professor McGonagall at 2 P.M. Hermione sat in Bellatrix's suite sitting on the couch staring at the T.V. just as Bellatrix did a week ago waiting for Hermione. She thanked whatever power there was that the week had gone by quickly. She laid down and closed her eyes thinking about how herself one year ago would call herself today crazy. She smiled.


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks for the reviews guys! Even if it's the same thing each time, I love it, haha. And I'll keep telling you that!**

**LoveSKINS94: Hermione is secretly a badass. I think it's easier for her to get in a fight for Bella than to get in a fight for Ron or Harry because they're guys and can handle their own. If Hermione doesn't take care of business, Bellatrix will, and Hermione doesn't want that, haha.**

**Alexa: Your words amaze me, and I am truly thankful for your prayers and reviews. I know how hard it is to deal with anxiety. We all have something hard we have to deal with in our life. No one really has it worse than another, because certain people can handle different things better or worse than other people can. Don't worry about reviewing/reading late. My best friend came down and stayed with me unexpectedly for a few days and just left, so I spent my time with him instead of writing; which is good, because before I start writing a new chapter, I usually think about the scenarios in my head a bunch of times so I have an idea where to go. I know it's hard to open up to people. Last night, I got drunk with my best friend and we were talking about things, and even with him (who've I've known for almost 15 years), it's hard to open up sometimes, because you just naturally feel stupid or ashamed, even though I know he would never judge me in the wrong way. It's just a human thing. You will get better as you get older with your anxiety if you can find something to cure it, be it writing, music, or some sort of aspiration (as long as it isn't harmful to you like alcoholism, and I've almost gone down that road a few times, sometimes I think I still am, but I know deep down I would never really let myself get that far). Thanks again for everything and all the reviews, and don't hesitate to private message me if you need anything, or just someone to talk to, someone to tell something to that won't tell anyone else.**

**Kigo stories: Thank you! Yeah, they're pretty much attached like super glue. I was thinking about having something about a connection with their wands, because they both have Dragon heartstring (that's kind of like Harry and Voldemort, but not as cool, but whatever, we'll see).**

** : I don't want you guys to be sad! I'll keep writing, even if it takes me a week to update sometimes. Right now, I'm on vacation from school and work. Then I have one class in the Spring semester, then I'm just working during the summer, so I should be good for a while. I honestly have no idea how I'm going to end this, if I ever will, I don't want to end it! But I'm sure I'll find a good way, someday…**

A hard knock rapped on the door and woke Hermione up from being half asleep. She looked at the clock and saw it was 2 P.M. Excitedly, she jumped up and ran to the door and opened it with a huge smile on her face. Her expression changed when she saw it was just Professor McGonagall. She let her inside and shut the door, "Where's Bellatrix?"

"She is still at Azkaban," Professor McGonagall said, "I just came to tell you I am on my way to apparating there now, and once I sign her out, we will apparate back here into the room. I just didn't want to do it without you knowing it because it might have frightened or surprised you."

"Oh okay," Hermione said relieving her thoughts of Bellatrix having to stay longer there, "How long will it take you?"

"Five minutes I am guessing. She has been a lot better than when she was there before she came to us, Hermione, but she still might have some aftermath problems the first week back here. As you may have heard, they feed the prisoners horribly and they never bathe. Perhaps while you wait you could get her a warm meal ready and make sure the bathroom is set up for her."

"Will do, Professor."

Professor McGonagall immediately apparated onto the front grounds of Azkaban Prison. As it always was, the weather was dark, cold, windy, and storming. She walked inside and talked to an annoyed looking woman about releasing Bellatrix. A man with a strange looking key prompted Professor McGonagall to follow him down the dark, loud hallways full of moans and screaming. The dementors no longer guarded the prison, giving the prisoners _some_ peace. They walked down to hallway number 23 and down to cell number 6. The small 8 by 8 feet cell had nothing but a curled up Bellatrix in the corner sleeping on the floor. The key guard brushed away the massive amount of insects crawling around the gate handle.

"Alright, up you go," the key guard yelled in her direction.

When Bellatrix didn't move, Professor McGonagall walked towards her and bent down placing a hand on her trembling body, she could see her eyes wide open staring at the dank wall, "It's time to go, Ms. Black. It's time to go back now, back to Hogwarts. You remember who's waiting for you?"

Bellatrix didn't move or acknowledge Professor McGonagall. Professor McGonagall shook her and Bellatrix gasped grabbing her hand. Professor McGonagall helped her up off the ground, "Do you?"

"What?" Bellatrix asked her giving her an odd expression and holding herself.

"Do you remember who you're going back to?"

Bellatrix looked down and looked like she was thinking about the right answer to say. Professor McGonagall reached in her robes and pulled out a picture and showed it to Bellatrix. Bellatrix took it from her and scanned it. Her eyes lit up and she smiled, "H-Hermione. My Hermione." She hadn't forgotten about Hermione, she was just too focused on trying to survive the hell on earth.

"She's very excited and happy to have you back. Are you going to be able to contain yourself and act as mentally stable as you were before you left?"

"Y-yeah, I just…Can we go now?"

Professor McGonagall smiled and nodded and grabbed her arm leading her to the front to sign her out. They apparated back into Bellatrix's suite in Hogwarts and found Hermione patiently waiting at the kitchen table. They both turned to look at her.

"I'll leave you two," Professor McGonagall opened the door and left.

Hermione made the biggest smile she's ever made while getting up. She ran over to her and wrapped her arms around Bellatrix. Bellatrix stood stiff. Hermione stood back and looked at her, "What's wrong?"

"It's just that I haven't bathed in a while and I know I must smell awful, and my breath tastes horrid," she said.

Hermione squeezed her against her kissing her mouth without any hesitation, "I don't care if you smell and look like a garbage dump, I would love you and want you either way."

"You're insane."

Hermione giggled, "I'll let you go take a shower. I'm making you some food, and then if you want to, you can go sleep in a _real_ bed again!"

"Well," Bellatrix traced her long untrimmed nail along Hermione's cheek, "The first thing I plan on doing when I come out of that bathroom is devouring you! And now that I'm all Azkaban-ed up, I'm more in the mood to torture and kill Draco's friendsssss!"

Hermione put her hands on her hips and gave her a look.

"Oh don't worry," Bellatrix said walking to the bathroom and shutting the door, "I don't have my wand….but I do have my hands!"

Hermione laughed and texted Ginny: She's back.

Bellatrix came out of the bathroom 45 minutes later after checking herself. She hadn't gotten any nasty insect bites or bruises or anything like last time she was in Azkaban. She walked over to the kitchen table and sat down watching Hermione finishing cooking.

"Enjoy yourself," Hermione asked.

"Yeah, except something was missing," she sighed.

"What?"

"Come here and I'll tell you."

Hermione smirked and walked over to her having an idea what she was talking about. Bellatrix wrapped her arms around Hermione and rested her head on her chest breathing in her perfume.

"Are you okay, hun?"

"I am now that I'm here again with you."

"Aww, you're so charming. Did you learn charming classes over there?"

"No, I've always been this way with people I adore. It's just that it was the first time being away from you, and now I've realized that I really need to make it up to you, after everything."

Hermione sighed, "You don't have to make up anything for me. Just get better, that's all I ask. Do you want to talk about it now during our early dinner, or wait, or…?"

"But Azkaban isn't the next thing on the list, the Riddle man is."

Hermione pulled away from Bellatrix and started making up their plates, "Well then tell me about this Riddle man."

"Alright, I guess it's time to be serious and emotional now."

"Don't worry, I'll make it up for you later tonight."

Bellatrix raised an eyebrow at her as she set down their plates and sat across from her, "You're not saying goal number 2 is going to happen?"

"No, not all of it."

"But I thought you wanted it all at the same time."

"I did, well, I do, but, it's complicated… I don't know, just go on with your story."

"Well now you got me thinking about later."

"Focus!"

"Okay, okay," Bellatrix picked at her food, eating slowly to get her stomach used to real food again. "I didn't meet, or even hear of, him until I started dating Rodolphus. He was the one who introduced me to him. I didn't even care about what he was talking about when we first met because he was so handsome and mesmerizing."

Bellatrix looked up at Hermione and smiled, "You know, now that I think about it, it's funny really. I was only 16 when I met Tom, and he was 41. I was infatuated with a man more than twice my age, and now it's switched around. I'm Voldemort, and you're me."

"Am I? I don't feel crazy though, but it's the ones that don't know they're crazy that are really crazy." Hermione reached over to hold one of her hands, "You're not Voldemort. You're Bellatrix. You're your own person. You are capable of love, and he, sadly, had a hard time giving and receiving it."

"I never saw him smile or laugh, not unless he was torturing or killing someone, or talking about it, which was all he ever did talk about. You couldn't just ask him, "Hey, how about this weather?" or "How are things with the family?" But he at least cared, in his own way, about his followers, the Death Eaters. I believe he took pity in me because I was one of the only women Death Eaters, and he sort of took me under his wing. I became obsessed with him. I wanted to be him. If I could be like him, maybe he would want me more than just a follower… but he never did, especially in the end."

She looked over at Hermione who was staring at her with love and promise written all over her face as she let go of Bellatrix's hand and went back to eating, waiting patiently for her to continue.

"I remember when my rage was at its highest. Not my insanity, just my rage. I was spitting fire for a month at anyone and everyone after Tom was killed by your young baby friend, Harry Potter. His body died on Halloween, isn't that ironic, and funny? I tried searching for him, but I didn't know what to do, or where to look, or who to ask. Rodolphus and his brother, Rabastan, talked me into interrogating aurors, members of the order of the phoenix."

Bellatrix got up and started pacing, "I said, well we have to do SOMETHING! Because I don't have anyone else! I don't have anyone who cares and I DON'T HAVE ANYONE I CARE FOR!"

She slammed her fist on the table making Hermione jump. Her head was down and she was breathing heavily. She lifted her head after a few seconds and continued again, "I remember…. I remember it was near mid to late November when we went to the Longbottom's house. Those arrogant fools. HOW DARE THEY TALK TO ME, BELLATRIX LESTRANGE, THAT WAY?! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAID, GRANGER?! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAID TO ME?!"

Hermione was gripping the side of her chair tightly trying not to show Bellatrix that she was scaring her now. Hermione had realized that it wasn't her father, it wasn't Rodolphus…. It was Voldemort that brought out the worst in Bellatrix. He could probably bring out the worst in anyone, but Bellatrix was so lonely, depressed, and broken from her childhood, she was an easy target for his army. Hermione shook her head at Bellatrix.

"THAT FUCKING BLOOD TRAITING GIT HAD THE NERVE TO TELL ME THAT HE WAS DEAD!... He told me it was all over for me, and that soon I'll be locked up in Azkaban Prison for the rest of my life, with no one in the world to even care or love for me, not that they ever could or ever did…. That's what he said to me. And …. And he was the only person I've ever tortured… He was the only person I tortured … for myself."

Hermione had stopped eating completely, surprised that Bellatrix was actually talking about the Longbottoms. She wasn't prepared for that part, but was happy she was confiding in her about it anyways.

"I never touched the woman," Bellatrix said calming down, her hands on the table holding her up, "All my anger and hatred went into that man. And when they took me to Azkaban, I didn't even fucking care, not until a few weeks afterward when everything started to sink in and those damn dementors wouldn't leave me the fuck alone."

Bellatrix sat back down, and Hermione could tell she was done screaming, "You know, Hermione, I really don't understand how I even made it 14 years in there. It was cold, it was boring, it was lonely… depressing…. But Sirius and I were the strong ones, we didn't let the dementors get to us. We ate with them, and they would hover near our cells day and night, but I would ignore them. I started ignoring everything, even Sirius trying to talk me into renouncing Voldemort. I stared out the little window into the North Sea for days, weeks, months, years…"

Bellatrix got that far away look in her eyes, "I thought he would rejoice when I finally joined him again after breaking out of Azkaban. I thought it would be like old times and he would … well… I guess it's foolish to think he would come to me with open arms… He didn't care about his followers anymore, they were more like slaves. The man in this new body was not the same man I remember. Sure, he still wanted revenge, and the same thing he wanted before, a world without half-bloods and muggle-borns."

Hermione's heart soared when Bellatrix said muggle-borns instead of mudbloods.

"Which I still think is hilarious because he was a half-blood. God, what the fuck is wrong with the world? What the fuck is wrong? If I can sit here with you like a normal person, then _he_ certainly could've done the right thing. He could have loved if he wanted to, but he didn't, because no one loved him… except me…. But I wasn't good enough, I was never good enough for him or anyone else."

"You're good enough for me," Hermione said softly.

Bellatrix smiled at her, "I know, love. Frank Longbottom told me that there was once an evil, dark wizard, the worst dark wizard of all time, but one day he went away, and he was never coming back. As much as I miss him, Tom is never coming back. And I thought that I couldn't live without him, but now I know that I can. I know he wouldn't care, but it makes me proud. All I ever wanted was for someone to give me a chance and to love me for who I really am. I'm glad I have you, and now you know everything about me. And you're still here."

Hermione smiled at her with tears in her eyes.

Bellatrix broke the conversation and started talking in her present voice, "I don't know how you can just sit there like a giddy, innocent school girl."

"I can't help it. That goblin that was at the Malfoy Manor, Griphook, he escaped with us and he helped us get into your vault, and when I was you from Polyjuice Potion, he yelled at me because I was acting like a 'dewey-eyed school girl.'"

"What were you doing?"

"Someone said good morning to me, and I said good morning back. I guess apparently you wouldn't have said good morning back."

"No, I would've ignored them and been on my way."

"Well I tried to be assertive with the goblins in Gringotts."

"So you actually got into my vault, then?"

"Yes, everything we touched multiplied."

"Good, more for me whenever I get the hell out of here, if I ever do."

"You will. Are you tired?"

Bellatrix shook her head.

"Hmm."

"What?"

"Usually you're tired after one of these chats."

"No, you know what I was thinking? I've told you all the things on that list now."

Hermione smiled and put her chin in her hand, "Mmhmm."

Bellatrix snatched the Bellatrix Blog and turned to that page and scribbled out all the things she wrote down. She turned back a few pages and looked up at Hermione with wide eyes.

"What is it now?" Hermione asked her.

"I failed at my last goal."

"I told you, it wasn't your fault. The last week doesn't count."

Bellatrix looked back at it, "You said the second goal was going to be after I talked to you about all this stuff."

"Oh, is that why you rushed through it all?"

Bellatrix laughed, "No, it just sort of all flowed together."

"Well," Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's dish and glass and put it in the sink along with hers, "Whenever you're ready, there's no rush."

"Whenever _I'm_ ready? Why do you say that? Because of what I told you about my father and Rod? I know you're nothing like them. Then again, maybe you are, maybe you're a freak."

"Maybe _you're_ a freak. _Maybe_."

"Well, just so you know, although I've read things and such, I've never actually been with a girl."

"I've never been with a guy or a girl, so I beat you."

Bellatrix put her head on the table in her arms. Hermione sighed and got up walking over to her. She sat down next to her and shook her to put her head up, "I don't know why I'm doing this. I honestly don't understand why guys like other guys and girls like other girls, I mean, I know why, it's just they have the same parts, so why is it so fascinating?"

Bellatrix smirked and put her hands on Hermione's legs rubbing them.

"Anyways," Hermione continued blushing, "I've never let anyone do this, not even Ron or Harry. And I'm just warning you, it's not going to be that big of a deal because I've groped myself before and it gets boring after a second."

Bellatrix gasped and put a hand on Hermione's arm, "Oh you're so cute! Why are you blushing again? Are you nervous?"

"W-well yeah, I've never done anything like this with anyone, and I just feel like it's going to be awkward, and you're going to think I'm weird because of the way I react or something."

Bellatrix got up and pulled her with her kissing her cheek. She whispered in her ear, "Don't think too much, just let it all flow…like an Azkaban and Voldemort conversation."

Hermione laughed putting her arms around Bellatrix. Bellatrix held one of Hermione's hands and spun them around slowly, dancing to nothing but their giggles.

"Or we can wait for it all until I finally do get out of this bloody room and am able to chain you in my underground dungeon at Black Manor, your choice."

"As long as I'm with you," Hermione said.

"I think you have Stockholm Syndrome."

"Good," Hermione guided Bellatrix's hand to one of her breasts and squeezed her hand against it. She smiled and laughed while Bellatrix stopped spinning them.

"What is so funny," Bellatrix asked laughing a little herself.

"You," Hermione replied.

"See, this is why girls like girls; because your breasts are different than mine."

"I know… Mine are super small, and yours are super big."

"No, yours are perfect. Mine are constantly in the way of everything."

"I like yours."

"Do you," Bellatrix quickly put one of Hermione's hand on her own breast, "We can just have a boob squeezing contest. And later you can go and tell Ginny all about it so she can make fun of us."

"She would enjoy the story, but… not as much as I would creating it."

Bellatrix pulled her close and kissed her passionately. Hermione held on as long as she could hold her breath, remembering her vows to spoil Bellatrix with affection. They both continued feeling each other and exploring, even though their clothes were still on. Bellatrix snuck a hand underneath Hermione's shirt and remembered when she healed her back, "You're so warm."

Hermione led her to the living room. Bellatrix sat down pulling Hermione down to sit on top of her. Hermione held her face in her hands, "You're a great person."

"No," Bellatrix said desperately, "I'm not. I wish I was, but I'm not. I'm… I'm…" Bellatrix put a hand on her chest and hissed, "What the hell is going on?"

"You're showing remorse, Bellatrix! That's how your soul heals! See, you have the potential."

"You're a soul healer now?"

"No, I didn't force you to feel remorse."

Bellatrix sighed when she felt her chest un-tighten. She kissed Hermione's chin and neck working her way down to her chest. She pulled Hermione's shirt up revealing her black bra, "Have I brought you to the dark side?" Bellatrix smirked feeling Hermione's smooth skin.

"I'm so in love, I think if you asked me in this moment to join you and the Death Eaters, I would say yes."

"That's not going to happen. I'd rather just spend all day with you than go around needlessly killing."

"I'm glad."

"I just want you to know, Hermione, that everything I do to you now is for love. I know you're really into that true love stuff. And I love you, my true love, you hath my heart."

Hermione had her hands in Bellatrix's dark and wavy hair feeling how smooth it was even after rotting in Azkaban all those years. Bellatrix pulled up Hermione's bra to reveal her small, but perfect breasts. Hermione, at this point, was no longer nervous at all. She rested her chin on Bellatrix's head allowing Bellatrix to take as much time as she wanted paying attention to each breast with her plump lips and warm tongue. Hermione completely took her shirt and bra off and rested her head on Bellatrix's shoulder after a few minutes. Bellatrix stood up carrying Hermione to the bedroom and fell on the bed with Hermione still on top of her. Hermione sat up and smiled lifting Bellatrix's shirt up, "What about you?"

"I don't deserve any of this fine time."

"You do. Who would I be if I didn't return the favor? I love you…my Bella."

Hermione pulled Bellatrix's bra up as she did with hers earlier to reveal her own breasts, which were probably two times the size of Hermione's.

"Yeah well whatever," Bellatrix replied, "I love you more."

Hermione rubbed her hand across Bellatrix's stomach and chest, feeling a few faint scars left from the years in Azkaban.

Hermione did the same that Bellatrix had done to her breasts, and tore and ripped her shirt and bra off.

"My, you are a freak," Bellatrix said.

"I try," Hermione replied, "Now you can cross off second and third; you're making so much progress! Should we tell Professor McGonagall?"

"I can imagine the sternness now."

"Are you tired?"

"No, but I am comfy here. You should bring the T.V. in here."

Hermione got off Bellatrix and took out her wand and went into the living room. A second later, a T.V. that looked like the one in the living room rested on the wall in front of the bed.

"Is that the T.V. from out there?" Bellatrix asked when Hermione returned.

"No, I just copied it. I think I'm going to take a nap. You can stay up and watch your serial killing shows if you'd like."

Bellatrix and Hermione both got under the covers and cuddled with each other.

"It's so weird to think that just a few hours ago I was in my least favorite place, and now I'm in my most favorite place."

"Hogwarts?"

"In your arms."

"You know where my favorite place is?"

"Where?"

"Honey Dukes."

"Stupid selfish bitch," Bellatrix smirked while Hermione laughed and closed her eyes.

Bellatrix fell asleep an hour later but was awoken by an owl tapping at the window. She shook Hermione awake to open the window and receive the letter.

"It's for you," Hermione said still sleepy.

"Read it, what's it say?"

Hermione opened the letter and read it silently to herself:

_I'm coming for the mudblood girl._

_-Rod _


	20. Chapter 20

**I had a really hard time finishing this, which is why I'm so late. I've been trying to think of things to give Hermione and Bellatrix to do while they wait until the end of August when Hermione finally graduates from Hogwarts.**

**Cha1890: Killing Hermione or Bella would mean the story would end :( and I don't want that, but who knows…maybe that's how I'll have to end it. All stories have to come to an end some day, right?...**

**LoveSKINS94: Yeah, I'm taking my time with their relationship, even though they started it kind of early in the story. Hermione has to feel like she fully trusts Bellatrix.**

"Well?" Bellatrix asked impatiently turning over so her back was towards Hermione.

"It's…," Hermione hesitated, but thought before she said anything. "Okay, just promise me you won't get upset, and that we'll talk through this before doing anything."

"No," Bellatrix put her hand out still lying in bed with her back towards her. "Give it to me."

Hermione hesitated still, but walked over to Bellatrix's side of the bed when Bellatrix started snapping her fingers at her. She sat down and Bellatrix scooted over a little for her. Bellatrix snatched the paper out of Hermione's hands immediately and read it out loud:

_I'm coming for the mudblood girl._

_-Rod_

Bellatrix immediately started boiling inside and Hermione could tell, "Now wait, just wait, maybe he's just sending this to rile you up. Why would he come for me? It's not like he knows about our relationship."

"No, but he knows how easily attached I am," Bellatrix said angrily, but then softened her voice, "But that doesn't mean you're not special to me, just saying."

"I know," Hermione snatched the letter back, "I'm taking this to Professor McGonagall."

"What? No!"

"Why not?"

"Because you… you can't! You'll just make things worse. You should probably just stop with school and stay here with me where you're safe…. My wand would be useful to have back, too."

"No, you're not the one who has to protect me, it's not your job."

"But it'll be my fault if something happens!"

"No it won't, he can make his own choices! And I'm not scared of him. Fuck, Bellatrix, I fucking had to deal with your crazy ass at Malfoy Manor, give me some credit."

Bellatrix gave her pouted look.

"Stop it, it's not working."

Bellatrix switched to her angry face again, "I'll kill him, and there's nothing you or anyone else can do about it."

"Oh really? I'd like to see you try to escape from this room."

Bellatrix turned her head, "I already did, when my sister left, and you were sleeping. I tried to follow her."

"Oh…," Hermione laid down on top of her feeling her warm trembling and naked chest rising, "So you think killing him is our only option, then?"

"Well what do you propose we do otherwise?"

"I don't know."

"It's not like we can put him back in Azkaban, he already escaped once."

"So did you, and they put you back in Azkaban."

Bellatrix sighed, "Do you always have to have the last word?"

"Yeah, I heard I'm a bit stubborn sometimes."

"Sometimes? I bet if it were up to you, you would make him come here with us so we could all be a happy and healthy family."

"No way! I like being alone with you. Besides, I'm not a therapist, or a doctor, as we keep saying. I'm just here for you, and only you."

"I still don't trust him. There's something he knows that we don't know he knows, but he knows it, and I want to know how he knows it."

"I want to know how you can keep up with all of that."

"You're not safe, Hermione, I know this man. He may not be as crazy as I am, but he can still do a lot of damage."

"I know, I believe you. But I still want to talk to Professor McGonagall about this. And I want you to come with me."

Bellatrix sighed loudly, "Fine, we'll do it your way, since I don't even have my wand. Where are you hiding it, by the way?"

"Not telling," Hermione said grabbing her bra.

Bellatrix quickly sat and snatched the bra from her hand throwing it across the room. She pulled Hermione down on the bed and sat on top of her holding her wrists down, "If you don't tell me where it is, you're going to die…from a laughing fit!"

Bellatrix started tickling her sides and arm pits, making Hermione laugh so loud she could probably be heard outside the room, "Stop it!"

She kicked her and tried shoving her off, but Bellatrix stayed on the bed with her. Hermione grabbed a pillow and started smacking her with it, "I'm going to fucking kill you!"

"Hey, be careful with that pillow, it's already had to endure my night terrors and scratching at it."

Hermione sat cross-legged on the bed holding the pillow against her chest. Bellatrix crawled towards her pushing her back down on the bed and on top of her again. She nuzzled her face into Hermione's neck, "I just want you to be safe, and happy, and not worried or depressed, or scared, or angry, or anything bad. I don't even care about myself, you're number one to me now. And I never even thought like that when it was just my sister I cared about. I was always first before her. But now, it's just about you."

"You need to care about yourself, too, Bella," Hermione rubbed her hands against Bellatrix's smooth back and wrapped her arms around her holding her tightly.

"Why does remorse have to hurt so much," Bellatrix winced feeling her chest tighten for a few seconds.

"What are you sorry for?"

"I'm sorry for hurting you, like really sorry. Not just saying it because it'll make you feel better, like I did last week or whatever…. You were just a girl. You still are. Why did a young girl like you end up having to go through so much shit?"

"It made me who I am. I don't regret it. I don't regret anything, because even though it might sound vain, I like who I am."

"No, it doesn't sound vain. It sounds like the sanest statement I've ever heard."

"I'm going to talk to Professor McGonagall about that letter tomorrow after class."

"No. You should not, for me, for my birthday. Remember, I never had many birthday presents.."

"Nice try. This is the best thing. What if Rodolphus harms someone and I could've stopped it by saying something?"

"Aren't you the one that said he makes his own choices?"

Hermione squinted her eyes, "Using my words against me now, are you?"

Bellatrix smirked her evil smirk and leaned forward so their lips were touching, "What're you going to do?" She parted Hermione's lips with her own, kissing and sucking. Hermione shot out her tongue into Bellatrix, but stopped when she heard her phone ringing from the living room. She turned her head and pushed a groaning Bellatrix off of her.

"No! Nooooo!" Bellatrix put her hands out as Hermione picked up her bra and shirt and went out into the living room.

"You're so dramatic," Hermione said, "I almost think your time with Voldemort was an act."

Bellatrix followed her out, still topless and sat on the couch with her trying to grab the shirt and bra from Hermione.

"Look, it's Ginny," Hermione smiled showing the phone before answering it. Bellatrix didn't care, but was getting the shirt out of Hermione's hands and smelling it.

Hermione: Helloooo?

Ginny: Hey! How is everything? She's not going Azkaban crazy, is she?

Hermione: No, she's totally back to her old self, well, the self she was in here, not her old self with Voldemort.

"I miss Tom," Bellatrix crooned lying on the couch with her head in Hermione's lap.

Ginny: Good. I almost thought I might have to take care of that one for you.

Hermione: I wouldn't be surprised if you did, actually, especially since she's taken a liking to you.

"Stop talking about me!"

"Shut up, Bella, no one asked your opinion, your filthy little pure-blood."

Ginny: You did not just say that to her.

Hermione: She's not going to do anything; I have her melting in my hands."

Bellatrix turned on her back looking up at Hermione. Hermione rubbed her chest and stomach making her make some sound of pleasure.

"You're like a cat."

"I hate cats."

"Too bad, I have one."

Hermione: Crookshanks is still at your mum and dad's, right?"

Ginny: Yup, from what I've heard, he's been keeping out all the other animals in the garden. He's crazy. But anyways, I just called to make sure you weren't killed or anything.

Hermione: No, I'm perfectly alive and well right now.

"Does she seriously think I would've killed you? Give me the fucking phone." Bellatrix grabbed the phone and started her own conversation with Ginny.

Bellatrix: Who are you to check up on us?

Ginny: Um, I'm Ginny fucking Weasley, bitch.

Bellatrix: Just so you know, I would never hurt our little Hermione, not unless she wanted it for sexual pleasure.

Ginny: You better not.

Hermione grabbed the phone back while Bellatrix got up and walked into the bedroom.

Hermione: Anyways, thanks for calling, we appreciate it. Maybe we'll come by later in an hour or so if you're not doing anything. I was going to wait until tomorrow after class, but I think I'm going to do it today. I need to talk to McGonagall about another letter Bella got from her ex-husband.

Ginny: Oh geeze, what is he threatening to blow up the school?

Hermione: No, just said he's coming for me. Or, he said he's coming for the 'mudblood girl,' and I assume that's me.

Ginny: Err, yeah, go take that to her. I don't want anything happening to you. You've already been through so much.

Hermione: Okay, I'm going to go. I'll text you after we're done talking to her.

Hermione hung up with Ginny and put her bra and shirt back on. She went into the bedroom to see what Bellatrix was doing to find her standing on the bed levitating the pillows around the room with Hermione's wand.

"Give me that," Hermione took the wand from a disappointed Bellatrix as the pillows fell to the floor. "Put your clothes back on; we're going to McGonagall now."

"Now?" Bellatrix whined.

"Yes, now. Is there an echo in this room?" Bellatrix gave her a pouty look as she got dressed. Hermione grabbed the letter putting it in her pocket and grabbed Bellatrix's hand as they walked out of the room. Hermione led them quickly down the staircase to Professor McGonagall's office. Once they were inside and done showing and telling her about the letter, Professor McGonagall began again about how Hogwarts is safe and they have no need to worry.

"You people are ridiculous," Bellatrix yelled at her, "You say Gringotts is the safest place, and then Hogwarts. Well Gringotts has gotten broken into a few times, once, may I remind you, by this girl!"

Hermione looked the other way when Professor McGonagall gave her a stern look.

"And don't even get me started on Hogwarts, not after the war."

"Ms. Black, you and Ms. Granger have no responsibility in the safety of our school!"

"But what about the safety of ourselves?! He said he's coming for her! Shouldn't we do something, take some extra precaution?"

"No. We will go about as if he never sent the letter. Who knows if he's really coming here, or if he's just doing this get you upset."

Hermione looked over at Bellatrix; Bellatrix glared at her.

"Ms. Black, it's nice that you feel so protective over Hermione, but leave that to the professionals."

"Oh, the professionals, okay. Fine, guess I'll have to protect her in my own way."

"Inside your suite, and that is all."

"Thanks Professor," Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's hand again and led her out the door. "I'm 17, of age, an adult now, I should be able to take care of myself."

Bellatrix didn't say anything, but held onto her hand tightly.

"Let's go see Ginny," Hermione said squeezing back, "She'll lighten the mood up for us."

Hermione led the way into the Gryffindor common room with an apathetic Bellatrix following her. Hermione saw Neville sitting by the fire place. He looked over and he and Bellatrix stared directly at each other for a few seconds, Neville with a saddened, confused look; Bellatrix with a careless one, but Hermione saw the very small hint of anger. Neville got up and went to the boys' dorm without saying anything to either of them. Bellatrix and Hermione were the only ones in the common room now.

Hermione sighed and led Bellatrix to one of the sofas. She texted Ginny where they were and waited. Hermione caught Bellatrix in her own world staring at nothing.

"Hey," Hermione rubbed her cheek with the back of her hand and she turned to face her. Bellatrix squeezed the ends of the sofa and got up breathing heavily. She started pacing and circling around with clenched fists.

"Hey, hey," Hermione got up to go over to her, "What's wrong?"

"That _boy_ has no right to judge me for what I did to his father! He has no idea! I'm not sorry, I'm glad he's where he is. I'm glad he's suffering and not dead."

"He doesn't know that, Bellatrix," Hermione whispered to her putting her hands on her cheeks and trying to calm her, "He only knows what you did, he doesn't know why. Put yourself in his shoes. Wouldn't you be upset if someone did that to your father?"

"No."

Hermione sighed, "Wouldn't you .. be upset if someone did that to Narcissa, or to me?"

"No one would have any reason to do that to you or Narcissa."

"Well, then you just did it to me at Malfoy Manor for no reason?"

Bellatrix looked at her with anger, and suddenly got tears in her eyes, "Why do you always have to go and throw that in my face?" She started to walk out of the common room, but Hermione grabbed her. She snatched her arm from Hermione's grip, but stopped walking.

"I don't mean to throw it in your face; I'm just trying to get you to see it from his point of view."

"What about my point of view?"

"He can do that, too. I think you should both talk, when you are ready. He doesn't hate you, Bellatrix. He told me he doesn't hate you. It's just weird for him, you have to understand. He'll come around, I know he will, I know Neville. He's very sensitive. Just give him some time."

"How can he not hate me?"

"Now you're questioning again, right after you questioned why he was angry in the first place. Why do you do that? Why do you always go back and forth?"

"Because I want him to not hate me, but I know that he should. I know I have no excuse, no real excuse."

"It's almost like you want people to hate you. Is it because you're afraid of being let down? Because you know I won't let you down."

Hermione pulled her to her and hugged her. Bellatrix fell into her arms gasping, "I want to cry so bad. I'm tired of screaming."

"Do you want to go back to the room?"

"What about Ginny?"

"She'll understand, I'll text her again right now."

"You shouldn't have to give up your friends for me."

"I'm not, I promise. I can see them anytime. This is a very important moment when you need me, and I'm not leaving you alone. Come on."

When they got back to the room, Bellatrix immediately went into the bedroom and hid herself under the covers and cried for twenty minutes with Hermione holding her the whole time. "No wonder people hate me," Bellatrix cried.

"Not everyone hates you," Hermione said rubbing her back and kissing her cheek and lips.

"A lot of people hate me."

"A lot of people hate me, too."

"Why would they hate you? You're so kind, and patient….understanding…..and cuddly."

Hermione let go of Bellatrix and sat up.

"No, where are you going?!"

Hermione bent back down and kissed her, "I'm just going to get some water, I'll be right back, my sweet, sweet love."

Inside the bedroom, Hermione's phone went off and Bellatrix looked over at it. She saw that it was Neville calling, and was very tempted to answer it. She picked it up and called for Hermione to hurry up. Hermione ran in giving Bellatrix a glass of water and answered her phone.

Hermione: Hello?

Neville: Hey…Hermione, is everything alright?

Hermione: Yeah, things are okay, why?

Neville: Ginny just said you were having Bellatrix problems, and I thought maybe it was my fault. I didn't mean to just walk out on you two, I just didn't know what to say, especially when she just carelessly stared at me like she had nothing to do with the way my parents are.

Hermione: Well, I talked to her about that, and she's talked to me about things, too. I just told her that you two really need to talk, have a heart to heart, but only when you're ready. I'm trying to get her to see things from your point of view, and maybe soon, you'll be able to see things from her point of view.

Neville: Her point of view? What else do I need to know, Hermione?

Hermione: I know you're upset, I understand. I promised her I wouldn't tell you. You'll just have to hear it from her yourself when you are ready, and when she is ready.

Neville: Well now I'm curious. These are my parents. I'm ready whenever she's ready.

Hermione: Well, I know she's not ready now. I, honestly, think she's more scared of you than you are of her.

Neville: Wow, I feel a strong sense of power now! Well…. I know you're working with her, and I have heard she's been improving, so… tell her … tell her I said I'm sorry…for being a jerk earlier.

Hermione: That will make her feel better. Thanks for calling, Neville.

"Are you sucking your thumb," Hermione looked over at Bellatrix lying on the bed after hanging up with Neville.

"Got anything else for me to suck?"

Hermione laughed and lied down facing her, "Not one thing."

"You're no help."

"Is it a nervous habit?"

"I guess."

"Neville said he's sorry for being a jerk and walking out on us earlier."

Bellatrix didn't say anything. Hermione rolled onto her back and texted Ginny again.

Hermione: I'm really sorry, I feel like a bad friend for ditching you. I really feel bad.

Ginny: I love you! Don't feel bad! I understand, I promise. Text me if you need anything.

"Ginny is such an amazing friend," Hermione said putting her phone on the bedside table.

"Yeah, I like her. I'm glad she accepts me. It really means a lot, and I don't think she knows it."

"She knows. She knows it means a lot to me."

"Hey, Bella?"

"What?"

"Did you see Sirius a lot while growing up?"

"Not really. I was 8 years old when he was born. He was an annoying little puke nonetheless. He followed me around a lot and bothered me."

"Do you miss him?"

Bellatrix sighed, "Do you want me to tell an emotional story about Sirius now?"

"Sure, we have nothing else to do."

"Don't you have homework to do or something?"

"Why do you care?"

"I don't."

"Then why did you ask?"

"None of your damn business."

Hermione sat up and leaned over so she was hovering above Bellatrix, "If you don't want to talk about it, all you have to say is 'Hermione, I'm glad you're trying to help me, but I don't want to talk about that right now.'"

"Granger, I'm glad you're leaning over me like the feisty Gryffindor cat you are, but I'd rather you be topless."

Hermione smirked and leaned back. Bellatrix grabbed her arm to pull her forward again.

"Why don't we go to the library? I miss it, and I can do that homework you asked about and maybe you can find some interesting books you like. Hey, maybe I can even get you into the restricted section!"

"What makes you think they're going to allow that?"

"Well they allowed you into the castle, didn't they?"

"This is a very good point. Okay, we can go, but if anyone gives me trouble…"

"They won't. Just ignore them if they stare at you or say anything negative, as I've told you many times before."

"I can't always contain myself."

"Well you're going to have to, or I'll have to leave you here alone. Would you rather be here alone?"

"No, I'll go with you. You know, ever since I came back here, you and Ginny have really made me feel like a student again, except it's a lot more fun….Well, it would be if I wasn't confined to this room. At least I have you."

"Yeah, you seem to fit in with us pretty well," Hermione got up and put out her hand to Bellatrix to help her off the bed.

The library was full of students. To Bellatrix's surprise, not a lot of them paid any attention to her; they were more interested in whatever book they were reading or paper they were writing. It was loud, full of laughter and excitement.

"This place is hopping today," Hermione said as they walked in, "Do you want to go to the quiet room or is this okay?"

"Whatever," Bellatrix said carelessly.

"Alright, is there anything in particular that you want to look at?"

"Not really, I'll just mosey around."

"Well…I was hoping you would pick a few books out so you could bring them back to our table, then I could do my homework."

"Why, I can't look around without you one step behind me?"

"No," Hermione laughed, "Put yourself in my shoes. Wouldn't you be concerned about letting Bellatrix Black wandering the library full of students by herself?"

"What's the problem? It's not like I've got my wand."

"No, but like you said before, you have your hands, and I wouldn't put anything past you, my lady. Now let's go find you some books."

Hermione put her arm around Bellatrix's, "Now I feel pressured and rushed."

"Do you want to see if we can go into the restricted section? They might have crazy stuff in there!..."

"If you think we can, go for it."

They walked to the back of the library where a librarian sat at a desk in front of the restricted section. Hermione started talking to the librarian while Bellatrix walked away into an aisle of books only a few feet from Hermione, but out of sight. The librarian got up to leave for a moment and asked Hermione to wait. Hermione looked around and got wide-eyed when she didn't see Bellatrix near her. She walked over to the aisle of books and found Bellatrix hiding around the corner, not looking at any books, but looking as if she was waiting for Hermione to find her.

"Bellatrix!" Hermione grabbed her arm and ushered her back to the librarian's desk near the restricted section, "This isn't a game, you need to stay by me."

"God, you treat me like I'm your little child."

"Because I know you have child-like tendencies that can also harm people."

"I haven't harmed anyone since I've been here!"

"Draco's friend!"

"He doesn't count. Besides, that was before I went back to Azkaban. The slate's clean now."

"You're still a potential threat, with or without your wand, and you know it."

"Well what am I going to have to do to not be a potential threat? Not harm another person for a year?"

"No, I don't know, I'll talk to Professor McGonagall about it."

"Always McGonagall. The new Dumbledore. You know, you remind me Dumbledore sometimes."

"Really? How?"

"Because you always find some smooth way to keep me out of trouble."

"I find it hard to believe you were kept out of trouble when you were a student here."

"Well he sometimes got me out of it, but yeah, I was mostly a bad student."

"Bad as in behavior wise? Weren't you highly academic?"

"Yes, I suppose that's how we get along."

"Oh, I think there's more than that to it. I'm sure we have a lot in common we don't know about yet."

Bellatrix rubbed Hermione's arm while the librarian came back. Hermione put her arm around Bellatrix's when the librarian started to talk, "I talked to Professor McGonagall and she said it's alright to allow Ms. Black one book from the restricted section, but it cannot leave the library."

The librarian unlocked the door to the restricted section and allowed them inside.

"That's stupid, why can't I take it back to the room," Bellatrix whispered to Hermione as the librarian shut the door. "She shut the door! What a stupid old hag!"

"Bellatrix! You're very rude!"

"Oh come on, I'm just having fun. Look, we're all alone now."

"Whatever you have on your mind is not what we're actually here for."

Bellatrix put out her lower lip in a saddened motion and pulled Hermione towards her by her waist. She put her head on her shoulder.

Hermione sighed.

"Is that a sigh of pleasure," Bellatrix asked.

"No, it's a sigh of impatience. Now do you have any idea what book you would like to get?"

"Yes. Secrets of the Darkest Art by Owle Bullock. Tom read part of it to me once," Bellatrix looked off into the distance as if she was remembering a memory of Voldemort reading her a bedtime story.

"Yeah….Well, then let's see if we can find it," Hermione started walking towards the authors with the last names that started with 'B.'

She put her finger on the books looking at each name. Bellatrix followed her closely behind watching her. Hermione was bent over a little giving Bellatrix a view of her behind; she was solely focused on finding the book and jumped when Bellatrix grabbed from behind by her waists.

"You look so delicious when you're bent over like that, love," Bellatrix whispered in Hermione's ear when she stood up with her back against Bellatrix's chest.

"Oh, I don't look delicious when standing up straight," Hermione said casually, glad that Bellatrix couldn't see her blushing face.

Bellatrix snaked her arms around Hermione's stomach, "Oh, you do, _trust me_."

Hermione giggled and turned around wrapping her arms around Bellatrix's neck. Hermione kissed her lips. Bellatrix kissed her cheek and started sucking on her neck while feeling up her sides. She almost got a hand underneath her shirt when they heard the door knob move. Hermione immediately stepped away and went back to looking for the book when the librarian stepped in, "I'm sorry, I didn't ask if you needed any help finding anything."

"Oh, we're fine," Hermione said flushed. Bellatrix had a glare on her face. "Actually, here's the book right here."

Hermione grabbed Bellatrix as they walked out past the librarian with the book, "Thank you!"

"It's funny you pick this book out," Hermione said as they sat down, "Well, not really, knowing you and who you used to be affiliated with. But Ron, Harry, and I had a copy of this book while hunting Voldemort's horcruxes."

"Horcruxes," Bellatrix asked a little interested.

"Did you not know about his horcruxes?"

Bellatrix nodded with an interested look wanting Hermione to tell her more.

"Well, I'll let you read about them," Hermione said, "I don't think it'll do any harm since Professor McGonagall allowed us in there. I trust you. You can read about them while I do my homework and later I'll tell you about Voldemort's horcruxes."

Bellatrix opened the book and searched in the index for the pages about the horcruxes. She thought to herself, _How could he keep this from me? It seems like it's very important? I never kept anything from him._

Bellatrix looked up at Hermione. Hermione looked up at her and smiled. _Hermione hasn't kept anything from me. She's even letting me read this bloody book full of dark secrets! They're starting to trust me. _She's_ starting to trust me. I love her._

Bellatrix and Hermione stayed in the library for the rest of the evening. Many of the students left after 5 P.M. Some Slytherin students came up and asked for Bellatrix's autograph which she refused because she thought it was ridiculous. When they turned in the book and went back to the room, Bellatrix laid in bed thinking about how fake her relationship, her friendship, everything to do with Voldemort was a fake. He only did things for his own gain.

She looked over at Hermione who was sat up beside her reading some other book. For the first time, she questioned how she felt about her beloved past dark lord.


	21. Chapter 21

**Thanks again, as always, for all your review, favorites, and follows. They are awesome and make me smile every time I get an email notification about it.**

**Alexa: You're totally fine! I totally understand about exams and that, trust me. I hope they go okay (or did)!**

**Delilah Moon: I really appreciate your review! I always love hearing from new readers, and it makes me happy you're all enjoying it!**

**Also, I don't remember if I said Hermione was 17 in other chapters, but apparently she's 18 turning 19 in September. She's old! So anyways, sorry for that mistake if I made it anywhere.**

**Also, also, this isn't that important, but if you want to know what my Bellatrix's hair looks like, you can go to google and type in 'Helena Bonham Carter Live From Baghdad.' So my Bellatrix doesn't have huge crazy Bellatrix hair, since she fixed it after fixing her teeth. Just incase you wanted a more visual of her while reading. And I just picture Hermione as Emma Watson as she is now, Emma Watson-ish. Because no one else can be Hermione, except Helena Bonham Carter. I still think the scene at Gringotts was amazing, I actually thought it really was Emma Watson (not really, but you know).**

It was 6:30 in the morning on Tuesday, May 26. Bellatrix lied awake in bed staring at the ceiling. She had only slept for a few hours, but woke up to find herself, yet again, wondering about those horcruxes. She had heard the word thrown around a few times before, but never cared about it until now. She leaned up with her elbows on the bed and looked over at Hermione still sleeping. She looked over at the massive amount of books Hermione had brought over from the library.

_Hermione said she had a copy of that book, Secrets of the Darkest Art,_ Bellatrix thought. _ I wonder if Hermione still had it. She probably wouldn't let me look at it…would she? Even if she did still have the book, it was probably tucked away in her dorm somewhere. Does Ginny know about it?_

Bellatrix grunted and slammed her body back down on the bed, hoping she would wake Hermione, but Hermione didn't move at all. She sighed loudly; still no sign of a stirring Hermione. Finally, she got out of bed and walked out of the room. She walked into the kitchen and saw Hermione's school papers neatly stacked in a pile on the table. Bellatrix saw a small piece of paper that said something about Hogsmeade trips every Friday starting May 29. She looked at the papers underneath and found nothing but boring essays for her classes. She looked to the left and saw the Bellatrix Blog still lying where it always had been before she went to Azkaban. She scrunched her eyebrows and grabbed it to see if Hermione had written anything while she was gone.

_Yessssss_, _something to read_!

Hermione had written a few sentences each day Bellatrix was gone.

_Tuesday May 19, 1998_

_It's been almost a day since Bellatrix's been gone, and it just feels so weird, and I hate it. I'm spending more time with Harry and Ron, but it just doesn't feel right. I love them, but they don't need me as much as Bellatrix does…..And, like I said, I do love them, but I don't need them as much as I need Bella._

_Wednesday May 20, 1998_

_I went to quidditch practice today. Ginny, Harry, and Ron are getting the sport back together. They are going to play against Slytherin next Tuesday. Maybe I can take Bella…if she comes back, and she doesn't hate me again._

_Thursday May 21, 1998_

_Sigh. Just sigh. But…I can't imagine what Bella is doing, or going through. I guess my boredom is luck._

_Friday May 22, 1998_

_I visited Hagrid with Ron and Harry today. It was like old times. We also visited Grawp. He still likes me. Then I went and talked to Luna about things…She's a good listener._

_Saturday May 23, 1998_

_So we might be able to go to Hogsmeade again starting next Friday! That will be fun. It's nice to be at Hogwarts without some sort of chaos going around. _

_Sunday May 24, 1998_

_Two guys in one day. I got a letter from Viktor and Cormac kept bothering me when I went to the owlery to send back my reply._

_Monday May 25, 1998_

_Bella is coming back today (supposedly)! I'm kind of nervous, I hope she's okay…. Tomorrow is her birthday, and I want to do something for her, but I don't know what. I'm tired from all this excitement. I think I'll take a power nap before she gets here, that way I can be awake and she can have my full attention. :) _

_Oh yeah_, Bellatrix thought, _It is my birthday, isn't it? I'm 47…and I'm in love with an 18 year old. Is that wrong?_

Bellatrix shook those thoughts from her head and immediately started replying furiously remembering the day Hermione had talked about those _boys_ bothering her.

_Tuesday May 26, 1998_

_It's my birthday, but it's not important. Me being old isn't important. I don't understand how you can stand me, physically or emotionally. _

_I'm sorry you were sad whilst I was away. If I could have escaped, I would have. The only reason I escaped last time was because I had outside help._

_I'm glad you got to spend time with your friends and be normal without me there bothering you._

_Quidditch is okay, I guess. I don't mind going to the games. And I knew you were afraid I would come back and hate you. You all were. You don't trust me. Well, you do, but nothing, not even Azkaban could erase my memories and love for you._

_We were both bored. I did nothing all week except sleep._

_Who's Grawp? Isn't Hagrid the groundskeeper? I burned his house down, too, along with Ginny's. I enjoy fire._

_I want to go to Hogsmeade!_

_Who the hell are Viktor and Cormac?! They better not lay a finger on you. They better not even think about it. They better not even think about you at all, or even think about thinking about you. _

_You don't have to do anything for me for my birthday, although you probably won't read this until tomorrow when it's over with anyways. So hopefully it's just a normal day and you'll forget._

It was a little past 7 and Hermione was still sleeping. Bellatrix knew Hermione's alarm was set for 8, but she didn't feel like waiting that long for her to wake up. It was already light outside as the sun came through one of the windows shining on Hermione's face. She was sleeping perfectly on her back. Bellatrix casually pulled the sheets off of her; still no stirring. She climbed on top of her, allowing the bed to move a little. Finally, Hermione inhaled deeply, eyes still closed. She kept them closed and moved her head to the side, starting to irritate Bellatrix. Usually, when Bellatrix wanted someone awake, she would just scream at them and throw them out of bed, but Hermione was fragile to her and wasn't deserving of that kind of treatment she would have happily given to others such as Rodolphus and Rabastan.

Bellatrix leaned down placing her forearms on each side of Hermione's head to hold herself up. She used a hand to grab Hermione's face and pull it towards her. Hermione still didn't, even in the slightest, acknowledge Bellatrix's presence. Either she was a deep sleeper or she was just very good at ignoring her. Bellatrix caressed Hermione's cheek for a minute not knowing what else to do without yelling.

Hermione slowly opened her eyes to find Bellatrix's face an inch away from hers, "You're just like my cat," she mumbled sleepily rubbing Bellatrix's head, "Are you hungry?"

"Only for you," Bellatrix kissed her tenderly and then again passionately tasting the sweetness of her soft lips and tongue. Hermione groaned like she was trying to say something. She turned her head sideways making Bellatrix kiss her cheeks and her neck.

"It's your birthday today!" Hermione said fully awake now.

"Mhmm," Bellatrix continued kissing her.

"I know you said you don't care about those things, but I do. I'm taking you to a quidditch game today; Gryffindor versus Slytherin. Ginny even got you Slytherin gear to wear!"

"Mmm, can't we just stay here all day," Bellatrix said in between kisses, "Right. Here."

Hermione wrapped her arms around her, "I would love to, but nothing would get done. I need to go to school, I need to eat, I need to sleep.."

"You don't need school, you're a genius."

"Well if I don't attend classes, we can't stay here, and then we might be separated."

"Well, fine then. But what about when you graduate? What happens then?"

"Hopefully you'll be out by then, back at the Black Manor, or wherever you wish to stay. That reminds me, I know it's your birthday and this won't sound like a good present, but today is the day you have to start the Veritaserum level tests. You're just going to be given the first level test today which is the regular Veritaserum that has always been given. Remember there are five. You have to take one each week. If you pass a level, you go to the next the next week, but if you fail a level, even if it's level 5, you have to go all the way back and do all the tests all over again. You can only do one a week. When you pass all levels, then they'll allow you to leave and do whatever you want."

"And I'll get my wand back?"

"Er, no, you still have to wait until a year since the war ended, then you have to do the tests all over again, and then you can get the wand back."

"THAT'S BULLSHIT!"

"I DIDN'T MAKE THE RULES, BELLATRIX!"

"Ugh, I know…..sorry…it's still bullshit."

"What time is it?"

"7:15."

"I guess I'll get up since I'm awake," Hermione started to sit up but was pushed back down by Bellatrix.

"You don't have to get up, you still have 45 minutes to stay here with me."

"That's right, that's why we're in this position in the first place."

"Don't complain, I know you like it."

"You're right, I really do enjoy it."

"I read your blog entries when I was away and replied. I couldn't sleep."

"You were too busy thinking about those horcruxes."

"Uhh, well….yes, I was as a matter of fact. Is that a problem?"

"No, I just knew you'd be super interested. Don't get any ideas on creating your own though. I'm watching you."

"I wasn't going to create my own."

"I bet you thought about it."

"Well, yes, wouldn't you want me to be able to live happily ever after with you and not die when you're young?"

"You're not going to die when I'm young. I'm young now…..Is that why you don't want me to make a big deal about your birthday, because you feel old?"

"You're basically two years old and I'm five hundred. I just…I don't know. It's just weird."

"I'm sorry. I still love you, no matter your age."

"Well, of course, and I still love you."

"You know, you don't look 47. You look maybe 37, maybe even 27. Are you sure you're 47?"

"I think so. I was born in 1951. That's the only reason I know how old I am, not because I kept track, especially when I was in Azkaban. I lost track of the calendar and time before two weeks was out. Those damn dementors…"

"Well, come on," Hermione pushed Bellatrix up and got off the bed, "I want to eat something before I go to class."

While Hermione was in class, Bellatrix looked through Hermione's books, but, of course, she didn't find the one she was looking for. Most of her books were on the history and care of magical creatures which Bellatrix didn't find interesting at all, especially since it talked a lot about elves. She knew Hermione liked elves. Whenever she thought about how much she cared about them, she thought about Dobby and how her dagger had apparently killed him. She didn't know the elf, so she didn't care for him. She did, though, care about Hermione. And if Hermione cared about elves, Bellatrix had to learn to at least accept them to a certain extent.

She was hoping she would be able to go to the Gryffindor common room and possibly sneak in the girls' dormitory to see if Hermione still had that book. Hermione wouldn't let her out of her sight though and she knew that.

_Perhaps I could just ask her_, Bellatrix thought. _Or perhaps I could get Ginny to distract her, or just get Ginny to get it for me_.

She paced the suite thinking about everything for an hour until Hermione finally came back with Ginny and Luna. Hermione immediately went into the bathroom with a bag of clothes to change into.

"Here," Ginny said handing Bellatrix her own bag. Ginny was all suited up for the match. "You can keep them. And, I hear it's your birthday…" Ginny had a sly smirk on her face.

"I don't know what your expression insists, but it better not be anything to pull attention towards it being my birthday," Bellatrix said grabbing the bag.

"And if it does?"

Bellatrix glared, "You're lucky you're Hermione's best friend. And you," she looked over at Luna who was wearing a t-shirt that was half Gryffindor and half Slytherin along with a hat with a lion and a snake with their foreheads together creating a heart on top, "What the hell is that supposed to represent? You can only root for one team."

"Oh no, I can root for more than one team, Bellatrix, and maybe they'll both win," Luna smiled at Ginny and Bellatrix.

Hermione came out of the bathroom in her normal blue jeans wearing a long sleeved Gryffindor shirt with a hood attached and yellow tinted sun glasses.

"I'll see you guys at the match," Ginny said leaving them.

"Go ahead and put your stuff on and then we'll go," Hermione said to Bellatrix.

Bellatrix came out with a shirt like Hermione's except Slytherin themed. Ginny had gotten her a giant snake stuffed animal which she chose to leave in the room.

"I'm going to stick out like a sore thumb with this green shirt on," Bellatrix said as they left.

"Look, you have a hood, you can act like a death eater and not be suspicious," Hermione laughed and threw the hood over Bellatrix's head.

"I never had a hooded robe like the other death eaters," Bellatrix smirked at her keeping it on.

"Oh yeah that's right, you were special. Anyways, we're not sitting with Gryffindor, we're just going to stand at the sidelines," Hermione told her. "And after the game, I have to take you to the hospital wing so you can take your level one Veritaserum test."

"How exciting, I can't wait for that," Bellatrix said with much sarcasm, "We should go now."

"It'll be fine, Bella. I'll be there with you."

"You will," Bellatrix looked over at her hopefully as they descended the stairs following Luna.

"Of course, I'm the one that supervises you, remember?"

"I think you do more than supervise me." They both smirked.

When they entered the stadium, Hermione sighed when she saw Pansy Parkinson walking near them.

"You better watch out," Luna said looking back at Hermione, "I heard she's going to give you payback."

"Who," Bellatrix asked looking around.

"That blonde girl in the green shirt with the bright silver purse; it's Pansy," Hermione whispered nodding in her direction.

"I can take care of her," Bellatrix went to walk towards her but Hermione pulled her back.

"Don't, I did more damage to her than she did to me. If anything, I deserve her revenge, not that I won't stand up for myself."

"Why can't I stand up for you? You stand up for me."

"That's different."

"Not really, you physically fought for me, which is pretty badass."

"Yeah, well, you're very important to me, and she's a dumb whore. Draco has told me stories, ever since we've become friends, kind of, now that you're in the picture."

"Doesn't Draco play this game?"

"Yes, he's the seeker. Harry is the other seeker. Ron is the keeper and Ginny is one of the chasers. Their twin brothers, Fred and George, used to be the beaters. Now that Fred is gone, George wouldn't play without him, so they have Dean and Seamus playing."

While walking to get into the stadium doors, Hermione was shoved roughly, almost to the ground if Bellatrix hadn't have caught her, by Pansy yelling loudly and obnoxiously, "Oops, watch out for the mudblood pussy cat over here, people!"

Bellatrix reached out and grabbed Pansy's arm making Hermione gasp. Bellatrix gave Hermione a look of promise that she wasn't going to hurt her.

"Say you're sorry," Bellatrix said in a tone of voice she remembered hearing at the Malfoy Manor. People walking around them were staring.

"No," Pansy said shoving Bellatrix away, "I don't say sorry to worthless mudbloods, and I certainly don't take orders from insane freaks like you."

"Say you're sorry, unless you want to get beaten up again by Hermione," said a voice from the crowd, "It's not Lestrange you should be worried about."

"It's Black! It's fucking Black!"

Pansy sneered and left with her friends when the voice appeared with its body. It was a boy wearing a Gryffindor shirt a little bit taller than Hermione.

"Cormac," Hermione sighed grabbing Bellatrix's arm and walking again. He followed them.

_So this is Cormac_, Bellatrix watched him as he tried to inch closer to Hermione's other side.

"No need to worry about her," he said, "Everyone knows a girl like you can take care of business."

"Uh huh," Hermione was trying to ignore him, but he wasn't taking the hint.

"Nice weather for quidditch. Yeah, I could've been the back-up keeper, but I decided to keep my mind on my studies. You know some people call me the male Hermione Granger now!"

Bellatrix rolled her eyes. She wondered what Ginny thought of this boy.

"That's pretty cool, Cormac. Well, we're going to sit at the sidelines." Hermione whispered loudly, "Bellatrix can't sit with anyone except me and Luna."

"Ah, okay," he said disappointed, "Well just text me then if you ever need anything." He smiled and winked at her and left.

"Is that really why we're on the sidelines?" Bellatrix asked.

"No," Hermione laughed, "He just annoys me."

"I read about him in the blog. Who's Viktor?"

"Viktor Krum. He was a very popular quidditch player. I met him in my fourth year when they came to visit Hogwarts. We had a little thing, but it's over, and well, boys just never get the hint as you can see from Cormac."

"Well I'm planning on giving them a hint of my own, especially that damn Pansy if she doesn't leave you alone."

"I was very proud of you for using your words earlier."

"Yeah, I knew you would be upset if I killed her."

"She doesn't deserve the attention of being murdered by you."

"You always know just what to say, don't you?"

"To you, yes. Not so much to others, like Viktor and Cormac, they were difficult. Two ends of the spectrum really, Viktor was very quiet, and Cormac never knows when to shut up."

The game didn't start for another ten minutes and Bellatrix asked Hermione if she could use the bathroom. She had hoped she would be able to go alone, but of course, Hermione left Luna alone and followed her. They were the only two in there, and Hermione waited by the sinks. When she heard the horn announcing the beginning of the game, she piped up, "Are you okay, Bella?"

"Uh huh," came Bellatrix's pained voice.

"Are you sick?"

"N-no.."

"….Are you crying?" Hermione walked towards the stall she was in.

"No, I'm not crying," Bellatrix cried, taking short, quick breathes trying to stifle herself.

"Well you obviously are, come on, let me in."

"No! No…"

"Enough of this "no" business," Hermione whipped out her wand and unlocked the door. She stepped inside and locked it again, taking her sunglasses off. Bellatrix wasn't even using the toilet, she was just sitting on it with her face in her hands. Hermione kneeled down and pried her hands away. She held her face with both hands and started wiping her tears away with her thumbs.

"What's wrong? What upset you?" Hermione thought to herself what could have changed Bellatrix's mood so quickly. All they had talked about was Pansy, and Viktor and Cormac.

"Are you upset because of Viktor and Cormac? Bella, you don't have to worry about them, I promise."

"Well, they're kind of why I got upset…I…you…it's…" Bellatrix pulled away from Hermione. Hermione could sense she was tightening up inside and retreating into a shell she wasn't allowing anyone in.

"No, no, come on," Hermione pulled her back towards her, "Stay with me."

"I-it's…it's just that…."

"Take your time," Hermione whispered rubbing her arms, "Remember to breathe deeply and slowly."

Bellatrix took one last deep breath and continued after exhaling, "The other night…you said you had never let anyone else touch you the way you let me...I was your first, well, almost, not yet….but….I just wish…These..These experiences….I just wish you were my first!"

Bellatrix gasped and broke down again with her face in her hands. Hermione held her and got tears in her eyes and just kept whispering, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

After a minute, Hermione lifted Bellatrix's head with her hand, "But I'm here now with you, and I'm not going anywhere, and I love you."

"Where were you when I was in school?" Bellatrix asked calming down.

"Probably not even a thought yet," Hermione laughed.

"Yeah….I really am old, aren't I?"

"No, not really, and you definitely don't act your age. Come on," Hermione helped Bellatrix up, "We don't want to leave Luna alone any longer."

After Bellatrix calmed down a bit more and composed herself, her and Hermione walked back to Luna.

"It's 20-20," Luna chimed as she saw them walk back up, "See Bella, they're both winning!"

"They both can't win in the end. Can they?" Bellatrix looked over at Hermione who pulled her sunglasses back over her eyes.

"Harry said he's never read anything about what happens if teams tie, or even if it has ever happened before. But maybe this will be the day, Luna!"

And it actually was the day. Gryffindor had fallen behind in points, but when Harry caught the snitch, the two teams had the same score. Madam Hooch said she'd never in her career at Hogwarts seen a match where both teams win, and that this day would be in quidditch history books.

Hermione, Luna, and Bellatrix walked over to the field where the two teams were actually acting civil towards each other.

"Gee, Luna, maybe you could be the new Professor Trelawney since you seem to be able to predict the future," Ginny said as they walked up.

"Hey, nice game fellas," Draco walked up to Harry, Ron, and Ginny with a sheepish smile, "It's nice to get to enjoy quidditch without all the war hassle."

"Yeah, it really is," Harry looked at Draco and put out his hand, "Good game."

"Hey, you guys are all welcome to come to mine and Bella's room for an after party if you like," Hermione said.

"Yeah, it's Bella's birthday!" Ginny shouted obnoxiously loud.

Bellatrix blushed and looked the other way. When she looked back, she caught eyes with Draco. He had a look of pity on his face.

_Did Draco know it was my birthday? What has Cissy told him about me? He might know a lot more than I think he knows._

Bellatrix, Hermione, Ginny, Luna, Harry, Ron, Draco, and one of Draco's friends and keeper of Slytherin, Miles walked together back to the castle. Ginny and Luna were talking about creating a cake with magic with both Gryffindor and Slytherin colors on it, and in very small writing in the corner, "And it's Bella's bday, just saying."

When they got into the castle, Pansy was waiting near the dungeon staircase entrance. When she saw him and Miles continuing up the staircase into the entrance hall, Pansy walked over and grabbed him, "Aren't you coming down to the common room? You know it's this way, silly."

"I'm…gonna go with my aunt for tonight, Pansy, it is her birthday and all," Draco said rolling his eyes when he heard Bellatrix grunt loudly walking past him.

"Oh, so now you actually care about her? Has that mudblood gotten you brainwashed, too, now?"

"_Don't_ call her that! We're not children anymore, Pansy. Using names like that does hurt people, and sooner or later, it does hurt them physically," Draco looked up to see the group had stopped for him. They were looking down patiently. He concentrated on Hermione and Bellatrix, remembering that night at Malfoy Manor when he had witnessed his aunt carve the rapacious word into Hermione's arm. He saw the vision in his head, and he knew Pansy would never understand if she hadn't gone through certain situations. He shoved her off and quickly ran up the staircase to join the others.

"Miles?"

Miles looked like he was torn between the two.

"You don't have to come with us if you don't want to, it's okay, but you are welcome to come if you do want to," Draco said as he watched Miles look back and forth between them.

"Come on, we don't have all day," Bellatrix said.

Bellatrix's words made Miles immediately decide to stay with Draco and the group.

As they continued, Hermione remembered, "Wait, I have to take Bella to take her Veritaserum test! I think it's okay if you guys go to the room before we do. I'm not sure how long it will take."

"That's cool, just text us," Ginny said and led the group up the stairs.

Hermione and Bellatrix went to the first floor and straight to see Madam Pomfrey.

"Nice to see you again, Ms. Black," Madam Pomfrey said rushing around and straightening beds.

She didn't say it, but Bellatrix was grateful that someone finally called her by her proper name.

Madam Pomfrey motioned for Hermione and Bellatrix to sit down in front of her desk. She walked around to sit in her own chair and pulled out a few papers. She got up and left for a moment, returning with a small bottle labeled Level One Veritaserum. She sat down at her desk facing Hermione and Bellatrix.

"Have you ever had Veritaserum before, Ms. Black?" she asked Bellatrix.

Bellatrix shook her head.

"I'm not sure if Ms. Granger here has told you the rules and procedures, but I am to tell them to you now and at every other meeting we have. At each meeting, you will be asked to sign a form saying you are giving permission to be given Veritaserum to ensure whether or not you are a threat to yourself and/or others. It always says that shall you pass all five tests, you will be able to leave Hogwarts at your own accord. Your wand will not be given back to you for another year, which by then you must retake all five levels of Veritaserum. You will take one level each week on Tuesday afternoons. If you pass, you take the next level the next Tuesday. If you fail, you must start at level one, even if you only failed at level five. Any questions?"

Bellatrix slightly glanced at Hermione and then shook her head again.

"Then I would like you to sign and date here at the bottom, Ms. Black. Ms. Granger, if you don't mind, I would like you to sign and date below Ms. Black's signature so that we know who the witness was."

Hermione nodded her head and watched as Bellatrix took a minute to actually sign the form. It was as if she was signing her life away.

_They didn't even let us read the papers at the ministry the day the war ended_, Hermione thought, _At least Madam Pomfrey is letting us in on this information. I think I'll talk to Professor McGonagall later about that._

Bellatrix started signing her name very slowly. When she was done, she put the quill down. Hermione grabbed it and signed underneath.

"There are six questions I will ask you, Ms. Black," Madam Pomfrey said opening the bottle, "You answer yes or no, and that is all, no explanation. Shall we get started?"

Bellatrix looked at the little bottle Madam Pomfrey held out to her. She slowly took it and looked at it. Hermione was glad Madam Pomfrey was being so patient with Bellatrix. Bellatrix put the bottle up and drank it in less than a second. She placed it on the desk and slowly slid it back to Madam Pomfrey who put the cork back in it.

Bellatrix scooted her chair closer to the desk. She put up her elbow and placed her chin in her hand waiting.

"Do you still consider yourself a Death Eater?" Madam Pomfrey asked the first question.

"No," Bellatrix answered quickly.

"Do you have any plans on affiliating yourself with a Death Eater or Death Eaters once you leave Hogwarts?"

Bellatrix snorted, "No."

"Do you have thoughts to avenge Voldemort when you leave Hogwarts?"

Bellatrix took a few seconds to reply, but finally said, "No."

"Do you have any plans on harming and/killing anyone once you leave Hogwarts?"

"…No."

"Do you have any plans on helping anyone break out of Azkaban?"

"No."

"Last question: Is there anyone you're thinking about harming and/or killing right now?"

"Yes."

Madam Pomfrey took out a stamper and stamped the word 'FAIL' on the paper, "Don't feel bad, there are people I'd like to harm, too."

"But there difference between you and I, Madam Pomfrey, is that I would actually do it."

Madam Pomfrey's smile faded a little, "Yes, well, you are all done for today. Come back around the same time next Tuesday and you'll take the same test."

Hermione immediately got up and left with Bellatrix following her.

Bellatrix grabbed Hermione's arm and stopped her as she went up the staircase to the second floor, "Are you mad?"

"No…I don't know…Are you mad?"

"No, I told the truth. That should count for something."

"It does," Hermione pulled her close to her putting her arm around her waist as they walked up the staircase, "Don't worry about it. I know the last question was for Pansy."

"That stupid bitch, it's people like her they should be giving Veritaserum to!"

"You need to not let it get to you, Bella! I understand, I really do. But, just ignore her. She's not a threat, honestly, she's just stupid. She's all talk, trust me. The sooner you do that, the sooner you can pass the first level."

"At least they still let me stay with you."

When they returned to the room, they found Ginny and Luna in the kitchen making the cake, and Harry, Ron, Draco, and Miles in the living room with the T.V. on and hitting each other with the snake Ginny got Bellatrix.

"That's mine," Bellatrix snatched it from the boys and held it to herself. She walked around and sat on the couch next to Draco. "So, how's your mum?"

"She's alright," Draco said turning towards her, "She told me today was your birthday, but that you probably wouldn't care. She said she wanted to call you, but she wasn't sure if you'd like that or not."

"You can tell your mum she can call me anytime for any reason."

"Why don't you tell her yourself?" Draco smiled at her, not trying to sound mean.

Bellatrix texted Narcissa, "I miss you, and I love you."

Narcissa texted back immediately, "I miss and love you, too. I'm coming to visit Friday around 1."

Ginny, Luna, and Hermione brought out pieces of cake to the boys and Bellatrix, and then got some for themselves. They sat around and talked like they usually did when people were over. Because it was a school night, they didn't drink any alcohol, even though they wanted to. Bellatrix was still a little reluctant about it anyways.

When Hermione closed the door after everyone left, Bellatrix came up from behind and wrapped her arms around her, "This was the best birthday ever."

"Why? Because there was cake?"

"No, because I got to spend it with you!"

Hermione turned around in her arms and turned the living room light off. She kissed Bellatrix and carefully guided her to the bedroom. They continued kissing, and Bellatrix laid down on the bed pulling Hermione on top of her. Hermione bent down and kissed her again, seeming to not be able to get enough of Bellatrix. Bellatrix put her hands on the sides of Hermione's face and pulled her face away.

"What," Hermione had a confused expression on her face.

"I never thought I could love someone so different than me so much. I just feel filled with it. It feels so amazing, it feels like a dream. Please tell me this isn't a dream."

"If it is, I don't ever want to wake up."

Bellatrix pulled her face back down towards her and they continued kissing, sucking, and swirling tongues until they both finally fell asleep in each other's arms.


	22. Chapter 22

**Hey, guys.. Sorry it took 5,000 years to update.**

**I feel like this one is a crap chapter, but I'm probably wrong. I only say it's crap because I'm updating when I don't want to, but I do want to update because I don't want to keep you guys waiting.**

**Whatever.**

**I'm student teaching 3****rd**** grade in the Fall!**

**LoveSKINS94: Yeah, so far everyone is getting along, except for dumbass Pansy. There will be drama though, there always is, especially with Bellatrix around.**

**Gothicangel555: Kinda cute? Anything Bellamione is super cute. :P haha**

**Katie: Yessss…Rod and his plans are coming up very soon, if not in the next chapter, maybe the one after that….**

**Violet Temperance: I'm so glad you can relate to my story! I really loved your review. It's crazy, the things that happened to us when we are young that shouldn't have happened are the reasons why we choose our careers sometimes… Bellatrix will talk to Andromeda soon, Neville even sooner. Keep up the good work and positivity in your job!**

Bellatrix was woken up the next morning by Hermione's alarm on her phone. She had the younger witch cocooned in her arms with her back facing her. Angry that she didn't have her wand to blast the stupid muggle device off, she reached over Hermione and grabbed the phone pressing some button, and surprised, turned it off on the first try. She placed it back on the bedside table and gently shook Hermione awake.

"Your alarm just went off," Bellatrix said when Hermione let out a soft groan. Hermione moved a little bit, but didn't get up at all.

"Come on, love," Bellatrix leaned over and whispered in her ear, "You need to get ready for your classes."

"I'm not going today," Hermione mumbled, "I don't want to."

"What?" Bellatrix was surprised that _Hermione Granger_ didn't want to go to her classes. "Why not?"

"I don't feel good. And I'm just not in the mood."

Bellatrix heard the pain and sadness in Hermione's voice, "What's wrong?"

When Hermione didn't answer, Bellatrix turned her voice into her old Bellatrix Lestrange tone, "Tell me what's wrong! Now! Do not ignore me!"

Hermione winced at the sudden change of tone and volume in Bellatrix's voice and turned over on her back. Bellatrix put a hand on her forehead and then her cheek checking to see if she was too hot or too cold.

Hermione opened her tired eyes, her dark circles underneath popping out more than usual, "I started my period last night, it's nothing, I'm just being moody."

"Well that's your first lie to me," Bellatrix said not taking her eyes off of her.

"My face is green, isn't it," Hermione sighed. She turned more towards Bellatrix hiding her face in her chest not wanting her to see her cry. "I've been keeping this in, and I realize I shouldn't have. I know it's going to sound selfish, but I'm just so tired, not of you. I'm just… I don't enjoy my classes anymore, and I'm just sad, and upset about all the deaths that have happened that day… That day here… I miss them, I really miss them. Tonks, and Remus. Professor Lupin, he was my favorite Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. And…. I miss Dobby…And Fred…poor Fred….poor George…and Ginny…and Ron…."

Bellatrix felt a pain in her stomach, pain and guiltiness, knowing that two of those she missed were because of her.

"Dobby…..He did so much for us, Harry, Ron, and I… He saved us… He saved us…"

"…He saved you from me," Bellatrix said out loud without thinking, instantly regretting it, reminding herself that Hermione was trying to grieve for herself, and Bellatrix wasn't trying to steal the attention. "Sorry..," Bellatrix sighed and said gently, "Go on."

"I don't understand why they just expect me, and everyone else, to go on with their lives and start classes again. I just… I feel like I need to go on a holiday or something."

"Maybe you should talk to Professor McGonagall about it, about at least stopping your classes. If they're not helping, then they're a waste of time. Maybe you should talk to someone about your feelings, like, maybe you should talk to yourself," Bellatrix laughed a little, "You were a pretty good therapist when I talked to you."

Hermione pulled away and looked up at Bellatrix, wiping the tears off her face, "I can talk to you."

"I'm not very good with these things… I never know what to say… I never know what to say to make you feel better when you're upset… And besides, I'm part of why you're upset in the first place."

"I've forgiven you for your past, Bellatrix, I'm not trying to throw things in your face again. But, I still miss them, and it's just hard. I don't know how Harry and Ron are getting through, especially Ron and Ginny after what happened to Fred. Just listen to me, and don't judge me, at least try not to. Just do the same thing I did for you. I never said much when you talked."

"Do you want me to take you to Professor McGonagall's office?"

"I just want to lay in this bed forever. I have no motivation to get up at all."

Bellatrix got up and started walking out of the room.

"Where're you going," Hermione asked sitting up a little.

"To the kitchen to wreck havoc," Bellatrix smirked, "That'll get you out of bed."

"No! Can't I just have peace for one day!?"

"Oh, stop being so dramatic, now you're acting like me. I actually started my period last night, too, and I'm not moody."

"That's because you act like you're on your period and moody every other day," Hermione muttered turning her back towards Bellatrix.

"What was that," Bellatrix asked walking back over to the bed and pulled her over to face her, "What did you say?"

"None of your bloody business," Hermione pulled the sheet over her face.

"You can't stay here all day," Bellatrix pulled the sheet off her face.

"You stayed in bed for hours at a time."

"That's different. I'm different. You have a life, a future, great potential to do great things."

"I can't have one day where I just feel like lying around?"

"I may not be a therapist either, but after what you told me about being upset over everything, I really think this is more serious than just "one of those days." You should go talk to Professor McGonagall, or Madam Pomfrey."

"Ugh, I don't want to!"

"What do I have to do to get you up?"

Hermione groaned.

"These are times when I wish I had my wand."

"Crucio would just make me even more tired and sad."

"I wouldn't crucio you," Bellatrix sighed, "I'm not like that anymore…with you."

Hermione didn't answer, but continued sleeping.

"I'm going to call Ginny," Bellatrix said after a minute.

"Okay," Hermione sighed and repositioned herself.

Hermione heard Bellatrix leave the room to call Ginny. She listened to the conversation about Bellatrix's minor worries about her. It was short, not even a minute long. Bellatrix hung up and went back into the room setting her muggle phone next to Hermione's.

"Ginny is coming over with Harry and Ron," she said.

Hermione just sighed. Bellatrix walked closer to the bed and leaned over hugging Hermione, "Is there anything I can for you?"

"Just keep existing," Hermione said with a small smile and her eyes still closed.

When they heard a short knock on the door, Bellatrix quickly went over and let the three Gryffindors inside, "She's in the bedroom."

Bellatrix decided to stay outside, giving them some privacy. That didn't keep her from trying to listen through the closed door though.

"Hermione," Harry quickly walked over to her concerned, "What's wrong?"

"I think I'm depressed….about…all the losses, and just…everything we had to go through. It's worn me out, and I just don't feel like going to classes anymore. I think I've earned way more than my last year of education. I know, I sound arrogant, but it's just the way I feel right now," Hermione sat up and scooted over allowing Harry and Ginny to sit on the bed while Ron stood behind them.

"We understand," Harry looked back at Ron and Ginny, "And others do as well. It's hard just going back to our old lives. And we've done so much, especially you, Hermione. We wouldn't have been able to do half the stuff we did since we became students at Hogwarts without you."

"I love you guys. I don't want to leave you, I just don't want to go to school."

"Is Bellatrix causing you any stress," Ron asked.

"No, if anything, she keeps me on the ball. And if I didn't have classes, I'd be able to focus my full attention on helping her get better. She…she didn't pass the first Veritaserum test."

"That's not your fault," Ginny said rubbing her arm, "Bellatrix has gotten better. She hasn't tried killing any of us, has she?"

"She's definitely calmed down a bit."

"Well, we'll go talk to Professor McGonagall," Harry said getting up, "Are you feeling physically ill? Do you need Madam Pomfrey?"

"No, I'm fine, I just need to rest for the day I think.."

"Okay, well, we'll be back with McGonagall in a little while."

Bellatrix flew across the room quickly when she heard them walk towards the door.

"We're going to go get Professor McGonagall," Ginny said to her, "We'll be back in a bit."

They left the suite and Bellatrix went back in the room to find Hermione lying down again. She got in bed with her snuggling close.

"So you think McGonagall will let you skip classes so we can spend more time together," Bellatrix smiled at her.

"If she doesn't let me….well….I guess I need to think about you before I start making decisions."

"I can take care of myself," Bellatrix held Hermione closer. "Don't let me weigh you down."

"You're not weighing me down. But I do feel like your hand is way too close to my armpit, can you get it away," Hermione laughed for the first time that morning.

Bellatrix laughed with her, "Oh. Well, you know what's next to your armpit, don't you?"

"Yeah, my elbow in your face."

"Oh ho, resorting to physical abuse threats, are we? Maybe I should ask McGonagall for a new supervisor."

"I hope she gives you someone annoying that doesn't stop talking, ever."

"Then what are you going to without classes and me?"

"I suppose I'll write a book about our time together and be super rich and never have to work for the rest of my life."

"Can I write the foreword? Oh! Call it 'The Black Granger.' You know, like The Lone Ranger, because being with me has almost made you an outcast kind of and even though you never wore a mask… Oh you should start wearing one!"

"I'm not wearing a mask, and how on earth do you know about a muggle story like that?"

"I get around."

"Yeah, you're such a whore," Hermione turned around so her back was to Bellatrix now.

Bellatrix leaned her arm over and flicked Hermione's forehead.

"Ow! Why are you being so damn annoying," she got up and lunged herself at Bellatrix pinning her down.

Bellatrix pulled a sheet over her face with only her wide eyes showing, "Wow, you're eyes are on fire, you feisty little witch."

"Yeah, if I could breathe fire, I'd blow it all over your bloody anemic body." Hermione laughed after a second of thinking about what she just said.

"What's funny now? And what did you call my body?"

"Anemic is when you have low red blood cells, and get cold easily, like you, and calling it bloody when it's actually the opposite was funny."

"Muggles and their silly words. Why don't they just use a potion?"

"They _do_ use potions, except their not called potions. And besides, not everything can be cured just like that. Like, for example, your insanity." Hermione snatched the pillow from underneath Bellatrix and smacked her with it.

"Do they have potions for girls who are sassy and sad at the same time?" Bellatrix snatched the pillow back.

Hermione huffed and folded her arms, holding herself. She looked to the ground and started whimpering, "I really do forgive you, for every horrible thing you've done, Bellatrix, but I'm still sad about it. I still miss my friends. I still miss Tonks and Dobby and Remus. And Fred. And Dumbledore….Even Snape."

"Er..I wasn't responsible for all of their deaths though," Bellatrix retorted.

"But I still miss them!"

"Okay, okay," Bellatrix stood up from the bed and clenched her fists nervously at her sides, "Just don't be upset. It-It'll be okay."

"No it _won't_ be okay!... Well, I know it'll be okay. I just feel sad right now, can't you understand that? Haven't you ever missed someone?"

"I missed you. I missed you when I was in Azkaban for that week."

"But haven't you ever missed someone that died? A friend, your family? Your parents?"

"Only my mother is dead."

"What?"

"My father is still alive. I don't miss my mum, because there's nothing to miss, but I was sad about her wasted life. I was sad for her."

"Your…your father's still alive?" Hermione walked closer to her so they were only inches away.

"Who knows what he's been doing the past twenty or so years? Not that I care."

"You…you never….you.."

"I never what?" Bellatrix now folded her arms and was started to feel irritated and impatient about the subject.

"You never…killed him?"

"Why would I kill him?"

"…I don't know, I thought maybe you'd want revenge or something.."

"What? For what he did to me? For what he did to my sisters, and the way he treated us and our mother growing up? I thought about it. I still do. But I had more important tasks to do for the Dark Lord."

"And now?"

"And now..Well now I'm stuck here with you!" Bellatrix was sounding more irritated and impatient by the second. She regretted what she had said right after it came out of her mouth, "I..I'm sorry, I'm sorry…Just…Just don't be upset."

Bellatrix pulled Hermione forward to embrace her, hoping to calm her down before the others got back. She felt Hermione's tense body against hers. She didn't wrap her arms around Bellatrix, just let her hold her. She let Bellatrix rub her hand slowly up and down her back, and after a minute, she cautiously put her head on Bellatrix's shoulder.

"I'm not going to hurt you," Bellatrix said, "You don't have to keep your body all tense. Your body bruises more easily if you tense your body up. Not that I'm planning on bruising you…Just…a random thought I guess."

"I know you're not going to hurt me," Hermione made it sound like it was painful to say, "Not physically."

Bellatrix sighed and pulled away holding Hermione's arms, looking at her face, "You shouldn't take me seriously when I say things like that. I'm just crazy…just stupid. Stupid enough to let myself feel guilty about killing my own niece, and….that _elf_. Making it seem like it was all about me, when I needed to let you vent your feelings."

"But I'm happy that you feel guilty, because you should. But I'm not mad. If I was still mad, we wouldn't be here together. I can forgive, but it's very hard to forget. I still love you. But I still miss them."

Bellatrix didn't say anything. She held back before Hermione caught her staring off into space, "What are you thinking?"

"Selfish things."

"Tell me."

Just as Bellatrix was about to open her mouth, a knock came at the door. Hermione looked in its direction and back at Bellatrix before walking over to open it.

Hermione looked back outside the room when just Ginny and Professor McGonagall walked inside, "Where's Harry and Ron?"

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, and Ms. Weasley here have told me of these concerns," Professor McGonagall started. She glanced over at the bedroom where the door was only open a little bit. She saw a glaring Bellatrix through the slit of the door move away more into the room. "I sent Potter and Weasley with a note to send all students to the Great Hall immediately. You do not have to attend if you don't wish to since I am already here on your behalf."

Professor McGonagall put a hand on Hermione's shoulder and ushered her to the couch. Ginny followed them, but jumped a little when a bang was heard from the bedroom. Professor McGonagall's eyes widened as she looked from the bedroom to Hermione.

"Just ignore it," Hermione sighed, "Go on."

"I am going to allow students to stay here if they wish to study, or earn extra credit doing jobs around the castle, Hogsmeade, and Diagon Alley to help rebuild the community. If they wish, they may go home to their families, and return when the school year would usually start at the beginning of September. You, however, are under different circumstances. You may leave to spend time with your family if you wish. Let me remind me, I am not allowing anyone else besides you and the guards at Azkaban to watch over Ms. Black."

Hermione gulped and nodded allowing Professor McGonagall to continue, "Or, your parents may come and visit you while you stay here at the castle with Ms. Black until she passes all her tests."

Hermione suddenly felt relieved, "Wait, so….all I have to do is stay here and hang out with Bella, not having any classes. And my parents can come and visit anytime? What about my friends?"

"Yes, your friends are still allowed to visit."

"You scared me there for a minute, professor…Well…do I still have to do my seventh year?"

"No, all seventh years will be graduated after everything they have had to endure this past year, especially you, Potter, and Weasley."

"Okay," Hermione said sighing in relief again putting her hand on her forehead, "I'll stay. I'm too tired to argue with Bellatrix about leaving anyways."

"Yeah, that's not the only reason you're staying," Ginny smirked at her.

Professor McGonagall removed herself from the couch and walked to the door, "If you need anything Ms. Granger, I will be here all summer." And she left closing the door.

Ginny got up to leave, "You might want to go check on her in there." Hermione got up and hugged her tightly.

"It'll be okay," Ginny said holding her, "I think Ron and I are going to go home for a while, but we will visit, I promise. And don't worry about me, I'm fine."

Hermione pulled away, "Tell George I'm thinking about him a lot."

When Ginny left, Hermione walked back inside the bedroom to find Bellatrix yet again with her wand setting the dresser on fire and putting it out.

"Bellatrix!" Hermione pried the wand from her hands and went to put it away, "I told you to _stop_ messing with my wand!"

"Well don't keep putting it in places where I can easily find it," Bellatrix replied.

Hermione crawled back into bed and Bellatrix snuggled next to her. Before closing her eyes, Hermione told Bellatrix what was going on. Bellatrix smiled and held Hermione tightly, happy that she was going to be spending more time with her. Bellatrix was even surprised that she kind of chose her over her parents, and that made her arrogance rise. But what increased more than her arrogance was her gratitude towards Hermione; Hermione, who hadn't given up on her yet.


	23. Chapter 23

**Hey peeps! Sorry about another long wait. **

**I saw in one of my chapters (don't ask which one) I mention Narcissa or someone talking to Tonks and Remus, but they're supposed to be dead. So just remember, they're dead. It's horrible, I'm sorry. Take it up with Bella and the guy who killed Remus.**

**This is another one of my short ones (around 2,000 words), but I wanted to get something up for you guys because I felt bad.**

**Thanks again, as always, for all the reviews, favs, and follows! Love you guys.**

It was almost 1 P.M. Thursday. Bellatrix was wide awake sitting at the kitchen table writing a sort of rough draft letter to her sister, Andromeda. Hermione was still asleep in the bedroom. They had napped the rest of Wednesday, the day before, away and stayed up all night talking about nothing and watching movies.

Bellatrix was impatiently going over her letter, waiting for Hermione to wake up. The young witch slept so much these past few days, Bellatrix was starting to believe she really was suffering from some sort of depression. But what should she be sad about? Voldemort is gone. The war was won on her side, and now she's helping Bellatrix.

Bellatrix got up and walked into the bedroom to find Hermione still sleeping on her side, face towards the door. _She looks comfy_, Bellatrix thought. She sighed obnoxiously, knowing it wouldn't wake her from last time's experience. She walked over and started shaking her, "Wake up! You're supposed to be taking care of me!"

Hermione opened her eyes to find a pair of dark ones staring down at her with a demanding frown. She rolled over onto her back and rubbed her eyes, surprised when Bellatrix grabbed one of her arms away and raised her voice, "Stop taking your bloody time and get up! I'm going mad in here."

Hermione quickly stood up and gave her a stern look, "I thought you were starting to like it here," Hermione folded her arms and squinted her eyes as Bellatrix shifted her own.

"I know, like us all, you're only human," Hermione started, "But don't start getting snappy Bellatrix Lestrange on me again."

"Well…" Bellatrix responded, not knowing what to say next.

"Well, what?" Hermione took some clean clothes and went into the bathroom.

"I know, I know, I shouldn't be complaining about being bored. I could be back in Azkaban, and all that, blah blah," Bellatrix followed her and kept the door open with her foot.

"Good, glad we have an understanding," Hermione lightly pushed her away and closed the door.

She came back out after a half an hour and found Bellatrix sitting at the kitchen table. She looked up at Hermione like a little kid waiting to be picked up from school. Hermione walked over and hugged her from behind.

"I-uh..wrote something," Bellatrix mumbled to her, "I've been wanting to take it to the owlery all morning, but I'm a little scared."

Hermione sat down next to her and pulled the piece of paper towards her to read it silently to herself. Although she could see numerous areas where Bellatrix had crossed out a word or even a whole sentence, she was pleasantly surprised she even tried writing to her sister whom she hadn't seen or spoken to for almost thirty years.

_Andy,_

_I hope it's okay I still call you that. Because I still do love you. I've always loved you, and Cissy. Even if I acted like I hated you and everything you stood for. I know things haven't been easy, ever, for any of us. And I know that's no excuse, but I'm writing to you in hopes that you might respond. I cannot get myself to say sorry for the things I've done and mean it, because saying sorry won't rewind time. All I can do is be a better sister than I was before. I am not saying I am a completely changed woman, but I am trying. I am currently staying at Hogwarts under supervision of the ministry, Minerva McGonagall, and Hermione Granger. _

_Hermione has helped me a whole lot, more than she knows. I told Cissy about her, about my feelings towards her. I hope you would be willing to come by and meet her one Friday. Fridays are the day Cissy usually comes to visit me. I know Hermione was friends with your daughter. I've heard nothing but great things about her from Hermione. I can't imagine what you're going through with your loss, and I know earlier I said I wouldn't say sorry for the things I've done in the past. But for that, I am sorry. I never intended to sincerely hurt you that much. I wasn't thinking, and that's obvious. Well, I was thinking, but I was insane. Sometimes I think I still am. But I'm not making excuses for myself! I fully believe I should be in Azkaban still, but I am very lucky to be able to stay with Hermione, and the room I am in is amazing! I have my own bed! Well, Hermione sleeps with me, but she adds to the amazement. But you don't want me to go on and gush about how much I love Hermione. _

_Andy, please respond. I know I was never there when you needed me, but right now, I really need you._

_Your Sister,_

_Bella_

Hermione immediately turned in her chair towards Bellatrix, "Bella, this is very impressive!"

Bellatrix glanced at her with a weird look like she was losing her mind.

"No, no!" Hermione reassured her, "I didn't believe in a second that you would be ready to write your other sister for at least six months…or maybe a little less…I don't know…But I hope you're not pushing yourself because of what I said. I hope these are your real feelings, and it seems like they are."

Hermione smiled sweetly at her and scooted closer. Bellatrix tightened up when Hermione put her arms around her and looked the other way. Hermione put her head on her shoulder, "What's wrong? What are you thinking?" She rubbed Bellatrix's back and patiently waited for her to give her any response at all.

Bellatrix let out a huge sigh, "She's going to be so mad. What am I saying, she probably already is. Not even probably, she _is_."

"Who? What?"

"Andromeda. I killed her daughter. I _killed_ her. I usually don't kill, just torture. But I had to. I had to do it for him. I did it for him. I was a cocky, ignorant coward all for him…all for nothing. In the end…it was all for nothing."

Hermione didn't know what to say. What could you say to that, to make a person feel better? She continued to hold Bellatrix for a few minutes in silence.

"You're not who you used to be," Hermione said gently after a while. "You're not a bad person. Everyone makes mistakes.."

"Yes but not everyone has killed a person!"

Hermione gulped and tried to stay calm, forcing her tears back into the depths of her eyes. She took a hold of Bellatrix's head and kissed her cheek. "Just send it to her," she whispered in her ear, "At least she'll see you're trying. What's the worst that could happen?"

"Ignore me, but she's done that for nearly thirty years, what's the difference? Except I feel bad about it now. Things have changed so much since I came here. I never felt anything when I was with Voldemort. Power and control, but never any real feelings. Now I feel everything, and I don't like all of it. I wish I could just feel the feelings I get when we're close and happy together."

"You're going to have good days and bad days. It's not healthy to be happy all the time, you're a human being, not a positively programmed robot."

"But wouldn't you like me better if I was programmed to always be nice and not sassy?"

"I love you the way you are. You're dynamic, and never boring. Even when you're sleeping, you interest me."

Bellatrix quickly wiped away a tear, "No one has ever cared for me like you have."

"No one ever will or can, because I feel like you're mine now. No one can love you like I do."

Bellatrix sniffed and linked her fingers with Hermione's, "What I feel for you almost seems more intense than love. I love you. I _need_ you."

"Oh, Bella. I need you, too. You think you can just walk into my life like this and I'll be fine if you leave? I'm not buttering you up so you'll behave yourself. We just happen to be very lucky to have found each other, and this was the way we did it."

"You came to me. No one else would have."

"No one else was supposed to, it was always me. I knew at Malfoy Manor that you needed someone. You need guidance, real guidance."

Bellatrix grabbed the letter and folded it. She pulled Hermione up off the chairs with her, "Guide me to the owlery, then?"

After Bellatrix allowed one of the school's black owls to carry away her letter, she heard Neville's voice in the distance calling for Hermione. She got a nervous scowl on her face and turned away when he walked up.

"I was just wondering, since a lot of people have gone back home for the summer, if you wanted to help me rebuild Hogsmeade on Fridays?" he asked Hermione ignoring Bellatrix's presence.

Hermione thought about it and turned around to look at Bellatrix who had her back to them.

"It would only be for two hours, 10-12 in the morning."

"Yeah," Hermione smiled nodding her head, "That will give Bella some free time from my constant nagging."

Bellatrix bit her lip and was getting angrier by the second, but held herself together and continued to ignore them.

"Okay," she heard Neville reply excitedly, "I'll meet you at 9:30 in the common room?"

"Sounds good!"

Neville scurried off and Hermione turned around to walks towards Bellatrix who was still looking away out of one of the windows gripping the ledge.

"Okay?" Hermione asked her.

Bellatrix grunted and turned her face away so Hermione couldn't see her expression. Hermione gave a little sigh while rolling her eyes. She put her arm around Bellatrix's, "Come, let's go back to the room. I want to tell you about Voldemort's horcruxes."

Bellatrix's eyes widened with excitement and curiosity. She sped up the pace towards the castle with Hermione.

The first thing Bellatrix did as Hermione shut the door to their room was spin around and ask the main question about horcruxes she had on her mind, "How do you make one?"

"Um," Hermione was taken aback by her sudden question, "A horcrux? I, er, well…I don't know, I've never made one before." She took her eyes off Bellatrix's as nervously walked to the kitchen to get something to drink. Bellatrix followed her.

"You don't know how to make one, but you know how to find out," Bellatrix said standing an inch behind her.

Hermione nodded her head and turned around. She set her drink down and pushed a strand of hair behind her ears before folding her arms, "I do know how to find out, but, honestly, Bellatrix, I really don't see the reason why…"

"I want to know how he did it!"

"..Why?" Hermione tried to keep her cool and patience with Bellatrix as much as she could. She could tell ever since she woke up that the older witch had been a bit on edge.

"Why? I shouldn't have to tell you. You _said_ you were going to tell me about them!"

"Yes, Bellatrix, I said I would tell you about Voldemort's horcruxes, everything I know. But I'm not going to go digging in dark magic information to find out something I don't need."

"What about what I need?"

"You don't need horcruxes, Bellatrix. You don't need any dark magic. And I'm not allowing you to be around it anymore. I regret even letting you look at that book. It was stupid, and I'm sorry for teasing you."

"What do you know about what I need?"

Hermione just stared her down. She fought with herself about what she should do; yell at her and tell her off, be kind and try to ignore her ridiculous statements, or not say anything and just leave and maybe come back another day when she's in a better and more cooperative mood.

She held herself and closed her eyes, taking small deep breaths while she contemplated.

"How did he _do it_?!" she heard Bellatrix hiss.

"I _don't_ know," Hermione answered, eyes still closed.

"Well you better find out."

"Or what?" Hermione whispered opening her eyes.

Bellatrix stared for a few seconds and unexpectedly turned around and went into the bedroom shutting the door. Hermione rolled her eyes for the second time that day and sighed. She walked over and opened the door to find Bellatrix hiding under the sheets. She got in on her side and curled close to her wrapping her arms around the shivering older woman. Hermione pulled the sheet off her head. They were face to face, and Bellatrix's eyes were open, but they weren't looking at Hermione.

"Talk to me," Hermione rubbed Bellatrix's cheek slowly and softly. She kissed her nose and then her lips and saw Bellatrix meet her gaze.

"I can't."

"What?"

"Talk to you. If I do, you'll send me back again."

"Send- I won't send you anywhere! It's not me! Are you having bad thoughts? Death….Eatery thoughts?"

Bellatrix smirked a little at Hermione's choice of words, then tears started falling down her cheeks. Hermione quickly wiped them away, but they kept falling.

"Do you promise not to tell," Bellatrix cried to her, "I'm trying so hard to be good!"

"Tell me. I promise the only thing I'll do is help you. I'm here for you, always."

"I just….I don't think I can do this, Hermione! I try to be a good person, I really do, but I'm a fake! And I just thought if I could have a horcrux, I could vent my frustrations on people I hated here…like that flower girl.."

"Bella, I told you to ignore her.."

"But I can't! I can't ignore my feelings. If they try to take me back to that place again, I don't think I can make it. I would die, but at least I'd have a part of my soul somewhere. Then maybe I could get back to you, someday."

"Oh, Bellatrix, are you serious?"

"Everything's wrong. Nothing will really be better. It's fine in here, but out there…no one will want me. My sister…she won't want anything to do with me. Everyone wants me back in that place. How I survived fourteen years is a puzzle no one can solve."

"You survived because you were meant to be here with me! We're here together, and we can do this! You won't get better over night. Bellatrix, even you telling me these things shows progress. You keep showing the tiniest bits of progress each and every day, and someday, you'll see that they add up to something huge. And I promise if you stick by me, and trust me, things will get better. Because I love you, and I want you to be happy."

"I just don't want anyone to be mad at me."

"Well, you can't really blame them, Bellatrix. You have to give them time."

"I know! I know! And I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I wish I could say that to them, but you're the only person I can admit it to. Oh, Hermione, what am I going to do? I'm so fucked up…"

"I'll be right back," Hermione left the room and was back in thirty seconds with a large glass of cold water, "Here, drink this, all of it."

Bellatrix sat up and took the glass drinking all the liquid as Hermione had ordered. Hermione took a tissue and wiped the wetness off of Bellatrix's face. She set the tissue and glass on the bedside table. "It'll be okay, it will be."

Bellatrix gasped and closed her eyes.

"What can I do to make you feel better? Even just a little bit?" Hermione asked her.

"I don't know," Bellatrix cried and turned her face away.

Hermione put a hand on her cheek and kissed the other, "Hey, I love you."

"What's there to love," Bellatrix mumbled.

Hermione straddled her and they wrapped their arms around each other. Hermione held her head gently whispering to her, "I love your soul; your funny and caring soul. You care about your family so much. And I know you care about me. I love how intelligent you are, in everything. You do know right from wrong. You're not a bad person…. You're my Bella."

"Why are you so nice and caring? I don't deserve you."

"But you need me, and I need you."

"For what?"

"To love me, and to make me laugh, like you always do. You're not the only person with feelings, you know. I'm just as vulnerable as you are. I would die if you ever left me."

"I would never hurt you, not intentionally."

"And I would never hurt you, intentionally."

"I…I'm sorry…for being a jerk earlier."

"I forgive you. So, are you okay now?"

"I feel a little better. But, I think I'd feel even better if we did that thing where we don't talk."

"Sleep?" Hermione smiled innocently at her.

"No, silly," Bellatrix pulled her forward smashing their lips together.

Hermione happily allowed this to continue knowing the effect of being physical with Bellatrix made things a lot better for both of them.


	24. Chapter 24

**Okay, I'm speeding things up a bit.**

Almost a month had passed. Hermione was quite surprised that after the first Veritaserum failure, Bellatrix had passed the next four weeks. She had one more week to go, and although she was still sassy and grumpy, and scowled every time she saw Neville or Pansy, Hermione had no doubt that Bellatrix would be on her way to freedom from the castle.

It was Friday, June 26. Bellatrix sat up in her bed alone and staring at nothing. Hermione had gone to help Neville in Hogsmeade, but her younger sister, Narcissa was coming to visit, as she always did on Friday mornings while Hermione was away.

She was let in by Bellatrix at 10 A.M. She could tell her older sister was in a worse mood than usual. Bellatrix got Narcissa some tea, but kept pacing the living room making some grunting noises.

"What's the matter, Bella," Narcissa said impatiently setting her tea on the coffee table.

Bellatrix stopped and turned to her, still holding her hands together like she was nervous, "You said you talked to Andromeda?"

"All the time," Narcissa said sadly, and she knew where this was going.

Bellatrix sighed, "Well….I wrote to her….weeks ago, and I haven't heard anything."

"I know you did. She let me read the letter."

"What?! And you never said anything to me? I'm your sister!"

"She's my sister, too!"

"But she left you! She left you to be with that….with that….that…"

"Oh, don't even go there with the situation you're in."

Bellatrix huffed, "I'm not a hypocrite. I never left you. At least not on my own."

"You had your choices, you had to pay the consequences. I love you both in your own special….crazy way."

Bellatrix stomped her foot, and then sat down next to her sister, "W-what did she say?"

"Nothing. She just shrugged and gave me the letter."

"But…doesn't she know you're talking to me? Doesn't she know I'm here, and trying to get…better?"

"Of course, I tell her about you all the time. You have to look at it from her point of view, Bella, that's your problem. You never look at it through another's point of view."

Bellatrix sat back and folded her arms with a pouty look, "I was just thinking of her. When I yelled at her back then and told her she was a disgrace to the family, I was only thinking of her. Only doing it for her own good."

"Okay, so I guess I can kind of see where you're going, but you still need to realize that she was in love."

"So she cared more about him than her own family?"

"Wouldn't you? If you met Hermione back when we were in school, and say she was the same age range, wouldn't you want to be with the person you love? Or would you want to stay at home with our parents?"

Bellatrix thought for a moment, "That girl is so manipulative, so charming. I love that girl more than anything."

"See?"

"It's still different."

"How in the hell is it different?"

"Because Hermione's not like other people! She didn't turn her back on me! _She_ came to _me_ after the dark lord died! She _loves_ me! She loves me, like no one else has."

"Well, until you can find it in that stubborn head of yours that your situation with Hermione is just like Andy and Ted's was, you won't be hearing from her."

"But…but I thought she was still mad because of her daughter," Bellatrix whispered.

"Maybe, I don't know. Like I said, she hasn't really said anything. Bella, you need to show her you're not a threat, and that you mean well, and that you understand her, and you understand what you were wasn't right."

Bellatrix sighed as Narcissa continued, "Well, you know it wouldn't be this big of a deal if she didn't have to watch over her grandson."

"Grandson?"

"Yes. Nymphodora and Remus had a son, only two weeks before Voldemort was defeated."

"But-But I didn't know that!"

"Knowing you, I really don't think it would've made a difference at the time. Besides, you basically did the same thing to that boy, Longbottom."

Bellatrix got an evil glint in her eyes, "That was different."

"Oh well, bloody hell, everything is different with you! You need to stop making excuses for yourself! And you need to stop beating yourself up about it. Just think about what I said, okay? I love you, and Andy loves you, too."

Narcissa pulled Bellatrix over to hold her. As Bellatrix slouched down into Narcissa's arms, she saw the time on the DVD player Hermione had gotten read 12:48 P.M.

"Is it really almost 1?" Bellatrix quickly sat up. "Hermione is late."

"Oh, she's probably just chatting with friends," Narcissa waved it off.

"No, there's hardly any of her friends here anymore. They've been gone. The only one here is that Longbottom boy."

"You said they went to Hogsmeade together."

"But she's usually back around 12:20…"

"Oh, well, I'm sure she'll be around," Narcissa got up to leave pulling Bellatrix up with her to hug, "You take care of yourself, and think about what I was saying. Remember, call me or text me, if you need me for anything."

"But I always need you."

"Oh, Bella, you're so needy. Hermione will be back in a bit."

Narcissa walked out the door and Bellatrix was alone again, and with her thoughts about to where Hermione was. She decided to text her.

Bellatrix: Where are you?

She texted again at 2 P.M.: Are you coming back soon?

Bellatrix fell asleep, and woke up around 6 P.M. to find the suite still void of Hermione. She had no replies to her texts either.

Bellatrix: I'm getting worried.

Bellatrix then thought of something. She texted Ginny about the situation, and asked her to text Neville. Ginny got back to her, but Neville never got back to Ginny.

For a few seconds, Bellatrix thought Hermione had left her for Neville. But she put her anger away, and said that was absurd and Hermione would never do that to her.

It was almost 10 P.M. Bellatrix decided to ask Ginny to tell Professor McGonagall about the situation. Ten minutes later, Professor McGonagall came into Bellatrix suite.

"I'm so sorry I haven't gotten to you all day, Ms. Black," Professor McGonagall was out of breath and had a worried expression on her face, "We have had search parties all afternoon for Hermione and Neville. They disappeared while at Hogsmeade."

"W-…disappeared? What do you mean they just disappeared?"

"We have come to the conclusion that they haven't done this on their own since no one can apparate or disapparate into or from Hogwarts without permission."

"So….they're with someone else?"

"We think they have been kidnapped."

Bellatrix's stomach dropped at the obviousness of the situation. Her face turned more white than usual, and the anger she had been holding in for so long had come to the top.

"Rodolphus," she growled.

"Ms. Black, I am so sorry.."

"You knew what he wrote to us, you knew, but you didn't do anything, and now look what's happened!"

"I know, I know," Professor McGonagall put a silent charm on Bellatrix to keep her from harming her, "But we are going to do everything we can to bring her back. Do you know where the Lestrange manor is?"

"Of course I know where the manor is! I married the fucking brute! But if he has them, he probably has his enchantment on the manor where no one can apparate there without his permission, just like this fucking place! So basically, they're fucked, and there's nothing you and your super heroes can do about it."

"I'm sorry," Professor McGonagall shut the door leaving Bellatrix alone again.

Bellatrix was boiling mad. She didn't know what to do. She didn't want to destroy everything like last time, but she didn't know what else to do. And even after the entire suite was wrecked and she had to hop over all the wreckage, she was still angry, and still screaming. She was still texting Hermione. She almost called Ginny, but wasn't sure she should call her while she was in this state. So she threw her phone at the wall again and smashed it with her shoes. After there was nothing else to destroy, she finally resorted to hurting herself. She didn't use anything but her teeth to bite herself and pull out her hair. She finally exhausted herself out and fell to sleep.

She woke up to find herself strapped to a chair in the hospital wing.

"What is this?!" she screamed . She looked around to find Madam Pomfrey and Professor McGonagall standing in front of her.

"Because of the recent events," Professor McGonagall started, "We are going to let you take your last Veritaserum potion today. If you pass, you are allowed to go to the Black manor where you will be monitored. If you fail, we will have no choice but to put you back in Azkaban."

"FUCK YOU!" Bellatrix was long gone on cooperating with anyone at the moment.

Madam Pomfrey had tears in her eyes as she tried to ask the first question, but Bellatrix interrupted her.

"Don't waste your time, you two useless pieces of dog shit," Bellatrix cackled madly and growled eyeing them both back and forth, "I'll break out wherever you take me, and I'll find that man. Something neither of you can do!"

Professor McGonagall shook her head in sadness and put on the charm she had earlier to keep Bellatrix from harming herself or others. She unstrapped her from the chair she was in and apparated with her to Azkaban.

"At least there won't be any dementors here," Bellatrix stated as if the place she was at was some sort of shopping center they were browsing through, "It'll be easier for me to escape."

"That's where you're wrong," the guard at the front door said to her, "We've gotten them back." He pointed up towards the sky.

Bellatrix slowly looked up and saw about twenty dementors flying above the prison. She suddenly got very cold and tears formed in her eyes. She gulped and thought to herself, _I have memories of Hermione. I'll be okay this time. I will be okay this time._

They took her to her original cell and Professor McGonagall took off the charms, "I will be visiting every week like last time. We won't give up on her, Bellatrix."

Bellatrix went to her corner and curled up into a ball, shivering and whimpering. It had been two years since she actually been around any dementors. She heard them swaying towards her cell, and she thought of anything she could to fend them off: Hermione, Hermione's smile, Hermione's laugh, Hermione's smell, Hermione's warm arms.

She thought it had actually worked. She didn't hear them, and she opened her eyes. Staring wide-eyed at the wall, she turned her head slowly to come face to face with one of the dementors. She panicked and the dementor started sucking her soul. All she saw were horrible memories from her childhood, and she felt nothing but sadness, anger, loneliness, and revenge.

She had given up. The dementors tormented her for two and a half weeks. She wished for the dementor's kiss, but they wouldn't let her off that easy.

Bellatrix didn't know it, but it was Tuesday, July 7. For the first time since she had gotten back to the prison, she felt a bit of relief. She opened her eyes and the dementors were gone. The clouds outside covered the moon and she was in complete darkness. She waited, still wide-eyed, in the darkness for the monsters to come back. She started breathing hard when she heard someone walking down the hallway. She covered her mouth with both hands. She saw two dark figures, one carrying a lamp. Her heart skipped a beat and she almost threw up when she saw the second dark figure. It spoke to her, one word, softly, and as sweet as she remembered.

"…Bella?"


	25. Chapter 25

Bellatrix pushed herself into the corner of her cell as much as she could. She didn't know if she was dreaming or if the gates to her cell were really opening.

"Bella," the woman said in a stern voice no longer resembling that of some sort of angel, "Get up off the ground, unless you want to stay in here."

Bellatrix gave the woman a dirty look, but then changed it to look apologetic, "Why did you come back for me? Why you, after all this time?"

The first figure stayed out of the cell while the one that was speaking to Bellatrix moved forward. Bellatrix squinted her eyes from the lamp. The woman's face came into view, looking exactly like Bellatrix's. She'd say she was looking into a mirror, except her hair was lighter.

"Well come on," Bellatrix's sister, Andromeda said, "Do you want my help, or not?"

Bellatrix turned her face away stubbornly. Andromeda rolled her eyes and sighed.

"Don't try to make me feel bad for you. I've come to take you back to Hogwarts. Hermione is there..," Andromeda told her.

"Hermione?" Bellatrix stood up so quickly she fell back to the ground from not walking around for two and a half weeks.

Andromeda grabbed her arms and helped her up. Bellatrix stared in Andromeda's eyes, "I-is she okay?"

Bellatrix's expected question was whispered with fear.

"Yes," Andromeda told her, "She's been there for a week. She was in a sort of coma, but…she's woken up, and she's okay."

Bellatrix scrunched her face, "A coma?"

"…From the cruciatus curse…"

Bellatrix lowered her eyes; ashamed of all the times she had ever used it on anyone, "Is she…"

"She's fine," Andromeda said, "She's just tired and achy. She's lost no memory, and there seems to be no other brain damage."

Bellatrix gasped, trying not to let her younger sister see her cry. She grabbed onto Andromeda's shoulders and continued to look at the ground. Andromeda grabbed her wrist and led her out of the cell. The guard followed them to the entrance and helped sign her out before escorting them to the apparating point.

As they approached the point, Bellatrix turned her head away from her sister and whispered something too softly.

Andromeda didn't hear her clearly, but thought she heard a 'thank you.' She didn't reply. They apparated to Hogwarts and Bellatrix immediately led the way to the hospital wing where she knew they were probably keeping Hermione. She burst into the waiting room to find it completely empty, except for Neville, who had a few scratches, but nevertheless, looked okay. She looked over at him and then away as if he was just another stranger. Andromeda walked in after. Bellatrix tried to open the door to the actual wing, but it was locked. Not a minute later, the door opened and Professor McGonagall poked her head out unsurprised to see Bellatrix.

"..Let me in!" Bellatrix shouted.

"Not at the moment, Ms. Black, you'll have to wait here with Mr. Longbottom for a while," Professor McGonagall said.

"Why?!"

Professor McGonagall answered by closing the door and locked it again. Bellatrix responded by kicking and punching the door.

"Bellatrix," Andromeda got her attention, "I'm going to Cissy's manor, I will speak with you later."

Bellatrix just looked at her without saying anything. Andromeda looked over at Neville who was staring off into space. She looked back at Bellatrix and then turned around and left. Bellatrix folded her arms and paced the room ignoring Neville for fifteen minutes. Professor McGonagall came out and locked the door again.

"She still cannot be seen at the moment," she said to Bellatrix who immediately walked up to her.

"Why not?!" Bellatrix screamed, "Why won't you tell me? What are you keeping from me?"

"Perhaps you should ask Mr. Longbottom your questions, he would know better than I what happened." She walked out of the waiting room. Bellatrix looked over at Neville who had put his face in his hands and was breathing loudly. She clenched her fists at her sides and bit her tongue as she slowly walked towards the boy. Then something occurred to her.

Bellatrix kicked Neville's shin and pulled him up by his shirt, "You were supposed to take care of her while she was with you!"

Neville's face was red, "I-I know, I know! I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything! Please…please….just let me be!"

For the first time in a long time, Bellatrix weighed her consequences on what would happen if she continued to harm Neville now, or if she let him go. She knew Hermione wouldn't want Neville hurt. She threw him back into his chair, "Tell me what happened."

"I really don't want to talk about it right now.."

"TELL ME! NOW!"

"Okay…okay, well it all happened so sudden…we were just coming out of the Dogweed and Deathcap shop…"

Bellatrix pulled a chair in front of Neville and sat down, trying to calm herself while he continued.

"We were standing right next to each other, and I felt a hand on my shoulder. And then everything was black…Like I had passed out, but it didn't feel like I passed out and slept, it felt like I just blinked and everything suddenly turned black. I randomly ended up in a dark and dank place."

"You were in the downstairs cellar," Bellatrix whispered.

"Yeah, I didn't know whose cellar I was in. But I at least knew Hermione was with me. I could hear her screaming….crying….the most awful sound I've ever heard in my life. I think it was her that woke me up."

Bellatrix squeezed her eyes shut and dug her nails into her legs remembering how she had made Hermione scream and cry the same way that one night at Malfoy Manor.

"I don't remember how long we were there, but it was at least for seven days. I only heard Hermione's screams, all day, and all night. I couldn't understand how she hadn't passed out and stopped screaming at some point."

"He kept her awake on purpose," Bellatrix whispered opening her eyes.

"He…Yes, he…you knew..didn't you?"

"I knew he was coming for her. He wrote me….and I let her read it, and we took it to McGonagall, but she waved it off."

Bellatrix filled with anger towards the headmistress, but buried it and continued asking Neville questions, "How did you get away?"

"One day, or night, whatever it was….He finally came down and took me out of the cellar. He dragged me to the room where he had Hermione. She was sitting, unconscious, against a wall. He asked me if I was ready to receive the same fate as Hermione, and as my parents…I suddenly got a burst of angry energy and started fighting him, I punched him, and he threw me to the ground. He put the cruciatus curse on me and I seriously think I died and came back to life when it was done. He walked over to Hermione and bent down smacking her face to see if she'd wake up, but she didn't. I glanced to the other corner of the room and saw the idiot left Hermione's bag over there. I crawled over there without him noticing and pulled her wand out. He turned and saw me and drew his wand again. I tried to stand, but I felt too weak. He walked over and pulled me up by my hair, and even though it seemed like he had the upper hand…I screamed it…and I killed him….and I screamed it, I screamed the killing curse, and I killed him!"

Neville broke down into tears and put his face back in his hands, "Oh god, please…I killed him, but I didn't mean it to be that way…"

Bellatrix's eyes were wide and she lifted her hands like she wanted to hold Neville's, but hesitated and looked away as he continued, "I'm not a murderer, but I killed him, and there was no other way to save her! My god, Bellatrix, what am I going to do? My life is ruined! What am I going to do? I don't think I can live on knowing I killed a man, even if he was the one who put my parents the way they are."

Bellatrix looked back at him, "He-he only used the curse on your mother. Not your father."

"I don't care who did what to who, what matters is it happened, and revenge was not in my plan."

"..Neville…I need to tell you something…..Rodolphus…..he didn't torture your father, because I did…"

"Well, tell me something else I don't fucking know."

"I…uh….Well, I only did it because he upset me."

"Because he wouldn't give you information on voldemort."

"No…no, he said some things to me that really hit me hard."

"Like what? You're a crazy, sadistic bitch?"

"He said I was hopeless. And that no one would ever love me, or even ever could love me. Like even before I met the dark lord, I was destined to be this way."

"…I don't think he would have said that. I don't think my father, or my mother, would ever say that, not even to you."

"Did you know them?"

"..Well, no, but.."

"But because they're on the _light_ side, they can't possibly do or say anything to hurt anyone. I can show you my memory if you want to still think I'm a liar. But let me make one thing clear, Longbottom, I never lie. I never lie, because I have no reason to. I'm not the kind of person to lie. You should know by fighting against me in the war about how blunt I am… But you know what, I'm not going to show you my memory. I know I'm not the _best_ person in the world. I've done a lot of awful things that I still haven't fully paid for, thanks to Hermione for being so wonderful. I don't think I have to prove myself to you; not anymore."

"I…I'm sorry, Bellatrix. I'm sorry for the way I've acted since you came back to Hogwarts with Hermione. She always talked to me about giving you another chance, and looking at things from your point of view. And…I…I forgive you…for what you did to them. I forgive you for torturing my parents. You grew up in a different environment that basically forced you to be that way. You were surrounded by people who all thought that way, so why would you think any differently?"

"That still doesn't excuse me of it, though."

"Well, now you know, my father was wrong. You're all Hermione ever talks about when we go to Hogsmeade."

"You're lying," Bellatrix smiled a little for the first time in almost a month.

"No. I'm glad we had this talk. I think Hermione will be happy we finally did."

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine. They're just checking her. I haven't left the hospital wing since we got back. I feel like it really was my fault this all happened."

"No, it wasn't. It wasn't anyone's fault but Rodolphus'. We all need to face the consequences of our actions, and stop blaming others. I know I've definitely faced lots of consequences over the years, and I know I still deserve a hell of a lot worse than this. I'm very lucky to be here with Hermione."

"You are."

Just then, Madam Pomfrey opened the door, "You can come in if you like," she left the door open and Bellatrix shot up, Neville following her. Bellatrix saw Hermione lying awake in the first bed.

"Ooowww," Hermione said as Bellatrix ran over and threw herself onto her.

Bellatrix loosened her grip a little but didn't let her go.

"Oh, my crazy Bella, I'm so glad to see you again, and I'm so sorry you ended up back in that horrible prison" Hermione said as she wrapped her arms around her.

"Don't you still look like shit," Neville said stopping at the end of the bed.

"Says you," Hermione smirked at him, "Have you even slept since we got back?"

"Your Weasley friends and Potter came by to see you right before you woke up," Madam Pomfrey said before going into her office, "But this one has been here day and night."

"Neville!" Hermione looked at him with a motherly expression, "Go to bed. Now."

"Sure?"

"I'm fine, Neville! Really!"

"Yeah, she doesn't need you anymore," Bellatrix nuzzled against Hermione.

"Shut up, Bella," Neville laughed and walked out.

Hermione looked down and saw a smile on Bellatrix's face, "Are you two…_friends_ now?"

Bellatrix grunted and shrugged, and Hermione laughed.

"We have a lot to talk about," Hermione yawned, "But I think you should go back to your room and take a shower and rest. I have to stay here until tomorrow morning."

"No," Bellatrix immediately answered, "I'm never leaving your side again. Ever."

"I can smell Azkaban on you though. And you need to sleep in a normal bed."

"I was in Azkaban for fourteen years, Hermione. I think I can handle another night in hospital wing."

"I'll be fine. Madam Pomfrey can take care of me."

"But what if something happens?"

"Like what? I'm physically healthy, they already know that. They just want to let me rest here for the night, just in case. And Rodolphus is dead, thanks to Neville.."

"He's really taking it hard."

"Is that what you…._bonded_….over?"

"Yeah, we talked. We talked about his parents, and I told him what I told you. I think things are okay between us now."

"I'm glad." Hermione yawned again, "Oh, go on, Bella. This will even be your first time walking around the castle without me chaperoning you. But promise me you'll go straight to the room. And text me when you get there so I know. Take a picture of yourself so I know you're actually there."

"You don't trust me?"

"I don't trust your sneaky, curious, adventurous side. Go on, shower, and go straight to bed. It'll be tomorrow before you know it, and I'll be with you again."

Bellatrix looked up at her wide big teary eyes.

"Oh, Bella, don't cry," Hermione sighed, "I'm fine."

"What did he do to you?"

"I'm tired. We'll talk about it tomorrow, okay? But it's over now. And it's not your fault. Okay?" Hermione put her hands on Bellatrix's cheeks and kissed her severely dry and chapped lips, "I love you. Now go."

Bellatrix sighed and slowly walked out of the hospital wing and out of the waiting room. She looked out a window and saw it was dark outside. She took her time walking up the staircase to her room. She missed it. When she had first came to Hogwarts to be helped by Hermione, the room almost served as another prison, but now it was more than that.

She showered and tucked herself in her warm bed after sending Hermione the picture of herself in the living room with her lower lip stuck out. She remembered how she had failed the last Veritaserum test, and knew she had to start all over again, but wasn't upset anymore. She didn't mind staying in the room, as long as she had Hermione with her.

Hermione's presence had changed everything. And although she tried to get herself to fall asleep quickly so morning would come, she couldn't help but have memories of her and Hermione swirl around in her head all night. Everything was better with Hermione in the picture. Her sister, Andromeda, had even talked to her. She even got her out of Azkaban, and although she was still pouty with Bellatrix about their past, she still treated her as her sister.

Without Hermione, she wouldn't have talked to Andromeda. She wouldn't have talked to Neville about his parents and how she felt about it. She wouldn't have any friends. She would still be in Azkaban. Her life would hold no purpose.

She vowed to herself that now that she isn't serving the dark lord, her purpose shall be to serve those she had hurt in the past. She wanted to make things better. In her head, it all sounded to wonderful and easy, but she knew it was going to be a hard and long road ahead. She wasn't afraid, because she was no longer alone, like she was for most of her life.


	26. Chapter 26

**I don't know how long it's been, but here's something for you guys. I started student teaching (5****th**** grade) and it's amazing! I have a very great cooperative teacher.**

**I hope you guys are all having a good Fall semester! And if you're not in school, well, I still hope you're having a great Fall!**

Bellatrix was just dozing off at 7:30 A.M. when Hermione walked into the room. She lifted herself off the bed a little with tired eyes as Hermione entered the bedroom and crawled in beside her.

"Go back to sleep," she whispered pushing a strand of Bellatrix's hair behind her ear before gently pushing her back down into the comfy bed. Bellatrix had no problem listening to her young hero and closing her eyes. Hermione held her close and closed her own eyes, despite still feeling a little achy from her time at the Lestrange manor. She wasn't too worried about her body aches, just more of her throbbing headache. She decided she was going to confront Professor McGonagall when they were both awake and feeling well. She was outraged when she heard Bellatrix was in Azkaban most of the time she was away and the whole controversy surrounding the last Veritaserum test was totally unfair, she thought. Bellatrix was really making good progress. And now she has talked to her other sister, and she has had a civil conversation with Neville. Hermione almost wanted to just leave Hogwarts with Bellatrix and take care of her on her own, but then they'd be on the run, and that is no way Hermione wanted Bellatrix to live the rest of her life. She deserved a second chance at having a normal life with loving family and friends.

Hermione only slept for a few hours, but it was off and on because of her headache. Bellatrix was snoring comfortably under the covers. She got up and decided to clean the suite noticing Bellatrix has trashed the place about a month earlier. No one had thought of to come up and check on it, though there'd be no reason for them to. She waved her wand yawning and holding her head. Once the room was completely clean and everything was repaired, she took some medicine and sat down to text Harry.

Hermione: I have a headache. I feel like you when Voldemort was inside your head.

Harry: Probably just from the curse.. Did you take any medicine?

Hermione: Yeah, just did, but I'm tired and I want to sleep, but it's keeping me up.

Harry: I'm sorry. How's Bellatrix?

Hermione: Fine. Sleeping. Lucky her.

Just when Hermione sent that last text message, she heard a moaning come from the bedroom. She set her phone down and immediately walked over to see what was wrong. She saw Bellatrix still sleeping, but tossing and turning and gripping the covers tightly. She whimpered when Hermione sat down on the bed. Hermione carefully embraced her and gave her sweet shushing sounds and reassurances. After Bellatrix sniffed and stopped with her night (or in this case, day) terrors, Hermione looked down at her hand on Bellatrix's arm and felt a hot rage build up inside of her. She hated how they handled things while she was gone. She knew it was ridiculous to think touching Bellatrix gave her extra madness and anger about the whole situation, but she took her hand away and left the room anyways. She quietly shut the door and begin to ponder about the most impossible things.

She looked over at the kitchen table and saw her and Bellatrix's blog still sitting where it usually sits. She decided to go write about her time with Rodolphus in it. She just didn't feel like saying anything out loud about it; and she sincerely hoped that the ministry wouldn't make Neville go to court for killing Rodolphus. She knew if that happened, then she would definitely have to talk about it out loud. She didn't want any of that, she didn't _need_ any of that. It was unfair to Bellatrix, who for once did the right thing and acted the way a normal person would act.

Hermione stared at the blank page for almost thirty minutes. She just couldn't bring herself to write anything down. The only other person who really knew what happened to her while she was away was Madam Pomfrey. She knew Bellatrix would find out somehow, and she would be angry if she had to find out from someone other than her. She was afraid, and knew that she shouldn't be, because she knew that Bellatrix would understand. She just didn't want Bellatrix Black to get so upset that she turns back into Bellatrix Lestrange, and she just knew Bellatrix was going to be upset.

She didn't know what to do. Hermione felt helpless and like she was losing control as each second passed. The second hand of the clock ticked along with her heartbeat that she could feel ringing in her ears.

She needed to talk to her parents. They needed to know everything that was going on with her. Did they even know she was gone?

"M-mum?" Hermione stuttered about to cry as her mother answered the phone.

"Sweetheart, you sound upset! What's the matter?" her mother answered showing no sign that she knew anything about her whereabouts the past almost month.

"I..I need you, mum. Please…can you come? Can you and dad come and be with me?"

"What…to Hogwarts? Hermione, I don't even know how I would get there!"

"You're right," Hermione took a deep breath and tried to calm herself down, "I'm going to talk to Professor McGonagall, I'll call you back."

"Okay, well hurry! You've got me very worried now!"

She hung up and turned around to see Bellatrix pulling the bedroom door open, "Are you okay?"

Hermione tried to hide her flushed face. Someone knocked on the door and she opened it.

"Good," Hermione said, "I need to talk to you."

"And I to you, Ms. Granger," Professor McGonagall nervously said as she walked in.

"We have a lot to talk about."

"That we do."

"First off..I really would like my parents to be here with me for a few days. Is there any way you can apparate them here?"

"I give you permission to apparate to them in this room."

Hermione was glad the rules of apparating to and from Hogwarts had changed. She quickly got both her parents and apparated with them back into the suite.

"Nice to see you again, Mr. and Mrs. Granger," Professor McGonagall greeted them.

Bellatrix heard them and quietly closed the door and stayed in her room, but still listened to every word that was being said.

Hermione sighed, "Mum, dad…I don't mean to bring you into any of this, but I'm very upset right now."

"Hermione, what is this all about?" her mother asked her.

Just then, Kingsley Shacklebolt and Madam Pomfrey apparated into the room making Hermione's parents scream.

"Well, now that most of us are here….," Kingsley said, "We all need to have a very important meeting about all of this."

"I agree," Hermione had a shake in her voice, "I'll get Bellatrix."

Hermione walked into the bedroom and shut the door. Bellatrix was sitting on the bed staring at her.

"My parents, Shacklebolt, Pomfrey, and McGonagall are outside. We need to talk to them, together," Hermione said.

Bellatrix thought for a moment, "Why do I need to be there?"

"Because part of this concerns you."

"Part of this? Not the whole thing?"

Hermione turned her face away, "This..I really don't want to talk about what happened, but..I'm going to have to…. And, I need you. I need you to be there by my side…."

Hermione looked back at her with tear-filled eyes, "Please?"

"What about your parents?"

"What about them?"

"They're not going to like me, Hermione."

"You haven't given them a chance! They're good people, trust me."

Kingsley opened the door, "Look, I don't have all day to wait around."

Hermione was almost filled to the top with anger she had been holding in. She wanted to cry and shout all at the same time. But she kept her mouth shut and grabbed Bellatrix and dragged her out into the living room. There were no introductions as Kingsley started talking right away, "Ms. _Black_ will not be able to live here in these quarters alone, and we don't think you are emotionally healthy enough to deal with this right now."

"What do you know?!" Hermione finally shouted, and then turned to Madam Pomfrey, "Did you tell him?"

"Tell me what?" Kingsley asked as Madam Pomfrey shook her head, her face full of fear and eyes filled with tears.

"If you're talking about what happened the weeks you were gone, then you need to wait, because I have an agenda, and right now, we're talking about your ability to watch about Bellatrix Black," Kingsley told her.

"I'm fine!" Hermione shouted, getting angrier and more emotional by the second, "I'm fine, and Bella would be fine, too, if you didn't keep sending her back to Azkaban every time I go away!"

"Where did you even go," Hermione's father asked; both her parents completely confused by everything being said.

Hermione took a deep breath, "Neville and I were kidnapped, and taken hostage for two weeks."

"What?" Hermione's mum shouted.

"By who?" her dad demanded.

"Her ex-husband," Hermione gestured towards Bellatrix. Bellatrix gave them a nervous expression and looked away. "A lot of bad things happened, and…I really am not ready to talk about it. Madam Pomfrey, I give you full permission to tell them, because I'm a coward." Hermione started crying, tears streaming down her face. Bellatrix wanted to go comfort her, but her mother beat her to it. Instead, she focused on her anger inside.

"Well," Madam Pomfrey started with a shaky voice, all eyes on her, "It was late, a week ago, and I was just getting ready to go home when Neville came walking in carrying an unconscious Hermione. Neville only had a few scrapes and bruises, but Hermione… She was something that needed to be taken care of right away. Her clothes were practically ripped off of her, she was covered in bruises, bloody cuts, dirt, and….hair. It was obvious that someone had beaten her half to death. When I removed all her clothes and did a full body exam, I came to another horrible conclusion…"

Hermione pulled away from her mother and covered her face with her hands, not wanting to look at anyone.

"It was obvious to me..," Madam Pomfrey continued, "That she had been raped."

Hermione gasped, hands still covering her face, but she tried running to the bedroom. Bellatrix grabbed her and tried to hold her still. Her mother had her hands on her own mouth as her father stood there in total shock. Bellatrix held on tightly to Hermione and didn't let her go. She looked back at Madam Pomfrey, "Who?"

"Fenrir Greyback," Madam Pomfrey broke down into tears, remembering Fenrir when he was little, and how she used to take care of him during full moons. "And that explains the hair."

Hermione quieted down, but was still being held by Bellatrix with her hands over her face. Bellatrix allowed her to keep them up, because she knew how she felt.

"Well," Kingsley said, "Ms. Granger is obviously not fit to watch over Ms. Black right now."

"You're NOT sending her back to Azkaban!" Hermione took her hands down, turned around, and shouted at him. "She doesn't need to be there, she needs to be here with me! And I need to be here with her! We're good for each other, if you could just see that…if you would just do you're fucking job, none of this would have happened in the first place!"

Kingsley contemplated for a moment while Hermione continued, "If she goes back to Azkaban, for the hundredth time, you might as well send me there with her."

"No," Bellatrix said with wide eyes, "Hermione, you don't know what you're saying.."

"Yes I do! I'm supposed to be the smartest witch of my age, now start treating me like it and listen to me!"

"Fine," Kingsley finally said, "You can stay together here like you were, but she still has to retake all her Veritaserum tests."

"That's fair," Hermione was surprised to hear Bellatrix say.

"Your parents cannot stay here though," Kingsley said looking over at them, "I'm sorry, it's just not safe."

After five minutes of separate discussions between each other, Kingsley left along with Madam Pomfrey. Professor McGonagall waited until Hermione was back from apparating her parents home. Hermione promised them she would call them every day.

"I'm really sorry," Professor McGonagall said to Hermione when she came back, "I never meant for her to get hurt."

"Thank you for all your help, professor," Hermione respectively said.

When Bellatrix and Hermione were finally alone again, Hermione turned away.

"Don't," Bellatrix walked over to her and spun her around so they were face to face, "Don't keep this from me. You know I know how you feel."

Hermione started crying again and held herself looking down, "I feel so ashamed! I feel so dirty…and broken, like I'll never be the same again."

Bellatrix wrapped her arms around her and held her as close to her as she could, "I know, I know how you feel, but believe me when I say it does get better. And you shouldn't feel ashamed, even though I know you will, because…I did…and you're not dirty. None of this was your fault. Do not blame yourself."

"But I…But I, I really wanted my first time to be with you."

"And I wanted _my_ first time to be with _you_, but that's life. I promise you'll be stronger because of this." Bellatrix put her hands on Hermione's cheeks and lifted her face up, "I am so sorry, Hermione. Do you…blame me? I mean..do you regret having anything to do with me now? Like, this wouldn't have happened if we weren't together."

"I will never regret doing anything with you. I love you. Why do you think I almost had a rage black-out on Shacklebolt earlier?"

They let each other go and Hermione walked over to the window. It was a gloomy day. "He's still out there."

"Greyback," Bellatrix walked over and stood beside her looking out the window, "I should've known."

"What?" Hermione looked at her.

"That day at Malfoy Manor…I promised Greyback he could have you after I was finished interrogating and torturing you. He wanted you bad…not that I could blame him."

"Let's do it right now," Hermione gasped turning more towards Bellatrix.

"What?"

"Please, make me forget about him!"

"No, Hermione, it doesn't work that way. I love you, but no, that's the last thing you need right now. Just take it easy, and let me take care of you in other ways."

Bellatrix took care of, sat with, and held Hermione the rest of the day and night. Her love for Hermione was strong, but in the back of her mind, she still had the thought of revenge for Fenrir Greyback. She itched for her wand, and the way it tasted when she whispered 'crucio.' She wanted him to pay. She wanted him and everyone else to pay.


	27. Chapter 27

In the wee small hours of the morning, Bellatrix felt Hermione shift in her arms. She felt her get up off the bed and heard her walk into the bathroom. After a few minutes, she came back and laid down again.

"How are you sleeping," Bellatrix whispered to her.

"I..I haven't really been sleeping," Hermione told her, "I've just been resting my eyes…"

"Are you afraid to go to sleep," Bellatrix wrapped Hermione in her arms holding her close.

"…Yeah…Bella? Did you ever have nightmares…about what your dad, Rodolphus, and his friends did to you?"

"Every once in a blue moon, but it wasn't half as bad as what it really was. I'd rather have those then the painful memories and flashbacks I have when I'm awake."

"I guess I'm going to have to go to sleep sometime."

"We both are, we both can. It'll be okay. It'll be rough, but it will be okay, nothing you and I can't get through together."

"Together. I don't ever want to separate from you again, but…"

"But what?"

"I just feel so messed up…now. I don't think I am fit enough to take care of you. But I don't want you to go back to Azkaban _again_!"

"If you need time away, if you need time to help heal yourself, do it. Don't let me keep you from getting better. I'll go back to Azkaban a million times if it meant you were safe, healthy, and happy."

"But I won't be happy. I'll miss you… It's not fair."

"I know, nothing's ever fair."

"What am I going to do? I can't lie. And I can't pretend to be helping you."

"But you don't even have to try. You help me just by being here with me."

"I'm sorry again for being such an emotional baby."

"Sweetheart, you've been through so, _so_ much. You're so strong. You're so smart. And you're so stubborn, but you need to go to sleep. Whatever decisions that need to be made will be done in the morning when we wake up."

Bellatrix hugged Hermione close kissing her forehead and rubbing her back. Hermione wrapped her arms around Bellatrix's middle and laid her head against her chest.

"Wait!" Hermione sat up, "What if we both have one of our dreams at the same time and scratch each other to death?"

Bellatrix laughed and pulled her back down, "What are the odds of that happening, Hermione? Come on, you're supposed to be the logical one. You really need to sleep."

It was 8:30 A.M. and Hermione woke up shivering.

"Hermione?" Bellatrix felt her arms and forehead, "You're freezing! Let me run you a hot bath."

Hermione walked into the bathroom a minute later, "Thanks, Bella, I think I'll be okay now."

"Sure you don't need any help," Bellatrix gave her a cheeky grin.

"No, I'm fine," Hermione gave her a nervous smile.

Bellatrix immediately changed her expression.

"Really, I'm fine," Hermione sobbed and turned around so her back was towards Bellatrix.

Bellatrix walked over to her and grabbed her shoulder, squeezing it. Hermione gasped loudly, making Bellatrix quickly take her hand away.

"Sorry," Hermione said, still not facing Bellatrix, "I think I have a little bruise there."

Bellatrix pulled back Hermione's shirt off her shoulders and saw two dark bruises, one on each side of her back below her shoulders. Hermione turned around and pulled the shirt back up, "It's okay, I'll be out in a while, okay?" She gave Bellatrix a reassuring smile. Bellatrix had on a blank facial expression as she turned around and walked out of the bathroom. She walked into the kitchen and an angry scowl formed on her face. She was furious. She wanted to kill Fenrir Greyback. She wanted to torture Kingsley Shacklebolt and Professor McGonagall. And just for kicks, she wanted to torture that Pansy girl.

But she took in a deep breath, and tried calming herself. Even though she badly wanted to wreck the suite for the third time, she didn't want to upset Hermione. She sat down at the kitchen table with her face in her hands trying to keep calm and not to scream bloody murder. She didn't want Hermione to have even more stress because she couldn't handle herself. She needed _someone_ to help her though, and she wasn't about to make Hermione do it again for the millionth time.

Bellatrix found her old cell phone and texted her sister, Narcissa, asking if her and her other sister, Andromeda could come and sit with her. She told her everything that had happened. Narcissa knew about Hermione and Neville being kidnapped, and Bellatrix being in Azkaban again, but she didn't know that Hermione had been raped by Fenrir Greyback. Bellatrix angrily told her about the bruises she found, too. Narcissa said she would get a hold of Andromeda and come be with her.

After ten minutes of pacing the suite, the door was knocked upon and Bellatrix answered it just a tiny bit relieve to see both her sisters outside. She let them in and they sat down on the couch with her.

"Where's Hermione," Narcissa asked quietly.

"Taking a bath," Bellatrix shrugged in the bathroom's direction.

"That poor little love," Andromeda sighed, "I'm surprised he didn't bite her."

"She's a muggle born," Bellatrix mumbled, "He wouldn't want to disease himself with her blood."

Andromeda smiled at Bellatrix for the first time in years. Bellatrix caught her staring, "What?"

"You remind me of myself when Ted was around."

Bellatrix rolled her eyes, "Yes, I suppose… Well, alright, it's basically the same situation."

"Basically," Andromeda laughed, "It is, silly!"

They heard the door to the bathroom open. Hermione walked out in new pajamas stunned to see all three Black sisters in the living room; and although she knew none of them would harm her anymore, she still felt the sense of panic rising inside her and she started to tremble. A tear fell from her eyes.

"What's wrong," Bellatrix asked very concerned as she got up to go to her. She felt her and could see the panic in her eyes as Hermione shifted her eyes back and forth to Bellatrix and her sisters.

Bellatrix looked back at them and then back at Hermione and gently pulled her towards her, "Don't be ridiculous!" Bellatrix more gasped than shouted. "You know you are safe with us."

"Yes, Hermione, what have I ever done to make you be afraid of me," Andromeda smiled warmly as she got up to greet Hermione.

Hermione forced a smile onto her face, "All this attention; I think I'll go back into the room and lie down some more."

After Hermione left them and went back into the bedroom, Bellatrix and Andromeda walked back over to the couch to see an upset Narcissa. If it wasn't one person, it was another.

Bellatrix sighed, "What's wrong with you?"

"Bella!" Andromeda scowled at her, "Just because she's not Hermione doesn't mean you can't show some sympathy."

Bellatrix rolled her eyes a little and folded her arms. She looked over at her youngest sister upset on the couch and gave in. She sighed and sat down next to her hesitantly putting a hand on her backside.

"It'll take ages for her to ever trust me, if she ever does," Narcissa whispered.

"But you haven't done anything to her," Andromeda cut in.

"I allowed things to happen.. I walked away and left her alone; I did that a lot with people. I should've stood up for her, I should've stood up against _you_." Narcissa turned towards Bellatrix, but quickly turned away, "I'm sorry… I shouldn't blame you."

"Why not," Bellatrix got very defensive, "Everyone else blames me…for practically everything!"

"Okay, enough blaming," Andromeda got up and looked at them like they were her two daughters. Everyone also mistaked Andromeda for being the eldest of the three Black sisters. "Enough blaming yourselves and each other. It does no good. Hermione needs our support right now. _Bellatrix_ needs our support right now. We all need to support each other, and fighting won't help. Bellatrix, screaming, killing, torturing, and ruining things won't make things better for Hermione, or yourself. Narcissa, you can't change the past, so just make sure your present and future are different from it."

Hermione was in the bedroom lying down with her eyes open listening to their conversation. She felt scared. She wanted her friends around her, she wanted to be around the Weasley's, they always made her feel safe. She knew Bellatrix would never let anything bad happen to her as long as she was around, but she still felt odd being in the same vicinity as all Black sisters, even if one of them never once thought about going the route as the other two. Whenever bad things happened around her while she was at Hogwarts, she always had someone to fall back on, and that was usually Ginny. But Ginny wasn't there. She closed her eyes shut and prayed to whatever god there was in the world that for once, she could go a year without anything horribly fucked up happening to her or anyone around her. She opened her eyes and jumped a little when she heard Bellatrix's booming voice from the other room.

"What do you know?!" Bellatrix got up off the couch and got in Andromeda's face, "You left us! You don't even have a clue about what our lives have been for the past thirty years!"

"I don't have to _be_ within a hundred feet to know what you've been up to!" Andromeda yelled back at her.

"Don't argue with her, Andy, it just makes her worse," Narcissa pleaded.

"Oh, makes me worse? Makes _me_ worse?" Bellatrix turned back to Andromeda, "You have no right to judge when you have no idea the things I was put through and had to do.."

"What you _had_ to do? You just _had_ to torture and kill innocent people. You _just_ had to hurt a poor defenseless girl, a girl who is giving you a second chance, being put through hell because of it, and _still_ stands by your side! And you're still going to try and find an excuse for the things you've done?!"

"STOP BLAMING ME! STOP!"

You could hear a pin drop in the room before Bellatrix began again with a tremble in her voice and tears threatening to spill from her eyes, "I know the things I did were wrong. I know I hurt and killed innocent people. I know I destroyed lives. I know Hermione's probably better off without me. So you don't have to say it to me. Okay, I'm a horrible person, I know that! Just…just….ergh! Just stop lecturing me about it!"

"You're not a horrible person, Bella," Narcissa looked up at her, the only one out of all three sisters allowing tears to spill from her eyes, "You just made a lot of bad choices, but we're all capable of doing that. Andy's right, it's all in the past, now let's try to make the present and future very unlike it."

Bellatrix scrunched up her face and sniffed still trying to keep the tears in her eyes. She folded her arms and turned around with her back to both sisters. Andromeda slowly approached her. She stood very close to Bellatrix's back and put her hands on her shoulders, "I'm sorry," she said softly, "I'm sorry that I keep bringing it up. I really am. I just want everything to be better."

"It's not ever going to get better because there are still horrible people in the world," Bellatrix said without moving, "There is still Fenrir Greyback out there, lurking around waiting for someone to leave Hermione alone and vulnerable again."

"But there are good people, too. You shouldn't think so negative."

"Why? It keeps me on my toes. It keeps me alert."

"I know you've heard this, and you probably don't care, but violence is not the answer. Two wrongs don't make a right."

"One wrong and one right doesn't make a bloody right either because the person who was hurt still has that in their memories."

"Same goes with two wrongs. Killing Fenrir Greyback won't erase Hermione's memories. And you know Hermione would agree with me."

Bellatrix huffed, "She would. She's such a goody two shoes."

Andromeda rubbed her back and hugged her, "Come on, just calm down now, that's what we came over for, right, to help calm you down?"

"I'm not too sure it worked," Narcissa said in the background.

Bellatrix finally let her muscles loose and turned around, "You did make me feel better. Thank you for coming, both of you, and I'm sorry it got a little out of hand."

"Oh, my, did I just hear you say you were sorry to me?" Andromeda put her hand to her ear.

"I put I was sorry in that letter I sent you!"

"Yes, but it's one thing to write it, but to hear the infamous Bellatrix Lestrange apologize, and sincerely!"

"Don't call me Lestrange!"

The two sisters left short after their ended conversation. Bellatrix was a bit more calm, but still worried about Hermione. She opened the door and walked in to check on her. She saw Hermione lying on her side with her back towards the door. She saw her eyes were open when she walked around and kneeled in front of her placing a hand on her arm.

"You were yelling about me?" Hermione said as if she was one of Bellatrix's distraught children listening to their parents fight in the middle of the night.

"No, not yelling about you… We're just frustrated. I'm frustrated, with everything, and I'm still learning how to deal with all my negative emotions in a way that doesn't hurt myself, you, or anyone else."

"I'm sorry I panicked when I came out of the bathroom. I just felt…I don't know… I miss my friends."

"You can go see them if you'd like," Bellatrix held her eyes locked onto Hermione's, "You don't have to sit here and babysit me."

"But I don't want you to have to go back to Azkaban just for that!"

"Why care anymore? They've already done the worst. You really think I could get any worse than I am now?"

"I think you have been. You're so much better than the Bellatrix Lestrange I remember. You have so much potential, you just don't see it."

"I guess it'll take a lot of work to get through the self-esteem issues."

"Oh Bella," Hermione lifted a hand and put it on Bellatrix's cheek, "You need to forgive yourself."

"No," Bellatrix looked away and shook her head.

"Why? What do you mean 'no?'"

"It'll never happen, not fully. And besides, I don't know how. I don't know where to start. And I know you say I've gotten so much better, but have I really? I've been cooped up in this suite; who knows what I might do, or how different I may act when I'm outside and free again?"

"You need to take risks, you need to be brave…please try, for me?"

"I'm scared, I'm scared you'll leave me, because of something horrible I'll do or say."

"You could kill me, and my ghost would still love you. Somehow, you got cemented in my heart."

"How? Why me? _How_ me?"

Hermione just smiled and scooted over to the other side of the bed pulling Bellatrix in with her. She wrapped her arms around her and kissed her fully before nuzzling into her to fall asleep again. Bellatrix kept her eyes open as she held Hermione. Her mind was racing, and Hermione must have sensed it because she lifted her head after a minute, "It's okay to cry." Bellatrix's eyes were shifting around the room still filled to the brim with tears. Hermione got her to lock eyes with her for a moment, "Have I ever told you that I love you more than life itself?" Hermione knew her statement would make Bellatrix go overboard. She hid her face in Hermione's chest and sobbed over nothing and everything for a few minutes before calming back down to her normal self.

"What do you want to do," Bellatrix asked still sniffing up tears.

"I don't want to be here anymore," Hermione answered, "I don't want to be in a castle that seems deserted."

"Can we go somewhere else? Would both of us be able to move to a new place closer to your friends?"

"I don't know. I guess we can ask, it wouldn't hurt."

Hermione walked with Bellatrix to Professor McGonagall's office. The castle was so deserted the staircases didn't even move. The whole of Hogwarts seemed so small. Professor McGonagall told them they would have to wait until they could all have a meeting with Kingsley, which wouldn't be for another few days. They would have to manage being two of the few residents at Hogwarts for now.

They went outside to get some fresh air and Bellatrix pointed out to a particular area near the Forbidden Forest, "That's where I first heard of Tom and his Death Eaters."

"Did you get the Dark Mark there?" Hermione asked curiously, "I mean, were you still here when you fully joined him?"

"No, I waited until after I was done with my seventh year."

"What did you parents think about it?"

"They didn't know much about it. As long as I was mingling with purebloods, they were happy; and I was already set to marry Rodolphus."

"Would they disown you, like they did with Andromeda, if they knew you were hanging around with me?"

"Back then, yes. These days, I'm not sure. Everyone seems to be changing their mind about everything. It's a new era."

"A new beginning."

"It sounds so corny, but… thank you for welcoming me into it."

Hermione smiled at her and Bellatrix smirked back before turning her head back towards the forest, "You wouldn't want to go have some fun in there, would you?"

"No, there's a reason it's called the Forbidden Forrest. Besides, I've already been in there a few times already and it's not anything special."

"Oh really? When did _you_ go in there?"

"First year, Ron, Harry, and I got caught visiting Hagrid after dark, so we had detention. Draco was with us. We all went into the forest to help with the dying unicorns. And then Harry and I traipsed through the forest in our third year trying to save Sirius from the dementors. Then fifth year when we met Hagrid's half brother, Grawp, who I talked about in the blog. We also ditched Dolores Umbridge in there."

"Are you sure you're a Gryffindor?" Bellatrix continued to smirk at her.

"One hundred percent," Hermione smiled proudly. "If all you want is fun, we can go back to the room and have some."

"Yeah, and what's your idea of fun," Bellatrix followed Hermione back inside, "Memorizing a large book from front to back?"

"That's very fun, but I'm sure we can think of something else."

Hermione ran up the stairs to their room glancing back to make sure Bellatrix was chasing her and not taking her own route. When they got to the room and Bellatrix caught her, Hermione gasped again at the contact on her bruises.

"How did you get them," Bellatrix asked holding her gently.

"I was with Fenrir," Hermione answered emotionless and walked away into the kitchen, "Are you hungry?"

"Sure," Bellatrix slowly walked over to the window wishing Hermione would elaborate, but at the same time thankful that she didn't. Their room faced the edge of the Forbidden Forest where they walked along earlier. She used to meet with other Slytherins in there all the time. She would recognize the sign of a Death Eater's dark red eyes glowing.

She looked closely out the window and skimmed the edge looking for nothing in particular. After a few minutes, she blinked a couple times and shook her head when she saw a pair of dark red glowing eyes. Was it her imagination? She opened her eyes again and saw the eyes move as the person she least wanted to see stepped out into the open: Fenrir Greyback.


	28. Chapter 28

**Hey, I'm finally done with my first semester of student teaching and IT WAS AWESOME! But I'm really going to miss the kids. I am student teaching starting in January with first and second graders who are in a special education class. **

**You know how life is, family and friends and problems and stuff gets in the way, and when I finally get a weekend or a week to do whatever the hell I want, well I can't.**

**But now I can!**

**I am extremely grateful for all of you; everyone that has favorited this story, followed, reviewed, and to the awesome people sending me messages.**

**Thank you Science Monkey for being super interested in the kind of special education I am going into, and I promise I will get back to you very soon, if not already.**

**Kigo Stories, you are awesome! Thanks for letting me know you care about me and this story. A few kind words do go a very long way.**

**So here's another chapter, and hopefully I'll be able to get to 30 chapters before starting next semester.**

**Enjoy! **

"He's here," Bellatrix said.

"What," Hermione asked from the kitchen oblivious.

"Greyback, that bastard, he's here, and I'm going to kill him!"

Hermione quickly walked over to the window and looked out, "Where?"

"He was there, on the edge of the forest," Bellatrix frantically pointed out the window.

"I don't see him. Are you sure you're not just going mad?" Hermione laughed nervously and walked back into the kitchen.

"I'm not going mad!" Bellatrix turned and looked at Hermione, "You need to leave."

The door was banged upon just then, and opened quickly. Professor McGonagall approached, "There is an intruder on the grounds. We need to move you two quickly."

Hermione quickly gathered all important things she thought her and Bellatrix needed and put them in here enchanted purse. Professor McGonagall grabbed both their arms and apparated with them to number 12 Grimmauld place, past headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix.

"I told you I saw Greyback," Bellatrix said to Hermione the second they got there.

"Everything you're used to at the room at Hogwarts have followed you here; Ms. Granger will know if and when you are telling a lie, and that goes for wherever you are, not just in this building, from now on. The Order has put extra security measures on this building," Professor McGonagall said ignoring Bellatrix, "Only members of the order can apparate inside the building. I forbid you both to leave this building at all. The only way you would be able to do that is to apparate anyways, and I know Hermione knows how to follow the rules."

"Oh, great," Bellatrix started, "So I'm stuck in another room, and can't go outside again. I feel like a fucking ten year old in trouble."

"You've visited this place many times Ms. Black. Now stop fussing, I have a lot of work to do and I need to get back." And with that, Professor McGonagall apparated and left them with unanswered questions.

"This is actually Harry's place," Hermione said matter-of-factly.

"..What?"

"After you k-…Sirius died, Harry inherited this house."

Bellatrix turned her back towards Hermione and shrugged, "Whatever." She started walking around, and up the stairs while Hermione followed, "I wonder if that blasted elf is still here. I know my dear aunt Walburga will be screaming every time _you_ pass by."

"Don't worry, I'm used to her."

"Used to her," Bellatrix stopped and turned around.

"I've been here before," Hermione laughed a little. "Loads of times."

Hermione continued talking while she followed Bellatrix up more stairs, "Did you grow up here?"

"Well I didn't necessarily live here, but my parents, sisters, and I would drop by a few times a month…So I guess in a way….yes, I kind of grew up here. And it was way before Sirius' time; remember he was 8 years younger than me."

"I know we tried talking about it before, but..what was your relationship with Sirius like," Hermione boldly asked.

"YOU FILTHY BLOOD TRAITOR, BELLATRIX BLACK, YOU GET OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW!" Walburga Black's portrait screamed as they walked by.

"Oh stuff it, Aunt Walburga," Bellatrix pulled Hermione past the portrait and up the stairs with her. "I guess my relationship with Sirius was fine until I met Rodolphus. A lot changed when he came into my life.."

"Sirius didn't like Rodolphus?" Hermione asked as they entered a room labeled R.A.B.

"No, Sirius was definitely the black sheep of the family. His younger brother, Regulus… This was his bedroom. He decided to join Voldemort, but soon backed out from fear. He was killed shortly after at the age of 18. I think in the back of my mind, his death was one of the many reasons I stuck with Voldemort to the very end.. out of fear. Nothing and no one could harm me more than him; so I did the best I could to stay alive, out of selfishness."

"Once, when I was here, I saw Harry talking to Sirius in a room with a bunch of pictures on the wall," Hermione said, "I didn't want to intrude more than I already had. Will you show me the room?"

Bellatrix turned around and looked at her, "Very well." She walked ahead of Hermione grabbing her hand and pulling her back down the stairs past the screaming portrait and into the room with the Black family tree on the walls.

"Our family tree," Bellatrix stopped and let go of Hermione's hand, feeling the pictures and faces on the wall. "Sirius, of course, is burned away. Ah…and look here! I'm burned away now, too." Bellatrix put her hand where her face used to be and smiled at Hermione. Hermione looked guiltily back at her, but she didn't know why. She should be happy, but she felt guilty for taking Bellatrix away from her family.

"Oh, don't feel bad, love," Bellatrix walked over and hugged her tightly. "I wouldn't change any of it."

"MUDBLOOD! THERE'S A MUDBLOOD IN _MY_ HOUSE!" they heard her aunt's portrait scream. Bellatrix rolled her eyes from annoyance and held Hermione closer.

For the next whole week, Hermione and Bellatrix weren't alone at number twelve Grimmauld. Harry had come by and started to clean out all the rooms starting from the top floor. He came alone and worked along with Hermione while Bellatrix stay cooped up in a random bedroom on the bottom floor. By the end of the week, Harry started bringing over Ron and Ginny to help them, and that had helped convince Bellatrix to come out from hiding. She wasn't too keen on actually going through any of her old relatives' things, but she did socialize with Ginny, and Hermione when she wasn't too busy stuffing her nose in an old book she'd found.

When Harry, Ron, and Ginny left one night, Bellatrix stomped into the room where Hermione was and sighed. When Hermione had not looked up from whatever she was reading, Bellatrix sighed obnoxiously louder. Hermione slammed the book shut and turned around, "Can I help you?"

"When are we going to leave this place?" Bellatrix demanded, "I'm tired of staying inside all day."

"Whenever Professor McGonagall or someone else from the Order says it's alright," Hermione answered, "Don't think I'm having a jolly time staying in this dusty, old house."

"Well if I had my wand, we could easily clean this house together in no time."

"Even if you did have your wand, it's Harry's house, and it's up to him how he wants it clean."

"DIRTY HOUSE, FULL OF MUDBLOOD WHORES AND BLOOD TRAITING FILTH!" they both heard Bellatrix's aunt's portrait scream.

Hermione shook her head and set the book down before going to walk out of the room. Bellatrix held out her hand and stopped her leaving; she sighed as she pulled her closer and wrapped her arms around her, "Are you happy?"

Hermione rested her head on Bellatrix's shoulder and looked at her, giving her a small smile.

"You don't have to pretend," Bellatrix said softly to her, "I know my being around doesn't make things easy."

"It doesn't make it hard, either," Hermione said pulling away a little and holding her hands. "It's not you that's making my mood keep at a low level."

"But there's nothing I can do to increase it even a little."

Hermione sighed, and then smiled, mentally telling herself to lighten up, at least for Bellatrix's sake, "You definitely increase my mood. Otherwise, why would you still be around?"

"I don't know, maybe they're paying you, and I just don't know it."

"Yeah, right. That would never happen. I'm like an elf, lower than a mudblood. Or are mudbloods lower than elves?"

"Don't use that word, Hermione, it offends me."

"What? Elves?"

"No! You know what I mean!"

Hermione giggled and leaned back into her, "Oh, my Bella. It will be less boring soon. Just be patient. What would you even do if you were allowed to go outside?"

Bellatrix didn't answer.

"Is it just the fact that you're not allowed to? You probably wouldn't even go outside if you could."

"Why should I? I should be able to at my own will, if I wanted."

"But you and I both can't, and this time, it's not just because of you and your past, it's for both our safety."

"Well, mostly your safety. I would kill anyone right on the spot, with or without my wand."

"What makes you think I wouldn't?"

"You have no mean bone in your body."

"Neville thought the same thing about himself."

"That was different. Neville did it to save you, not to save himself."

"Whatever. I found some old pictures of your family earlier today," Hermione walked over to a box and picked up a large book.

"Oh. The family album. That's nothing interesting."

"_I _think it's interesting," Hermione said bringing it back over to Bellatrix.

"You would. You think every little thing is interesting. You think _I'm_ interesting."

"You _are_ interesting; Bellatrix _Black_," Hermione made Bellatrix giggle by giving her an Eskimo kiss.

"Alright, if you say so," Bellatrix picked Hermione up and carried her outside the room, "Let's go into one of the rooms that has a bed we can sit on, and then we'll look this over."

As Bellatrix carried Hermione down to the first floor, they could hear Walburga Black's portrait screaming as usual. But in between screams, she suddenly stopped. Hermione jumped out of Bellatrix's arms and handed her the family album, looking over the railing down at the portrait.

For the first time since Bellatrix and Hermione arrived, Kreacher came out of hiding. "Kreacher put a silencing charm on mistress' portrait," the old house elf said looking up at Hermione, "Miss Hermione is the only kindness Kreacher knows." Kreacher walked away into the kitchen while he said this.

"Well, at least we don't have to listen to her anymore," Hermione sighed, and then turned to look at Bellatrix who had a stunned look on her face, "What?"

"He was _nice_ to you," Bellatrix exclaimed pointing her finger, "But surely he knows you're a….a…"

"That's because I was nice to him," Hermione laughed and grabbed Bellatrix's hand leading her into one of the bedrooms, "Now come on."

Bellatrix talked for three hours while Hermione continually listened. Hermione remembered every name Bellatrix said to her, "You have a large family. And you haven't even met everyone! How do you remember all of them?"

"How do _you_ remember all of them? They're not even your family!"

"I have good retention skills."

"Well, everyone knows that." Bellatrix got off the bed and walked out of the room to put the album away. When she came back, Hermione was sleeping on the bed and she quietly closed the door and walked into the kitchen.

Hermione had gotten her a new phone, and once she sat down, it received its first text message from an unknown number.

"Hogwarts. 23:00. 12-07."

Bellatrix didn't understand. Well, she understood whoever this was wanted her to meet them at Hogwarts at 11 P.M. on July 12. That was the coming Sunday.

"Who are you?" Bellatrix texted back.

"You know who I am," the person texted back, and then sent a second message, "I saw you in the window a week ago." A third message was sent, "Taking care of the dirty mudblood I got to play with. Is she still fun for you? If not , I will take her off your hands."

_Do they seriously still think I am on their side? Can I use this to my advantage? Hermione would not approve of me going double agent like Snape and sneaking into Hogwarts to deal with these idiots. I don't even have a wand…I could use Hermione's…but she still would be upset with me….But I must get revenge! For her!_

"I will meet you there July 12," Bellatrix sent back.

"Be sure to bring the little girl for me."

Bellatrix didn't answer. She was _definitely_ not taking Hermione with her, especially because she wasn't even going to tell Hermione about what was even going on. She would have to come up with a plan. She knew she had no kind of potion to give Hermione. She couldn't lie to her because of the whole green face thing and even if that didn't exist, eventually, she was going to find her out. And even though she knew she was risking Hermione's trust and faith in her, even though she knew this might really change their relationship for the worse, she felt the burning need to take action; action, that for once, was the right kind, and for the right side.

She decided that she would wait until Sunday night when Hermione fell asleep, and would take her wand and apparate into Hogsmeade. Once there, she would find him. She would find the man that so hurt the woman she now cared for and loved with all her heart. She would find him, and she would kill him.


	29. Chapter 29

**I fucked up again. Oh woe is me. Good thing this is just fan fiction. **

**So the date that Bellatrix is supposedly going to Hogwarts is July 12, Sunday. But Hermione and Bellatrix arrived at 12 Grimmauld Place on July 9, and then they were there for a week with Harry and company coming over. So the correct day that Bellatrix SHOULD be going to Hogwarts is July 19, and that's still a Sunday.**

**Sigh.**

A few hours later, after Bellatrix was done pacing the entire building, she walked back into the room she left Hermione in. Hermione rolled over with her eyes open. She smiled at Bellatrix and closed them again. Bellatrix lay down next to her staring at the ceiling, feeling very much like her old self. She knew exactly where Fenrir Greyback would be, and when. She had him right where she wanted him. She felt like her hatred for him outweighed her love for the young muggle-born lying next to her, snuggling closer and closer. She felt horrible; at the same time, almost excited about getting to kill again.

Hermione sprawled an arm around Bellatrix to hold her closer, but felt how tense she was. She opened her eyes to see Bellatrix staring at the ceiling. She sat up and continued to stare at her as Bellatrix made no move.

"Bella," Hermione whispered, "Everything alright? …Bellatrix?"

Hermione put her hand on Bellatrix's cheek and pulled her towards her to look her in the eyes. The old death eater that had risen had suddenly died down, and Bellatrix felt a huge pang of guiltiness wash over her. Hermione could see the change of expression in her face, "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

Bellatrix gasped and grabbed Hermione, burying her head in her chest and trying so hard not to cry, but she knew Hermione could hear her small whimpers.

"Tell me, what's wrong," Hermione said with concern, rubbing her back, "What happened while I was sleeping?"

"Just…"

Hermione pulled away to look at her, "Just what?"

Bellatrix didn't want to lie, so she quickly came up with something to tell Hermione that was actually true, "Just feel like I'm slipping back into my old mad self."

"Well," Hermione wasn't sure what to say to her, "Do you know why you're feeling like that? Is there…anything in particular I can do to help?"

"No," Bellatrix quickly said with tears falling down her cheeks.

"Do you want me to leave you alone?"

Bellatrix shifted her eyes, and then suddenly sat up and held her knees to her chest. She felt herself losing control.

"Okay, Bella, seriously," Hermione sat forward with her, "Tell me what's going on."

Bellatrix made an angry grunting noise and got up off the bed and started stomping around the room. "I hate my life!"

Hermione felt stupid, but she didn't know what to say but, "Why?"

"Because everything I do is wrong, even if I'm trying to something _right_!"

"What's wrong that you're trying to do right?"

"Urgh, if I tell you, then I'll be in trouble, but then I just fucking gave myself away!"

Hermione sighed, "Okay, let's stop beating around the bush, just tell me what's going on. And Bellatrix, remember, I _won't_ leave you, no matter what happens or what you say. I'm always going to love you and try to help you the best I can, okay?"

Bellatrix sighed back, "You're not going to like this, because I'm _not_ changing my mind, and there's nothing you can do to stop me." Bellatrix pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and opened the conversation she had earlier with Fenrir Greyback. She gave Hermione the phone to read it.

After a minute, Bellatrix spoke up, "You're not coming with me. I'm going alone. I'm going alone, and I'm going to end him."

Hermione shut the phone with an angry look on her face and shook her head, "I'm not letting you go anywhere, especially without me. You can't apparate without a wand, and like hell I'm going to let you use mine anymore."

"But see, you're scolding me, even when I'm trying to do good!"

"I'm not scolding you, I'm just telling you it's not safe, and killing doesn't always make things right! In fact it makes nothing right!"

Bellatrix huffed, "You sound just like my sisters."

"Good. At least I know a few Black sisters are on my side."

"But I'm on your side, too! I just do things in different ways!"

"Bellatrix, I understand you're trying to help. I understand that now you're actually on _our_ side and trying to prevent anything bad from happening to me. I get that, and I sincerely appreciate it, I really do, but you have to understand that I'm just as protective towards you as you are towards me, and I'm the one in charge right now, so come back over here and sit with me, and calm down."

In the back of her mind, Bellatrix knew she was still going, and she was going to have to trick Hermione into giving her wand to her. She walked over to the bed and sat down next to her, not looking at her, like a child in trouble.

Hermione got up and sat behind Bellatrix and started massaging her shoulders. "You're way too tense, love," Hermione whispered in her ear and kissed her cheek.

"Of course I am," Bellatrix closed her eyes and smirked, "I'm Bellatrix Lestrange."

Hermione stopped for a second, "You mean Bellatrix Black?"

Bellatrix opened her eyes and stared forward without saying anything.

Hermione, finally worried that Bellatrix really was slowly turning back into her old self, climbed on top of Bellatrix's lap and held her face in her hands, "Please stay with me, I love you so much. I don't want you to go back to that lifestyle. I know it makes you miserable."

"I thought you said you'd love me no matter what though," Bellatrix said in a sickly innocent voice that made Hermione's stomach turn.

"I will," Hermione held back her fear, "I mean, I do. I do love you. And I know you love me, right?" Hermione knew she had to pull back Bellatrix Black and shove off Bellatrix Lestrange. She couldn't let her take charge.

"I'm going to kill him; for you. Does that not say I love you?"

"Bella," Hermione tried to make sure she wasn't tensing up, and in turn rubbed Bellatrix's back with one hand and used her thumb to rub against her cheek with her other hand, "You need to learn that murder is wrong."

"I KNOW IT'S FUCKING WRONG!" Bellatrix shrieked into Hermione's face. She stood up and threw Hermione back down onto the bed, "BUT IT'S ALL I FUCKING KNOW!"

Hermione slowly scooted back away from Bellatrix as she started pacing the room. "My whole life, I've been fighting, and though it was for the wrong side, now I want to fight for the right side, and I can't even do that! You just don't trust me!"

"I do trust you, Bella, I do!" Hermione cried trying to hold back her tears, but was failing at the moment, "I'm just scared for you, and I know the other people out there don't trust you, and they don't all truly believe you're on our side now, and they might hurt you!"

"Fuck 'em. That's what I say: Fuck 'em. I can take care of myself! And I don't need _you_ or anyone else to watch over and babysit me!"

Hermione felt hurt by what Bellatrix just said, even though she knew she hadn't said it to hurt her. Bellatrix saw the pain in her face as the light from the moon shone upon it. A well of guiltiness poured over her once more, and she stomped towards on the walls and punched it with a loud and angry grunt.

This was the first time since Hermione approached Bellatrix after Voldemort died that she actually felt scared of Bellatrix, like really scared for her life. She closed her eyes and counted to ten, and then made the decision to stop acting like a baby and to be brave for Bellatrix. Although at the moment Bellatrix was almost off the deep end, Hermione knew she still needed her love and support.

She slowly got up off the bed and walked over to the corner of the bedroom where Bellatrix was standing, her hands against the wall holding her up.

"Bella?"

"What?"

"I…I'm sorry."

"For what?"

Getting extremely sick and tired of Bellatrix's tone of voice, Hermione sighed and mumbled, "I don't know anymore."

"Speak clearly, little love," Bellatrix said in another mocking tone.

"I said I don't know anymore! Well, I'm sorry that I'm human and that I can't always be 'oh it's okay, Bella, oh poor Bella,' because I have feelings, too, and I think you just need a time out!"

Bellatrix turned around and laughed, "A time out? Is that the best you can do, _muddy_?"

The nickname had now pushed Hermione over the edge and she almost lost, and almost even wanted to lose it, but didn't do her worst, instead she whipped out her wand and swished it around making the window disappear so it would be completely dark once the door was shut. She also destroyed anything electrical that could produce light.

She pointed her wand at Bellatrix and stood in the doorway, "Go to bed. I don't want to see or hear from you for the rest of the night." Hermione slammed the door shut and used a spell to lock it.

"LET ME OUT OF HERE!" she heard Bellatrix scream and walk over to bang on the door. "Hermione, I'm sorry! Please let me out, or at least give me some god damn light! Please!"

"I'm putting a silencing charm on the room so I won't hear you. Just…go to sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

She felt a tad bit guilty after putting the silencing charm on the room. She knew Bellatrix was going to go crazy being left alone in the dark, just like she was in Azkaban, but Hermione did that on purpose. She felt that maybe she had gone too far, but she didn't know what else to do. She wasn't taking any chances to let herself get hurt by Bellatrix. She knew she could end this whole thing with Bellatrix any second, and she would be sent back to Azkaban, and then she'd have something to cry about. But she didn't, because she loved Bellatrix, and she knew that Bellatrix loved her. She was just having a hard night, and she needed to be left alone.

As she laid in bed in another room away from Bellatrix, she stared at the ceiling and wondered if maybe she should let Bellatrix go to Hogwarts. She knew she would be breaking the rules allowing that, but maybe this could be a test. She knew Bellatrix would pass it. Bellatrix had been very good, especially for her, most of the time they had been together. If there was ever a problem, it wasn't Bellatrix's fault to begin with. And sure, Bellatrix needs to learn to react properly to certain situations, but maybe if she allowed Bellatrix to go, she would believe in herself that she had changed. Right now, she says she wants to kill Fenrir Greyback, and maybe she will. But will she be okay with it afterwards? Hermione was going to take a risk and allow Bellatrix to go to Hogwarts, but she wasn't going to let Bellatrix know this. She knew that no matter what she said, Bellatrix was planning on going behind her back to steal her wand on Sunday night anyways.

Hermione did give in after three hours, and finally went back downstairs to the room she left Bellatrix in. She undid the silencing charm and heard nothing. She unlocked the door and opened it fixing the lights and turning them on. She found Bellatrix curled up like a dog on the floor in front of the door. Bellatrix put her head up and revealed her tear-stained face when Hermione knelt down next to her.

Bellatrix started sobbing again, "I'm sorry! I'm a horrible person!"

"No, you're not a horrible person!" Hermione helped her up and walked her to the bed and helped her in. She got in beside her and held her, "You're just mixed up right now."

"What am I going to do?" Bellatrix continued to cry.

"Nothing. We're just going to go back to sleep okay? Shhh, it'll be okay. It's okay, I'm right here with you, I'm not leaving again tonight."

"Do you still love me?" Bellatrix held onto Hermione close and tight.

"Of course I still love you! I told you I always will!"

"I'm sorry, Hermione, I'm really sorry!"

"Shhh, shhh shh shhhh," Hermione bent down and kissed her lips tasting blood. She thought Bellatrix must've been biting her lips earlier, "It's okay, we're just going to go back to sleep now, okay? Everything's okay."

They fell back to sleep in each other's arms and didn't wake until very late the next day. Hermione knew that in 24 hours, Bellatrix would be planning to steal her wand and go to Hogwarts. Ginny asked to come over Sunday evening, and Hermione just had a brilliant idea. Hermione knew her plan to help Bellatrix (without her knowing it) would make her suffer the consequences, but hopefully Bellatrix wouldn't end up back in Azkaban. She and Ginny planned very carefully to make the whole thing work without Bellatrix even knowing. When the plan was set, Hermione put her phone in her pocket and walked into the kitchen to start making dinner only to find Bellatrix had it already made.

"Thought I'd give you a break and try it out," Bellatrix said blushing a little.

"Aw, you didn't have to do this," Hermione sat down at the table and Bellatrix came around to sit next to her.

"Yes, I did," she put an arm around her and hugged her, "There's a hell of a lot I need to do to make things up to you."

Hermione turned more towards her wrapping her arms around neck to pull her closer.

Bellatrix couldn't even fully enjoy Hermione's kiss.

She knew she would always have to make something up to Hermione, especially after tomorrow night.


	30. Chapter 30

**I have two and a half snow days in a row (third day no student teaching, but I still had to go to the university)! In southeast Michigan, we got a boat load of snow last night, and tonight it's supposed to be severely freezing with high wind chills, so we can't let the kiddies go to school in that. I was supposed to start my special education student teaching, but it didn't happen until Thursday.**

**Right now I am currently re-reading my story. There are so many stupid errors. Like when Bellatrix fixes her teeth, but she doesn't have her wand. We'll just say Hermione forgot her wand that day, or night, or whenever it happened. And how Bellatrix so quickly loved up to Hermione (though she is very easy to love). Sigh. I don't have an editor, and I'm too lazy to re-read. Even though I re-read the one chapter and still fucked up with the dates. Let's continue making more errors, shall we?**

The next day, Ginny, Draco, and Harry apparated to 12 Grimmauld Place to spend the evening with Hermione and Bellatrix. Draco, again, brought more Fire Whiskey over and was determined to get his aunt to drink some.

"Get your disgusting, smelly bottle away from me before I smack that stupid grin off your face," Bellatrix shoved Draco away. She was still on edge from the previous few days, and Hermione had dealt with her in a calm, but firm manner. She hadn't used her wand for over 24 hours, and had it hidden somewhere in the large house. Later, she would play a "game" with Bellatrix to see if she could find the wand. Hermione needed to be selfish and irresponsible for a night, and decided to get drunk with her friends.

"You're all just a bunch of fucking..bloody alcoholics," Bellatrix spat at them as she sat across the kitchen table.

"Come on, Bella," laughed Ginny, "Why don't you drink? Why are you so against it?"

"I am completely against making a fool of myself."

"But it's so much fun, isn't it, Hermione?"

Hermione, feeling like she should probably quit now before she gets too drunk and blacks out, smirked over at Bellatrix blowing her a kiss.

Bellatrix gave her hard scowl before getting up and leaving the room.

"Wait, where are you going?" Hermione turned around and watched her leave.

"For your information," Bellatrix came back and peeked into the room, "I'm going to make sure there are clean towels and sheets for when you wake up later and vomit all over the place."

"You know you can just use your wand to clean up the mess?"

"Oh, that would be nice, dear, except I don't have my wand, and I know you've hidden yours. I'll be going now."

"Aren't you supposed to go looking for it?" Hermione shouted, but Bellatrix did not respond.

"You should probably go after her," Ginny said, "And I don't think I'm sober enough, and I don't think they're sober enough to apparate us back, so I'm just going to text Ron."

Ron apparated to 12 Grimmauld Place and took Harry and Draco back to their homes. When he came back to get Ginny, he couldn't find her.

"Where's Ginny," Ron asked Hermione who was sitting alone at the kitchen table finishing her last glass of Fire Whiskey.

"She went off to bother Bellatrix. Come sit with me."

Ron sat down next to her and Hermione put her arm around him hugging him close, "I miss you, Ronald."

Ron turned his head away from her, "Please, don't do this."

"Do what?" she put her head on his shoulder.

"Don't make me feel like I might have a chance with you, when I know I don't."

"Who says you don't?"

"Hermione…I know you love Bellatrix, you shouldn't say things like that."

"Yes, you really shan't if you sincerely cared about the person you're supposedly in love with," Bellatrix said standing in the door way with Ginny.

Hermione quickly stood up, "I didn't mean anything from it, Bella, I'm just drunk," she walked over and held her arms out to Bellatrix, but Bellatrix turned away and went back to sulking around the house.

"But, but," Hermione still had her arms held out and Ginny walked into them hugging Hermione before Ron apparated with her.

Hermione started walking up the stairs calling out, "Bellllllaaaa….trix!" over and over until she found her in one of the rooms looking at her phone. "What're you doing? Can't find me wand?"

"Obviously," Bellatrix set her phone down and turned towards Hermione.

"You really don't _need_ to go, Bellatrix," Hermione said to her, "I mean, I agree that rapists should pay, but Fenrir didn't even really rape me. I mean he did, but.."

Bellatrix put her hands to her ears and started shaking a little. Hermione walked over to her and grabbed her hands off.

"See this is one reason it's good to drink because now I can talk about these things. He didn't rape me in my vagina, he only raped me in my anus. It wasn't that bad…"

_It wasn't that bad_.

Bellatrix started whimpering and remembered when her father always said that to her… _"It wasn't that bad, was it? Stop your crying before you wake your mother and sisters! Or I can give you something to cry about with my wand and my fists! Now shut the fuck up and go to sleep you little cry baby!_

"Stop! Stop! Please, Hermione, I don't want to talk about this right now!"

"Well, I do! He fucked me, but not fully!"

"URGH, WHERE'S YOUR FUCKING WAND! Tell me, tell me, so I can kill him, tell me so I can kill both of them!"

"B-both? Bellatrix…Are you talking about your dad, too?"

Bellatrix started pacing the room, walking in circles, hands still on her ears. "I need to go, I need to go, I need to go, I need to leave. I have to leave, right now, Hermione, give me your wand so I can feel relief. PLEASE!"

Hermione stared at her for a few seconds before responding, "Kreacher has it."

Bellatrix immediately left the room yelling for Kreacher. "Give me Hermione's wand," she demanded once she found him.

"Miss Hermione has forbidden me to give Miss Black her wand," Kreacher said turning his back to her.

Bellatrix snatched the elf up by his shirt and screamed in his face, "I KILLED ONE ELF, I CAN KILL ANOTHER, NOW GIVE ME THAT WAND!"

"No!" Kreacher stood his ground, "Kill me first, you crazy bitch."

"How _dare_ you speak to me that way, you filthy beast!" She threw him to the ground and screamed, "HERMIONE! COME DOWN HERE, NOW!"

Hermione, sobering up from all the commotion, skipped down the few stairs to where Bellatrix and Kreacher were.

"Tell this elf to give me your wand."

"No."

Bellatrix grabbed Hermione's shirt this time and pulled her closer to her, growling in her face, "If you don't give me that wand, do you know what's going to happen?"

"Take me with you."

Bellatrix stared at her thinking of what to say.

"He said to bring me," Hermione continued, "Just bring me. You said you're going to kill him. What harm will it do?"

"Give me your wand."

"Kreacher, give me my wand."

Kreacher clapped his hands twice and Hermione's wand appeared in his hands. He handed it to Hermione, and Hermione slowly handed it over to Bellatrix.

Bellatrix grabbed Hermione's wrist tightly before waving the wand.

They landed to an open area in the Forbidden Forest.

"Is there where Death Eaters used to meet?" Hermione asked.

"Shh!" Bellatrix put her hand up towards Hermione and listened to the sounds of the forest.

Hermione could hear talking deeper in the forest coming their way. After a minute, two men stepped into the open area revealing themselves. One Hermione didn't recognize, but the other, she recognized as Fenrir Greyback.

"See you brought the mudblood," he sneered, "_And_ the mudblood wand."

"Had to get here somehow," Bellatrix said in firm and cold voice Hermione recognized as the Bellatrix Lestrange tone. "Rabastan. You got out of Azkaban."

"Got out right after my brother got killed by that worthless piece of shit, Longbottom."

Hermione huffed at his comment, and Bellatrix grabbed her shoulder pulling her closer to her, "Well, you didn't just drag me out here to bitch about Rodolphus. Why am I here?"

"We got a lot of planning to do if we want to finish the Dark Lord's work," Fenrir said to her, "But we may have time to get to know your mudblood friend for the night."

"I've heard you already got to know her quit well," Bellatrix responded.

"I did, and I'd like to get to know her even more. I only got so far."

"So I heard, as well. You really are a dog, fucking anything and everything, even if it is a mudblood."

"Oh, so you do still have the hatred for mudbloods in you, Bellatrix? I heard you went off and fell in love with this one and the rest of Dumbledore's lot."

"How dare you? Shall we leave, then? Where to?"

"Lestrange Manor."

The four of them apparated and found themselves in the same room Hermione was in with Rodolphus last time she was there. Fenrir went to pull Hermione towards him, but Bellatrix kept a tight grip on her, "What do you need with her?"

"What'd you mean, what do I need with her?" Fenrir growled, "You know what I need her for."

"Such a tight grip, Bella," Rabastan said, "I think maybe you do have…feelings….for this thing."

"Don't let them get to you, Bellatrix. Come with us, and you won't have to tell anyone where you're going or what you're doing. You can have all the power. And you can be free. Free of the nonsense these filthy mudbloods have brought into our world. Remember what the Dark Lord always told us, there is no good or evil, only power, and those who are too weak to seek it. Are you weak, Bella?"

Bellatrix immediately threw Hermione onto the ground and casted the Cruciatus Curse on her, but nothing was happening.

"They don't work, unless you mean it, Bellatrix, and you don't mean to hurt the poor little mudblood, do you?"

"CRUCIO!"

Hermione's scream shattered their ears as Bellatrix concentrated as hard as she ever had while casting the unforgivable curse. The light from the tip of the wand green made it easy to distract the greenness from Bellatrix's face that Hermione easily saw whenever she had a chance to open her eyes. But when the curse was lifted, the green on her face was still there as Fenrir and Rabastan stared at her.

Just then, the whole manor shook violently. Hermione still laid on the ground gasping for air while the other three looked towards the front door to see the entire Order of the Phoenix burst through. Anyone that came into the manor without permission automatically had the Petrificus Totalus spell put on them, and that included the entire Weasley family, Harry, Neville, Luna, Professor McGonagall, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Andromeda Tonks, and even Narcissa and Draco Malfoy.

"Well, I almost can't believe you two are on their side," Fenrir spat at Narcissa and Draco, "But I guess maybe I can with a loser husband and father like yours. Now I have the chance to kill all of you, and once your precious little "order" is finished, I can be on my way. In fact, _we_ can be on our way, am I right Rabastan and Bella?"

Bellatrix was knelt down next to Hermione who was just opening her eyes and turned her head to look at Bellatrix.

"Maybe I should have my full way with her before we kill these traitors," Fenrir said, "Right in front of them."

He walked over and sneered at all of them, stopping at Ginny and Luna, "These two look like they could be a great addition to help me pleasure myself. But I think I'll wait. Bella, strip the mudblood girl."

Bellatrix slowly stood up bringing Hermione with her and held her very much like she did when they were last at Malfoy Manor.

"No," she simply said.

Fenrir turned around to look at her and was about to ask if he had heard her right.

Bellatrix was too quick. She lifted Hermione's wand and pointed it Fenrir, "AVADA KEDAVRA!"

She quickly pointed the wand at Rabastan, "AVADA KEDAVRA!"

She dropped Hermione's wand, and dropped Hermione who fell to the ground still having a hard time getting up from the Cruciatus Curse.

"Bella?" Hermione looked up and saw the look of horror on Bellatrix's face, like she had just killed someone for the first time.

"Avada…," Bellatrix whispered, "I…I'm still a murderer."

"No, Bellatrix, hang on."

"I'm still a murderer, and I don't belong here… I belong in hell."

"No, wait!" Hermione screamed after Bellatrix as she watched her run out of the manor and into the night. "Bellatrix! Come back!"

Hermione finally got up after a few minutes and walked over to pick up her wand. She undid the Petrificus Totalus spell and everyone gasped looking around.

"You have to help me find her!" Hermione cried to them.

Professor McGonagall immediately walked up to her hugging her, "We will find her, Hermione, I promise. I can't believe that just happened. She _killed_ the people she's been with far longer than she's been with us. They were like her family. And she gave it up, for us….for _you_."

"I knew she wouldn't let me down. I think I should go look for her alone, she can't have gone far, it's all fields around here."

"We will wait here for you."

Everyone hugged Hermione before she set off into the fields looking for Bellatrix. "Lumos." It was dark, and Hermione wondered if any other Death Eaters would come around.

"Bellatrix!" Bellatrix heard Hermione calling out to her. She was lying on the ground in the tall grass shaking, not knowing what to do.

"Bellatrix, I need you!" Hermione's calling that time made Bellatrix stand up slowly. Hermione saw her in the distance waving her arms and she ran over to her. Bellatrix was a sobbing mess and fell back to the ground when Hermione got to her. Hermione sat down next to her and held her, "It's going to be okay. I'm here with you. You're not a murderer. You saved me. You saved all of us!"

"I'm a killer," Bellatrix kept crying, "I hate myself."

"No, no! It's okay."

"But you said murder is never okay!"

"Well, it's not, but this was different. It was either them or us."

"I want my sisters!" Bellatrix cried like a lost little girl.

"Come on," she helped her up and walked her back to the Lestrange Manor.

Narcissa immediately ran out the door when she saw them approaching. Bellatrix hung onto her while they hugged.

"Oh, my goodness," Narcissa held her and rubbed her back as Andromeda came outside and joined them. "I've never seen her react this way after killing someone."

"Shows how much she's really changed since being with Hermione," Andromeda said.

"I'm going back to Azkaban," Bellatrix cried.

"No, you're not," Hermione said looking over at Professor McGonagall walking out towards them.

"Thank you, Ms. Black, thank you," she said when Bellatrix let go of Narcissa and was crying a little less. "We all thank you. Kingsley and I were talking while Hermione went to get you, and we have agreed to allow you 100% of your freedom back."

Bellatrix's eyes widened, "Even my wand?"

"Even your wand," Professor McGonagall laughed as Bellatrix hugged her and she felt a little better. "But we need to wait a few days before we can give that back to you. After everything that has happened, we need to file everything. So until then, we need you and Hermione to still stay at 12 Grimmauld Place."

Bellatrix nodded and Hermione grabbed her hand. Bellatrix looked down at their hands and then at her other hand holding her wand, "Sorry I used your wand to kill people."

"Neville did it first," Hermione smiled at her.

They all went back into the manor to join the others. Ginny, Harry, Ron, Luna, and Neville all crowded around Hermione and took turns hugging her. "How did you guys find out where we were, and how to get here?"

"We just guessed Lestrange Manor because of last time, and Neville helped us figure out where exactly it was from being here once before," Ron told her.

They all said their goodbyes and went back to their homes.

Bellatrix and Hermione arrived back at 12 Grimmauld Place. Hermione turned around and looked at Bellatrix. She threw her wand on the nearest table and grabbed Bellatrix closer kissing her like no tomorrow.

After a minute, she stopped and pulled back an inch, "I told you you're a good person. I told you you've gotten better. I told you."

Bellatrix smiled, "Guess I ought to start listening to you a little bit more."

"You guess? You better start doing all I say. I'm still in charge."

Bellatrix kissed her again, "Yes, mistress."

Both witches went up into one of the bedrooms and changed into night clothes, immediately falling asleep the second they hit the bed together. The next few days were all that stood between Bellatrix and her wand, and Hermione all the faith in the world that she would finally start using it for good.


	31. Chapter 31

**The worst thing about starting a new student teaching semester is having to just sit around and observe. It may not sound like it, but it is SO tiring. I can't wait to get up and do stuff.**

**Also, I really wish I would have named these chapters. They would have been so much more organized. But I'm too lazy to do all that right now. Maybe during the summer (yeah right).**

Although a lot of good had happened, despite the bad, the first night back at 12 Grimmauld Place was not the lovely welcome home it should've been for the two witches.

"Just leave it alone, Hermione," Bellatrix whined getting off the bed and walking towards one of the loveseat chairs.

"Don't you tell me to leave it alone," Hermione got up and walked towards her. She took a seat on her lap and softened her tone, "I know it's scary, love, but you need to be on a healthy sleeping schedule."

An hour after Bellatrix and Hermione had gotten home, they both fell asleep, but the older witch started having worse night terrors than ever before about everything that had gone on, and everything before. She refused to go back to sleep, even if it was 4 A.M.

Bellatrix looked away from Hermione, "I'll sleep when I need to. Right now, I'm perfectly wide awake."

"I'm glad the green face thing still works," Hermione laughed.

"You're the one that needs to sleep," Bellatrix got off the chair lifting Hermione up and carried her to the bed, "You're the one that had to endure all the madness."

"You endured it, too," Hermione said as Bellatrix started covering her up, "You saved me from the madness… Oh, I wish I could save you from it."

Hermione's eyes started watering. "Don't," Bellatrix said putting a finger to Hermione's lips, "I'll be fine. Remember it takes time."

"If you need me, just wake me up," Hermione sobbed.

"I always need you, sweet girl, and I know I'll always have you. Now get some sleep. Maybe I'll come join you in an hour once you're already dreaming."

"I love you," Hermione yawned.

"I love you," Bellatrix backed out of the room and quietly shut the door. She walked into the kitchen and started making a pot of coffee, something Hermione had taught her, and she was now getting addicted to, especially since she found out it helps wake you up. She noticed that even when she was awake, she couldn't shake the memories of her nightmares and memories. She shut her eyes and smacked her head. She wasn't dumb. She already knew she was developing bad self-harm habits. Telling Hermione would just worry the girl, and more interventions would be put in place. They may take back what they said about her freedom and wand. _Well that's not going to happen_, she told herself.

Hermione woke up around 10:30 A.M. and found no sign of Bellatrix in the room. She walked downstairs in the kitchen to find her sitting at the table with her cup of coffee.

"You didn't sleep at all last night?" Hermione said giving her a stern look.

Bellatrix got up to get more coffee and turned her back towards Hermione, "I-I did..I just got up before you is all."

Hermione briskly walked over to her and turned her around. Just then, Bellatrix pretended to sneeze covering her whole face. By the time Hermione got her hands removed, her face was perfectly fine, and not green as Hermione was checking to see.

"I don't believe you," Hermione said looking her straight in the eye.

Bellatrix froze and shifted her eyes, not knowing what to say or do.

"You _need_ to sleep," Hermione said grabbing her wrist, "Now come on."

"No! Stop!" Bellatrix tried prying Hermione's hands off her wrist, "I'M NOT TIRED!"

"I don't care if you're not tired, and since when do you drink coffee?"

"Since you showed it to me along with all your other muggle things."

"You're still officially under my supervision, and allowing you not to sleep is very unhealthy for you, physically and mentally."

"I'll fall asleep when I fall asleep."

"Fine, but no more coffee," Hermione grabbed her coffee cup and dumped it out not caring about Bellatrix's surprised gasp. She also threw away all the extra coffee grounds they had, "And you're coming with me upstairs to the bedroom."

"Oh mistress, what game are we going to play in the bedroom today?" Bellatrix hugged Hermione from behind.

Hermione rolled her eyes and smiled a little, "_We're_ not doing anything together except for being in the same room. You're going to be lying down on the bed while I read."

"But I.."

"No talking from this point on," Hermione interrupted her.

Bellatrix made grunting and groaning sounds the whole way upstairs.

"Stop," Hermione said when they got to the bedroom, she turned around and pointed her wand at Bellatrix.

Bellatrix put her hands up and smiled.

When Hermione walked into the bedroom, she pointed to the bed and grabbed one of her books from her bag and sat down in one of the loveseats. Bellatrix sat in the middle of the bed and stared at her.

"Lie down," Hermione said looking up at her.

Bellatrix gave her a weird look, "No. I'm not a dog."

"Do you need me to tuck you in like you did for me last night," Hermione put her book down and got up.

"No," Bellatrix tried scooting away from Hermione, "I don't need to lie down… because I'm not tired."

Hermione pulled the covers over, "Get your green-faced ass over here. Now!"

Hermione saw Bellatrix's face turn from green to red and real tears fill her eyes.

"Come on, Bella," Hermione said sitting on the bed with her, "You know they're still going to do a full exam on you before they actually set you free and give you your wand. You need to be healthy and alert. You can't stay awake the rest of your life."

Bellatrix looked away and sobbed, "I'm so tired."

"I bet so."

"I want my sisters."

Hermione got up and left the room to retrieve her cell phone. She thought it was funny that the youngest Black sister was always the one taking care of the oldest Black sister. She knew her relationship with Narcissa was much more than her one with Andromeda, so she called her and told her what was going on with Bellatrix and her night terrors.

"I have a bunch of calming potions I can give you," Narcissa said to Hermione, "I'm not sure if you want to slip it in one of her drinks or talk her into taking it."

"I don't want to lie to her," Hermione said.

"I will apparate there with a bunch of them in a few minutes."

"She said she wants her sisters," Hermione said to her the moment she arrived.

"She's always been so attached," Narcissa said handing Hermione a bag of potions. "I'm not sure if me going up there would be good for her or not."

"Maybe we should both go up there and talk to her about the potions," Hermione said pulling out a bottle of calming potion and setting the bag in the kitchen, "Not that we want to make it seem like an intervention."

"Are you saying that for yourself, or for her," Narcissa smiled.

"Both," Hermione smiled back.

They both walked up and into the room. Bellatrix was still sitting on the bed holding a pillow on her lap.

"Okay, sweetheart, it's time for your nap," Narcissa played at Bellatrix.

Bellatrix got up and walked over to Narcissa hugging her, "Will you just hold me?"

"I'll hold you as long as you close your eyes."

Bellatrix shook her head and held on tighter to Narcissa.

"Your sister brought you something, Bella," Hermione said holding up the potion.

Bellatrix looked at it and then stepped away from her sister a little. She gave it a suspicious look, "What's that?"

"It's just one of those calming potions mum used to give us when we were little," Narcissa explained.

"Oh, _just_ one of those calming potions mum gave to us? The same ones she gave us when father beat us so hard we could hardly sleep by ourselves because the pain was unbearable."

"These are actually the ones I sent to Draco during his sixth year, the same one he was supposed to kill Dumbledore because his crazy aunt wouldn't stop badgering him about it. Now you're going to take them, because I simply have to no use for them anymore."

"Give them to Hermione, she seems like she needs calming about this whole situation."

Hermione turned away, rolling her eyes and shaking her head.

"What are you so afraid of?" Narcissa said gently holding Bellatrix's arms, "Those dreams are not real."

"But they feel so real," Bellatrix said with her head down, "And I can really feel the pain."

"Just drink the potion, Bella," Hermione said walking over to them, "It really will help you. And I'll stay in here with you every time you go to sleep until we're absolutely sure the nightmares have stopped."

Bellatrix still looked at them with uncertainty.

"I'll have my phone, my book, my drink, and my snacks with me. I won't even leave this room. I'll even go to the bathroom with the door open, and same as if I decide to take a shower. If you start making sounds, I'll wake you up, and we'll go from there."

Bellatrix sighed, "Let me go change into my night clothes."

Hermione smiled at Narcissa and mouthed 'thank you' to her. When Bellatrix was in the bathroom, Narcissa said to Hermione, "It's I who should be thanking you. After all, she's only accepting to do this because you're going to be there with her the whole time. She wouldn't do this for anyone else."

"Not even for you?"

"She might do it for me, but you're more special to her."

"No. You're her sister!"

"And her hero, her guardian angel."

Bellatrix came out with scowl on her face and got under the covers.

"I think we'll be fine now, Narcissa, thank you," Hermione was still already in her night clothes from the night before, and got into the bed beside Bellatrix.

"Call me if you need me." And Narcissa apparated.

Hermione used her wand to shut the shades. She turned on the bedside lamp on her side.

"Oh, I guess I should've asked your sister how much you should drink of this…," Hermione said once she opened the bottle.

"The whole thing," Bellatrix grabbed the bottle and drank the whole thing in ten seconds.

"Thanks for not lying," Hermione smiled as Bellatrix handed her back the bottle. She set it on the table next to her as Bellatrix sighed obnoxiously and laid down all covered up and comfortable.

"Give me some of that calming potion," Hermione smiled bending down to kiss her.

"Don't you fall asleep," Bellatrix said closing her eyes.

"If I do, it's not the end of the world, remember I usually wake before your nightmares get to their worst."

"You're going to have to stay with me while I sleep for the rest of my life, you know that, don't you?"

"Just sleep, Bella."

Bellatrix put an arm around Hermione's waist as she opened her book.

Hermione had to wake Bellatrix up not even a half hour later when she started moaning, "Are you okay," she asked when Bellatrix lifted her head up and looked at her.

"It hurts so bad," Bellatrix said putting her head down on Hermione's lap.

"What does it feel like," Hermione wondered, "Like, how bad does it feel?"

"It feels like a thousand Charley Horses at once, or a Cruciatus Curse. I can feel those little tiny beetles stinging and biting me the way they did in Azkaban. I can feel the cold sting of my father's belt, and when the metal part hit me. I can feel the things I deserve to feel. I'm a bad person, and I need to suffer the consequences."

"Bella," Hermione bent down to her ear and cheek, "We've talked about this over and over; you have suffered the consequences."

"Then why do I feel so bad?"

"You're just now feeling bad about the things you did in the past. You already paid your dues… Well, I guess some people might not agree."

"They're right. I don't deserve a second chance."

"Everyone deserves a second chance. You're not being punished by these dreams. You're just going through a rough time. A lot of people have these sorts of dreams."

"Maybe they deserve it like me."

"You're never going to forgive yourself, are you?"

"Would you forgive yourself?"

"..No. I wouldn't."

Bellatrix sighed and closed her eyes. Hermione scooted down to lay next to Bellatrix and held her, "Just always remember that I love you, no matter what. I care about you, you matter to me. And I need you."

"I need you more."

Bellatrix fell back asleep, and Hermione knew she was right about her needing her more. People like Bellatrix, who have gone through the situations they have gone through during childhood, young adulthood, and adulthood, will always need someone to love them even more than the regular human being. She always thought Bellatrix had a lot of social issues, but it was her emotional issues that triggered the way she acts towards people. She's paranoid, dependent, and unsure of herself most of the time. Hermione tried her best throughout the whole day looking up ways on her computer to help Bellatrix get better. With a person like Bellatrix, you need all the help you can get.


	32. Chapter 32

**I know. SHUT UP! It's been a very long…like..five months. **

**But I'm finally graduated! Now I'm working on getting my actual teaching certificate for Michigan, and then I can look for a teaching job.**

**Anyways, I've missed Bella and Hermione very much. I thought about them all the time. Now that I'm working at Kroger for the summer, and probably only subbing for one year until I get a teaching job, I'll have a lot more time to actually THINK about this story.**

**Thanks to everyone who still follows this story, and who favorited and all that stuff and yada yada yada.**

**Also, I've been researching on all the people killed by Bellatrix and there are only a few known by name. I originally had the list of people at 63, then I thought that was too much and brought it down to 32, but then I thought, she's Bellatrix Lestrange. I was going to put the whole list on here, but I doubt you guys want to go through random names that I'm probably making up, so we'll only get to see a few of the names on the list.**

Bellatrix was able to sleep throughout most of the day, but that meant she was actually wide awake during the night and she wasn't faking it this time.

"You know what might really make you feel better," Hermione said getting into bed so she could finally sleep.

"Bringing Rod back to life, and killing him over and over again?" Bellatrix said not looking up from her family's photo album she had been looking at.

"No, that would get boring after a while. I was thinking you should go and see all the family of the people you've killed and talk to them, ask them for forgiveness, and just be honest with them about everything you've been going through these past months."

Bellatrix put the album down so she could see Hermione, "That would take ages. Aren't you supposed to be a history guru? I've killed way too many people."

"I know," Hermione said not phased, "I already thought it out. I was looking at this program they have at St. Mungo's.."

"I am NOT going to a loony bin," Bellatrix slammed the album shut.

"You didn't even let me finish!"

"I don't have to let you finish, I know you're just trying to get rid of me and send me to some place where you don't have to do anything anymore."

"Bella," Hermione got out of bed and walked over to where she was sitting. She sat on Bellatrix's lap, holding her head against her chest, "I will never leave you. How many times am I going to have to tell you?"

"Until the day I die."

"This program is just to help you prepare for meeting the families of the people you've killed. You'll meet with five families a day, only on weekdays. If you do it consecutively, you could get done in a little less than two weeks. I know it sounds crazy, and yes, I've already read about the 32 people you've killed."

"You know I've killed _32_ people and you _still_ want to be around me? And that must not even count all the countless people I've tortured into insanity. Why do you still talk to me?"

"Stop trying to understand why, you'll never know."

"I can't, I won't be able to face those people."

"You faced Neville. You were lucky with him, especially since his parents are still alive. He was very understanding. Not all these families are going to be understanding, but I believe it's something you need to do. It's the last step before you can finally be free again."

"I thought I was already going to be free, and get my wand back? Why do you people always keep flip flopping everything?"

"If you do this," Hermione pulled Bellatrix's face toward hers, "I'll give you your wand back, and I'll let you get to the home base with me."

Bellatrix licked her lips while she thought about it, "I thought you weren't the one withholding my wand."

"I wasn't, but it's in my possession now."

"Why, all of a sudden, is my wand in your possession? Are you trying to be me again like at the bank?"

"No..I've been thinking….I really want to help more people like you. So I'm taking classes to sort of become a counselor of some sort. Luckily, because of all my time with you, and other reasons, I get to study more over the summer and then start a paid internship in the fall."

Bellatrix thought about what she said for a moment and then folded her arms and turned her face towards her, "So you'll be seeing other death eaters and having all of them fall in love with you, just like you did with me?"

Hermione rolled her eyes as Bellatrix nervously started tapping her foot, "No. You're the only one I really love, you know that, deep down, you lunatic." Hermione pulled her close and wrapped her arms around her placing her head on Bellatrix's shoulder. She could feel the normal tenseness of Bellatrix start to fade away a little as she unfolded her arms and held Hermione closer.

"I really want to help people, Bella," Hermione said to her, "These people have no one else. Maybe they'll fall in love with me, I doubt it. But no one can take your place, never."

"Everyone you meet falls in love with you, you're that desirable. But I have no problem being evil and selfish and keeping you all to me."

Hermione knew Bellatrix was being serious, but she laughed, "I'm not that desirable. Remember I'm a mudblood and not everyone.."

"Stop using that word! You make me feel bad for using it, and the definition of it is not who you really are!"

"It's just a stupid word, Bella. It's meaningless to me, really. I used to get upset by it, but not anymore."

Bellatrix held her tight and kissed her whispering, "You're so much more than you know."

Bellatrix stood up with Hermione in her arms and set her down on the bed climbing on top of her. She started kissing her until Hermione pushed her away, "Is that a yes?"

Bellatrix sighed, "I have nothing else to do with my life."

"Don't worry, Bella," Hermione breathed as Bellatrix nipped her neck, "This will be the very last step before you are free again, I promise."

"And what does free mean, exactly?"

"You have your wand, no one is watching and keeping tabs on you, you can go wherever you want without telling anyone, you no longer have to have me around if you don't want."

"But…I can have you around, right?"

Hermione smiled, "Of course, I just don't want to force myself onto you."

"I want you to force yourself onto me," Bellatrix smiled back.

"Then I'll stay, or go wherever you go, or whatever, we'll figure it out."

Bellatrix sat up and looked away.

"What's wrong," Hermione sat up with her and grabbed her hand.

"You won't have any obligations to me then, and if I do something, or say something to upset you, because you know I will, because it's who I am, you won't have to stay with me…you'll be able to leave."

"Bella, of course you'll drive me bonkers sometimes, but I'm sure I'll do the same to you, it's what couples do to balance their relationship, we can't all be perfect stepford wives."

Bellatrix continued to stare away from her. Hermione turned her face towards her and kissed her as lovingly as she knew how, "I love you. I _need_ you."

"What do you-"

"SHHHH!"

Hermione pulled her down on top of her and closed her eyes. Bellatrix listened to Hermione's heartbeat and breathing steady out as the minutes went by.

Little did Bellatrix know that Hermione had already signed her up for the program at St. Mungo's.

"You start next Monday, July 27," Hermione said when she first woke up the next morning.

"That's way too soon," Bellatrix whined, "I'm not ready."

"Bellatrix, you'll never be ready."

"Will you be with me?"

"No, you'll be in a secure room alone with each family. I have classes to go to and other things I need to take care of."

"Like what?"

"You'll see soon, just not now."

"If it involves me, I demand to know now."

"You don't demand anything to me! Here," Hermione handed Bellatrix a sheet with names and dates on it, "These are all the people you've murdered, that we know of. You might want to refresh your memory of them before you talk to their families. You're going to be writing letters and explanations to each family."

"UGH!"

"Whatever," Hermione shrugged, "Go back to Azkaban."

"Alright, you should get a job as a dementor and give me the kiss of death."

"I've been trying to give you the kiss of life these past few months."

"You've given me more than that, love."

Hermione laughed a little, "Me; a mudblood?"

"Again with that word! You know I don't like it!"

"What? I have my doubts, too, about you caring for me. You spent all that time in your life hating people like me, and now you suddenly care? But… I know you're not lying."

"I'm never lying when it comes to caring about you. I love you, Hermione. And I know it seems odd coming from someone like me. Sometimes I still even hate all the other..muggle borns, except you."

Hermione kissed her and touched her lips with her finger tips as she pulled away, "You'll be okay."

"Where're you going," Bellatrix asked when she saw Hermione pick up her enchanted bag.

"It's a surprise. I'll be back. Start looking over those papers." And with that, Hermione apparated leaving Bellatrix alone with a list and description of the people she's forced into death. She noticed the names were separated by years; the first year being 1969.

She read the first name; the first person she killed; the first task Voldemort gave to her.

_Frank Dawlish_

_Born: 17-03-1951_

_Died: 06-04-1969_

Bellatrix had remembered him well. He was only a week and a half older than her. She had seen him numerous times whilst growing up. He was a pureblood, but very nice to her and her sisters. She heard he started affiliating himself with Voldemort once he graduated from Hogwarts. So, naturally, she was shocked when he was to be the first of many people she would kill. When she daringly asked Voldemort why Frank, he responded with, "why not?" When her first task was over, Voldemort had her torture a young couple of random muggles. He asked her how she felt and Bellatrix looked up at him with a dark glare. Voldemort raised an eyebrow in curiosity waiting for an answer. "Powerful…but only under your command…my lord."

Bellatrix skimmed down the page and went down to the year Voldemort was first defeated; 1981. She remembered the last order she took from him before he went to the Potters' house was that morning on the 31st of October.

"You've been with me for a little over ten years, Bellatrix," Voldemort said to her in a dark room of one of his many hideouts. "Tonight will be the night I will finally end the prophecy we have been discussing in our latest meetings. Then, we will be able to rid the world of the ignorant filth that lies upon it." Bellatrix stood silently watching him in obsession and awe as he continued. "Tonight, I need you to kill Payton."

"Payton, my lord?"

"Yes. He is a double agent with the..Order of the Phoenix."

"Yes, my lord."

_Jeffrey Payton_

_Born: 28-07-1945_

_Died: 31-10-1981_

"Soon, my dear and faithful Bellatrix, everything I have promised you will come forth."

Bellatrix looked up into his eyes as they locked together and he knew they both had each other's full trust and commitment.

Bellatrix folded the paper of names angrily and put it away in the bedside drawer.

"Bloody fucker, I'll spit on your grave," Bellatrix started pacing talking to Voldemort as if he were right there with her. "Never cared about me." Bellatrix sat on the bed and brought her knees up to her chest and held them. "Never cared about me or anyone." She softened her voice and said sadly, "Never cared about yourself. Because no one ever did anyways, not really."

Bellatrix was finally starting to realize what Hermione meant by helping others like herself. Hermione was the total opposite of Voldemort. Hermione loved her when she was good, and when she was bad. Hermione wanted to help her even after knowing about all the horrible things she had done, and the things she thought and sometimes still does. Hermione makes her feel loved, and tells her out loud how much she is loved. Besides her sisters, Hermione is the only person that loves Bellatrix back.

She laid down on the bed putting a pillow over her face, and cried.


	33. Chapter 33

Bellatrix had fallen asleep and woke up hours later to the sound of Hermione talking on her phone somewhere in the building. She saw it was still light outside, but only just and knew she needed to get herself back on a regular sleeping schedule soon if she was going to get through the next few weeks like Hermione wanted her to.

She got up and followed Hermione's voice into the kitchen downstairs. She was talking on her phone to someone, but smiled and winked at Bellatrix when she saw her walk in. Bellatrix raised her eyebrows suggestively as Hermione turned away from her and seemed to end her conversation. She had her back to Bellatrix when she hung up, leaning against the counter.

Bellatrix smoothly walked over and grabbed Hermione from behind sneering in her best evil Bellatrix Lestrange voice, "Who were you talking to, girly, another one of your death eater lovers?"

Hermione gasped a little when she grabbed her, but smiled and giggled a little when she felt Bellatrix's breath on her ear trace down her neck, "Nice try, Bella. There's no way you could revert back to Bellatrix _Lestrange_. You are now, and forever will be, Bellatrix _Black_, the love of my life and reason and purpose for my entire existence."

Bellatrix sniffed, "I'm too lazy to argue with that right now."

Hermione turned around, "Have a nice nap? Glad you're sleeping again. You looked so adorable hugging that pillow."

Bellatrix flashed Hermione a smile that made her insides swoon, "I know." Hermione let out a louder gasp than before when Bellatrix lifted her up onto the counter, her hands flat down on the counter on each side of Hermione's legs, "So who were you _really_ talking to?"

Hermione sighed and smiled as she rolled her eyes, "I walk talking to Harry."

"About what," Bellatrix said not fazed by Hermione's act of making fun of her.

"Well, he said that he's gone through everything in the building, so he said that everything else can be yours and your sisters', but that would take a long time to go through it all. Harry's going to be needing this house soon after you finish at St. Mungos. I think I'll just apparate the stuff to where we'll be going when you're done so you can look it over there."

"And where exactly are we going?" Bellatrix slowly sneaked her hands under the front of Hermione's shirt.

"I'm not telling you," Hermione sang as she grabbed Bellatrix's hands.

Bellatrix gave Hermione a very pouty and disappointed look that anyone _but_ Hermione would fall for. Bellatrix whimpered like a little child or a lost puppy.

Hermione looked at her seriously, "I just hope that you won't get upset when you find out where we're going…and about what I did."

"What did you do?"

"I'm not telling you!"

"Well, why are you so worried that I'll get upset? It's not like I'm going to go off and throw a tantrum, I'm sure it can't be that bad."

Hermione gave her the 'come on' look and started mocking her, "My name's Bellatrix Black! People think that I'm moody, even though my mood always has a cocky and snarky attitude. I hate everyone because everyone hates me, but I just want people to like me. I love Hermione. I want to kill everyone. I don't want to go back to Azkaban, but I do because I think I deserve it even though I spent 14 years there and am going to eventually apologize and try to become a better person. I even have become a better person, but I'm so insecure I need Hermione to love me 24/7. Love love love me Hermione. I want to kill everyone else though!"

"I would seriously slit your fucking throat with my nails right now if you weren't so fucking cute and Hermione Granger."

"Yay, I'm me!"

Bellatrix smirked at her as she pulled her hands out from under her shirt and grabbed the top of her pants.

"Bellatrix Druella Black!" Hermione grabbed her hands again, "Here," she put them back under her shirt.

Bellatrix rolled her eyes.

"Hey," Hermione caught her.

"How the hell do you know my middle name?"

"I know a lot about you," Hermione smiled pulling her closer.

"I just enjoy pulling on your pants," Bellatrix yanked them again.

"Hey, I _said_ we'd get to home base after St. Mungos. Stop acting like a hormonal adolescent male."

"That's not fair. I bet you walk around town with your sexiness forcing all males genitals to harden and then you just prance away like, 'I'm Hermione Granger! Not only am I the Golden Girl, but I'm also the smartest witch of my age, and I'm super duper hot! But I don't know that because I'm too busy reading books about useless facts that I'll probably never even use especially since I have another genius witch right in the palm of my hand named Bellatrix Black, tee hee hee!'"

"You're daft."

"You're a dope."

"Oh yeah, and why's that?" Hermione straightened up and folded her arms while raising her eyebrows.

"Because you come here, so deliciously devourable and expect me to contain myself." Bellatrix leaned into Hermione super close talking into her ear creating more tickling feelings travel down her neck.

Hermione grabbed Bellatrix's face with one hand and pulled it in front of her own, "You've contained yourself this long, which knowing you, Bellatrix, who needs to have everything her way, is very surprising."

"I did it out of respect for you," Bellatrix said her cheeks still squished in Hermione's hand.

Hermione let go of Bellatrix's face and put her arm around her neck, "Aww, you're so sweet." She kissed Bellatrix and placed her forward against hers.

"I'm just being stupid," Bellatrix said, "I knew you wouldn't let me get far."

"I know you've been locked away and crave physical human contact."

"Only from you."

"I promise there will be a huge amount of time for us to…_explore_ each other once you're done at St. Mungos. And although I've never _willingly_ had sexual intercourse with someone, I'm actually pretty excited to give you all the pleasure you deserve and more."

"No, it won't be me getting pleasure. I'll be pleasuring you, because you're the only reason I'm even still here. It has to be all about you."

"No it doesn't, it can be about us both."

"No….I don't deserve and I never will. And you really do deserve more than _me_."

"This is why I want it to be about you, because I want to show you how much I love you, how much I need you and crave you, how much I really do care about you."

Bellatrix sighed and closed her eyes which were tearing up, "I was his second-in-command, his last and best lieutenant."

"Was. Stop living in the past, Bella. Live in the now…live here… with me." Hermione placed Bellatrix's hand on her chest.

"I know I need to, but I won't be fully able to until I get done talking to all those families. I read two people on that list while you were gone, and it brought back some painful memories. Back then, I was so clouded with dark obsession."

"Must've been addicting."

"Not as addicting as you." Bellatrix opened her eyes and wiped away her tears as she leaned forward and closed them again to get lost in Hermione's kiss. "You're so delicious. I can't wait until all this stupid shit is done and over with so I can rape you over and over again."

"It's not rape if I enjoy it."

"I haven't been with anyone in a long time," Bellatrix giggled evily, "especially not with a _woman_ such as yourself."

"Like I said before, neither have I, and I don't think I'll have a problem. You seem to be…extra sensitive in many ways, physically and emotionally."

"What does that mean?"

"I think you know what it means." Hermione gave her a quick kiss and jumped off the counter. "So what else did you say you did while I was gone besides sleep?"

"I looked up those two men."

"The ones in entirely different years. If I'm not mistaken, I was told you'd be talking with families in order from when they were killed. You'll have five a day, ten minutes each. One hour; five minutes to prepare before, and five minutes after to reflect."

"So I only have to be there an hour?"

"Uhhm, well….," Hermione walked around Bellatrix twiddling her fingers knowing she wouldn't like what she was going to tell her next.

"Well…what?"

"You're going to have to be living at the hospital for the week and a half.."

"What?!"

"You'll get to come here on weekends! They need to make sure everything is okay."

"Well, god dammit, fuck everything, it won't be okay if I have to stay _there_..and where will you be?"

"I'll be doing my classes and such. We'll still be able to talk on the phone and text each other. Bella, I promise, this time you won't get hurt. I mean…" Hermione walked back over to her seeing the frightened tears fall from her face and held her, "It's going to be hard, but they're not going to hurt you, or send you back to Azkaban."

"But what if I lose control? What if I do something that makes them have to send me back there?"

"They already signed a paper saying they can't do anything with you without my consent, and trust me, no matter what, I'm not letting you go back there. I'm actually trying to shut that place down."

"Good luck." Bellatrix sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve.

"I promise I'll talk to you every day, we'll talk a lot. And then when it's over, we'll be together, and no one and nothing can do anything about it. Trust me, Bella, please. I got this under control."

"I'm just scared," Bellatrix whispered embarrassed by her tears and emotions.

"I know. I expected you to be. I'm glad you're not yelling bloody murder at me though."

"I know you're only trying to help. And you do a great job at it."

"I hope I can help the others like I helped you."

"Only without seducing them."

Hermione laughed, "Right."

"Oh, I'm dead serious."

"Don't worry, Bella!" Hermione continued laughing as she grabbed Bellatrix's hand and led her out of the kitchen and towards the staircase.

"Where are we going now," Bellatrix asked slyly.

"Well, you still can't actually leave the house yet, so why not go through some of the stuff Harry left for us?"

"Won't most of it be my aunt and uncle's stuff?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't mean you can't keep it if you want."

"I've never went through old family things before, not even my parents."

"Do you think I should call your sisters and ask if they want to join us?"

"No," Bellatrix snorted like she never liked her sisters to begin with.

"Why the tone?"

"They'll get all gushy and make it into a huge family thing; 'Bella, remember this, Bella remember that.' And I won't because I don't care."

Hermione stopped and turned around putting her hand on Bellatrix's cheek, "I know because of all the bad memories you want to block out your entire childhood, but I think it would be good to let your sisters gush over the good times. Weren't your uncle and aunt good people?"

"Well, they were, until they kicked out Sirius, if we're going by your standards."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that."

"But yeah, I guess they were better than my own parents most of the time. They weren't as crazy, at least I don't think they were, to my sisters and I."

"Well, I'm going to message your sisters, and if they want to come they can, but I don't want to intrude so I'll probably go out since I actually can now."

"Go out where," Bellatrix asked with squinting eyes.

"Out to Azkaban to tell them we're bringing you back for good," Hermione rolled her eyes and turned dragging Bellatrix behind more upstairs.

Hermione had called both Narcissa and Andromeda who both agreed to meet with Bellatrix at 12 Grimmauld Place to go through their uncle and aunt's old things. Hermione gave a little smile at a glaring Bellatrix before apparating away.

The three sisters, or mostly the two, talked about the memories and laughed reminiscing about the times they spent there. Bellatrix kept her eye on Andromeda most of the time knowing that her daughter was the last person on the list Hermione has recently given her. How Andromeda could still stay in a room with her without going off still boggled her mind. Nevertheless, Andromeda and Narcissa treated Bellatrix as if her former life as a death eater just didn't happen. She eventually loosened up and talked and joked with them. Deep down, she felt sad and wished that they could have had more times like these when they were little.

Andromeda had an enchanted box, much like Hermione's enchanted purse, to put all the things they wanted to keep in. They browsed through the rest of the house and eventually moseyed into the room with the Black family tree.

"Neither of us are on here anymore," Narcissa said putting her hand on the wall.

"Perhaps we should start a new one," Andromeda proposed.

"I don't know if Potter is going to want that," Bellatrix said.

"Not here, at the Black manor," Andromeda said, then gasped when Narcissa hit her and put her finger to her lips.

Not noticing their little tiff, Bellatrix went on, "Dad would really like that, wouldn't he?"

"Don't let dad worry you, Bella," Andromeda went on.

Bellatrix had her back to them, she had been able to calm her frustrations and anger tantrums for a while with Hermione around, but something boiled up inside her. She turned around, "You don't have to try and comfort me anymore, Andy. I mean, it's not like we're little girls under the age of ten anymore, right? It's not like I sit around all day and all night when Hermione's not here wondering why our father was the way he was and why our mother never did anything about it. Who needs him? I learned my first spell without him, I learned how to ride a broom without him, I learned how to mix powerful potions without him. I even learned how to cast all the unforgivable curses without him, and no thanks to him, I was one of the most feared Death Eaters in the world! I got through school without him, I learned how to fight for myself without him, even when he beat me bloody to the ground during summer break, I still got up and wiped myself off without his god damn help! And although I'm not making excuses for myself, but he's part of the reason I'm a fuck up and went to Azkaban for 14 fucking years, and he never once said a word to me, he never once told me he loved me, he never once gave a flying fuck about you, mum, or me! To hell with him! I hope he dies a painful death and rots in the ground with no one to mourn over him."

"Bella…," Narcissa started to walk over to her, but stopped as soon as Bellatrix went on again.

"Don't! I don't need your sympathy! I can do this on my own. I'm going to get through this stupid St. Mungos shit and clean my act up, and you see I'll be a better person! No thanks to him, I don't need him. Hermione was a better parent than he'll ever be! So if you think I'm ever going to go back to that hell hole, you've got another thing coming."

Bellatrix walked out leaving a stunned Narcissa and Andromeda.

"Should we tell Hermione," Andromeda asked.

"It won't be the same, he's not there anymore, and she's fixing the place up. But…maybe we should mention it to her."

"Tell her what," Bellatrix came back in with a knife from the kitchen.

"Bellatrix, put that down, you're not a crazed death eater anymore," Narcissa scolded her.

"Don't you tell me what to do, I'm the only reason your family is still alive," Bellatrix growled as Andromeda held her back.

Narcissa gasped, "Fuck you," and apparated.

"Nice one , Bella," Andromeda said letting her go.

"Right, always blame me," she threw the knife down and walked away. Andromeda sighed and apparated.

Bellatrix sat down in the kitchen alone, twitching from anger. Suddenly, she got up and flipped over the table and walked out.

Narcissa and Andromeda called each other straight afterword and messaged Hermione about everything. Hermione immediately apparated back to 12 Grimmauld place to calm Bellatrix down.

"Bellatrix!" Hermione yelled when she got there. "You still here, love? Or did you finally break out?"

Hermione searched all the rooms. She heard Bellatrix crying in room on the top floor just below the attic. She walked in and didn't see her. She decided she must be hiding in the closet. Bellatrix was curled into a ball lying on her side with her arms covering her whimpering face.

Hermione kneeled down and started rubbing her arm, "It's okay, baby." Bellatrix, hearing the touching term of endearment, lowered her arms to reveal a trembling, red, tear-stained face with hints of anger in her eyes.

Hermione smiled at her. She grabbed her by her upper arms and got her to sit up.

"I ruin everything," Bellatrix said with a hoarse voice.

"No you don't," Hermione brushed the sweaty hair out of Bellatrix's face, "Your sisters talked to me. It's okay to get upset sometimes, Bellatrix, even mandatory in your case."

"But will I ever get better? Will I ever be normal? Because I swear to you, Hermione, I'm trying, and I'll try harder! I'll try to be normal!"

"You're fine, my love! But…I think we need to talk."

Bellatrix lifted her head up at Hermione with wide eyes, "You're going to send me away!"

"What? No, Bella, come on, get up off the ground," Hermione helped her up, "Come sit with me here on the bed. I just think we need to discuss my 'surprise' I had for you, because of what your sisters told me."

"What did they tell you? I'm ruining your surprise now?"

"Well, I just don't want to upset you. And this surprise isn't supposed to upset you. It's supposed to be nice."

"Don't tell me, I don't want to ruin it because I'm a psycho."

"Okay, if you say so."

"Thank you for finding me…in the closet."

Hermione hugged her tightly, "It'll be okay, Bella. It will be."

Bellatrix hugged her back just as tightly, holding so much doubt deep inside her about everything really being alright, but whispered bravely, "…I know."


	34. Chapter 34

It was the Friday before Bellatrix was going to St. Mungos and Hermione just helped her write her first five letters for Monday so she'd be ready. It took Bellatrix a while to really remember a few of the people who were first on the list. She was told she needed to use her afternoons at the hospital to write letters for the next day. Even though Bellatrix had been anxious, she felt a little better this evening as she laid comfortably on one of the beds at 12 Grimmauld. She sighed contentedly as if relaxing into a nice hot bath.

Hermione heard her as she walked in with two glasses of ice water for them, "Glad you sound happier today." She set Bellatrix's glass on her side and went over to her own to make herself as comfortable as Bellatrix looked.

"Well," Bellatrix lifted off the bed a little and turned towards Hermione, "I was looking at the list a little more, and it's not just people I've killed, it's people I've tortured, too."

"Who else is on there?"

"Neville's mum and dad."

"But you were only responsible for his dad, I thought."

"Yeah, well I guess they say if you're a witness who does nothing to stop it, then you're still just as responsible."

"So….you're happy because you get to talk to the families about the people you've tortured, too?" Hermione raised her eyebrows at her looking a little lost.

"No, no! Neville's mum and dad were the only ones on the list that I haven't killed, _but_ Neville sent me a text message today saying that he talked to the hospital and got them off the list so that's one less person I have to deal with! That means I only have one person (Andromeda, God help me) on that last Tuesday and then I'll be done!"

"Oh, well that was nice of him." Hermione turned away almost feeling bad that she didn't think it was that big of a deal.

"Wasn't it?" Bellatrix laid back over as well, "I love that boy, Neville Longbottom. I would marry him if I could, then I'd be Bellatrix Longbottom. Can you imagine what the papers would say? Longbottom boy marries woman who tortured his parents into insanity through some sort of Stockholm Syndrome gag."

Hermione looked over and gave her a really weird look.

"What?" Bellatrix asked innocently, persuading Hermione that she really didn't know what her look was about.

"Fine," Hermione sat on the bed and turned her back towards Bellatrix smiling slyly and slowly getting her water.

"Fine, what? Where're you going?" Bellatrix didn't move an inch.

"Well, if you're going to marry Neville, it's only right that I go sleep in another room-"

Bellatrix got up like a ninja and grabbed and pulled Hermione towards her, making Hermione spill the water all over the carpet.

"I said I would marry Neville if I _could_," Bellatrix held Hermione on her lap surveying her smiling face, now Bellatrix was wearing the weird look.

"What, is he too young for you?" Hermione burst out laughing grabbing onto Bellatrix's shirt and putting her forehead onto her shoulder to help her stop.

"Yes, I mean, no! You're the same bloody age!"

Hermione lifted her head up and still giggled a little as she quieted down, "Then what's the big problem?"

"Well, idiot, although I do love your friend for being so forgiving and nice lately, I can't marry him, because I've made a decision that the next person I marry I love the most in the world, and Neville isn't the person I love most in the world. So you see where I got the 'if I _could_' from?"

"And who is it you love most? One of those deathly black owls at Hogwarts? Kreacher?"

"Fuck you!" Bellatrix smacked Hermione playfully, "You know very well it's your skanky ass I love the most!"

"Skanky?"

"You're a mind-skank, but you don't know it."

"A mind-skank? What the hell is that," Hermione was still laughing.

"I told you about how you go around making all the boys horny, even though you don't know it."

Hermione sighed smiling and shook her head, "The conversations we have…They're even weirder than the ones I've had with Ron and Luna put together."

"If that's an insult towards me.."

"It's not! Stop being so defensive!"

"You're the one who started being defensive in the first place!"

"I knew what you meant, stupid. I was just playing with you, don't you see me laughing, weirdo?"

Bellatrix pulled her in close and hugged her, "I'll get you another glass of water, or better yet, you can have mine, that way I don't have to get up."

"Then what will you drink on this hot day?"

"We'll share."

Hermione climbed off of Bellatrix and sat next to her, "Oh, I didn't know Slytherins knew how to share."

"As long as you don't get your slobbery lion drool all over the cup, I'm fine."

"I'm not _that_ slobbery."

"Not having it."

"Not even a slobbery kiss?"

Bellatrix turned and smirked at Hermione, "You are a bestial lion, aren't you?" Bellatrix pulled Hermione towards her, "See what I mean about your sexiness driving me in all the time?"

"Mhmm," Hermione answered, "Except this time I know I'm doing it."

Hermione kissed Bellatrix with extreme passion. Afterwards, Bellatrix held her in place wanting to kiss again, but Hermione held back.

"You're such a fucking tease," Bellatrix almost yelled, "How am I going to make it until I'm done with St. Mungos?"

"I have a feeling there will be more important things on your mind while you're there," Hermione laughed as she pulled Bellatrix down to lie on top of her. Not surprised, Hermione found that Bellatrix fell fast asleep the second she laid her head on Hermione's chest. She grabbed her cell phone and sent Neville a quick thanks for looking out for Bellatrix.

Neville: Well I wanted to do something to help, especially after you told me about how uptight she's been acting, or at least, more uptight than usual.

Hermione put her phone away and smiled. If Neville can forgive Bellatrix… But then, she didn't actually murder his parents. She really hoped things were going to be okay, and that nothing wrong would happen while Bellatrix was there. She hoped Bellatrix would understand that not all the families she was going to see were going to be as forgiving and understanding, and that she would get past that without allowing it to push her over the edge. That's all she could do was hope.

The weekend breezed by and Bellatrix quickly went back to her high level of anxiety, and whenever Hermione touched her, she could feel that Bellatrix was about as tense as she was when Hermione first came to her after Voldemort died.

"Just breathe deeply and relax," Hermione was trying to give Bellatrix a massage before going to the hospital, but it was turning out to be a fail.

"It's not going to work," Bellatrix said tensing up more as Hermione tried to help her, "My sisters always tried to give me massages to help me relax, but I've always been this tense, I can't help it; especially since what's about to go on."

"Your body is so hard, I could put a knife in your back and you probably wouldn't feel it," Hermione laughed. "When this is all done and over with, I'm going to really work on you."

"That sounds sexy," Bellatrix turned around and smirked pulling Hermione in an embrace. "Your silly words of love and faithfulness do help me relax somewhat."

"Remember," Hermione pulled back and looked seriously at her, "You don't have to be locked in your room if you don't want to; you are allowed to roam the entire hospital, and go to the cafeteria whenever you like… Except the fifth floor, you aren't allowed to go there; very sick patients are there. And you can call or text me anytime you need to, except for that one hour of the day when you're with those families. Don't let the nurses take anything away from you. They might be a little skeptical knowing who you are, but just remind them that you're with me. Call me if you have any problems."

"What if they take my phone away from me?" Bellatrix asked.

"They shouldn't, but if they do…. Use one of their phones to call me. Do you know my number by heart?"

"No. Am I supposed to?"

Hermione sighed, "No. Let's just go. I'll talk to them when we get there."

Bellatrix picked up her bag as Hermione grabbed her other cold and clammy hand, and they apparated to the hospital. She seemed to have that weird look on her face just like the one she gets when she talks about Azkaban. After she talked to the nurses and doctors who were going to be taking care of Bellatrix, Hermione walked back to her.

"I talked to them about everything we discussed earlier, so you should be fine," Hermione said with a nervous look on her face.

Bellatrix let out an exasperated sigh, "Don't look so worried, Hermione, I'll be fine, just as you say, right?"

Hermione nodded scrunching up her face like she was about to burst into tears.

"Ugh, it's not like I'm going back to Azkaban!" Bellatrix nearly shouted as Hermione hugged her, "This was all your stupid idea anyways." She hugged her back, but narrowed her eyes at one of the nurses who was staring. Bellatrix pulled away and gave Hermione a quick kiss on the lips before walking towards the other nurses as the one who was staring walked away.

Although Bellatrix acted tough, Hermione watched a nervous and teary eyed, yet cavalier and stubborn towards the nurses, Bellatrix walk away out of her sight. Hermione let out of deep breath and closed her eyes as she apparated back to 12 Grimmauld.

Hermione checked her phone to see if Bellatrix had already texted her, but her phone had nothing new on it. She didn't have to wait two hours later to get an upset text message from her crazy beloved though.

Bellatrix: I hate it here. I want to go home. This isn't working and you need to come get me now before I do something.

Hermione: What happened?

Bellatrix: Everything!

Hermione sighed and decided to call Bellatrix so she could easily explain herself.

"What happened," Hermione asked her again once she answered her phone.

"I told you! I hate it here!"

"But why? Calm down. Where are you?" Hermione could hear Bellatrix breathing fast and trying to sound angry rather than like she was crying.

"I locked myself in my room."

"Okay, lay down on your bed and just breathe. Calm yourself down before we start talking again."

"I can't!" Bellatrix sobbed into the phone. She threw herself on her bed and gripped the blankets.

"I really don't want to have to come there, Bellatrix, so I need you to take more of those deep breaths we were talking about."

"I don't know anyone here," Bellatrix said finally calmed down after a minute.

"Is that why you hate it there?"

"No."

"Well, start from the beginning, from when I first left you. Tell me about your day up until now."

"My anger was fused before you left!"

"Okay, just tell me why you're so fucking mad, Jesus, Bellatrix!"

Bellatrix made an angry pouting noise at Hermione's little outburst, "That nosey nurse started it."

"What nurse? The ones that are trying to help you?"

"No! There was a nurse that was staring at us before you left, then she quickly walked away as if to tell someone. I think she's spying on me."

"You're delusional, Bella, really now. Is that all that made you upset?"

"No, this whole talk to the family thing is a fail!"

"What happened? Did none of them seem forgiving enough?"

"They were all forgiving, except for the last one; she really pissed me off!"

"You can't expect everyone to take well to you, Bella. But the rest were fine, you said?"

"Yes, especially the first one. I was nervous enough as it is. It was just the man's old mother. She was a nice lady. But the last lady I talked to was a total bitch, Hermione!"

"Well you can't blame her, Bellatrix. Just calm down, it's done and over with. Maybe she was the worst."

"Or maybe she won't be."

"Look, you got through your first day. Just relax and be proud of yourself. These are huge steps!"

"Won't you come and visit me now?"

"Tomorrow. You'll be fine. I promise I'll visit you tomorrow afternoon, okay?"

Bellatrix grunted angrily into the phone.

"Okay?" Hermione pressed.

"…Fine."

"I love you!" Hermione put as much excitement as she could in her voice. She thought she heard a slight giggle from Bellatrix on the other side. "And I'm so proud of you, and can't wait to share the rest of my life with you almost this time next week!"

Bellatrix's earlier angry tone of voice changed to solemn one, "You want to share your life with me?"

Hermione laughed as if it was obvious, "Um, yeah, don't you want to share yours with me? I thought that's basically what we agreed on. Unless you had other plans that hopefully don't involve any Bellatrix Lestrange action."

"Well I already feel like a burden to you, I would have thought you would be happy to finally be rid of me."

"We've been over this, Bella! You're not a burden, I love you, and I want to be with you as much as you want to be with me!"

"That's a lot, Hermione; it really is a lot."

"I know, I feel it."

"I love you, too. I guess I should take a nap, since that's what I do after these things, but can I at least text you?"

"Anytime! Promise me you'll get your rest though."

"I will. I'll try and go to sleep right now and text you when I wake up."

When Bellatrix hung up, she put her phone on the table by her bed. She bounced a little on it, and looked out the window. She got up and found that she could open it, something she couldn't do to the windows in Azkaban. She sighed and told herself that this place was completely different from Azkaban. She wasn't here as a punishment. She was here to get better, and to prove herself as a human being. She laid down on the bed and closed her eyes, awaiting for the next day's plans to arrive.


	35. Chapter 35

Hermione hadn't heard from Bellatrix the rest of the night, and Bellatrix hadn't contacted her Tuesday morning or early afternoon either. She decided to finally go visit Bellatrix around 4. She put her hair up in a bun from the hot summer weather and apparated to the front of St. Mungos.

"Hello, Ms. Granger!" a lady at the front desk greeted happily. "Here to see Bellatrix?"

"Yes, ma'am. I hope things are going smoothly." Hermione handed her wrist to the lady for her to put a blue visitor's bracelet on it.

"Well things are fine as long as I'm concerned. Oh, but she's not in her room right now. She just went down to the cafeteria. Go there and you'll find her, dear."

"Thank you very much; have a good day!"

Hermione walked down the hallways following the signs that pointed her towards the cafeteria. She could smell that she was getting closer. When she finally reached the entrance to the cafeteria, she reached for her phone. The place was full of patients, nurses, doctors, and visitors. She almost decided to text her, but as she scanned the room again, she saw Bellatrix sitting alone with a tray of food. She briskly walked over, ignoring the stares from the others.

"Bella," she called out when she got close.

Bellatrix turned her head in her direction. Her dull expression turned to excitement as she turned more of her body.

"I was getting a little worried when I hadn't heard from you," Hermione sat down and Bellatrix pulled her closer holding her in a tight embrace. Before letting go, she looked up and saw that nurse from earlier with her phone out looking like she was taking a picture.

"See!" some people sitting nearby looked in their direction when Bellatrix said a little too loudly, "That nurse is taking pictures of us!"

Hermione looked to see the nurse standing sideways with her phone towards the ground, "You might just be paranoid, Bella."

"But she's going to put these pictures in the Daily Prophet, and then stories will be out about you and me. Then that will stress you out even more than you probably are with all of this."

"I don't care what they think," Hermione said quickly, holding Bellatrix's hands, "I really don't. They're already going to talk because I'm the "Golden Girl." I just feel bad for Harry and all the paparazzi he has to deal with. At least no one comes up to me."

"That's because they know it'll be the last thing they do if I hear about it."

Hermione kissed her lips, "I don't care what anyone sees, or thinks they see. Not anymore. You're more important to me. We know who we are, right? Hey, and maybe we can laugh at the stories they might make up about us."

Bellatrix looked down and then turned her body to go back to picking at her food.

"I didn't want to bother you. About not texting you last night or earlier today. And I didn't want to seem like I wasn't getting better, like I couldn't function without you. I-I mean…"

Hermione put an arm around her as Bellatrix tried to continue.

"I need you. I really need you. But I'm trying to at least be a bit more independent. Even though I would probably wither and die without you…. I-is that okay?"

Hermione squeezed her shoulder, "Of course it's okay! I'm happy for you! That's good that you're trying to help yourself more. I was just worried, but I guess that's me being dependent on you being dependent on me."

"It's just a circle then, isn't it?"

Hermione allowed Bellatrix to talk more while she finished eating. The families she saw that day were all understanding towards her, and some of them weren't even that close to the person Bellatrix had murdered. Some of the people just didn't have any immediate family left. She told Hermione how it was getting easier to write the letters, and how she wished she could go back and rewrite the ones she already gave to people.

Bellatrix held Hermione's hand as they walked to the lift to go to the second floor where her room was.

When Hermione walked in after Bellatrix, she stopped and surveyed the small room that was probably the same size as her cell in Azkaban. She was a little disappointed, but didn't say anything seeing that Bellatrix was happy with it. It had a nice bed, a desk for Bellatrix to write her letters on, and a dresser for her belongings that she brought.

"My favorite part about the room is that I can open the window," Bellatrix leaned towards the window and felt the breeze hit her face.

"Well, as long as you're happy and they're treating you right," Hermione closed the door and walked more inside the room.

"The world would know if they weren't treating me right," Bellatrix turned around and pulled Hermione down to sit on her bed, "But this room is perfect, now that you're here with me."

Hermione put a hand on Bellatrix's cheek. Bellatrix grabbed the hand kissing it before pulling her closer. She let go of her hand and wrapped her arms around her tight enough to protect her from the evils of the world, but loose enough to not break her. She turned her around and laid her down on the bed kissing her slow, but still using her domination skills when Hermione parted her lips.

Hermione guessed they had been snogging for at least five minutes before Bellatrix moved her lips to Hermione's cheek and down to her neck. Another five minutes had Hermione thinking there would surely be a noticeable mark on her neck when she left.

"I was thinking," Bellatrix lifted her head and started talking as if the last ten minutes weren't heated intimacy. "Why Neville's parents really were the only ones on the list, since I have tortured countless of other people, including you, but then I thought it was because his parents ended up here. The list would be a lot longer if they included the people I've tortured. Then you would be on the list, too. And I think you would be my hardest person to talk to."

Hermione locked eyes with Bellatrix, "I'm not going to say being under your Cruciatus curse wasn't the most unbearable pain I've ever experienced… But I would go through it again just to get back to this moment with you."

Bellatrix so badly wanted to tell her she was so full of shit, but knew Hermione would have an answer back for her, so she let her continue.

"After everything we've gone through together, it's helped me love you more than I could ever imagine. And right now, in your arms, I feel safer than I've ever felt in my entire life. You're my protector, my lover, my best friend. And I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks."

"Do you really mean it?"

Hermione sighed, "No, I made the whole thing up." They both smiled as Hermione turned Bellatrix to be the one lying underneath. Hermione bent down to give Bellatrix a mark, but stopped, "Will you get in trouble, like, do you think it's inappropriate for you to have a hickey right now?"

Bellatrix waited for Hermione to answer her own question.

"Oh fuck it, wear a scarf."

Hermione promised she would text her and call her every day until Friday afternoon when she picked her up for the weekend. Bellatrix had a new sense of confidence knowing that in a week, she would be free, have her wand, and be with Hermione without anyone having a say about it.

Wednesday went by for Bellatrix just as Tuesday went, except without Hermione visiting. After eating lunch on Thursday, she went back to the lift to go to her room. She was texting Hermione when the door to the lift opened and she lifted her head when she heard a pair of gasps.

"Andy? Cissy! You came to visit me!" Bellatrix ran into the lift and hugged them both. She turned around to push level 2 and saw that they had pushed level 5.

"Oh, good thing I caught you girls, you're not allowed to go up there, unless you're visiting a sick patient."

"Well, yes… Of course, why wouldn't we come visit you, Bella? We were going to call, but, must've slipped our minds," Narcissa said nervously.

"It's just a hospital," Bellatrix said to them eyeing their apprehensive faces, "It's not like you're visiting me in Azkaban."

"Well, I'm sad to say we can only stay but a minute, Bella," Andromeda started.

"A minute? Well what did you even come for? You can't possibly know anyone else in this hospital."

Bellatrix dragged her two sisters to her room and talked their ears off for an hour before Narcissa finally said they had to go. When Bellatrix walked them back to the lift, she noticed Narcissa pushed the UP button instead of DOWN and continued to question all the odd behaviors they've both been showing since she found them earlier.

"We're just tired, Bellatrix, really. We'll talk to you later, okay," Narcissa pushed the DOWN button and quickly helped the door to shut.

Bellatrix walked back to her room and texted Hermione about her sisters' visit.

Bellatrix: You think there's a reason they're acting strange? Or am I just crazy?

Bellatrix: Wait don't answer that

Hermione: I don't think they were acting strange.

Hermione was being honest. They weren't acting strange, but she knew they were keeping something from Bellatrix, and she also knew what it was. She wasn't supposed to let Bellatrix know until Tuesday when she went to pick her up.

Bellatrix was in deep thought about her sisters' visit until a familiar face peeked into her room. She gave a nervous smile and wave as Neville took a step forward, "Is it okay if I join you for a bit?"

"I-uh-sure," Bellatrix wasn't sure why she was stuttering around the boy. They had already talked about their links to the past. She breathed in, "What brings you here?"

"Just visiting," Neville sat down next to her on the bed, "Actually, I'm visiting my parents; it's my birthday..18."

Bellatrix gripped the side of the bed and smiled like a school girl with a crush, "H-happy birthday, then."

"You alright," Neville laughed.

Bellatrix shook herself and straightened up, "Yeah, I'm fine, just a little surprised to see you is all. But I guess it shouldn't be a surprise since this is…"

"They're fine, mum and dad, just saw them," Neville continued as Bellatrix turned her face away from him, "Maybe it's too soon, or even dumb to ask, but maybe you could see them with me sometime, if it doesn't make you uncomfortable, I mean."

Bellatrix tried looking Neville in the eyes, but kept flicking them away, "Oh, maybe, maybe…"

"Look, I'm sorry, I'm probably really making you feel uncomfortable."

"No!" Bellatrix grabbed his hand with both of hers, "I'm glad you came to see me, really. I'm sorry if I'm coming off as awkward, but, um..ever since we talked that one time and you…forgave me for what I did…. You help me feel like a normal person. I don't have to put up my walls and act all defensive like I do with everyone else."

"You don't put up walls with Hermione."

"No, you two are…two of a kind, I guess."

Neville talked with Bellatrix for half an hour before leaving. When he left, she shut the door behind him and locked it. She picked up her phone as she started crying and breathing heavily. She wanted to text or call Hermione, but she put the phone down and lied on her bed trying to calm herself on her own. She knew she would be okay. She would see Hermione tomorrow, and soon she can finally forget her past and start a new life with her sisters, Hermione, and her new friends who welcomed her into their circle without passing any harsh judgment on her previous lifestyle.


End file.
